"You're pretty." The small voice announced. Casey smiled at the compliment. So did the nurse who stood waiting in the corner of the cubicle.
"Thank you. And you're very handsome." Casey replied to the four-year old in front of her.
"Do you have a boyfriend?" Her tiny paramour questioned.
"Eric! You can't ask the doctor that. It's not polite!" The little boy's embarrassed mother cried.
Casey laughed. "No I'm single." She told him with a wink and then nodded to the nurse. "Thanks Rosita, he's fine now. Just a pack of tissues and an after-care leaflet, I think." She turned back to Eric. "No more sticking Lego up your nose, young man! Mommy and you would have had more fun enjoying spring at the park than in the ER."
"Aw! But then I wouldn't have met you." He stated, wiggling his eyebrows.
Casey laughed again. "You remind me of someone. Take care, Eric." She said standing up and, with a shake of the mother's hand, left the cubicle.
"What do you mean, "single"?" Rosita asked as she joined Casey at the nurses' station a few minutes later. "What happened to that gorgeous hunk of a guy who's always hanging around at lunchtime…break-time…the end of your shift?"
Casey frowned, although Rosita wasn't fooled. "Gorgeous hunk of a man? Nope…you lost me."
Rosita laughed. "Yeah. That one. The one you're always arguing with."
Her friend rolled her eyes at the nurse. "Don't whatever you do let him hear you say that. We'll never hear the end of it. And for the record, we're not dating. He's just…"
Whatever she had been about to say was lost as there was a thumping of the ambulance bay doors and two paramedics started to back through the space trailing a wheelchair with a bleeding man in it.
"What have we got?" Casey asked dashing to assist.
"Head injury." The paramedic replied. "This guy's a cop. Fell from some scaffolding."
"Scaffolding?" Casey clarified in surprise and then her eyes widened. "Cop?" She looked down at the patient. To her relief the guy was conscious and didn't look too bad or, more importantly, familiar but she motioned for the paramedics to take him into an examination room and one of her junior colleagues took over, following the wheelchair through the curtain.
"He was chasing a bad guy and slipped." An oh-too-familiar voice said from Casey's left and she glanced up to see Derek beside her. He looked tired, but it didn't stop her heart and stomach from flipping as her blue eyes met his brown. There was a spark of fun and something else between them which she recovered from quickly.
"What are you doing here?" Casey asked arching an eyebrow.
Derek shrugged. "I was chasing the bad guy too. I was with Rudy when he came round on the dirt."
Casey stopped dead. "You were chasing a bad guy across scaffolding?" She asked in disbelief. He could almost see the crescendo coming in her posture. As Casey exploding was no unusual occurrence, some of Casey's colleagues stopped what they were doing to watch.
"Yes."
"Are you an idiot? You could have fallen!" No crescendo, she started forte. A couple of interns flinched.
"Aw! She cares!" Derek grinned wearily at the growing audience. Did the guy have a death-wish?
"Of course I care!" Casey hissed in a whisper so loud they could probably hear her in Maternity. "It's me that gets to patch you up when they bring you in."
"Relax! I have excellent balance." Derek, however, was still calm.
"Which is off-set by your over-sized dumb head."
"Now, now honey. Be nice."
But, Casey's volume knob was apparently broken. "Mikey, you've been working double shifts for three days now. You're so tired you can't even walk straight at ground level let alone a couple of storeys up."
Derek rolled his eyes at her over-protectiveness – and at the fact that she wasn't so angry that she forgot his alternate identity. "It was one storey up, and I was following behind Rudy. Good job too. After Rudy fell, I carried on and arrested the perp…at ground level. And who are you to talk to me about working doubles? Little Miss 'I'll be alright pulling this extra shift just as soon as I get my caffeine shot'…"
Derek glanced around the ER as he finished speaking. By now half of Casey's colleagues had stopped what they were doing to listen to the argument (it was something the department looked forward to watching, breaking up as it did the monotony of a quiet moment – Casey and Derek never argued if it was busy.)
