Buffy grips her stake tighter as she watches the line of creatures approaching. Giles and Max both move into position. Max on the roof of Angela and Hodgins's home, Giles in a bush near where the monsters should be halted.
"This is it guys, this is our moment," she says.
Everyone stands for a moment, shifting their feat, mentally preparing for what was soon to come. As more monsters appeared on the horizon and the front lines were not far away, Booth gave a nod. The line they had formed scatters. Connor and Illyria are on the farthest edges. They run off to either side, trailed by Dawn and Sweets respectively. Their plan is to surround the approaching pack, to prevent them from advancing too close to the house and to gain control of their movements.
As Sweets approaches the creature closest to him, he looks up to see it towering above. It scares him, to see something so large before him and be about to challenge it. It makes him hesitate. But, Illyria shouts to him that he must stay calm and remember his training. He creases his brow and strengthens his stance, determined to do his part in battle. After all, Dawn seems to have no fear.
Angela and Hodgins had been standing next to each other. Before they begin to move to help encapsulate the army before them, they grasp each others hands.
"Angela, I love you. I always have and I always will. Don't let me lose you tonight," Hodgins says, suddenly realizing how real of a possibility this is.
Angela leans in to give Hodgins a quick kiss on the lips.
"Do the same for me, sweetie," she responds before running off to circle the opposers.
Cam and Arastoo were also next to each other on the other side. They exchange a quick hug and kiss. No words are spoken between them, but their eyes say it all. Cam is obviously nervous about putting herself, her team, and her boyfriend in this kind of danger. Yet, she is ready to defend her country. Arastoo is prepared to do anything to protect his loved ones.
Xander and Willow march off into the circle, by now used to the anticipation and the possibilities. Spike and Faith saunter to their positions, essentially unafraid of what's to come. All that is left is Buffy and Booth.
"You ready for this?" Buffy asks.
"As ready as I can be I think. I have the memory of countless battles, as a sniper and as a vampire. I think I'll be ok."
"I know, I mean mentally...or emotionally...to have this kind of battle again. It can be traumatizing...cause flashbacks...and so much pain."
"Gee, thanks for the warning. Not much we can do about it Buffy. I'll be ok. And if I'm not, I trust you'll keep me safe."
Buffy nods, thinking about the number of times this man stood next to her in battle but with a different mind, one just a bit less crowded.
They move into position and the battle truly begins. There are vampires and other demons, trolls and ogres, zombies, spirits, living gargoyles. It's as if the entire monster community came together for this battle. And all over the world, similar gatherings were occurring. Other slayers, with their teams, were moving into position to fight the evil before them. Weapons clanged against each other and off armor, battle cries of all kinds echoed off the houses, and everyone was putting full force behind every delivered blow. Giles and Max sit with bows and stashes of arrows, taking out anyone about to injure one of the scoobies or the Jeffersonian.
It's nearly dark now and the battle is outlined with a sort of golden glow. It's almost ironic the beauty that this glow introduces to the gruesome events it's illuminating. Bloody bodies fall to the ground, defeated. As life seeps from them it attests to the idea that nothing gold can stay. And yet, Buffy's assembled team seems to stand strong. Only the monsters trying to destroy the world she has worked so hard to defend are collapsing, beaten and broken, on the street.
Inside the house, Brennan hears the sounds of battle. She tries to keep the children occupied. But, they know that something is going on. She decides to try to make it a game for them. She says that the noises they hear are the sound effects to a battle that their toys are having and suggests that they help their respective teams try to win. With the children distracted, she waits and worries. Outside the room, she hears footsteps. Thinking it's Booth or one of her friends coming to check on her, she opens the door slightly and slips out of the room. But instead of being met with a friendly face, Henry stands before her. His eyes almost glowing with an eerie red hue, his forehead all distorted and fangs protruding.
"Hello there...Dr. Brennan is it? How's your...injury?" he asks.
"H...how did you get out? I thought Willow had you contained?" Brennan responds, trying to contain her fear.
"Magic can't hold me baby, nothing can," Henry laughs as he steps closer to Brennan. She reaches behind her and grips the stake she had stored in her back pocket.
"Don't think I don't know, little girl. You froze up when my boys came to scare you away. That's how you ended up in the hospital. You're too afraid to do anything about me," Henry taunts.
"While you are right that I was scared, you are wrong in the persistence of said fear," Brennan responds calmly.
Henry is close now, he had been stepping forward all the while they were talking. He leans in close to talk into Brennan's ear.
"That's what you think. But, I know you're shaking in your boots. That big brain of yours can't save you now hunny," he whispers.
"Go to hell," Brennan seethes as she moves to stake Henry in the chest. But, he's faster than she is and grabs her wrist, squeezing it until the stake drops, clattering to the floor.
"Not so fast, gorgeous. You're coming with me."
Henry pulls a knife from his pocket and flips it open. Holding it against Brennan's neck, he commands her to walk. He marches her out the front door and to the lawn.
"Hey, Booth," he shouts while still making Brennan walk further. "Isn't this your girl? How could you leave her alone in that house with a killer! Come on, you know my tricks."
