Prompt: Thanksgiving
Author: Erik and Lotus
Summary: In which the course of the day is documented in a series of conversations.
Disclaimer: We do not own Saiyuki or DGM
Apologies for how late this is. I (Lotus) only just realized that I'd never posted this chapter.
Thanksgiving
"Where the fuck is the fucking cranberry shit?" Kanda snapped.
"How should I know?!" Gojyo exclaimed.
"I've got it!" Lenalee called.
"Can I eat it now?" Goku whined.
"No, it goes with dinner." Bookman said.
"Please Goku, go wait with Allen." Hakkai sighed, pointing towards the cafeteria where Allen could be seen.
"Hey, what'cha' doin'? I got kicked out of the kitchen." Goku asked as he walked into the cafeteria.
"Oh, then could you help me put tablecloths on the tables?" Allen requested, glancing up at his fellow black hole.
"Sure!" Goku said as he ran over to help.
"What do I do with this?" Kanda holds up the turkey by its legs, the head and neck and guts fall from inside and all over his boots. "Shit!"
"Cook it, I would presume." Hakkai said with a condescending smile.
"How!" Kanda said exasperatedly.
"Oh, I'm not sure. Let me look it up in the recipe book." Hakkai walks away leaving Kanda holding the bird, still dripping juices onto his shoes.
"God damnit." Kanda grumbled.
"Put it in the sink, Yuu," Lavi said dragging a trash can over to the man. "And then you can clean the guts off the floor."
"Fuck you," Kanda said, shoving the turkey into Lavi's arms instead of putting it in the sink.
"Pie filling coming through! Ack-" Gojyo spilled the liquid pumpkin pie all over the front of Kanda as he slipped on one of the gizzard packages that had been missed after Kanda spilled turkey guts everywhere.
"Fuck!" Kanda shouted as the cool, wet goop coated him. He wiped the pumpkin out of his eyes, flinging the liquid onto the floor. Gritting his teeth and glaring at Gojyo he growled, "Gojyo..."
Before the other was allowed to respond, Kanda cornered him against the counter and used the man's ever-present wife beater to wipe the rest of his face off.
"Sonuva' bitch!" Gojyo said pulling his now pie covered shirt down. "You missed a spot," he said in a more sultry tone as he licked some of the pie from the corner of Kanda's mouth.
"You got pumpkin pie in my ha-" Gojyo kissed Kanda, effectively silencing his complaint.
Komui and Lenalee walked in carrying stuffing and potatoes to be cooked. They paused for a second before ignoring the two men making out in favor of putting their bags on the flour covered counter. As they walked out to get more bags Komui said," Stop making out and get back to work. You'll have to get more pumpkin. Allen and Goku were really looking forward to that pie."
As the two pulled away, Gojyo blushed a little and sheepishly said, "I could still have pie."
Kanda shot him a glare before turning on his heel to go change, whipping Gojyo in the face with his pumpkin coated ponytail.
"If I were condensed milk, where would I be...?" Gojyo mutter as he strolled through the grocery store.
"The hell if I know," Kanda snapped, glaring at the swooning women that watched them as they moved through the store.
"Did you get the pumpkin stuff?"
"Yes I've got the vomit inducing pulp," Kanda gripped. "Why those two human black holes can't settle for apple pie is beyond me."
"Hell if I know." Gojyo finally located the condensed milk. "Alright, let's get out of here before one of those ladies over there decides to take you home," he teased.
"Only me?" Kanda shot back. "They've been eyeing your ass twice as much as mine."
"That's 'cause I've got a nice ass, now let's go!"
"Look, I can make it dance," Lavi cheered, making Hakkai look over to see the one-eyed redhead parading the turkey around the counter by its wings.
"Lavi," Hakkai sighed, the exasperation apparent. "Put the poor bird down and come help me with the rolls."
"Fine, party-pooper," Lavi grumbled, putting the turkey back in its pan and skipping over to Hakkai, his grumblings waylaid by his smile. He picked up a roll fresh out of the oven. "Hot! Hot! Hot!" Lavi exclaimed, juggling the roll until it cooled enough to hold without burning his fingers.
"Well I'd hope so," Hakkai said, trying not to laugh at Lavi's expense.
"Hey Monkey! Quit hogging all the damn sweet potatoes!" Gojyo yelled from two seats down.
"Why don't you come down and get 'em you lazy cockroach!" Goku hollered back.
A resounding crack was heard as Sanzo's fan found Goku's skull. "Shut up. And pass. The food!" Sanzo growled as Lavi took the potatoes from Goku.
"Kanda, why aren't you eating anything?" Lenalee asked.
"I don't know how..." Kanda muttered, staring down at the full plate before him.
"Well first you put it on your fork, then you stick it in your mouth, after that you're on your own," Gojyo replied with a demonstration.
Kanda shot him a glare before picking up his fork awkwardly. He held it like he would chop sticks and tried to stab a piece of turkey only for the fork to fall from his fingers and clatter against his plate loudly, gathering the attention of everyone there. He ducked his head, glaring at the white tablecloth as embarrassment stained his face bright red.
Gojyo stabbed the piece of turkey and held it in front of Kanda.
Kanda grumbled a quiet thanks and bit the turkey off the fork. He refused to look back up even as conversations started again and everyone stopped paying him any attention.
"Okay, here's the pie, so you all better damn well enjoy it," Gojyo said as he set down the giant pie plate.
Allen's face lit up with unadulterated joy and no one bothered trying to get the youth to remain seated as he jumped up to get some pie, Goku hot on his heels.
"Hey, hey, hey! Let me get out of the way first!" Gojyo yelped as he was almost trampled.
Lenalee giggles quietly as she carried out the apple pie, placing it on the other end of the table.
"Who wants ice cream?" Komui crowed, dancing into the room like the loon that he was and clutching a large container of vanilla ice cream.
Gojyo got a slice of pie and a nice large scoop of vanilla ice cream. As he ate it, he kept making suggestive glances at Kanda.
Kanda shot Gojyo a glare, trying to ignore the ice cream that was dripping down the man's spoon.
Hakkai coughed to break up the glance between the two of them.
Everyone passed out in one of the sitting rooms, fast asleep in food comas.
Please review! (Hopefully we'll get at least one chapter of UE up tonight. *prays*)