Who dyed Kurt in chapter one?

It was... Professor X?

"Indeed." the Professor answered. "Everyone was ignoring me. I thought that if I staged the beginning of a prank war between Kurt and whoever he decided to blame for it, would eventually cause someone to come visit me. Even if they only came for help in stopping the madness I started."

In the end, the Professor's plan worked. Well, for the most part.

----$---$---

"KURT!" Evan yelled. "What did you do to my skateboard."

"REVENGE!" replied Kurt, "You were the one who caused the madness the day before yesterday! That dye still hasn't come out of my fur!"

"Is he the one who maliciously dyed my hair pink yesterday?!" shouted Rouge. "Ah don't remember what happened, but if he did it to Kurt, then he probably did it to me, too!"

"Actually," began Jean, before Kurt stopped her by putting a hand over her mouth.

"It must have been Evan." said Kurt, while Jean was spitting out blackish tinged fur.

"Let's get 'im!" said Rouge.

"Charge!" Kurt yelled.

Everyone began to chase Evan around the house, loudly.

--a few hours later-

Logan, who had been watching the chase for the last half hour or so, was impressed at the endurance his students were displaying.

Then, the Brotherhood popped up. (Hah! I spelled it right this time!) Pierre, just to be spiteful, tripped Evan, causing a large domino effect that amused the Brotherhood greatly. Then Kitty came back from wherever she had been the last 24 hours, and decided to test out a new theory of hers.

"Hmmm... by using Rouge and Jean as conduits, I may be able to cause the entire population of Bayville to go on a shopping spree!" She declared, and proceeded to do that immediately.

You see, Kitty had been away at villain training school. There, before she was kicked out for being too single-minded about shopping, she learned to plan using the abilities of those around her, she also became chess champion of the world, but that won't come into play until later.

BANG! Went the air around the trio, as it combusted. Everyone in the room was struck by conflicting thoughts. Kitty hadn't learned how to subvert other's influence in her mind controlling yet. They all wanted to go shopping, but they couldn't decide where they wanted to go. Should they go to GAP, Hot Topic, or JCPennys. Everyone was horribly confused.

Then, the professor came into the room and yelled mentally 'Everybody STOP!'

"No one's asked me for help yet. Why is that?" said the professor. "You should know by now what happens when nobody talks to me."

"YOU!" said Kurt. "It was you!"

"I was going to say who'd done everything, but no, no one ever listens to me," pouted Jean.

"Sorry Jean." apologized Scott, using the chance to touch his near life-long obsession.

Now, despite the professor's attempts to avert it, Kitty's mind control set up was beginning to show itself in the students.

"Ah wanna go to Limited Too!" said Rogue, "Wait a second... NO! I want to go to Hot Topic! Kitty! Get your hands off of me! ...And keep them off!"

Kitty just smiled innocently, and began planning ways to manipulate her pawns so that they could take down Magneto so that she could have Lance as a boy-toy and spend more time shopping.

Everyone else really couldn't resist, so they all loaded up to go to the mall. When they got there, the boys were having trouble with their sudden urge to buy girls clothing and then show it off to all of their friends while bragging about the deal they got on it.

"Okay guys," said Evan to the males huddled together "We need to come up with a plan. How do we subvert these new thoughts? None of us think this way normally, well, except for Pietro and Scott. Speaking of which, why is the Brotherhood still here?"

"No idea." said Kitty's future boy-toy a.k.a. Lance.

"Well then," said Kurt, "Why don't we just go shopping at a gender-neutral store?"

"I can't brag about clothes that a girl might wear to my friends!" exclaimed Toad.

"What friends?" asked everyone else.

"Well, ...never mind." muttered Toad.

"Let's get going gir—Boys." said Logan, who was getting tired of all of this nonsense.

-----TBC-----

Yeah... Um. I might write the rest of this chapter, but my sense of humor seems to have gone and died somewhere since middle school. I don't feel like writing humor that much anymore, and I'm not too good at it. Well, see you next chapter, if I continue.