Booth freezes, looking up to see his wife with the knife at her throat. Determined to save her, he stakes the vamp that's right in front of him and begins to march forward, stabbing or shoving anything that get's in his way. But as he gets closer, Henry advises him to stop.
"Come any closer and it will be my teeth that sink into this lovely woman's neck, not the blade."
Booth does as he's told and freezes. However, the interaction has gained the attention of Max. Booth sees that Max is moving into a position that would allow him to shoot Henry with an arrow. But, he motions that Henry needs to move a few steps out. So, Booth starts to talk.
"Alright Henry, you win. You can have me if you want. And I can call off the fight. But, don't hurt Brennan."
"Really? This girl is worth this much to you? You'd just walk away and let me take over just to let her live? I don't believe you, what's the catch?" Henry responds, slowly walking forward staring confusedly at Booth.
"I know, I know it's crazy. But, I mean, who would be sane after all I've gone through? Who would be sane with so many personalities, real personalities, running around in my brain?"
"No way, you of all people should be able to take it. And even if you couldn't, Angelus and Angel wouldn't let you do this."
Booth looks up at Max one last time, Max nods.
"You're right. And ya know what, Booth probably wouldn't either. But, he still wouldn't let you threaten his wife like this," Booth says matter of factly.
Henry turns to look where Booth had glanced, exposing his chest and moving Brennan out of the way. Max is already lined up for the shot and takes it. The arrow pierces Henry's chest and he dissolves into dust. Brennan begins to fall to the ground, but Booth catches her.
"You ok?" he asks.
"Yeah, yeah. Don't you have to keep fighting?" she responds.
Booth looks over at the group, there are only a few monsters left. Some had seen their commander go down and ran off. Too afraid to follow through on their own. As the moon rose high above the neighborhood, Booth and Brennan watch as the last few creatures fall. The final one, a dragon, is killed by Buffy. Illuminated by the light of the moon, she thrusts a sword through the heart of the dragon before her. It falls to the ground with a thud. The scoobies and the people of the Jeffersonian just stand there looking at the beings laying before them. They've done it, they have stopped the apocalypse. The Jeffersonian team can't believe that in just a few short days, their world had been flipped upside down and essentially torn apart. Buffy starts to walk towards Brennan and Booth who are still standing in Angela and Hodgins's front yard. Her movement is like the breaking of a spell. Max moves to climb down from the roof, Giles climbs out of the bushes he was hiding in, the rest of the group sort of meander towards the house. Everyone goes inside and sits down in the living room. Still no one has spoken.
Brennan stands up and says, "I'm going to go check on the kids."
"I'll join you," says Angela.
The two walk off into the other room saying nothing else. When they open the door to the kids' room, they see the two children asleep on the floor, their toys still lightly grasped in their hands.
In the living room, Buffy's phone goes off. She answers to find that it's one of the other slayers. Her team had prevailed as well. Several more calls came in over the course of a few minutes. Every single one of the targets have been saved.
Angela and Brennan return from the kids' room. Angela suggests they get some food so Willow orders a pizza. As the night goes on, people begin to head home. Some of the Scoobies go home with people of the Jeffersonian just to have a place to stay. Eventually only Buffy, Booth, And Brennan are left at Angela's home.
"I...I think I'm going to go to bed," says Angela. "You're welcome to stay longer if you'd like. I just really need to get some sleep. Everything seems so surreal right now. It's probably amplified by sleep deprivation. We can meet up tomorrow and maybe talk about what happened."
Booth stands up and says, "We won't hang around Angela, we all need sleep too." He turns to Buffy and asks, "Where are you staying tonight Buffy?"
"Oh...uhhh...I don't know…" she responds.
"She could stay with us?" suggests Brennan.
Booth looks at his wife, surprised. He knows that she feels uneasy about Angel's feelings towards Buffy.
"Really? You're sure?" he asks.
"Now that the immediate danger has been eliminated, you will have to start processing the memories you have regained. I do not have a strong understanding of the nature of your previous lives nor do I understand the kind of world they took place in. I feel that if you suddenly need someone to help you before tomorrow, and not just listen, Buffy would be the best person to go to. I want you to be able to get through this as quickly and as easily as possible. So, yes. I am sure. Buffy should stay with us."
"Thank you, Dr. Brennan," Buffy responds.
Brennan, Buffy and Booth all head home. Booth carries Christine who remains asleep in his arms. Angela walks over to her husband after they leave and kisses him.
"We didn't lose each other," she says.
"No, we didn't," he responds smiling.
They move Michael-Vincent into his bed and head off to bed themselves.
At Booth and Brennan's home, Booth get's Christine into bed before showing Buffy to Parker's room for the second time this week.
"Booth, Dr. Brennan is right, you are going to have to start processing everything of the past few days. If this happens before I'm up, don't hesitate to wake me. I want to help you through this as much as possible," Buffy says.
"Thank you Buffy, I really appreciate it."
Booth shuts the door behind him as he leaves to go to his own room where Brenna is waiting for him to join her in bed.
"How are you feeling?" she asks.
"Sore, haven't done fighting like that in a long time. And tired, we've hardly slept!"
