"IDIOTS! INCOMPETENT FOOLS!" Claw shouted, while choking M.A.D. Cat with his gloved hand. "THERE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE NO SLIPUPS! NO FAILURE WHATSOEVER!
"Sorry Dr. Claw" M.A.D. Agent Fred trembled, "But it wasn't our fault, it was this –
"I know who, you hulking brute! Just when I thought Gadget was too much trouble, this…this BATMAN is twice the nuisance Gadget could ever be! I need to think. Round up the rest of the agents and wait for further instructions. NOW GET OUT OF MY SIGHT!"
He angrily pushes a button on his console and the face Agent Fred dissipates from his computer screen. Claw then lets go of M.A.D. Cat, whose face now red and flushed, immediately returns to normal, sucking in air rapidly that it was deprived of a few minutes ago.
"Things are getting out of hand, M.A.D. Cat. This Batman creature has proven to be a major threat to my operation. Too many of my schemes have failed because of Gadget's interference. Too long have I waited for this moment. World power and glory for M.A.D. is within my reach and it will not be stopped now by some FREAK in a Halloween costume!"
Suddenly, an idea popped into Claw's head that made him chuckle with amusement, giving M.A.D. Cat shivers down his spine. With that Claw, pressed a button on his console and a large list of articles appeared on his screen.
Cut to the Ace Chemical Plant, a run-down, dilapidated chemical plant near downtown Gotham. Inside it was pitch black, not much one could see except a desk in the center with a dimly lit lamp on top. Clownish weapons, poisons, and toxins disguised as toys were scattered about as well as numerous pictures/clippings of Batman pinned to the walls everywhere. A figure was seated at the desk playing solitaire while attempting to throw knives backwards at picture of Batman posted on the dartboard. Suddenly, the phone on the desk rang….
"Hello?" the voice replied. "What's that you say? A job? Interested? Oh, most certainly."
At that he threw a knife at the poster and it hit the picture of Batman right squarely in the middle of his forehead. A quiet laughter filled the room.
Back at Wayne Manor, several hours have passed. Bruce Wayne had changed out of his costume and was now waiting outside the guest room. The door opened. Leslie Thompkins, Bruce's surrogate mother and medical clinic, walked out of the guest room and shut the door behind her.
"How is she, Leslie?" Bruce asked concerned.
"Well, Bruce, she seems very healthy" Leslie began. "A few minor scrapes and bruises, her body and its assets appear to be functioning properly…But….
"But what?"
"That blow she received on the back of her head has left some damage impact to her brain. Only minor though. Nothing too serious. Yet, as a result, she has what appears to be a mild combination of both traumatic and lacunar amnesia."
"Yes, I remember reading up on something like that in a medical journal. It's a very rare form of memory loss in which the victim is unable to recall events due to interference in the short/long-term memory transfer mechanism."
"Or in this case" Leslie added, "Any specific event. She remembers who she is, her past and present memories, but she is having trouble recalling what happened the night of the accident and maybe some events that happened prior to that moment."
"How long will this last?"
"Not sure. This form is usually transient, but sometimes it can be permanent…Bruce, what on earth happened? How did she end up like this?"
"I don't know where to start. I was investigating a robbery down at one of the storage warehouses for Wayne Enterprises. Strange thing is these were new guys, not new to this area I could tell. I managed to get the drop on them when out of nowhere the doors shut on them automatically. She was standing there beside the van with a weird device in her hand. What was she thinking? A little girl in the middle of the night? Oh…It's happening again, Leslie!"
"What Bruce? What?" Leslie asked getting worried.
"The other night the same thing happened. As a consequence to my own tenacity, I accidentally injured a little girl while I was fighting The Joker. I let my own stubbornness get in the way."
"Bruce…You know I haven't been your biggest fan when it comes to your "nightly" activities…but…seriously, maybe you should consider taking some time off from this crimefighting lifestyle for a while…Well, I have to be off, let me know if anything else comes up. But for now she needs her rest."
Leslie walks down the hall towards the front door while Bruce opens the door slightly, staring at Penny sleeping in the bed with an ice pack to support her neck and head.
"Time off…A vacation…maybe a permanent one too" Bruce added.
Bruce gently closes the door with that comment.
Back at Dr. Claw's lair, everything was calm and quiet when a rapid knocking came at the door.
"Yes?" Claw demanded.
The doors kicked open as two M.A.D. Agents, guarding the door, dropped to the floor, smiling and laughing in a creepy manner. A figure in a fedora and trench coat walked in past them and approached Claw's desk.