"At least I go to sleep in our bed." Casey stated, folding her arms pointedly. "You fall asleep on the couch on the rare occasions when you do come home. When was the last time we even slept together?"
It didn't take Casey long to realise what she had just shouted.
"I mean…I…" She stumbled over her words. Derek chuckled.
"Don't!" Casey begged. She lifted her head and regarded the people around her. "I mean…we don't…we're not…" She took a deep breath. "I mean we may share a bed but I…we don't…sleep together."
"Yes we do." Derek interrupted. Technically he was right. They might share a bed and fall asleep together but the important point Casey was attempting to clarify was that they weren't lovers.
"Shut up Michael!" She snapped. "You're making people think we have carnal relations."
At Casey's outburst, a nearby a grandmother covered her baby granddaughter's ears. The action caused Derek to laugh loudly and Casey to mouth "sorry" at the woman. Casey grabbed hold of Derek by his leather jacket and dragged him into a nearby supply closet.
"Ooo…be gentle with me." Derek called out as he disappeared into the tiny room.
The door clicked behind them but not before they heard the giggles from the nurses' station.
"You're a moron, Venturi." Casey said in the confined space, her arms folded and her eyes flashing anger.
"I wasn't the one who started questioning our sleeping habits in front of the whole of the ER." Derek pointed out, all sign of weariness gone. It was ever thus.
"You distracted me." She complained with a pout.
Derek's face lit up. "I did? Cool."
"Der-ek!" But her voice was quiet, exasperated.
He chuckled and putting his hands on her hips, drew her to him. She unfolded her arms and let him pull her close.
"Don't…Casey. Just relax and laugh about it. Don't be so tense." He locked his fingers together behind her back, inwardly marvelling at how he could get away with such affectionate gestures to her these days.
"I can't relax." She groaned, resting her forehead against his shoulder. "It's just not me."
"What? Sane?" he chuckled at his own joke.
"You're infuriating." She said wearily.
Realising she had hit a limit, Derek stopped the teasing. "You're exhausted. You work too hard." He told her. His lips pressing into her hair.
Casey leaned back and brushed his hair from his face. "So do you." She said softly and he wanted to kiss her, but he didn't because even though they had kissed previously they weren't there…they weren't a couple - nor based on current evidence were they ever likely to be.
"Promise me you won't pull a double tonight." He said quietly. "And you'll schedule some time off."
"I'll try." Casey hedged.
"I promise not to sleep on the couch if you come home on time."
Casey snorted. "I'll believe it when I see it, buster."
"I'll try…I just hope that asshole Robin isn't around when you work late."
"Derek…" her tone warned.
"What? He is an asshole. He's old enough to be your father and he's totally after your ass."
Casey rolled her eyes. "Derek, don't be ridiculous. He's eight years older than me…and he's my boss. He's just trying to be a friend to me because I'm new in Ottawa. It was a really generous gesture of his to arrange for my secondment."
"Like there was no fucking self-interest in that decision…" Derek's tired irritation boiled over into anger.
"You sound like a petulant teenager. Maybe you should relax."
He didn't answer. The argument about Robin was an old one by now, because it had started with that phone call at the beginning of the year – the one where Robin first asked Casey out to dinner. It had been that dinner "date" where he had suggested Casey should apply for a year-long secondment to Ottawa – an idea which Derek had both loved and hated: loved because it meant Casey wouldn't be leaving, hated because Casey would be working with Robin.
He had had suspicions about what Casey's "boss" was after with his job offer and the suspicions were confirmed when Derek finally met the guy a couple of weeks later. There had been an instant mutual dislike as the two men sized each other up. What Casey considered "charming and approachable", Derek found "leery" and in some ways plain "creepy". This man would take advantage of Casey at the first opportunity – and Derek vowed to do everything to prevent that.
Halfway through the "friendly dinner" with Derek and Casey, Robin had suggested that Casey move into hospital accommodation which was convenient for the commute to work – and "coincidentally" where he himself lived. For a very bad half an hour, Derek thought Casey was considering it, and it took everything in his willpower not to make a scene. He knew Casey and he knew that if he objected to it, she would move out of his apartment (and probably his life) the following day.
