DECEMBER 1997

We're in Wisconsin. And life is hell. Not for the problems between Dad and Sammy. No. It's Elouise. I think she has multiple personalities or something. Really, sometimes she scares me. But sometimes she is just adorable. And she is sassy. Like a lot. I think I'm going to go to one of those group that help people out.. Like AA. Is there one for brothers who are going slowly, but certainly crazy?
I know that people would say that things couldn't be that bad. It is. Trust me they are. I think she is possessed. Maybe I should ask Bobby if he knows some exorcism for little kids.
Ok, you don't believe me? I let you in my horrible world.

She is now 3 years old, so she is developing her personality. Like I say she is sassy and she thinks she is funny. She is fascinated by poop, body parts, pee, toilet and everything that is gross or stinky. And she kind of dislikes dad. I don't know why, but he is the victim of most of her jokes. But we are too. Sammy and me.

So let's begin with something that involves me.
Like I say she thinks she is funny. This summer we (me , Sammy and Elouise) were all at Bobby's. Me and Sammy were downstairs, while Giggles was playing in her room. Then we heard her scream.

"Dean, Sammy, come here! I want to show you something cool!"

We run to the stairs. And see her. The "Something cool" was her, at the top of the stairs, sticking out her nacked butt. I was dumbstruck. Sammy just laugh and walked back in the living room. I didn't know where it all went wrong. A minute she was an adorable little baby girl, the other she was this frat boy. Like, really, Giggles? REALY?!
But that's not the only episode. No.
Always this summer. Uncle Bobby was scolding her. She was throwing toys at Sammy and I was fed up with her at that time, so I let Bobby handle her. So Bobby started yelling at her. She looked him dead in the eyes, while continuing to throw toys at Sam. Then she put her hands up and sad:
"Dude, calm down!"
Then she started again to throw toys. So Bobby got angry.
"GIGGLES, STOP THROWING TOYS AT SAM!"
She stopped, stood up and put the toys in Sammy's lap. Then she turn and walked to Bobby. She pointed her finger at him looking quite angry.
"Uncle Bobby, you are fired!"
Then she went to our room. Let's just say that Bobby was a little taken aback.
The day after she was still angry at Bobby so she went to me, sit in my lap and said:
"We should put Uncle Bobby in the potty! And flush it! And wave goodbye to him! Bye-bye, Uncle Bobby!"
I think that that was her first attempt to murder someone.
But that's not all. And we are just talking about what happen with me an Sammy. Let me tell you another one.

We like to play wrestling (dad say it is good for her hunter training), but sometimes she becomes a little rough. The other day she hit me with her feet. So I told her to stop hitting me with her feet. She looked at me with tears in her eyes, outraged by the accusation
"IT WAS MY ANKLE!"
And she walked off to her bed.
See! This is what I have to pass trough on a DAILY BASIS!
But now let's talk about dad. She seems not to like him very much. I think the reason is because he don't pass a lot of time with her. And when he does he is always a little on edge. Anyway. Let's start simple.

Last month dad walked out from the motel bathroom, and he had shave. So I pointed it out.
"Did you shave, Dad?"
"Yes! Thank you for noticing," he was in a good mood, "how do I look?"
I was about to answering when Elouise came out from nowhere.
"Not good."
Then she walked away.

Another one. The other day we were driving in two cars. So before starting the drive, we were discussing who would drive with whom.
"We're driving with two cars, who's driving with me?"
Dad looked between Sammy and Giggles. The answer from Sam was obvious.
"I'd prefer to drive with Dean, Sir."
Dad nodded. Then looked at Elouise, hopeful. She looked at him with a serious look.
"I'm riding with De, you're riding by yourself!"
Then she went in the car with Sammy. I felt bad for dad. But hey, she loves me better! Even if she's not good at demonstrating it. So here we go. Her adorable moments.

Yesterday she hugged me and Sammy. Then she looked at us with the most adoring look I've ever seen.
"I love you more than ketchup!"
Then she went to play with her plush squirrel.
But she usually isn't that lovely. I always said to her that I love her before she went to bed. Last week she answered me back. Not as gently.
"I love you, Giggles!"
She rose from the bad and head butted my stomach.
"I RHINO you!"
Then went back to bed. Dude, love hurts.
Sometimes she is really funny. Or at least we find fun in something that upsets her.
She is starting to know her body. In fact she goes around naked a lot. She find extremely fascinating her belly button. And she is starting to asking the weirdest thing about how the body works. She is also begin to see the different between males and females.
About that, like three day ago, she walked in on me taking a shower and started to scream at the top of her lungs-
"Your vagina is outside your body! It's hanging outside of your body!"
I immediately turned and tried in vain to cover myself up. Then I calmly explained to her that I had a penis, not a vagina.
She started screaming again.
"NO! It's outside! Something's wrong with your vagina!"
She ran out to the couch and told Sammy how my vagina was "in trouble" and it was outside my body.
Then she said.
"Dean said it was a peanut – but that was not a peanut, I know what a peanut is!"
She still insisted on going to a doctor. Sammy still finds it hilarious. But he'll stop laugh when dad will give him the sex talk.
Then who will laugh? Me. Take that b***.
But that's not it. What scares me the most about Giggles is not her sassiness or her stubbornness or her being mean to people she don't like. No. It's the fact that she is already an Huntress, without any training. I think that the reason is because she see me and Sammy spar. I think she is catching up with our session.
In fact that's the thing that has me thinking now about her multi-personality problem, while she is trying to choke me to death. It all started out as an hug. In fact she came to me and hugged me, smiling a bitter-sweet smile. Then slowly began to squeeze my throat with two hands and whispered hauntingly:
"Are you choking, Dean?"
This is a scenario that me and Sammy had played this afternoon, because of the latest hunt, where the monster was an innocent-looking ghost kid. He used to hug people and then choke them. So dad ordered us to try and get free from someone who was choking us. Anyways. I break free from her hand.
"Yes Elouise, I was chocking! Don't do anything like this again!"
"But you and Sam and Dad do that!"
"Yes, because we are old enough, you can't because you are too small and you could get hurt."
"So, when I'll be old like Sammy I can do it?! YAY!"
She is running across the motel room, jumping on the beds and the sofa.
I am resigned. So just I sit on a chair, looking at Elouise destroying the room. I can't care less.
If there is a God, Please, Help me !