"I agree."
"Hey, how are you feeling? You've had it rough lately too."
"Just tired, Booth. And worried about you."
"Hey...don't be worried about me! I'll be fine, always am."
"I hope so. Goodnight."
"Goodnight," Booth says and kisses his wife before they both close their eyes to sleep.
A few hours later, Booth wakes in a sweat. He had been dreaming about his time as Angelus, the time his soul had been ripped from him after finally becoming comfortable with being Angel. He got back his soul just second before Buffy thrust him into a portal to Hell. He thought he'd never escape, that he'd be stuck there for eternity. But somehow, he was returned to the earth. But, not the same as he was before. He was more scared, and broken, and weak. But, Buffy helped him rebuild himself. Unable to fall back asleep, but not wanting to wake his sleeping wife, Booth walks downstairs to Buffy's room and knocks on the door.
"Who's there?" her voice responds through the door.
"It's me, Booth. Did...did I wake you?" he asks.
"No, I've been awake. Couldn't sleep," she answers, opening the door. "What's wrong?" she asks as soon as she sees his face.
"I was...dreaming."
The two of them go out into the living room to talk. Booth describes the nightmare and Buffy sits and listens. After he's finished, Buffy pauses for a moment before beginning to speak.
"Do...do you have any questions or anything?" she asks.
"No, not really. I mean, I know what happened and I know why," he responds.
"You know, you never did tell me what actually happened after I...after you...went through the portal. You always explain it the same way. That you you went to Hell, simple as that. You never give details."
"There is a reason for that ya know," he says leaning forward resting his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands.
"I figured…" she states.
"But, if you really want to know...it was torture...mostly. When I first arrived, it seemed just as if I had arrived in a desert. The sand was dark red, I could see mountains in the distance that were black and brown looking. The sky was a dark purple with what seemed to be stars. It was actually beautiful. I was confused though. I knew where I had been sent. The moment my soul was returned to me...I didn't understand much. But, where I was going was very clear to me. Wandering around this barren land, memories came back...the things I had done as Angelus surfaced in my mind as if smoke was settling. I thought I deserved to be somewhere worse than the place I was in. It was too beautiful...to calm. I wondered how this place could possibly be Hell. But then, the sun began to rise. I could see it, on the edge of the horizon where there were no mountains. It wasn't simply round like our sun. I could see the flames around the edges, kinda like how little kids draw suns with the big spikes. But, they were not spikes, they were full on flames like a giant fire rising in the purple sky. And it was close, close to the planet I was on. Close enough that I could feel the burning heat of the mass before me just moments after the first flames appeared. I moved my arm to cover my eyes and turned to run. But, I saw someone in a dark cloak. He grabbed me and pulled me a few feet before shoving me into a hole in the ground. He asked me what I was doing out during sunrise. I told him I didn't know and that I was new to the place. He explained to me that you must never be out during the day because otherwise you will simply burn up. That any creature outside in the sun is found as a pile of dust in the night. I thought it was kind of funny coming from the life I lived and having everyone experience the same problem. But there was another danger the cloaked figure had to warn me about. There were a group of people...humans...who had been damned to this hell dimension and become the unofficial leaders. They would come searching for new beings they could make into their pets or their workers or their entertainment...He told me that I should hide from them and that I could stay with him until sunset. But that after that, I was on my own. We spent the day in his home, a hole dug deep into the ground to keep the heat of the day out. When the sun set, he lead me back out and left me standing in the desert yet again. I wandered for what felt like eternity. The man refused to tell me anything about the land or where I could hide. I hadn't fed in over a day and I was starting to feel weak. I knew the sun had to be coming up soon and had nearly accepted my fate. Although, I wasn't sure what that fate was as I would likely just end up in a different dimension of Hell. I collapsed on the ground a few seconds before the first flames were seen on the horizon. And like the previous night, a figure appeared from seemingly nowhere and stood before me. But, unlike the previous night, this figure's cloak was ornate with embroidered flames on the bottom, the sleeves, and the hood that seemed to be stitched with fire itself. The figure forced me to stand and told me to follow him out of the light. That is just what I did. But, this figure was part of the group I had been warned about. It took me to a dungeon like place and locked me up without nourishment. I was left there for what must have been days until a different man with the same type of cloak came to get me. He told me that I was lucky, that I was their new entertainment, that I should be grateful for not being made into a worker. He said it was my pretty face that saved me. Then, he locked a rusted metal collar onto my neck and hooked a chain leash onto that. He led me, like a dog, to a large arena. The ground was dirt and the seats seemed to be carved out of the rocks of the mountain. On the other side of the arena was a large creature. It looked like a bull, but with human legs. I hadn't really seen anything quite like it before. The drastic line between the animal part and the human part of the creature seemed unnatural. The leash was removed, but the collar remained. Gates were shut behind me and a horn sounded. The bull like creature rushed at me. I fought back, but there was not much that I could do. My strength was gone and I knew nothing of the being before me. When I collapsed, a shock was sent through my collar and I was made to stand up and continue fighting. This went on for at least the length of a day. Finally I was returned to my cell and given some food. I was visited by more of this strange and twisted group. They told me that I needed to train to improve my fighting or I'd be made into a worker. They told me they would help me. Their version of helping was torturing me to no end until I could hardly feel the pain they inflicted, until I no longer felt a sense of self. I had become, essentially, an animal. At this point, I was sent back into the arena. I faced the same creature. But this time, I won. I was entered into battle after battle, each one facing a stronger opponent. I won every time, but each time I did, I felt less and less like a person. Eventually I reached what the group considered to be the hardest battle. They trained me more for this one. But, I lost. I was thrown back into my cell with no food after that. I curled up in the corner on the floor. When I woke up, I was no longer in the cell. it felt like I was no where, just surrounded by a bright light. I thought that I was being killed for losing, that I would wake up in another hell dimension. Instead, I woke up on earth…"
Buffy just stares at Booth sitting there for a moment. She can see the pain in his eyes. He looks so broken, like admitting to losing himself in that time is so shameful. She blames herself though, she knows his torture was necessary in order to save the world. The world would have itself became Hell otherwise. But, that doesn't stop the guilt Buffy feels. She remembers the pain she felt when she looked into her love's eyes as he was sucked into the portal and is ashamed for even feeling bad for herself.
