Nathan should really make a career out of running away, because he does such a damn good job at it.

The day that Keith confronted him about Lucas scared the crap out of him. Sure, it's all well and good if nobody knows he and his brother have feelings for each other, but the threat of one of their family members finding out is enough to make Nathan want to hide his feelings forever. He does love Lucas, so much it hurts, but is it worth being isolated from his family and friends?

At first, it wasn't. But now he isn't so sure. He's pretty sure his mom and dad are getting a divorce, so it's not like they're really much of a family anymore.

So instead of just saying fuck it and being with Lucas anyway like he wants, he just ran, like he always does, and he really hates himself for it. So much for not being scared anymore.

Also, if he has to see Lucas cry one more time because of him he might drive himself off of a cliff. Not like Haley would let him talk to Lucas anyway. For whatever reason, every time he finally gets the balls to say something to Lucas, Haley pops up out of nowhere and drags him off. He also noticed the two of them haven't been talking recently, and every time he brings it up Haley changes the subject so fast he barely has time to blink. Nathan wishes he could just break up with her and get it over with, but she provides him with a nice distraction, and a good cover story if he and Lucas almost get caught again.

If they ever do anything to get caught again.

"You okay?" Haley asks him. The two of them are in her room trying to study, but Nathan's too damn distracted to be of any use.

"Yeah, just thinking," Nathan responds, still pretending like he's actually reading the history book he's holding.

"About?"

"Stuff."

"What kind of stuff?"

"Just stuff, okay?" Nathan says, getting a little agitated about Haley's constant interrogating.

"Whatever you say," Haley says, going back to her book. "Isn't this weird though?"

"What?" He asks, not sure what she's talking about.

"You and me in my room alone together. Never thought i'd ever be in my room with the great Nathan Scott," Haley says, nudging him with her foot.

"It is pretty strange," Nathan says, nodding his head. "And to think I only came to you for tutoring to mess with Lucas. Now look at us."

Suddenly Haley's expression switches from happy to pissed off.

"I'm sorry, what did you just say?" Haley asks.

"About what?" Nathan responds.

"About the way we started."

"Well, I figured the easiest way to mess with Lucas was to hook up with you, so….," Nathan tells her, not really sure why she looks like she wants to smack him right now….

..Crap

"Wait, Haley, I can explain -"

"Unbelievable," She says, shaking her head. "So everything between us has been a lie?"

Well, sort of.

"Of course not Haley, just -"

"I jumped down Lucas's throat for nothing," She says.

Wait a minute, what?

"Huh?" Nathan asks, arching an eyebrow.

"Forget it, Nathan," Haley says.

"Why did you jump down his throat?" Nathan asks. There's something she hasn't been telling him and he's sick and tired of her avoiding the subject.

"Because I saw the two of you kiss, okay?!" Haley yells.

The feeling Nathan got in the pit of his stomach when Keith approached him is back, and this time it's ten times worse.

"I told him to stay away from you, and if he didn't I would tell everybody about…," Haley starts, looking increasingly more nervous.

And suddenly that feeling is gone. Why the hell would she do something like that?!

"Tell everybody what, exactly?" Nathan yells, absolutely furious. "So not only would you be ruining his life, you'd be willing to ruin mine too?"

"Of course not, Nathan, I was just mad and jealous and - "

"And being a bitch," Nathan finishes for her. "So I guess everything's out in the open now, huh?"

"Guess so," Haley says. "Except for one thing. Do you have feelings for Lucas, too?"

"Haley -"

"Do you?" Haley asks again, folding her arms.

He wants to just say yes and get it over with, but his fear is taking over again.

"I.. I don't know," Nathan says, his gaze sinking to the floor.

"How can you not know?!" Haley says. "It's a simple yes or no question."

"Fine then! Yes, okay?!" Nathan yells before he even realizes the words are coming out of his mouth. His eyes are still fixed to the floor; he's too afraid to look at her face right now.

"So was there ever anything between us?" Haley asks, sounding like she's on the verge of tears.

"I thought that there could be," Nathan answers. "Truth is, I was just too scared to admit to myself I have feelings for Lucas. Still am. Figured if I could fall in love with somebody else that I would forget about him."

"I'm such an idiot," Haley says. "I lost my best friend for nothing."

"No you're not," Nathan says, looking up at her now, seeing her face buried in her hands. "If anything I'm the idiot. If I wasn't so scared to admit my feelings it would've spared all of us a lot of heartache. I'm sorry."

"Me, too. I should've said something sooner," Haley says, looking up at him with damp eyes. "And now thanks to me, Lucas might be out of our lives for good."

Our lives?

"Wait, so, you mean you accept this?" Nathan asks.

"I didn't really mean any of those terrible things I said," Haley tells him. "I was just angry. The bottom line is, if my best friend is happy, then I'm happy. And if what makes him happy is you, who am I to stand in the way?"

This is totally not how Nathan expected this conversation would go. Not knowing what else to do, Nathan pulls her into a hug.

"I'm still here for you, okay?" Haley says, running her hand along Nathan's back.

"Thanks, Hales," Nathan says.

The ringing of Haley's phone breaks them up.

