Disclaimer: no, I don't own twilight and yes I hate Edward...

All hail Jacob! Team Jacob all the way...

This chapter is dedicated to jacobfan216, connect2tjb,zdra8351,jul5857,IDTwilight,voidless dream,sissam93,IdaAreIda,AriesFireQn,Pegasus12654, foxitrue,Angelic95,Passion Black,I LUV SETH and my dearest loveable beta Blessedly Twilighted.. muaxx love ya. i would like to wish u to get well and healthy soon . btw get some tissue people this chapter is gona be full of argument and tears.

bella's pov : a lost lover, a lost sun

I didn't waste time heading towards the Cullen's mansion, although it was quite uneasy to drive with my rather large baby bump. The road towards their house was different, not that the road changed or anything it just felt different. It was as if something inside of me was tugging at the depth of me pulling and pulling with as much force as it could muster to get me to turn back to La Push.

"Oh god Sam's story is getting to my head . That isn't good!"

Since I have been living with Emily I got use to Sam's stories or the "Quileute legends". Well Billy use to tell those legends back when I was a kid, speaking of Billy I haven't seen him in a while. Whenever Jake brings me back to his place, Billy usually is out it's as if he's avoiding me seeing Billy. Strange.

The drive to the Cullens' was much longer than usual. I climbed out of the truck as quickly as my swollen belly would allow and ran towards the house holding my stomach. I was shocked to see that the place was a mess, it was as if a bomb exploded or something . But the guys just said, it was a small talk.. This looks like a battlefield to me.. Oh god Edward? I hope he is ok, no wait.. He has to be ok.

"Edward?" I called to him but received no reply.

"Edward"

I called out his name repeatedly and continued to call Alice's name too. But nothing could be heard, not a single damn sound. They don't leave the house like this and just go out, well actually they have never gone anywhere like this .. Except when Edward left me…

Oh lord! No.. No This could not be happening again. They couldn't have left me again. Not after they knew how much it would hurt me! They didn't even say good bye. Why the rush to leave? Wait a minute…

Flashback

"Did the Cullen's come here?" I asked hoping they did.

"No they didn't. Well actually, they can't." Emily said looking at me.

"What do you mean they can't?" I asked in surprise.

"Well this is our territory, they aren't allowed to come after what happened."

End of flashback

Jake.. Why? Why do you have crush my happiness? It was all so perfect, his family, the pack, both Jacob and Edward.. For once everything seemed to be in place. No fighting, No disturbances. Both sides accepting each other . It was all a dream come true but he just had to send it to ruins. I didn't want to choose between the sides, both of them are my family. I love them both.

What if they don't comeback this time?

That question kept haunting me god knows for how long. As soon I came back to my senses, I knew what I had to do.

I jumped into the rabbit full of anger. I have to do this now. It's the only way that would make him understand. He did it once when he left the bike in front of the Charlie to get me grounded. And now this so that he could have me all to himself.

Well, he is certainly getting what he deserves. Truly his new friends are a bad influence on him and he claims that the Cullens are bad. He embarrassed me, by taking away my rights. By taking away my choice. Who is he to say I can't meet them anymore? Just because I'm having his baby doesn't give him the right to take control over my actions. I wouldn't even have this baby if it weren't for Edward who forced me to proceed with the pregnancy. He is supposed to be thankful to Edward not try to kill him. Ungrateful jerk!

(Emily's house)

As soon as I arrived at Emily's house, I parked the rabbit and hurried to meet Jake and give him a piece of my mind. But luck was truly on my side, I saw Jacob waving at me with a smile on his face. That jerk UGH!

I heard him call out my name.

"Stop it!" I shouted at him.I guess I failed to control my anger.

"What?" he asked dumbfound.

That is not going to work this time."Don't call me like that. You don't deserve it." I growled.

"Huh? Bella what happened? Why are you talking like this ?" Jake said softly.

"Don't play dumb Jake, I know you broke the treaty! I know you hurt him! Why? You know I love him, how could you do this to me?" I went straight to the point not wasting the long chat.