Booth had sat up to tell Buffy the story of his time in Hell, but he was again resting his head in his hands. Buffy moves closer to him, gently grabbing his wrist with one hand and guiding his face to look at her with the other. She hold his face in both her hands and looks him in the eye. When he looks at her, he sees tears running down her cheeks.
"I'm s...sorry. I'm sorry you had to go through that. I'm sorry I am the one who sent you there. I'm sorry I am always the one to cause you the most pain even though...I love you with all my heart. I always have. But, I've had to put it aside so many times...for the sake of the world. And I'm sorry that you couldn't have just been my life, that my responsibilities as a slayer always had to come first...And I'm sorry that after you had finally escaped the kind of life we always had to live, I came barreling back in to take it all away from you," Buffy says, pausing to take a breath. She's been trying to unsuccessfully hold back her tears as she speaks.
"Buffy...you don't have to apologize. I always understood why you did the things you did."
"I know but…"
Booth interrupts Buffy by hugging her close to him. She is caught off guard. But, for the first time in a long time, she feels peace within herself. Booth feels it too, the sense of relief they both feel in each other's arms. After a moment, he pulls away to look at her. Their foreheads are resting against each other. Booth reaches forward to wipe a tear away from Buffy's eye. Buffy is the one to make the next move. She tilts her head upwards, slightly at first and then more so until their lips meet softly. Booth kisses back, forgetting himself and existing only as Angel. But when he realizes what he is doing, he pulls away. When he looks at Buffy he can see tears running down her face.
"I just wish that we could be together again...it would be different. With other slayers and with your human form...we could have the life we always dreamed of. I miss you, Angel," Buffy says.
"I...I miss you too," Booth responds hesitantly.
"Um...maybe, we should go back to bed," Buffy says, wiping away her tears. "Are you going to be ok?"
"I think so...for now at least. Will you?" Booth asks.
"Haha, depends on what you mean by ok…"
"You know, we could just...stay up...watch a show or something for a while...to get our mind off things...have a little normalcy?"
"There is nothing normal about us sitting on a couch watching a show in 4 in the morning."
"That's a very good point...but, it would still be nice."
"Won't your wife wonder where you are when she wakes up?"
"Oh...she'll understand...I think."
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah...want some ice cream?" Booth says, getting up to go to the kitchen.
He scopes two bowls of cookie dough ice cream before sitting back down on the couch and handing one to Buffy. They turn on the TV and flip through the channels a bit. Eventually, they land on "The X-FIles". They both agree that they love that show and leave the channel where it is. As the night goes on, they grow more tired. But, neither wants to go back to bed. Buffy's head falls lightly onto Booth's shoulder as she drifts off to sleep. Booth's head soon follows to rest on hers.
The next morning, Brennan comes downstairs to see her husband asleep on the couch with Buffy. She goes over to him and shakes his arm gently until he wakes up. When he does, she asks to talk to him upstairs. So, Booth Moves to the side slowly and lowers Buffy's head onto a pillow. He follows Brennan upstairs to their room.
"What happened last night, Booth?" Brennan asks.
"I had a dream...I nightmare about something I went through as Angel. I needed to talk to someone who knew what went on then. So, I went to talk to Buffy. After we talked, neither of us could sleep. We turned on the TV and must have dozed off at some point."
"Ok," Brennan responds. She seems a bit uneasy but she looks into her husband's eyes and sees that he's struggling. "Are you ok?" she asks.
"I am but I'm not...I have accepted the things I did in the past the same way I had accepted the things I did as a sniper. I just want to continue to make up for it by helping to save lives and to bring others to justice. But there were things I went through, tortuous things that I need to come to terms with. And...there are feelings I had for people I once knew very well that I need to sort out. Things are going to be...complicated...for me, for us, at least for a bit."
"We'll get through this Booth. And if I can help...let me know, ok?"