That day in the restaurant, the only signs Casey had of Derek's disquiet was the tensing of his hand on the small of her back and when she queried the tension with her eyes, the panic reflected back. It had come as something of a shock – and relief- to Derek when Casey had replied that for the time being she was quite comfortable with her current accommodation situation. There had also been a touch of smugness.
Later when they were alone, Casey had pushed to know what was up and Derek had been forced to confess his dislike of Robin. She hadn't been happy. They had argued about it, and Casey threatened to change her mind about the living arrangements. No sooner had the words left her lips, however and she knew that it wouldn't be happening anytime soon. The weight on her own chest at the thought of such a step reminded her that whilst she was sure she could be away from him if absolutely necessary she couldn't hurt their "friendship" that way. She wasn't exactly sure how to term this "relationship" but she wasn't ready to damage it.
That night, his arm had seemed tighter than normal around her middle as they slept.
Back to the supply closet now, and in an effort to change the subject Derek asked about his colleague. "Will Rudy be okay?"
"It doesn't look too serious at first glance, but with head injuries you can't be sure. We'll clean him up and admit him for observation. Are you going home?"
"Nah. Spike's out of the office this afternoon, so I'm "it"."
She chuckled. "Your ego will love that. What time are you home?"
"As soon as I can, princess. I'll text you…okay?"
"Okay."
Derek, in gratitude at the lack of pressure (and just because he never passed up an opportunity to do it) pressed a kiss against her nose.
"And don't work so hard." He said in a murmur.
"Right back at ya!" Casey smiled as their foreheads touched.
Later, Casey followed Derek to the hospital entrance to say goodbye. She saw with concern the slumping of his shoulders and the paleness of his skin. She knew they both worked far too hard. It was a sign of their age, because they were young enough to have the work piled on, old enough to have acquired responsibility in their roles, and they were that in-between stage in life where they had yet to have children.
It was hard to see someone you love wearing themselves down. She wanted to be able to comfort him, to rub the day from his aching muscles and to tell him how proud she was of his achievements. But that was the role of the person who walked beside him in life – the role and responsibility of a girlfriend. And Casey, whilst loving him unconditionally, did not own that title.
In the few months since she had made the decision to stay (temporarily) in Ottawa, Casey had continued the constant contemplation of her relationship with Derek. She mentally considered many titles and descriptions but none of them fit. The closest she could find was that he was her best friend. But that wasn't a snug fit either. Not many people sleep in the same bed night after night with their best friend – or at least not unless they were in a marriage or a committed relationship where "best friend" was another term for "lover".
The co-sleeping had continued, becoming so normal to her that she actually struggled to sleep on the occasions where their shift patterns didn't gel or Derek fell asleep on the couch. She needed the feel of the extra weight on the other side of the bed, the soft gentle sighing of his sleeping breaths and the warm, pleasantly-restricting presence of his out-slung arm around her middle.
Sometimes when they were at their most honest; at their most quiet and considerate of each other, Casey could almost believe he needed her beside him in the bed too.
Breaking herself from her thoughts, Casey turned from the hospital doors, walked across to the station again, picked up the next set of patient notes and briefly flicked through them. Rosita was perched on a rotating chair nearby, her usually cheerful face wearing an uncharacteristic frown.
"What's up?" Casey asked.
Rosita shook her head and rubbed the back of her neck in confusion. "I don't know. Would you have time to look at a patient for me? It's one allocated to Alistair."
Casey looked taken a back. "Sure…is there a problem? Is Alistair not available?"
"He's taking a break because he's been on for ten hours straight but this patient is in pain and I don't know why. I mean, we know why there is pain but…" her voiced trailed away.
"Come on, lead the way." Casey said straightening and sticking her pen back into the pocket of her scrubs.
A few minutes later, Casey too was wearing an identical frown as they emerged from the patient's cubicle.
"I have to say, I'm confused too." She admitted. "You're right. I have no idea why he's in such pain."
