Anna deals with her feelings for Chuck in her own unique way. However, the closer she gets to him, the more glaring his odd behavior becomes.
CHUCK VS. THE MONKEY PANTS
Chapter 6
How strange it is, to be having this conversation. This is a man I used to be in love with not too long ago. I normally didn't talk to Morgan outside of work-related situations. He was thoroughly surprised when I called him last night.
Or, so I thought.
"I knew it!" He practically shouts and points a finger at me. "You miss me don't you? It's so obvious."
Unbelievable. It takes a lot of my self-control to not shake him.
"Maybe. Whatever you think about me, I really cared about you."
Morgan's head drops and he looks like a lost kid. I suddenly feel a little sorry for him. "Anna, I actually regret what I did to be honest with you," he says.
"Well, you can make it up to me. If you really mean that."
"Of course, I mean it. I feel awful about the whole thing. So what do you want me to do?"
"Well, when I said that I liked Chuck, I meant that I really like Chuck," I say and then I wait for my words to sink in.
"Oh. OOOOH!" Morgan says, a look of shock appearing over his face. He says nothing for a while, but I can see the wheels turning.
"The problem is that he would never make a move because of you. So you have to let him know that it's okay. You have to give him your blessing – so to speak."
"It was the magic hands, wasn't it? I thought that there was something going on."
"We've become good friends. That's all. He just sees me as a friend," I tell him. "But a little push might help him think differently."
"So tell me does it taste as good as you imagined it?"
"Does what taste as good?"
"Revenge. This sweet little revenge plot you got going here. It certainly looks good on you. Are your skirts getting shorter or is it me?"
"Morgan—"
"Do you really want hurt me? Do you really want to make me cry?"
"This is not about hurting you."
"And why would I do this for you?"
"Because the one person you care about more than yourself is Chuck. And maybe Ellie, but that's a whole other topic," I say, rolling my eyes.
"You really care about him?"
"I've spent months since I came back from England trying to ignore it and it won't go away. So yes, I really do care about him."
"Well, then. You know I never could say no to those adorable brown eyes of yours."
I feel hopeful. I am about to get what I want. Something nags at me though. It should not be this easy, right? And old fear was now confirmed: Morgan never felt the same way I did about him. If he had protested, it would have made everything more difficult but I would know I wasn't so easily forgotten, or replaced.
It's just clear evidence of why I broke up with him.
"I will consider granting your wish," he continues. "…If you will grant me a couple of my own."
"Okay," I said suspiciously. "Shoot."
"One, we will have to be friends again."
Ugh! Really? I'm already getting a headache thinking about it.
"What else?"
"Second, be good to my buddy. He's in a delicate condition since the Sarah break-up. I really don't have to tell you that because you're good at that stuff – taking care of people. You did a good job with me. I was basically stupid. And maybe one day you'll forgive me."
"Maybe, one day. So we're friends again and I'll be there for Chuck.
"Yep."
"Perfectly doable."
…As was a certain tall, dark-haired boy I know. I smile triumphantly as we shake hands in agreement.
….
Lined up, waiting, we pretend to listen to Big Mike while he's having another one of his classic rants.
"So now Bartowski is taking time off. The rest of you better not get any ideas. And I expect everyone to help this place run smoothly in Bartowski's absence. I don't want any of what happened to Anna's replacement to happen again. Is that clear?"
A few weeks after my talk with Morgan, Chuck, to the surprise of everyone, decided to go out of town. He even spent his birthday out of town. He got a gig teaching a computer course at some retreat-slash-ranch in Hornbrook, CA. It sounded wacky. But I checked out their website and it seemed legit.
Big Mike wasn't the only one who was unhappy about Chuck leaving on what he called "a personal journey through education." It was horrible timing for me being that I had just asked Morgan (to prove my personal growth I'm now calling him by his given name) to talk to him. But as sad as I was, I was nothing compared to Morgan who was downright catatonic. I couldn't count on him to talk to Chuck until he returned from his trip.
….
Date: 17 October 2008
From: "Anna" linuxgirl
To: "Chuck" CIBartowski
Subject: Re: Hello there
What have you done to me? You're trying to get back at me for leaving you alone with Lester and Jeff, right? Morgan has reattached himself to me like some leech on my ass, but significantly more suck-y. In fact, if you see an old bitter woman behind the Nerd Herd desk – well that's me A.M. – After Morgan. Oh and his little girlfriend is along for the ride. What the hell did I do to deserve this!
Okay, that was my little rant. So the guy that the temp agency sent over to replace you is such an effin' weirdo. Lester ignores him and has appointed himself our leader. I'm sure you can guess how well that's going.
If you can't tell by now, you are missed. But, go on! Enjoy yourself. Don't worry about me. My suffering will be worth it Charles.
….
I STILL haven't gotten over the beard. If you hadn't sent me the picture I would not have believed it. And now you're working out with a trainer?! Has Chuck and the phrase "working out" ever been used in a sentence together? Just yesterday you were a naive little Buy More manager and today you're on a ranch finding yourself...or whatever. Good for you. Just don't change too much or I will kick your ass. I kind of liked Chuck the way he was. You know, uh, I mean we all do.