"Of course. Now, breakfast?"
"Haha, ok."
In that moment, the mood shifts. Both Brennan and Booth feel certain that things will work out alright. Booth goes into the kitchen and starts making pancakes. Buffy wakes up from the smell and is momentarily confused on where she is. But seeing Booth in the kitchen, she remembers the previous night. Brennan wakes up Christine and the four of them eat breakfast together. Christine tells Buffy all about the adventure she had with Michael-Vincent and their toys the previous night. After breakfast, Booth, Brennan, and Buffy take Christine to day care and the three of them go to the Jeffersonian.
The rest of the group is there already, sitting in the seating area up on the second floor overlooking the lab. No new bodies had come up yet, so there was some time to discuss what happened. Injuries that were seemingly ignored the previous night were acknowledged and tended to. No one was seriously hurt. But, everyone had cuts and bruises. Sweets seems to have sprained his ankle, Illyria had taken care of it when they had gotten him home though. Xander thinks he may have a fractured arm and plans to go to the hospital in a few hours. Despite the injuries, the general mood seems to be positive. The danger was defeated and the world was saved.
"So, what happens now?" Angela asks after everyone shared the most exciting and scary moments of the battle.
"Well, we'll all probably go home early tomorrow But, you guys can feel free to contact us when ever. And it doesn't have to be because of some crazy danger or anything. We can come visit just for fun if you'd like. I think we'd all get along even without the end of the world looming above us," Buffy responds.
"I know it's only been a few days, but I think we all feel so close to you guys," says Sweets.
"I think it's safe to say, we feel the same," responds Willow.
A little while later, everyone decides to go home. The scoobies again go with some of the people from the Jeffersonian. This time, they plan to have some fun. Buffy is standing by herself at the edge of the group before everyone leaves. Booth approaches her.
"Would you like to come home with Bones and me again?" he asks.
"Actually, I think it best I go with someone else for now. If you need me, you can call me though."
"Oh, alright," Booth says, kind of dissapointed. It's shocking the pull he feels between himself and Buffy. After an awkward moment where neither person could decide how they would say goodbye to each other for the time being, Booth nods his head and walks away.
"Isn't Buffy coming with us?" brennan asks.
"No, she had something else she had to do," Booth responds.
Booth and Brennan go to the Royal Diner for lunch. But while they are there, Booth seems to grow quieter as time passes. He stares into his mug of coffee and avoids eye contact with Brennan for most of the time. Brennan tries to make conversation, small talk mostly, which feels strange to her. It's rare for things to feel this uncomfortable around Booth.
"Everything ok, Booth?" she asks finally.
"Yeah...yeah...just thinking about some things," he responds.
"About your memories?" Brennan asks.
"...yeah," Booth says with a sigh.
"Do you want to tell me about them?"
"Ya know Bones, I don't think you really want to hear them. Most of them ya probably won't believe anyway so...I'll be ok. I just need to...understand...what these new memories mean about who I am as a person and about my future."
"Oh...ok. Well, if you do decide to tell me, I'll be very open minded. I can think of it as research, anthropologically speaking. As trying to understand a newly discovered culture. I do believe these beings exist, Booth. I can't deny that, not after everything we've gone through."
"Thanks, Bones. Maybe someday. Just, not yet."
With that the silence resumes. It almost seems more tense now. As if Booth has become even more conflicted by the conversation. This worries Brennan. If she cannot be there for Booth in the capacity he needs, what does that mean about them? And what does he mean about needing to understand his future? She knows it must be hard trying to figure out if a new past will give you a new personality or a new outlook. But, future? He had said earlier that he just wanted to make up for the negative things he has done in his lives. That's what he's always done, why would anything change?
Booth can tell that Brennan is becoming concerned. But, he doesn't know how to do anything about that. He loves her, he knows he does. And he loves what he does for a living. Yet, that doesn't feel like enough anymore. Part of him longs to be back to his old life, fighting demons everyday...with Buffy at his side. He realizes how similar his present life is. The love of his life as his partner, a strong group of colleagues that double as friends, fighting the monsters of the 'real world' trying to punish them for their crimes. It's an idealized version of what he once knew a long time ago as Angel. But, he can have that idealized life as Angel now. Can't he? He's not even sure what he can have right now, let alone what he wants.
As Booth and Brennan continue to sit quietly at the diner, Buffy goes for a walk. She wants to clear her head, to make sense of what happened last night. She kissed Booth...and Booth kissed back. He wasn't Booth then though, he was Angel. They are different people, inside the same mind. But, are they really all that different? The main difference is who their heart belongs to. As she's walking past one of the darker alleys of the city, Spike calls out to her.
"Buffy, thought you'd be with Booth today."
"Yeah...he invited me over but I decided to see the city a bit. Ya know, without the whole lot of monsters and impeding doom and such."
"The man rejected you didn't he, love?"
"No...not exactly. Anyway, it's none of your business!"
"Oh but it is, Buffy. I know how you feel. See right now, you're me. You know how right he is for you and would do anything to have him. But, he doesn't see it the same way. He can't decide if you're right for him...so he drags you along until one day you either give up or he decides."
