Family Counseling
I entered the Room of Requirement and immediately felt the tingle of the wards. I blew out a breath of air I did not know I was holding, in relief. I trusted the Gryffindors to a small point. I only reciprocate what I am given. And they have proven that they only tolerate me two days out of the year. So, I did have my doubts about them including me in the wards.
I ignored the dirty glances and made my way to Ariana's portrait. Her long, auburn hair was flowing and so silky. The soft breeze in her painting made it look like a lazy river dancing over rocks. I caught her soft blue eyes and they began to twinkle at me. Her soft smile had my lips turning upwards to return the gesture.
"Hello girl with the pretty name." her tender voice cut through the chatter of the Room.
"Hi other girl with the pretty name." I replied softly. I winked at her and she copied my movement.
"How may I help you?" her voice was silk. My rasp of a voice made me sound like gravel compared to hers. Oh how I missed my smooth vocals.
"I need to speak to Aberforth, please." I said politely. Everything about her screamed sweet and I felt no need to ever be rude to her.
"Right this way, Henria Aislinn." she began down the path of her portrait and the door swung open.
My palms braced on the ledge and I vaulted myself up. My journey through the tunnel was a silent affair. I felt my insides flutter in anticipation. I had questions about my life and I was going to have them answered today. Because not knowing who I am will burn me from the inside out.
As I came to the end, I heard voices on the other side. The gruff voice from last Sunday could be heard questioning the soft voice. A sliver of light appeared to signal the end of my trek. I pressed my hand on the back of the portrait and the opening became wider. I slide out the entryway and was face to face with my grandfather.
"Hello granddaddy." I greeted him, my words laced with sarcasm.
"Your father lets you get away with that mouth?" Aberforth grumbled heatedly at me.
"Not usually, no. But he does pick and choose his fights with me though." I shrugged my shoulders indifferently, "Can I get a firewhiskey and then can we talk?" I stared into his twinkling blue eyes.
"You aren't old enough for firewhiskey." the grumbling reply met my ears. My temper flared in my chest.
"Actually, I am." I said sharply, "And you have no right to boss me around like I am your charge. As I remember it, I didn't even know you existed until last weekend."
"Have you no respect for your elders, young missy?" he growled at me. That only resulted in my temper rising even more.
"Only to those who don't keep secrets from me." I snapped.
"Bah! Just like your mother!" he exclaimed and a surge of pride zinged through my blood. I felt a rush of energy.
"Good. As I should be. One of the strongest women I know and I am proud to say so." my tone exuded confidence. Aberforth narrowed his eyes behind his spectacles.
"And how did your mother meet her end?" he asked with an edge.
"By trying to discover more to magic." I answered proudly, "She felt she could make a difference and tried to do her best. And if you try to tell me different, I'll blow your stupid pub into the sky and laugh maniacally at the ruins." my warning came out in a growl. Maybe I am more like him than I thought.
"Empty threats will get you nothing, girl." he turned towards the bar and procured two muggy glasses, "If you think you are more menacing than the steady stream of Death Eaters I get in my 'stupid pub', then you are more delusional than your mother." his gruff voice grated on my ears. My breathing deepened as my temper boiled close to rage.
"I'm not more menacing than Death Eaters because they work on reputation alone. I am unsuspecting and that is what makes me dangerous." I whispered deathly calm, "My tiny body and sweet face give nothing away about how bad I can fuck up your day."
"Oh? Think you can play with the big boys, do you?" his tone was mocking as he poured two glasses of firewhiskey.
"I know I can." I whispered harshly. He picked up one tumbler and left the other untouched as he took a generous gulp of the burning liquid. I stalked over and snatched up the second glass. I hesitated before I took a drink.
"The fact that a simple drink of firewhiskey gives you pause should be indication enough of your short comings." he smirked at the flushing of my cheeks.
Before I could give it another thought, I drained the harsh liquid in two gulps. The alcohol burned the whole way down. I sucked air through my teeth and made a hissing noise. Shit! That burns like a bitch!
"Now, explain to me why no one told me anything about you." I ground out through the burning sensation in my throat. Aberforth drained the rest of his drink and poured two more for us. I decided my tough act was enough and chose to sip this drink at a reasonable pace.
"That was probably your uncle's doing. He and I did not get along, so we more or less pretended the other didn't exist." Aberforth replied. He took a deep draw from the tumbler. I kept to my slower pace.
"Why?" I inquired sincerely. My grandfather glanced at Ariana's painting with a pained expression in his blue eyes. I looked at Ariana and my mind set off a bomb in my skull, "That's my aunty!" I practically yelled.
