Hi all, firstly thanks for all the reviews! Made me SO HAPPY. Please send more more more! If you don't, this could always be the last chapter, and we don't want that…
In saying that this isn't THE END, so don't get too upset. If you review enough there will be more chapters :P
Well, yeah so read on Mcduff, hope you enjoy and review!
Massacrerose: Thanks, really glad you enjoy, and to Hollita and A: Thank you for being amazing and loyal and wonderfull!
As ever, you rock Aquarinus!
Harry got used to the extreme changes in Draco. He continued to have melt downs and continued amaze Harry with seemingly random bouts of happiness.
Over the next few weeks Hermione had become more used to Draco as well. She visited often, and although she was still worried about what would happen to her friend when Draco didn't recover (because she didn't believe he ever would), she respected his choice.
When there was a nock at the door, Harry just assumed it was either her or Ron. But it wasn't. as soon he opened the door he was slammed against the opposite wall, a hand on his wind pipe. "what the fuck have you done with my godson?" A furious Severus Snape asked. Harry immediately stopped fighting, whatever hellish pain the man was about to inflict on him he knew he deserved it. "answer me!" Severus demanded. "nothing recently." Harry said. " I mean, I, well, you know I was under that curse and-"
"where is he?" Severus demanded. " I need to speak with him."
"of course, but let me talk to him first." Harry said. "he…isn't having a great day." Severus glared at him, but let go. "be quick potter"
Draco was on his knees in the dining hall, a room that was never used but Draco still felt like he had to polish the floor every week. "Draco, there's someone here to see you." Harry said softly. Draco looked up, confused, why would someone come to see him? He didn't know anyone…
"it's Severus Snape, do you remember him?" Draco thought hard. He shook his head. Harry sighed.
"Well, he's your family, and he wants to see you okay? So why don't you go through to the living room and I'll show him though." Draco stood up and Harry was about to go back into the hall when Draco spoke; "actually master, could we go to the music room please? I think… I think he likes to play the piano. I think we used to play together. "
"okay, the music room it is." Harry promptly agreed.
It didn't take Severus long to assess Draco's mental state. He sighed as he looked in to those blue eyes.
"can I ask you something? I think it's something I should know… but I don't." Draco said.
"ask away." Severus said as gently as he could. "how old am i?" Draco asked. "you don't know?" Severus replied, stunned. "I feel…out of time. Nothing connects anymore…there's now, when I'm in this house. I think I've been good. Master is always here. And it's sunny, I like that…and then there was before, when I was in a different house. That was colder, I was very bad then…or master was very angry, I can't understand which. And I think there might have been a time even before that… but I can't remember it very well. "
" I see… well, there was a time before that. I knew you then. You're 17 by the way, your birthday is December the first." Severus informed him softly. " you lived with your parents then, and you attended Hogwarts."
"okay." Draco said, before changing the subject. It seemed that he had no interest in the past.
There was something about Draco that was wholly innocent and unassuming. He had a lightness about him that was extraordinary. It got to Severus and he swept him into an embrace, the first time he had ever hugged someone of his own free will. Draco hugged back happily.
Severus played the piano for him, and he was phenomenal, as Draco knew he would be. "you played once, do you remember? You were exquisite." Draco blushed scarlet, still so unused to compliments.
Severus didn't stay long that day; he had only really come to scream at Harry. He had assumed that he would have dumped Draco in a mental institution. Severus was exceedingly glad Harry had done so, even though he thought it was idiotic of him. Severus thought it might kill Harry to put Draco back together again. But he really didn't care, Potter wasn't his problem, Draco was.
Stiffly, he arranged with Harry to come back and see Draco again a few days later.
He go to the door before turning around and saying; " Just so you know Potter, you're the lowest form of life. You are an evil monstrosity that should pay for what he had done. The only reason you haven't had the dementor's kiss is because you're Harry fucking Potter. The world might not know what you have done, the papers don't, but I do, and rest assured his mother will. May you go through Hell." And he walked out.