"Come on, Spike. I didn't do that to you. You knew how much I hated you. I just needed you…"
"That's the thing though...part of you needed me, yes. That part loved me. The other part hated me and hated that you needed me. So, you did exactly what this bloke will do to you."
"No, he just needs time to think. He just had three new lives shoved into his brain. There's a lot he has to figure out."
"Yeah, and you shouldn't try and persuade him any other way."
"What do you mean?"
"You think if he decides to let the Angel part of him take control and leaves this place to be with you that it will be all sunshine and daisies. But, it won't. This confusion and torment and complication will keep on going. For years, he will be trying to figure out which part of him wins in each new situation. And that...that'd be hard to deal with. Not to mention, this would be the third time he was destroying his own family."
"I know, but…"
"Give a rest, will ya? He is not yours to have. the sooner ya realize that, the better off you'll be," Spike says as he pulls a cigarette out of a pack in his back pocket and places it in his mouth.
Buffy shakes her head and keeps walking. She knows he's right, that it wouldn't be fair to even allude to Booth leaving his family. But, neither Spike nor herself know what Booth wants. If he chooses to go back to the life of fighting monsters late into the night, who is she to stop him. She decides that they should talk.
Booth and Brennan go home after finishing their meal at the diner. Brennan sits down on the couch and waits for a moment to see what Booth is going to do. He stands there kind of awkwardly for a moment before saying he's going to go out for a run to clear his mind. He leaves the room to get changed. Brennan sighs before picking up the phone to call Angela.
"Hello?" Angela answers.
"Hi, Angela...I was wondering if you wanted to take the kids out of daycare and take them to the park or something. Maybe grab a coffee or something before we go?" Brennan suggests.
Angela can sense that something is not right with her best friend. Her voice sounds almost shakey, which hardly ever happens.
"Sweetie, is everything ok?"
"Yeah...I just...really need to see you...and to talk."
"Of course, meet me at my house. We'll ride together," Angela says.
"Thanks, Angela."
Brennan hangs up the phone just as Booth comes downstairs in his running clothes.
"I'm going to take Christine to the park with Angela and Michael-Vincent," Brennan says when she sees him."
"Good, good. That will be fun."
"It will. Good luck with your run. See you for dinner?"
"Of course, see you then," Booth says. He gives Brennan a quick kiss before heading out the door.
Brennan and Angela sip coffee as they watch their children play.
"Can you believe that they had almost no idea what was going on last night? They fell asleep during it all," Angela says, trying to start up a conversation.
"It's quite hard to believe. They are smart kids and very observational. Maybe it has to do with the idea of some psychologists that we see, or in this case hear and understand, only what we want to," Brennan states.
"Well yeah, I think that's true. Not just for kids, but for everyone. I mean, apparently we've been surrounded by these monsters for all our lives. Yet, we are so hesitant to believe that they exist. Almost like how people tend to be hesitant that humans can be just as bad if not worse than some of those monsters."
"Yes...and we can be blind to certain changes in the people around us or how those changes make us feel."
"Are you speaking from experience Brennan?"
"I am not blind to how I feel, or that Booth has changed. I know that I am worried about Booth and I am nervous that this will change us. However, I may be in denial about the extent of Booth's changes and the possibility of it being the end of what we have."
"What do you mean?"
"I think that in Booth's mind, Angel's memories and personality might dominate. He therefore would act in accordance to Angel's passions and needs. In this case, Buffy. I can tell that there is a struggle going on inside his mind. I just can't tell who's winning."
"Well, Brennan, you might be talking to the wrong person this time. You know I'm always here for you. But, I know Booth. I don't know Angel. And honestly, what is happening is very psychological. I think you should talk to Sweets. Maybe both of you should."
"That might really help Booth figure himself out. Would you mind...watching Christine, I want to talk to Sweets as soon as possible."
"Of course, sweetie."
"Thank you so much, Angela," Brennan says, standing up and hugging her friend goodbye.
Brennan drives to Sweet's office and knocks on the door. Sweets answers, which is kind of surprising. Brennan thought that everyone had decided to go home.
"Dr. Brennan, what are you doing here?" asks Sweets.
"I need to talk to you...about Booth."
"Uhhh, funny you should mention him," Sweets says, opening the door further so Brennan can see into the room.
Booth is sitting on the couch in front of Sweets's desk. He looks tired and stressed.
"Hiya Bones," he says, turning around. "I was out on my run and ended up running here. My guess is you're here for the same reason I am?"
"Well, that depends. What is your reason?"
"I need help figuring out my mind. And who better to figure out my mind than our friend, the shrink," Booth says, cocking a half smile.
"I'm so worried about you Booth, Angela suggested that I talk to Sweets to see if he had any idea of how to help you."
"Well, you guys are in luck because I do," Sweets chimes in. "But, Booth, you're going to have to do this mostly on your own. Allowing other people to become involved will allow things to be suggested to you indirectly. You need to make sense of what each personality in your mind wants, write them down separately. Then, assess them. Trying to go back and forth mentally is challenging. With what you want written out plainly before you, you will have a better chance of identifying what YOU want. Writing down the pros and cons to each scenario will most likely help too."