"I've given him the maximum morphine dose. It's enough to knock out a bull, and while I have to admit that he's asleep right now, his vitals are clearly indicating he's in pain. He shouldn't feel anything."
"I know. He can't have any more morphine, but I'll recommend an alternative pain killer. It won't be as effective but anything is better than nothing."
"Thanks Casey." Rosita looked around her. "Has Mikey gone?"
"Yes. He had to get back."
"So what is the deal with you two anyway?"
Casey chuckled. "If you ever work it out, please tell me!"
"How is he?" Jazz asked looking up from his desk when Derek returned to the office.
Derek shrugged as he took off his jacket, exposing the gun and its holster. "They're going to do a CT scan and keep him in for observation but he looks a lot better than he did when I first saw him lying there on the ground.
"Who's with him?" Jazz watched Derek hang the jacket up and flop into his chair at the desk.
"His girlfriend. He called her from the ER and she came over."
Jazz nodded. "Is she hot?"
Derek rolled his eyes. "You have a one-track mind, don't you?"
His friend laughed at Derek's reluctance to bite. "And how is Casey? I assume you saw her." Jazz had met Casey while he was recuperating from his leg injury on the Papillion case. He saw Casey and he saw Derek interact with her and Jazz knew straight away.
Derek snorted and shook his head in despair. "Who said I saw her?"
"Like you are going to pass up the opportunity for a fight with Casey…"
"We didn't fight."
Jazz raised an eyebrow. Derek surrendered.
"Okay. Maybe just a little fight." He smirked.
Jazz sighed. "You know, having sex is more fun."
Derek shook his head. "You've never had a fight with Casey. Watching her face at the exact moment she realises you've outwitted her…priceless."
"What about watching her face in the heat of the moment? If you are going to fight with her, at least have the make-up sex."
"Sex? With Casey?" Derek snorted. "Over her dead body."
Derek had quickly moved the subject on to the issues affecting the department. With Rich's betrayal and Derek's subsequent promotion, Spike's absences left Derek and Jazz as numbers one and two in the department; Jazz might well be confined to desk duty with his leg still in a cast, but his intelligent reading of situations was an asset neither Spike nor Derek were willing to give up.
"I've been thinking." Jazz said after a moment. "You know this "keep your personal lives personal" policy… it's just…"
"…not working." Derek finished.
"No."
"What do we do about it?"
Jazz shrugged. "We encourage people to "share"?"
Derek snorted. "Since when did you get to be Ricki Lake?"
"Since some dick of a co-worker tried to shaft us and we all know he wasn't the first."
"He probably won't be the last either." Derek pointed out.
"No but I'd rather get an inkling if he's crooked before he's holding a gun to my head."
"And how are we going to achieve that?"
"We all need to spend more time together. That way we can suss each other out."
Derek frowned "What do you want me to do? Send out a memo saying "date a co-worker"?"
"Don't be an ass, Mikey. I mean we should organise some team-building events outside of hours. We can get "S" division to cover so everyone can take part."
"What sort of events?" Derek wasn't buying this. "The guys won't want to go-karingt."
"I was thinking more rock-climbing or a baseball game in the park and chuck some meat on the grill. We could invite girlfriends and families to the latter."
Derek sighed. "I guess we have to do something. I'll leave it up to you but I'd suggest something that involves only our department to start off. We'll wait to invite significant others until I'm sure this lot aren't a bunch of mass murderers."
It was late – again- when Casey left the female locker room dressed in street clothes, her purse slung over her shoulder. She was, however, earlier than she had been in weeks and she smiled at the thought of being home early enough for a long soak in the bath and the chance to eat something before bed. She was thoughtful as she walked the deserted corridors to the public area of the trauma unit, wondering if Derek was home already, or if he too had been forced to stay late by his over-developed sense of duty. The Derek of her teenaged years was flaky and unreliable but more carefree. This Derek was dependable, loyal and fiercely protective, and he wasn't as fun-loving as he had been.
Casey didn't care. She was just glad he was alive.
"How do you manage it?" A voice said from a dark corner as she passed. "It's the butt-end of a long shift and you still look fantastic."