But a few minutes later, Draco wished he hadn't left. He had said something about his parents… it touched a chord in Draco, although he didn't really understand why. He didn't remember them, didn't need them since he had master… but there was still something inside of him that felt warm when he thought of them. He wanted to see them, he realised suddenly. He had very much enjoyed seeing Snape, even though he didn't really understand how they were related….but never mind. Maybe he would be nice to see his parents too? He would ask master…..
And so he wondered though to the bed room, and wrote his request on a slip of parchment, before slipping it in to the box. It was up to his master if he was allowed to see them or not. His master had perfect judgement and was right in everything, so Draco know he wouldn't steer his pet wrong.
Harry had to admit that he was less than thrilled when he got Draco's request. In fact he felt slightly queasy. He had no doubt that Snape would inform the Malfoys of what had happened to their son, and that was enough to make Harry feel sick with dread. How could he face the Malfoys after what had happened? They had been death eaters, yes, but after what he had done, how could he even look them in the eye?
But it was his family and no matter how much Harry personally dreaded it, he couldn't deny Draco this. He owled the Malfoy's on Draco's behalf and quickly received a response. The tone was cool, but under it there was a definite note of hysteria and desperation to see their son.
Well, her son, Narcissa Malfoy had written the note; Mr. Malfoy hadn't even signed it.
Harry just prayed that Draco would be having a good day. Sometimes it was a struggle to even get Draco to talk to him, and he never looked at him. But on the crisp October morning that they had agreed to head to Manor, Draco was in fine sprits. Well, as fine as his spirits ever got, but Harry tired not to think about that.
Harry's eyes went wide as they arrived in front of the gates. The manor was huge, a proper estate that was clearly as old as the Malfoy name itself. It practically smelt of power and money and even Harry was intimidated as the gates opened and they made their way up the long path to the front door.
But it opened even before they got their and a beautiful woman stepped out.
Draco flew into his mother's arms, breaking away from his master without a second thought.
Harry approached the door more slowly, not wanting to interrupt the mother and son. Narciassa seemed to be crying softly and in no hurry to let go of Draco, nor Draco her.
But she did break away when he saw Harry. She stood to her fullest high and coolly invited him in. she was dressed in beautiful silk robes of light lavender, with a small but tasteful diamond necklace on. Harry fell greatly under dressed in his simple jeans and T-shirt, he was very glad that Draco was wearing a button up top, not only because it looked formal, but also because it's high neck conceded Draco's collar.
The interior was just as impressive as the exterior, and Harry felt humbled as he was led though to a parlour. He had felt that his pent house flat was luxurious, but this had true class and made his place just look gaudy.
He exiled himself to the far side of the room, looking out of the window, not wanting to intrude on the reunion. But he did turn around in amazement when the conversation suddenly turned to…French? Possibly, it clearly wasn't English.
And then Draco stood up and left, and Harry was alone wth Narcissa. He gulped.
"mr. Potter, I must thank you for allowing me to see my son." She said coolly. She did not believe that a mother and son should ever be forcefully separated, but she knew who had the power in the room, and it was not her. She must be polite.
"not at all Ms. Malfoy. I take it that… you know I was under a curse?" He said nervously
"yes." She said simply. And I can tell it's no longer on you, she thought. The skittish boy that stood in front of her was nothing like the crude, powerful man that had once forced her to…
But never mind about that now, she couldn't have her son back, but maybe she could protect him…maybe.
"French was his first language." She informed him silkily. "really?" Harry asked, interested despite his nerves. "mmm, we went there every summer. He was born there actually."
"what was he like, when he was younger?" Narcissa didn't smile, although she wanted too, this Harry was so easy to manipulate.