"Hello?" Haley says, snatching the phone off of her bedside table. He can hear Keith on the other end.

"What?!" Haley says, putting her hand over her mouth. He can tell something's wrong.

"What is it?" Nathan asks, but Haley motions for him to be quiet.

"He's going to make it, right?" Haley asks, sounding even more freaked out now.

Suddenly Nathan feels like someone knocked the wind out of him. Please don't like it be what he thinks…

"Okay, thanks," Haley says, hanging up the phone, her eyes wet with tears.

"Haley, what happened?!" Nathan asks again, his voice filled with panic.

"It's Lucas.. he.. he was in a bad accident," Haley says, the tears falling down her face now.

No.

This can't be happening.

"Is he gonna be okay?!" Nathan asks, jumping up from the bed.

"Th-they don't know yet; Keith said he's in surgery," Haley says in between sobs.

"Come on Haley, we need to go see him," Nathan says, grabbing his coat off the bed and heading for the door. He turns and realizes she isn't moving.

"Haley?"

"I can't."

"What do you mean you can't?" Nathan asks, getting annoyed. Lucas is hurt and they're in here wasting time.

"After what I said to him, I have no right to go see him," Haley says.

"He's your best friend Haley, and right now he needs you," Nathan tries.

"Just…," Haley says, getting up from the bed and walking to Nathan. "… you go. And call me as soon as you get an update."

"You sure about this?" Nathan asks, but Haley doesn't answer, instead she just falls into him, sobbing uncontrollably.

"I-if he dies, I'll n-never forgive myself," Haley says, crying into Nathan's chest.

"Don't you say that," Nathan says, grabbing her shoulders. "He's going to be fine, and you guys are going to be fine. I promise."

Haley pauses for a second and then nods. Nathan hugs her one last time before heading to the door.

"I'll call you, okay?" He says before running out the door to his truck.

On the way to the hospital, he's pretty sure he ran at least two stop signs. The only thing on his mind right now is Lucas. If he loses Lucas before the two of them can be together…

No, Nathan won't think that way. He's going to be okay…

… right?

He runs to the waiting room of the emergency room and finds Keith sitting with his head resting on his fists, looking pretty beat up. His face is stained with remnants of dried blood, and there's a giant gash on his forehead. If Keith looks this bad, he can't imagine what Lucas looks like.

"Keith!" Nathan yells, running up to him. Keith stands and pulls Nathan into a hug.

"I'm glad you're okay, man," Nathan says, pulling away. "Where is he?"

"In surgery; they asked us to wait here and they're going to let us know when he's in recovery."

"He's… he's gonna be alright, right?" Nathan asks, his voice cracking. "I can't… I can't lose him, Keith. I won't." The seriousness of the situation finally hit Nathan and he feels like he's going to break down right there.

Before Keith can answer, Nathan spots a doctor walking past them.

"Excuse me, were you in the operating room with Lucas Roe?" Nathan asks the doctor, who gives Nathan an inquisitive look.

"He's my… brother," Nathan says.

"He's in good hands; Dr. Hill is an excellent surgeon," The doctor tells him. "Still, your brother is lucky that your dad got him here when he did."

"You mean his uncle?" Nathan asks, confused. The doctor shakes his head no, and then he can feel Keith's hand on his shoulder.

"Dan saw the accident. He pulled Lucas out of the car, and drove us here," Keith says.

Nathan has to be imagining this. Dan Scott saved Lucas? The man with a giant black hole for a heart, who just a few months ago still acted like Lucas didn't exist?

"My dad saved him?" Nathan asks, and Keith nods in response. He can't believe it.

For once, he might hug his dad the next time he sees him.

"Keith!"

Nathan turns and sees Karen running towards the two of them, a look of pure panic on her face. Keith runs to her and pulls her into a hug.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't see the other car," Keith tells her.

"Where's the operating room? I need someone to tell me what's going on!" Karen says, scanning the room.

"He's in surgery right now; we have to wait here till he's in recovery," Nathan tells her. Suddenly she looks at him like she just now noticed that he was standing there.

"Nathan?" She says, looking at him with a puzzled expression.

"Who's here for Lucas Scott?" A female doctor asks before Nathan can answer her, walking up to them with a clipboard in hand.

"I'm his mother," Karen says, raising her hand slightly. "Is my son okay?"

"He's stable and in recovery," The doctor says.

For the first time in an hour, Nathan feels like he can breathe again.

"He needed a lot of work, though," The doctor continues, flipping through the pages of her clipboard. "His right lung collapsed and had to be repaired. I had to remove his spleen, but there shouldn't be any longterm complications with that."

"So you're saying he'll be fine?" Karen asks before Nathan can. Just tell us if he's alive, damn it!

"Well, he will need to go through physical therapy for his shoulder; it separated in the crash, but we were able to reset it. Other than that, he has a concussion and some bruising."

Jesus. It's a miracle he's even alive at this point.

"But…," The doctor begins.

Uh-oh. Buts are never good.

"… there was a complication during the surgery."

"What?" Karen asks, furrowing her eyebrows.

"Your son lost a lot of blood," She answers, "which caused his heart rate to drop. We… lost him for a seconds."