Casey rolled her eyes and stopped. "Hi Robin. Flattery at this time of night?" She said, smiling despite the little Derek devil on her shoulder whispering "He's just trying to get in your pants" in her ear.
"With you, gorgeous, the flattery is due any time of the day. You off home?"
"I am." Casey confirmed. "It's been a long day."
Robin emerged from the shadows.
"I'm still hearing great things about you." He said. "You're a hit, girl!"
Casey looked relieved. "I'm trying. Things are a little different than in London. I don't want to tread on anyone's toes."
"Sometimes a little change and a kick up the pants is what we all need. It's all good Casey. Now, when are you going to let me take you out to dinner to celebrate?"
He leaned against the wall to the side of Casey's head and smirked at her. She chuckled. He really was very good-looking and the attention was flattering. He was, however, her boss.
"I'm really busy at the moment…I don't know…maybe next week?"
"Sure. I'm thinking French this time. Italian is so over done, don't you think?"
Casey ignored the jibe that Robin obviously thought she wouldn't notice. Last time she had been to dinner with Robin was the never-to-be-forgotten meal with Derek. They had visited an Italian restaurant close to their apartment which Derek raved about. The choice of food then had been Derek's and Robin knew that.
"French sounds nice." Casey replied, sounding tired. "Check with Susan and see which evenings I'm not on lates. I won't book anything else until I know which day you've chosen."
"Great! It'll be nice to catch up – just the two of us."
As Casey got into her car, she cursed the need for grown men to butt horns like that. Why couldn't they just get on? This one-upmanship didn't make sense. What were they fighting over?
Her?
She groaned as she realised on some level they probably were indeed fighting over her. It puzzled her. One was her step-brother, the other one her boss. Casey couldn't date either of them, so she failed to see the point.
Exasperated, she drove home, her mind pondering the idea of relationships with unattainable men.
The apartment was still in darkness when she arrived and there was no note from Derek since he was still at work. Her phone vibrated as she slipped her coat off and hung it up.
Sorry…another late one. Don't wait up. Dx
Casey shook her head, a sad smile on her lips. In many ways it was a good thing that he didn't have a girlfriend. Not least the fact that a girlfriend might be upset by his long hours and uninformative text messages. Casey, however, understood.
Just got in. I'll leave you some food in the fridge. Try not to fall asleep on the couch. And no more scaffolding. Cx
Across the other side of the city, her words made Derek smile. Casey was pretty much the perfect partner. On a superficial level she could cook, she had an obsessive need to clean and she was easy on the eye, but there was more to it than that. She had listened to him about finishing work early and she was concerned about him: that he wouldn't eat, that he wouldn't make it to bed, or that he might put himself in danger. Coupled with her understanding that it wasn't his choice to work late and her failure to show any ire when he broke their "plans" he couldn't think of anyone else he would rather share his life with.
But then Casey could be a complete slob, incapable of boiling water and as ugly as sin…he'd still think she was perfect. Perfect for him. And of course maybe, one day, maybe he'd even get around to telling her…
…and stand back while she bolted for the hills.
Casey, freshly bathed and fed, wrapped a plate of food for Derek and placed it in the fridge. She wrote Cook as Usual on a post-it note and stuck it to the plate. Then she closed the fridge door, clicked off the kitchen light and took herself off to bed.
Clean sheets, clean Casey, early night and a good book. Coupled with her tired state and the run of long shifts, it didn't take her long to fall asleep. Her body rising and falling slowly with the contented sighs of sleep.
And though she didn't know it, it was only an hour later when a draught blew around her suddenly exposed back and then the bed dipped behind her. A strong arm slid around her waist, lips pressed against her hair, then something cold brushed against her feet.
"Ew! Your feet are cold." She moaned now only half-asleep.
"So warm them up." Derek chuckled in her ear.
"Did you eat?" She asked sleepily.
"Yes…thank you. And I'm not asleep on the couch." He whispered proudly.
"Good. Now shut up and let me sleep." She ordered, promptly falling asleep to the sound of Derek chuckling.