"Bella I did what was best for us." Jake said tone serious.

"Best for us? Best for you more precisely. You think I want you to hurt him? In what way is hurting him best for us? Tell me Jacob."Best for you is more accurate, with Edward out of the way. I need to depend on you all the time. Nice plan, former-best friend.

"Bella he could have killed both you and the baby! What do you expect me to do? Sit around and watch him doing whatever he likes like an idiot?" Jacob said raising his voice.

How dare he! He is the guilty party and he's acting innocent!"He could have killed me? But did he? Did he?" I repeated myself over and over. To justify Edward's actions.

He kept silent.

"He didn't because he knows what is best for me. Selfish. Just because im having your child doesn't mean you have control over me. Even Charlie doesn't have control over me. What makes you think you are?" I shouted. "What happened over there was an accident, he didn't do it on purpose. It's not even his fault and you hurt him, you could have killed him! I love him with all my heart Jacob, you know that."

I was about break down when I thought of Edward in pain..

"Bella please listen to what I have to say!" Jacob plead softly taking a step closer to me.

"Why Jake? …. It's clear that you hate Edward and want rid of him. You know what? Mission accomplished. They are gone! This time they didn't even get to say good bye to me because of your stupid treaty rules. I loved them Jacob. I loved Alice, Esme, Emmet all of them! I love Edward." I said as the tears traveled down my face.

I backed away several steps not wanting him anywhere near me. I don't want have a life with someone who has the intention to kill the love of my life.

"I told you billions of times before that they are my family. I need them alive Do you want me to go back to being a zombie again? Is that what you want Jacob?" I said scrubbing at the tears that kept stubbornly streaming down my face.

"Bella you have us. We are family too!" Seth said walking a step closer to me.

That's when I realized that Jake and I weren't alone. Everyone was here, the pack, Sam, Emily and not to mention Leah surprisingly.

"You guys are family, but you are just different." I tried. Paul cut in before I was able to finish.

"Different? Hell yeah we are different! We don't drink blood, we don't try to suck the life out of others." He shouted obviously angry. I was about to say that I needed both sides.

"Paul.. Please" Jake plead.

"No Jake somebody needs to teach her a lesson okay. Cause frankly I have had enough of her BS! Who does she think she is? " Paul shouted at Jacob.

How am I suddenly the bad guy?

"Look here vampire girl, listen to what he has to say, he is trying to keep you alive and you just keep pushing him away." Paul demanded.

Vampire girl? Trying to keep me alive? Hell no."I don't take advice from others" I snapped.

"Oh why you little…" Paul snarled.

"Paul! Shut up! Get out of here!" Jake shouted in fury.

"Jake, control your anger. You don't want to fight now." Sam calmly ordered.

"Jake As much I would like to disagree with that idiot, but unfortunately he's right. She is trying to walk all over you!" Leah ground out.

What the hell is wrong with all of them?

"Shut UP Leah!" Jared said threateningly.

"Shut it doorknob! What I was trying to say was stop being so damn stubborn! He's just trying to help you. You are supposed to say thank you not argue with him about going into the arms of danger! How dumb could you be? It's so obvious that you will just get hurt if you keep opening your arms up to the bloodsucker." Leah said to me.

"Edward will never hurt me!" I shouted.

How many times do I have to repeat myself?

"Yeah right.. Then explain why the baby doesn't get to have a normal life?" Leah snarled.

My heart stopped beating for a second.

"Leah!" The pack growled in unison.

"What? How did you know that?" I was could have told her? Sue and Jake weren't in the house and Emily couldn't have told her.

"Oh shut it guys, she's going to know any way! The guys eavesdropped over the conversation.. So what?" Leah said as if it were nothing.

"Doesn't that prove, he hurt you and the baby? Doesn't that mean Jake had the right to kill him!" Leah said backing up Jake.

"No! It does not! Not even if the baby died would he be able to have the right to kill Edward! No one has that right!" I blurted."I love Edward, yes I'll admit I do love Jacob as well but I love Edward more. All I ever wanted was to be with Edward. I know he loves me! Edward would never think of trying to hurt me!"