Nope, Nathan still can't breathe. He sits down in the nearest chair because his legs can't hold him up anymore.

Lucas actually died for a few seconds. If he lost him for good, Nathan doesn't know what he would do.

"Like I said though, he's stable now," The doctor continues. "All of his vitals look good, so now all we can do is wait for him to wake up."

"And when will that be?" Karen asks him.

"That's up to him," She answers. "Could be a couple of hours, or a couple of days."

"Thanks, Doc," Keith tells him. The doctor nods and walks away. Nathan sees Karen start to cry, and Keith pulls her into another hug.

He has to see Lucas, and now.

"I'm gonna go find out where he is," Nathan says, getting up from his chair and going to talk to the receptionist.

"Excuse me, could you tell me where Lucas Roe's room is?" Nathan asks the receptionist.

"Let me check….," She answers, typing on the computer in front of her. "… Lucas Roe right? Room 307."

"Thank you," Nathan says, starting into a fast walk down the hallway. He finally finds Lucas's room, but stops dead in his tracks when he reaches the doorway.

Lucas is just lying there in the hospital bed, lifeless. Nathan stands and stares at him for a few seconds before walking in the room.

"Lucas?" He tries, even if he knows he isn't getting a response. Nathan sits down in the chair next to the bed and grabs his hand.

"Hey, it's me," He says, gently squeezing Lucas's hand. "I know you can't hear me right now, but I just wanted to let you know I'm here, okay?"

He hears movement by the door and drops Lucas's hand instantly, turning to see Karen coming in.

"Sorry, I meant to come get you guys, but-" Nathan starts.

"No, it's okay," Karen says, bending down to kiss Lucas on the forehead. She pulls up a chair on the side opposite Nathan and sits down, grasping Lucas's other hand.

It's a little weird for him, being in the same room as Lucas's mom. The two of them have never really spoken to each other, especially not after learning he and Lucas are brothers. He just really isn't sure what to say.

"Hey, I'm in love with your son."

Doesn't really seem like a good conversation starter.

"I'll give you some time alone with him," Nathan says, starting to get up.

"Wait, Nathan," Karen calls after him. "It's really okay. I'm sure he'd be glad you're here."

"I don't know about that," Nathan sighs, sitting back in his chair.

"Why's that?" Karen asks him.

"Cause I've been a royal jerk to him," Nathan answers, scowling at the thought of how he's treated Lucas these past couple months.

"Well I'm sure that finding out you were brothers was just as hard on you as it was on Lucas," Karen says, smiling over at him.

If only that was the only problem.

"I just… wish I could go back and do things differently," He says. "Seeing him here like this makes me realize how little time we actually have."

"The important thing is that you're here now. He'll realize that, eventually," Karen says.

"I hope so," Nathan sighs.

He feels himself about to start crying, so he hurries and gets up before Karen can see. The last thing she needs right now is for someone else to cry.

"I'm gonna call Haley and give her an update," He says, quickly walking out of the room. Nathan dials her number and she picks up on the first ring.

"Is he okay?"

"He's gonna be fine, but they don't know how long it'll be till he wakes up," Nathan answers. He can hear a breath of relief over the phone.

"Thank god."

"Want me to come get you?"

"I can't, Nate."

"Don't you want to see him?" He asks.

"Of course, but I just can't. Not after the things I said."

"Haley, he's your best friend," Nathan says. "You need to see him." He understands where she's coming from because he feels like shit too, but Lucas would want her here.

"I will when I'm ready, okay?"

"Okay," Nathan says, sighing.

"Thanks for the update. Call me if anything else happens?"

"Of course."

He hears the line go dead, and walks back towards the room. Nathan hears that Keith is in there now, and from the sounds of things, Karen isn't too happy with him.

"Were you drinking tonight?" Karen asks Keith.

"Karen….,"

"Were you?" Karen asks again. Nathan can hear Keith sigh.

"I wasn't drunk."

"That's not what I asked you!" Karen snaps. "Were you drinking before you drove Lucas?"

"Yes, but…,"

"I trusted you," Karen interrupts, sounding angry and like she wants to cry at the same time. "I want you to leave."

Shit, Nathan needs to get away from the door before they notice he's there. He fast walks his way to the elevator, deciding he's just going home for the night. Being in there was just too hard.

Running away again. Surprise surprise.

On his way, he sees Brooke looking panicked at the receptionist counter.

"Brooke!"

"Oh my god, Nathan!" She says, running up to him. "Where is he? Is he okay?"

"He's asleep, but they think he'll be fine," Nathan tells her. "He's in room 307."

"Thank you," Brooke says. "Are you not staying?"

"No," Nathan responds, shaking his head. "It's just too hard to see him like that."

"Are you saying you actually care about him?" Brooke asks, slightly raising an eyebrow.

"Well, I mean -"

"It's okay. He told me about you two," Brooke tells him. He can feel his face getting redder by the second. "And just so you know, I'm pulling for you guys."

"Just stop being a jackass," Brooke snaps, slapping Nathan on the shoulder and walking past him.

Christ, is there anybody that doesn't know he wants to fuck his brother?

—-