"Ok. I can do that."
"Good, but like I said, you have to do it alone. No one else can be arround or interrupt you during this. I can let you stay here in my office. Brennan and I can go for a walk. Call us when you're done. But, take your time. There is paper on my desk that you can use."
Brennan and Sweets leave the room, Sweets locks the door behind them to allow Booth complete privacy. Booth walks over to Sweets's desk and sits down. He picks up a pen and stares at the blank paper in front of him thinking. After a moment, he gets to work.
Booth writes his own name at the top of the paper. Next to his name he writes Angel followed by Angelus and Liam, each of the personalities whose memories he know has. Under 'Booth', he writes Brennan's name, his daughter's, the F.B.I., and the Jeffersonian. Under 'Angel', he writes Buffy's name, the scoobies, and defending the world against the unknown dangers within it. At 'Angelus', Booth stops for a moment before crossing out the name. Angelus wants nothing more than to kill. It's not difficult for Booth to know that is not what he wants for his life. Booth hesitates at 'Liam' as well, deeply thinking about his memories from so very, very long ago. Booth's pen hovers over the paper as he thinks. Almost subconsciously, the pen touches down and Booth scratches the word family down on the page. He leans back, staring at all he has written. Then, under 'Booth', he writes 'family' again. He furrows his brow, digging deeper into Angel's subconscious. Finally, under 'Angel', Booth writes 'family'. Leaning back again, he smiles.
Sweets and Brennan are walking along the sidewalk outside.
"You know Booth will get through this Dr. Brennan," Sweets says, reassuringly.
"I know this. But, at what cost?"
'What do you mean?"
"He must have told you what Angel wants. Didn't he?"
"No, not specifically. He just said that Angel wants different things than Booth. Well, himself. I assumed he meant that Angel wants to fight the crime of monsters now, instead of people."
"I'm sure that's part of it. But, Angel also wants to be with Buffy. They were together once but went their separate ways because Angel could not give Buffy what she needed. He had decided that if he ever became human, he would be with her again. Instead, he lost all his memories and ended up as Booth."
"Dr. B, just because Angel wants to be with Buffy, doesn't mean that's what Booth with decide."
"But, Booth was Angel first. He is technically more Angel than he is Booth."
"That is actually not true. He is Booth now. So, by default, he is more Booth than he is Angel."
"What do you mean?"
"When you were a kid, you behaved differently than you do now, right?"
"Of course, my brain has developed substantially since then. It would be illogical to suggest that I behaved the same as an adult that I did as a child."
"Yes, but you were a kid first. You have the memories of being a kid and you know why you did the things you did when you were a kid. But, you are still your adult self. The situation is similar for Booth. Your personality is a result of all the things you have encountered in your life. It is most affected by the more recent events and your more recent understanding of things."
"Yes, but Booth just received these memories of Angel and the others. Doesn't that make those memories the most influential?"
"One would think. But, from talking to Booth, he can feel that these memories are in the past. His temporal perception of them is as if he experienced all these thoughts and feelings long ago. Because they are newly introduced, this is confusing. Which is why he needs to separate things more distinctly. But, you have nothing to worry about Dr. Brennan."
As soon as Sweets finishes saying this, Brennan's phone rings. It's Booth saying that he has finished and that, at least to some extent, he has figured out what he wants and what he needs.
Sweets and Brennan meet Booth back at Sweets's office. Booth doesn't say anything about what he has figured out. No one really pushes him either. On their way back, Sweets had warned Brennan that Booth would likely tell of his revelation on his own time and not to question him. So, she simply gives Booth a hug and lets him know she is happy that Sweets could help him. Booth and Brennan both thank Sweets and leave the building. As they exit, they see Buffy coming towards them.
"Hey Buffy, have you been out and about all day?" Booth asks.
"Oh, wasn't expecting to run into you. Yeah, I've just been walking around, exploring the city."
"Like what you see?"
"Yeah. It's no Sunnydale and certainly no L.A.. But, it's nice."
"Good, good. Hey, do you have plans for dinner?"
"No, I figured I'd maybe ask Willow or Xander if they wanted to go out somewhere or something."
"Why don't you come over?" Booth suggests. "If that's ok with you, that is," he says to Brennan. She nods in agreement.
Buffy hesitates at first before saying, "Sure, I'd like that."
The three of them get into Brennan's car. They stop at Angela's to pick up Christine. There, Angela suggests getting everyone together at the Founding Fathers, their favorite bar, later that evening as a sort of goodbye party. Brennan agrees and Angela says that she will contact everyone.
When Booth and Brennan get home with Buffy and Christine, Booth and Brennan go into the kitchen to start cooking. Buffy sits down at the island in the kitchen and Christine sits next to her.
"What are we having?" Christine asks.
"How about...SPAGHETTI?" Booth responds with excitement.
"YEAH!" Christine responds. She turns to Buffy and says matter of factly, "I love spaghetti and my daddy makes the best spaghetti ever."
Buffy laughs, "I can't wait to try some then. If you like it so much, it has to be good!"