"I hear you're looking for a professional. Allow me to answer to your plea, Ernst Blofeld" the figure smiled while taking off his hat, revealing his face to be that of The Joker.
"Who is this clown?" Claw asked his laughing agents.
"Not clown. Joker." Joker answered.
With that he threw one of his razor playing cards on the table, nearly missing M.A.D. Cat, who hissed at him.
"You must be the infamous Clown Prince of Crime, The Joker."
"Everyone in Gotham knows my name. The best of the best, the crème de la crème, with a flick of my wrist and blast from my gun – Ah, well you know the rest! HEHEHE! But now to business: So tell me, Doc, what's a mysterious overlord like yourself want with bombastic lowlife like me?"
"I want you to – " Claw began.
"Oh wait, I forgot my resume!"
Joker reaches into his coat pocket and pulls out a long list, which he piles onto Claw's desk.
"It's a long list, I know, but I wanted to pad my resume just in case this was one of those you know restrictive fraternities. HAHAHA. You never know. Don't bother reading I can sum it all up for you: Murder, Conspiracy, Arson, Bribery, Fraud, Domestic Violence, Torture, Theft, Larceny, Rape, Robbery, Perjury, Embezzlement, Forgery, Hate Crimes, Homicide, Double Homicide, Triple Homicide –
"THAT'S ENOUGH!!" Claw screamed, smacking the papers off his desk angrily.
"But I haven't even gotten to the juicy parts yet!" Joker complained.
"THAT WILL BE ALL! NOW! That list of your….skills will not be required. I have something else in mind that is of dire need to me." Claw explained. "For years now, my organization, M.A.D., has always dreamed of global domination and to bring anarchy and chaos to the world. But yet, I have always failed to grasp my destiny.…There has always been one man that has stood in the way of my ambitions, thwarting me everywhere I go like a disease…Inspector Gadget."
"He's not one of those stiff, rigid British spies, is he?"
"The man is an incompetent buffoon! Clumsy, idiotic, reckless, he couldn't fight his way out of a PAPER BAG! Yet…someway…somehow he always manages to defeat me!
He bangs his fist on his desk, jettisoning M.A.D. Cat into the air and landing with a thud on the ground.
I'm too close. I can't suffer another defeat…Here's my offer: Take over as head of my operation and eliminate Gadget for me once and for all…And no amount of monetary wealth in the world would be enough supply you with as much as I'm willing to offer you."
"Uuuuhhhhh…No. No thanks. HEHE. You see, I don't do pest control. It's clearly stated in the resume" Joker replied, refusing his offer. "Intrigued I am, but I'm afraid you'll have to find someone else to carry out your operation.Well, it's been fun. Thanks for the giggles, Ernst, I'll be seeing you…never. HAHAHAHAHA!"
Joker begins to walk towards the exit.
"Such a pity" Claw started slowly, "Perhaps this might spark your interest. My agents were raiding a facility the other night where my plot was thwarted by an old friend of yours."
"Friend?" Joker said suspiciously.
"A man of nocturnal habit. Whose soul is as dark as the night itself. Who prowls on criminals, reducing them to nothing, but tears…I believe you call him…Batman.
Abruptly, Joker, in a fit of rage, grabs a piece of furniture and throws it across the room where it smashes into pieces.
"BATMAN!! Everywhere I go, everywhere I turn – he's there! Waiting…Waiting for me. But for what? To kick my keister back into Arkham? No. No, no, no. He wants a piece of me! And I want a piece of him! NO! Not a piece! I want his heart! His beating heart…to take to the grave with me! But alas! Chance…Luck…Fate. I'll never be rid of him" Joker cried out helplessly.
"It appears I was mistaken" Claw mocked. "What am I doing offering you this opportunity when you can't even kill a simple man who dresses as a flying rodent?"
Joker pounds his fist on the desk, which sends M.A.D. Cat back to the ground, who was trying all this while to climb back up.
"There is nothing simple about that man!" Joker hissed in an angry tone. "Fine. I'll take the job, on one condition: I slaughter this parasite detective of yours and you will help me take out the Bat, so I may finally create my grand masterpiece – His delectable, delightful demise…His death."
"Deal" Claw agreed.
They shook hands on it in which Claw handed Joker a piece of paper afterwards.
"Here's your first assignment. I want the shipment here by tomorrow afternoon."
Joker exits, closing the door behind him.
"Fool!" Claw chuckled to himself.
"Sucker!" Joker cackled to himself, outside the door.