"Don't piss yerself in excitement." Aberforth hissed. I could not shake my bewilderment, "Albus was the reason your great aunt didn't grow up to be a normal witch. And that is all I will say!" his tone was cruel and spoke finality. I nodded my head.
"Fine. I won't press the issue. Today." I sipped my drink thoughtfully, "Why don't you get along with my dad?" his glass was drained again and promptly refilled.
"Your father likes to steal witches from their fathers and raise ill-mannered daughters that are disrespectful." he growled. I felt the hairs on the back of my neck raise.
"First off, I do have manners, but like I said, I only use them on people who are honest with me." I sipped again, "Second, my father was not the only factor in my mother leaving Europe. I'm sure you had a bit to do with it. Plus, do you remember that part about her being stubborn?" I asked rhetorically. No one insults my father in my face.
"Smart mouthed, just like her." he sighed heavily into his glass.
"Do you ever think that it is maybe a trait that you gave her?" I raised an eyebrow as I took a long pull from my tumbler. Aberforth stared at my blankly.
Suddenly his eyes narrowed and he set his glass on the bar top.
"You need to go!" his gruff voice was quiet. I drained my glass and moved to the portrait.
"Ariana, I need to go back." I whispered urgently. The portrait swung open quickly and I climbed into the tunnel.
I heard the pub door open as the portrait door closed. Wards. I though. My feet began to move forward as I processed my conversation. My family is so fucked up.
I got to the Room of Requirement door and hopped out. Instead of landing on my feet, I fell onto my ass. Perplexed, I blinked my eyes. But no matter how much I blinked, my eyes would not focus.
"Oh shit, I'm drunk." I muttered to myself. A few heads turned my way. I guess I did not mutter that.
"Sownbinder?" Dean's voice cut through the thickening fog of my mind.
"Seems my tolerance sucks right now. I can't hold my liquor." I said slowly. I did not want to sound like an idiot.
"As amusing as that it, why are you drunk?" Dean asked as he helped me stand.
"Family counseling." I answered with a bitter tone.
"Did it work?" he maneuvered my body through the maze of hammocks, shelves and kids.
"No. I still want to hex him." I grumbled. I took a glance at my surroundings, "Oh! Hey, don't leave the Room. I can get to the Common Room by myself. Thank you, Dean." I reached up on my toes and placed a light kiss on his cheek.
"Be careful, Sownbinder." he quickly backed away from me. Score one for Henny Penny.
I slowly walked the halls and corridors. I realize I should not have drunk that much firewhiskey that fast, but I have wanted to feel free for so long now. For once I am not thinking about Death Eaters. For once I am not contemplating my next move. I was only concentrating on putting one foot in front of the other.
Until I walked into a wall. A wall with really shiny shoes.
"Henria, why do you smell like a pub?" a very familiar drawl pulled me from the fog.
"That is what I was aiming for." I replied slowly.
"How much did you have?" Draco inquired as he put an arm around my waist and started leading me away.
"Two glasses. Of firewhiskey." I replied, "I drank them too fast."
"Apparently." he drawled. I noticed we were walking.
"Where are we going?" I needed some water.
"To the Head's dorm. Pansy is in the Slytherin Common Room, so she won't notice me sneak you in. You shouldn't go around the school drunk." I heard the scolding, but chose to ignore it.
"Why not Gryffindor Tower?" I stumbled, but Draco's arm kept me upright.
"Feeding an intoxicated snake to the lions is not very sporting." he replied as his arm pulled me closer to him. My lips started to go numb. No, my whole face was going numb. I touched my cheek and cursed under my breath. I really needed to work on this tolerance thing.
"It is just as well, I don't feel much like going there." I worked around the loss of my lips. I licked them to try and feel something, "We haven't been getting along. In truth, I have not been getting along with anyone at this school." I mumbled.
"Oh, I know. It took us months to get to where we are. And you normally ignore me in favor of talking to the do gooders." he said with a smirk in his voice, "I don't like to share my toys, y'know." my stomach was filled with butterflies. But the comparison of being an object was not lost on me. I think. Because being told that he did not want to share me was doing funny things to my thoughts.
"I'm a toy?" I asked with a giggle. Giggle? What the hell, Henria?! Draco chuckled.
"No. You would be the most awful toy. You don't listen to a thing anyone says and you have this terrible habit of annoying the shit out of people." he replied as he stopped walking. I felt his body leave mine so he could step to the entrance of the Head dorms. I felt myself swaying. It felt like dancing.