Christine smiles and then turns back to her parents.
"Can I go play, mommy and daddy?" she asks.
"Yes, for a little bit before dinner," Brennan responds.
"Can Buffy play too?"
"Well, that's up to Buffy," Booth answers this time.
"Sure I can!" Buffy says, following Christine into the living room where she pulls out some stuffed animals and other toys.
Booth and Brennan continue to cook and call everyone to the table when it's ready. They eat quietly, feeling a bit awkward. Christine is usually the one to break the silence, telling her parents what she did at the park with Michael-Vincent today and what adventures they had at 'Aunt Angela's' house. When dinner is done, everyone helps to clear the table and Brennan leaves the room to ask her father to watch Christine while they are out with the Jeffersonian team and the scoobies. Booth and Buffy sit in the living room watching Christine play.
"Buffy, I need to tell you something," Booth says. He's nervous and this is obvious.
"What's up?" Buffy asks, her own nerves spiking.
"I know that with my memories back you had to have hopped that we could be together again. You spent so long suppressing your feelings for Angel...well, me…and now that I'm human and remember the way I felt for you...the way I feel for you...you had to have had hope," Booth says before pausing.
"Yeah…" Buffy says questioningly.
"And I do want to be with you, Buffy. Well, part of me does. But, I can't. I have a family here. I've lost my family far to many times to lose them again. Not many people get three tries at this. And not many people can mess it up as bad as I did. I mean, come on. I killed my first family and let my son, my second chance, be dragged off to a hell dimension and be trained to hate me."
Buffy laughs but there is sadness in her eyes.
"I guess what I'm trying to say is that I love you Buffy. But, not in a way that lets us be together. I know that we would both enjoy fighting the monsters side by side. Too much has changed for that though. I need to keep my life where it is."
"I understand. And honestly, I've got on without you this long. Can we at least be friends?"
"Of course. Whenever you need me, let me know. I'll do what I can."
"Same goes for you."
"Thanks Buffy," Booth says just as Brennan comes back from the other room.
"Christine, grandpa is going to come visit you because daddy and I are going out for a little bit ok?" Brennan says. She doesn't ask Booth and Buffy what they were talking about. She figures she will know soon enough.
"Yay!" Christine responds. She loves seeing her grandpa and has gotten a lot of time with him the past few days.
When Max arrives, Booth, Brennan, and Buffy get into Booth's car and they drive to the Founding Fathers. Everyone is there already, laughing and talking about all they've experienced. The Jeffersonian team is swapping stories of some of their more interesting cases for tales of apocalypses avoided by a bunch of teenage kids. Booth, Brennan, and Buffy happily join in the conversation. As the night goes on, people begin to realize how little time they have left together. Everyone is a bit sad, they all get along quite well. But, it's late and the scoobies have an early flight the next morning. So, the group starts heading home.
Buffy decides to stay at Booth and Brennan's again. There is no late night conversation this time though. She simply says goodnight and goes to Parker's room. Booth and Brennan still haven't talked about his decision or about what he had been telling Buffy earlier. Brennan still doesn't question it though. They just go upstairs and get into bed. Brennan rests her head and Booth's shoulder and breaths in his scent. She feels so calm with him by her side, like she belongs there. She hopes that tomorrow night she can still say that.
The next morning, the Jeffersonian team drives each of the scoobies to the airport. They hug and say goodbye to each other, promising to stay in touch. As soon as Buffy walks through the door of the airport, Cam's phone rings. A body was found in a lab at one of the local colleges, but not one of their cadavers. With that, the lives of the people of Jeffersonian team are back to normal. They go about their job as usual until it's time to head home for the night.
At home, Booth and Brennan put Christine to bed a while after dinner. Booth grabs a bottle of wine and pours a glass for each of them before sitting down on the couch and gesturing for Brennan to join him. She sits and Booth puts his arm around her.
"Booth, I have to tell you, I was very worried you were going to be leaving on that plane this morning," Brennan says.
"Bones, I love you. I would never be able to walk away from you and Christine."
"I know that. But, I didn't know if you would still act as yourself or if Angel would take over."
"That's what I was having such a hard time with. It was like, I knew I was myself and I knew how I would act in the given situation. But, I felt everything that Angel would be feeling as well. Almost like I was two distinct people instead of one man with memories of my earlier life that were drastically different from what I had experienced more recently."
"That must have been very difficult for you."
"It was...and it will probably continue to be at certain points. But, that's ok. Cause I've got you and I've got Sweets's tactic to figure myself out. So we've got nothing to worry about."
"Ok, Booth," Brennan says smiling.
"Hey, cheers to saving the world!" Booth says.
"Cheers."
Booth and Brennan clang their glasses and take a sip of their wine. Brennan lets her head rest on Booth's shoulder. Booth tightens his arm to pull his wife closer to him. They spend the rest of the evening like that. Sipping wine and talking. They start to doze off on the couch. But, they don't care. They don't really want to go to bed yet.
In a sleepy voice Brennan says, "Hey, Booth?"
"Yeah, Bones?" he responds, sounding equally sleepy.
"I love you."
"I love you too."