Chapter 14

Two chapters in two days? I think that's a record for me. Anyways I wanted to get this one up in honor of no Castle on TV tonight (at least in the US). Enjoy!

Kate had been standing in from of Rick Castle's front door for almost half an hour. She wanted to be there, she was sure of it, but what if he was mad at her, upset about what she had said earlier? What if he didn't want her there anymore now that he had seen her freak out about publicity? He did say that he wasn't going to change who he was for her. She raised her hand to knock for what was probably the 20th time and dropped it again. She couldn't. she finally knew that she wanted to, and she couldn't bring herself to do it. God she had messed up so bad. But she had to try to set things right. If he didn't want her after that, well, she would find a way to deal with it.

She brought her hand up to knock just as the door flew open and Alexis ran right into her as she left the apartment. They both jumped back in surprise. "Detective?" Alexis said with a mixture of shock and confusion on her face.

"Oh, Alexis, hi. Um…I came to talk to your dad…" Beckett said hesitantly. She was looking for any sign in the redhead that Castle wasn't home or didn't want to talk to her.

"Yeah, um, he's in his office, you can go right on it, hopefully he left the door unlocked this time. Good luck." Alexis said, and was off down the hall.

Beckett stared after her for a minute before tentatively stepping inside the house and closing the door behind her. She knew where Castle's office was from the numerous nights they had spent in there working on cases after leaving the precinct. She knocked on the door and heard his voice from within say "mother I'll be out in a little while ok?"

Kate smiled and opened the door, taking a step inside. "If I'm your mother we are both screwed."

Castle spun around and stared, wide-eyed, at the brunette who had entered the room. She was the last person he had expected to see in his office that night. For a minute all he could do was stare at her, and try to take in how beautiful she looked. Her hair was slightly wet and her eyes were observing him, looking for some sign of what he was thinking. He could tell she was nervous and it was all he could do to keep from taking her up in his arms and telling her that she had no reason to be.

"I'm sorry, if this is a bad time or I shouldn't be here I can go…" she started but Castle stopped her.

"No, no its fine, I just…didn't expect to see you here."

"Yeah…" her face felt flushed as she tried to think of what she was going to say next. She hadn't really gotten that far in her though process. She took a deep breath and shook her head as she looked up at Castle. He had taken a couple of steps closer while she was looking down and she could see he was trying to control whatever emotions he was feeling. "I freaked out, earlier."

"Well, Creepy McStalker put your picture in the paper, I would have been concerned if you hadn't said anything."

She couldn't help but smile at his attempt to lighten the mood. She looked up at him and lost her train of thought in his blue eyes. She opened her mouth and shut it again, not able to formulate a coherent thought. She realized what the emotion he had been hiding was and it shocked her. He was actually happy to see her. He wasn't upset at all, but looking at her with such admiration that it took her breath away.

"Was there something else you wanted to say detective?" he asked, taking another step towards her.

"You're not upset about what happened?"

"If you mean mad you then no. I was… upset with myself for not being able to stop it, for not warning you about some of the publicity I get. I was upset with myself for not…protecting you." He was looking into her eyes as he reached a hand up to her cheek and kept talking. "I was hurt when you walked away, but I know you have a job to do. But I'm not mad at you, I don't think I ever really could be."

She took a deep breath and tried to forget about the fact that his hand was still on her face. "Castle, I know I'm hard to work with sometimes. I get caught up in things and snap at people. But you've been following me around for almost two years and haven't run screaming for the hills yet. Having you around has changed how we do our job and," she hesitated and looked up at him, so she could gauge his reaction. She knew he cared about her, but she wasn't sure about what she was saying. Taking the next step, and laying everything she was feeling on the line wasn't something she was used to. "It's changed me. I know that I'm strong, and I know I can hold my own, but I've come to realize that every once in a while I need someone to lean on. I've had a lot thrown at me the past two years since you've been around, hell I've had a lot thrown at me in the past week, and you've always been there, no questions asked. I've never had anyone like you before Castle, and today, I was really scared that I had done something to lose you. I need you Rick, and I want you around. I want you…with me." She gulped and waited for a response.

Castle stayed silent and watched as she talked. He heard the emotion in her voice and knew this was the chance he had been waiting for, the chance he had to show her how special she was to him. And he knew she was giving him that chance. She was finally letting him in. very rarely was he at a loss for words, but the way she talked, her eyes, everything about her seemed to have that effect on him, and it wasn't the first time. When she finished talking he didn't know how to tell her what he was thinking, so he decided to show her.

He moved his hand from her cheek to the back of her head and wove his fingers through her hair. He took a step closer and put the other hand on her hip, drawing her up against him. He leaned down and brushed his lips up against hers tentatively. When she tilted her head up to allow him better access he kissed her harder, more fiercely, trying to convey everything going through his head.

Oh god, she thought as he kissed her. This was amazing. They had kissed before, heck they had done more than kiss, but it had never been like this. They had both always held on to some sort of control. Her not wanting to admit how much she wanted and needed him, him trying not to push her too hard. She put her arms around his neck and he lifted her up a little bit. All of a sudden she was up against the bookshelf and she couldn't seem to catch her breath.

Rick picked that moment to pull back, leaning his forehead up against hers and pushing her hair out of her face. "You know, if we're really going to do this, really try and make this work, I'm going to be impossible to get rid of. You'll be stuck with me for a really long time."

They both laughed and she tilted her head to touch their lips together. "Castle, you're already impossible to get rid of, but I think I can handle it."

"So you'll stay tonight?" she bit her lip and nodded. "Good, let's go to bed. It's been a long day for both of us. And you can catch me up on what happened this afternoon."

Kate let herself be led upstairs and then let Castle take her coat from her. He tossed it on a chair and turned back to her. "I'm just going to take a shower really quick if you don't mind." She nodded and watched him go into the bathroom and close the door. Once she heard the water running she went to her space in the closet and pulled out a pair of sweatpants and her favorite comfy shirt. She crawled under the covers and curled up in a ball, thinking.

She inhaled the scent of Rick Castle, and kicked herself for not admitting that she needed him sooner. It had been so easy, he had accepted her with open arms, taken her back even though she had yelled at him earlier that afternoon. He was amazing, she had realized that a long time ago but now that she was letting her control go it was better than she had imagined. She only hoped that he would do the same. From the kiss they had shared in his office she had a feeling he would.

She didn't hear his get out of the shower but all of a sudden he was climbing into bed next to her. She rolled over and snuggled as close to him as she could, laying her head on his chest.

Rick was surprised at the sudden display of affection from Beckett but didn't complain. He was glad she was there and that was all that mattered. He put an arm around her and inhaled the scene of her cherry shampoo. He asked her about what happened that afternoon and listened in amazement as she told him about the panic room in Brians' house and finding Kaylee in there just sitting reading a book.

"Wait so you're telling me there was an actual panic room in this case and I missed it?"

She looked at him sheepishly "Sorry, Ryan said you would be mad."

He kissed her forehead "It's ok, I forgive you."

She smiled as she tried to get even closer to him. They laid for a little while in silence and just enjoyed each other's' company. Finally Kate spoke up. Her voice was groggy with sleep. "Castle, I'm glad I came back. I'm glad you're here."

He looked down and the woman in his arms. "I'm glad you came back too." He smiled and thought about all of the things they would do together. Maybe she would move in permanently now, even though the case was over. He fell asleep thinking about making her dinner by candlelight and taking her out. Finally he thought, I can show her how much she means to me.

I had people telling me I had better have them end up together so there you go :p

Not like I was planning on anything different. Next chapter will probably be the last but a sequel might be in the works. Let me know what you think? :D