Okay, later Nerd King,
Anna
….
Vince is hot, talented and completely boring. It seems that he doesn't have much to say beyond the subject of music. His brown eyes and sexy lips make me physically alert but I am mentally daydreaming.
Karen elbows my arm, knocking it off the armrest.
"What's wrong?" she whispers.
She talked me into doing this double date with her and Ryan. It is her fault that I'm in this movie theater being softly killed with dullness.
"Oh. Nothing," I say, not hiding my annoyance.
"Just relax and enjoy yourself."
"I feel guilty. I don't want to be here."
"Guilty about what? You can't cheat on a guy that you were never with!"
She's right but damn her and her rightness. In response, my attitude-level goes from 7 to 20.
The movie theater is starting to fill up and as Vince continues to talk about his band and how they compare to the other bands in the area, my mind wanders.
Chuck and I in the home theater room...No, the stockroom. I take off that gray tie, untuck his shirt from his waistband, unbutton his pants...
...Vince is asking me something...
"I'm sorry. What did you say?" I ask him.
"What band would you say is most culturally relevant?" He asks me.
"Milli Vanilli?" I say. "Just kidding. Everyone says The Beatles, but I think for our generation there's not just one band that can take that much credit," I add before he hyperventilates.
Karen needs a diet coke refill and I need to use the bathroom before the previews start. Later, I sit on a bench in the hallway, waiting for her. Suddenly, I'm nearly pushed to the floor as some blond chick lands head first into my lap. My iPhone goes flying and when I look up I realize that I know this "blonde chick."
"Sarah?" I ask, completely surprised.
She gets up and manages to look graceful doing it. Only she could achieve this.
"Anna. Sorry! I was trying to catch an old friend and I must have tripped," she says, while looking past me.
"Sweetie, that's not how a lap dance works," I say jokingly.
"Sure. Can you excuse me?" And she is off to catch her friend, I assume.
I don't have time to digest how weird that was before Chuck comes running by. In a reaction delay,c he runs past me, then turns and runs back.
"What are you doing here?" We say at the same time.
"Did you see where Sarah went?" He asks urgently, before I can say anything else.
I point down the long, dark hallway.
"Thanks. I'm so sorry. Can you excuse me?" Then he runs off after Sarah and her friend, I assume.
"Jeez. Do I offend?" I think to myself as I bend to pick up my battered phone.
Then all hell breaks loose. The fire alarms start going off and smoke begins to fill the hallway. It's chaos. Employees are yelling at us to evacuate the building. People are spilling out into the hallway from the theaters in a panic. Karen hasn't come back and I can't get to Vince and Ryan. I stand up to follow everyone when I hear my name being called. I turn to see Chuck and Sarah coming towards me.
"You need to follow us," Chuck tells me.
They lead me into one of the empty movie theaters, down the aisle and through a door under the screen. Behind the door is a maze of turns and unfinished construction.
"Where are we going?" I ask.
"There's a way out," Chuck says.
"I came with my friends. I don't know where they are."
"They will be fine," Sarah says reassuringly. "We just need to get out, okay?"
Finally, Chuck finds a security door and we walk out of the building and into the night air. I finally let out the breath I had been holding the whole time.
I call Karen and luckily she is with Ryan and Vince and they are all okay. Sarah comes over just as I end the call.
"You okay?" She asks me.
"Yes. Thanks," I say. I know that she's my competition, or she would be if there was an actual competition taking place, but I can't deny that she is gorgeous. Why wouldn't Chuck still be in love with her?
She starts apologizing for earlier.
"That friend, she stole some...things from me. Very important things," Sarah explains.
"Did you catch her?"
"No, unfortunately."
"Well, I have contacts if you need some help with that."
"No. I'm pretty set," she says, then becomes serious. "You know, you can't fool me."
"Fool you about what?"
"I know. I see how you look at him, your body language, everything."
"By "him" you mean..."
"Chuck. I mean Chuck."
"Oh," I say lamely. This is getting interesting.
"He's just keeping me company tonight. We're not together."
"Really?"
"Yes."
"Why are you telling me this?" I ask in total confusion.
"I'm not sure. But I am sure that I want him to be happy."
Before I can get any more details Chuck comes over.
"I'm so sorry for earlier. It's just that—"
"Don't worry about it. Sarah explained it to me," I say.
"I need to go make a call," Sarah says and walks away.
This is my first time seeing Chuck since he got back from his trip. I try not to be too obvious as I visually stalk him. There's something different about him. He seems more confident, more self-assured. I noticed it earlier as we were getting out of the building.
"I thought you weren't coming back until Sunday?"
"Change of plans. I'm sorry I didn't get a chance to call you."
"It was a shock to see you and Sarah, here. No more beard?"
"Yeah, that was a temporary thing...The beard, I mean. Sarah and I...we're still friends. Just friends."
"Okay."
"You look good."
"Thanks. I was kind of on a date...with Vince."
"I really missed you," he says, talking over my date confession.
"Really?" I saw genuinely surprised.
The surprises just keep on coming for me tonight. I stand with a calm front, but I'm freaking out inside.
"Me too."