"Yeah he truly does. That explains why he left you?" Leah laughed.

"He left me because he didn't want me to get hurt. He wanted me to move on and have a normal life. It's not like what you thought." I told them the truth on why Edward left the first time.

"Bella you did move on. Why do you insist you still want him?" Seth asked softly.

"You won't understand. Nobody can understand. I need Edward like I need the air to breathe. Jake well, He's, he's." I started trying to unjumble the words to get them to come out correctly.

"A replacement? A consolation prize? A puppet? An idiot who puts you back together when another guy leaves you? Is that what he is to you?" Leah shouted.

"No! Jake would never be that." I shook my head in surprise.

"Yeah? Then what is he to you?" Leah asked intently.

"He's, He, well he's my best friend." I stuttered out.

"Really? I didn't know that best friends have sex with each other!" Leah shot.

Suddenly my chest became heavy and it gave me difficulty breathing. I tried to answer her but was unable.

"Leah! That's it! Guys get the hell out of this! This is my problem I'll settle it myself. I don't need any one of you to complicate it more!" Jake shouted coming out of the clearance with Paul and Sam.

I didn't realize they had even left.

"Oh so now it's down to this. You kick us out for her? Jake what the hell did she do? You're going to let her treat you like crap?" Embry said defeated.

"Dude we were just trying to help" Quil said calmly.

"I don't need help." Jake said sharply.

"But Jake." Seth tried.

"No Seth, everyone just leave. Please" Jake said shaking his head.

"Bella, honey if you think that I'm the one at fault then I'm sorry. Im sorry for being a jerk. I love you so much and it doesn't help when your safety is concerned. When there's a possibility of you being in danger I can't think. Hell I can't even breathe! I just lost myself when I thought I lost you and the baby! Please forgive me?" Jake asked hoarsely.

"Shut up Jake I don't want to hear anything you have to say! I've heard enough. Im leaving! Don't you dare come to forks and don't even think of calling." I said turning my back to him.

I can't accept him into my life again not after what he did.

"Bella! No wait." Jake said, gripping my hand.

"Let go of my hand." I said with my back to him.

I didn't want to see him.

"Bella I said I'm sorry and in your condition you shouldn't drive!" Jake said in an attempt to get me to stay.

"Sorry Jake? Is sorry going to bring them all back? Is a sorry going to undo all of your mistakes? You put me in this condition! I didn't ask you to knock me up! I was supposed to have a child with Edward not you!" I snarl blurted.

"But Bella, you said." Jacob said with his well of tears threatening to fall.

"Yes Jake I gave myself to you. But I told you that if it weren't for Edward's departure I wouldn't have moved on. I tried to move on but it just made Edward suicidal.. I couldn't let him kill himself. I lost my virginity to you that day, on that I day I thought I could have moved on and had a life with you, my personal sun, my best friend. Unfortunately I was wrong. When I was in a bad way after Edward left me you raised me up from the brink of death. I was thankful and grateful to have someone like you in my life but now I know that you aren't the same person I once knew and loved. You wanted to get rid of him so that I would come to you begging to make me better. No Jake that's not going to happen again. I'm sorry Jake, but it's over. They are not coming back so neither am I!" I whispered.

What I said was harsh but Jacob needed to know. As soon as I was done he relinquished his hold on my hand, I waited for him to speak but he uttered nothing. This was it, the end

I got into the car with teary eyes, and left. I felt my heart tear apart then. The invisible lines of mine that were connected to Jacob were ripped to pieces. I started to feel more and more empty inside the farther I went. I know I must have hurt Jacob, but I could never forgive him for what he has done. Why did he do it? Why Jacob? Why? I thought I could depend on you! I thought you were my safe harbor! I thought you would give me support! Instead you gave me nothing but hurt.

As soon I arrived home, I parked the rabbit beside Charlie's cruiser and ran into the house. I didn't knock on the door or reply when Charlie asked me why the rush? I just lost both of them today. The love of my life and the father of my child. One I left, and the other left me.