A quick mumble and the door began opening. I caught the sight of the neutral tones that I loved so much. Draco extended a hand to me and I placed my small hand in his warm one and was pulled into the comfort of the Common Room. I hoped my lips pulled themselves into a smile. I felt my shoulders relax. I really loved this room. It hugged me and held me like a best friend would.
"Miss this?" Draco interrupted my hazy musings. A small smile was turning his features soft. I nodded my head. I really did miss it.
"It is like a warm hug." I slurred slightly. Stupid numb lips. My nose was also numb now.
"Come on. I'll get you resting in my bed. You can sleep it off there." he tugged on my hand gently. I took one more look around as I followed him to his door.
Draco opened the door to green and silver. I smirked at this. He was a Slytherin through and through. That thought should have made me nervous, but I could not find it in myself to worry over it. Mainly because I wanted to keep this light feeling for as long as I could. I loved not being able to feel any of the heavy thoughts I knew I would be facing once my mind returned from the fog. Just for right now, though, I wanted to pretend like I was a teenager going to school. I wanted to be what I really was.
"The decor could do with a change, but I like your room. Looks familiar though..." I commented with a knowing smile. Draco snorted lightly. I was happy to note that I was just as funny drunk as I was sober.
"Go lay down, silly girl." he said softly. I took off my sweater and jeans. My skin was hit with cool air and it made my head spin a little.
I placed my clothing on the chair at his desk and took a stroll around his room. I could feel his eyes watching me, but I paid no mind to them. I was browsing through his room, quietly and slowly. I was not ready to lie down. Was it bad that I wanted to stay as intoxicated as long as I could? Did it make me a horrible person that I did not want to think? I lightly fingered the spines of his books as I passed the bookcase. Could I not afford this one time to be an irresponsible teenager?
"I'm tired." I murmured as I peered out the window. I pressed my fingertips lightly on the panes as I looked over the grounds. I glanced at the fading light on the Black Lake. How long did Aberforth and I talk?
"Go to sleep then." Draco replied simply. I shook my head and turned to him. My back could feel the cool air coming off the frosting glass.
"No, not that kind of tired. I am tired of being an adult. I am tired of trying to stay one step ahead of the game. I am tired of people relying on me and also pushing me around. Can I not just be a teen girl trying to get through school?" a shiver ran through my body as my back connected with the cooled glass. The cold vanished some of the fog and my mind felt clearer.
"I have a feeling a lot of us are feeling like that. Most of us here were not afforded the childhood we all deserve." he responded bitterly. I swallowed hard. My heart hurt knowing he was talking about the impending doom that would be falling on us soon.
"Draco..." I could not think of a damn thing to say to that. He had not moved since entering the room. I sighed and stepped from the window.
My feet brought me to the silk covered bed. I lay down slowly on top of the comforter and focused on the ceiling. My hands occupied themselves by nervously playing with my fingers. I felt lonely. I realized that since Kadie had left, everyone left me be. I managed one hug out of Seamus. And I did give Neville a quick squeeze once. The most contact I had had was with Draco last Saturday in the Astronomy Tower. My throat constricted and my chest gave a painful twinge.
"Draco..." I trailed off again, my muddled thoughts were painful.
"Yes?"
"Will you lay down with me?" I asked quietly. I had tried to keep the pain out of my voice, but failed. Quiet fell between us. I almost thought he would not.
"Of course." he finally whispered.
I heard him rustle around the room. I did not stop looking up at the ceiling. I blinked when he doused the torches and my body jostled slightly as he climbed onto the mattress. The quiet that was between us was comfortable. It was not strained or stressful. We lay side by side, staring at the ceiling. This is what all of us should be able to do. Lie in bed and not have a thing to worry about except if our crush liked us. Or if we really failed the last test. Life is not fair.
Without a word, I scooted over and rolled into his side. My head gently lay on his chest and my arm went crossed his stomach. I felt an arm wrap itself around my shoulders and rest on my ribcage. The rustling I had heard earlier was him stripping to his undershorts. The feel of skin to skin was soothing. I felt my chest tighten and my eyes sting. It may have been soothing, but it reminded me that I was alone here in the castle.
A quiet sob ripped through my throat and I felt the tears begin to fall. I clung tighter to Draco to chase them away, but it did not work. His arm pulled me closer to his chest. The room swallowed my quiet sobs as I wept into Draco's chest. I wept for our ruined childhoods. I wept for our tired bodies and minds. And I wept for the cruel reality that we would have to face. A battle.