"very lively. Very artistic. He used to love dancing particularly. Wanted to be a ballerina actually." A lump came to Harry's throat, he could really see Draco doing that. He had such grace, such poise… and somehow it didn't surprise Harry that Draco would love the stage, the spotlight… actually, it was perfect for him.
"although" Narcissa continued. " I doubt he will ever realise that dream. Not that he wasn't good enough, he was, and he worked so very hard. But…well, with all the injuries he has sustained, he will probably never be well enough."
Harry visibly flinched and turned away from her. She sneered for a second at his back, he should feel terrible, should feel like scum because he was. She took a deep breath and reminded herself that she wasn't trying to punish Harry, not yet, just… encourage him to treat Draco like the prince he was.
" you may want to take him to the ballet yourself," and then she couldn't help but add "for a treat." Again, Harry jerked, feeling the stab at his guilt. See rolled her eyes and backed off slightly. "We always used to go the see the nut cracker every Christmas. He liked that. Giselle was his favourite ballet of all time though."
Harry had never even heard of any ballets, let alone someone having a favourite. And again he felt dwarfed by their sophistication.
"okay… I, um, will see what is on at the moment." " I'm sure Draco will appreciate it." She said. "assuming of course he is strong enough to go."
But with that she seemed to have crossed a line, Harry looked upset yes, but angry as well. He glared at her and opened his mouth to speak- but luckily, it was at that point Draco made his entrance.
He was carrying a large photo album, and set it down on his mother's lap. But she handed it to Harry. " I thought you might like to look at this." she also thought it would do no harm to remind him of Draco's humanity. He said he had changed, but she felt certain she would never trust him again.
"excuse me and my son," she said, putting just a little emphasis on the word 'son'. " we will go and make sure that the house elves are preparing lunch properly."
Harry nodded and opened the album. God, Draco had always been beautiful. Here he was, a smiling, hopeful six-year old, playing on a pebble beach. And in another photo, playing the piano on the lap of a much younger Severus.
It seemed he had been taught these things- French, music, dancing, probably more- ever since he had been born. Harry supposed that was just the pure blood way…
He felt tears prick at the back of his eyes. How could he have wasted all that? Wiped it from Draco's memory? It was a tragedy. He knew well his guilt, but that didn't stop it from almost crushing him.
He looked at another photo, a grinning Draco, his first tooth missing. And again he looked so innocent… Harry resolved to fix this no matter what, even if he had to break into the ministry, forget every law ever written, get a time turner go back and kill himself. He would do it if he had too.
Lunch for Harry was stiff and formal, but for mother and son it was warm and welcome. They chatted away happily in French. Draco not knowing that his master couldn't understand, Narcissa not caring. There was a lull in the conversation and Harry broke in;
"umm…where is Mr. Malfoy?" Ms. Malfoy turned cold eyes on him. "he…passed away, not long after Draco left." Harry's eyes went wide and he dropped his fork with a clatter. But that didn't matter, he looked quickly to Draco, who he didn't seem to care, didn't seem to connect his father to himself.
For once Harry was glad he couldn't remember; he wouldn't have to feel grief.
" I sent you an owl, but you refused it." She said simply, before turning back to Draco and saying something else in French.
And then they were rising, and Harry did too, just because he assumed he should. Draco turned to Harry and Blushed, saying; "would you like to see the grounds master?"
Harry nodded and Draco led him out a back door. The grounds were breath taking, there was a large knot garden, bright with flowers and lush with bushes. In the centre of that was a huge fountain. But beyond this were rolling hills and acres of land, in the distance there was a lake as well.
Draco slowly reached out to Harry and took his hand. He wasn't sure if he was allowed too, in fact he didn't think he was, but there was something about this place that made him feel safe, so he took the chance. And he was glad he did, because Harry smiled at him, and smiled back.
"shall we see the lake, master?" he boldly offered. Harry grinned wider, before giving an ecstatic "yes!" he loved how forward Draco had suddenly become. They slowly made their way to the lake, mostly in silence, Harry just admiring the beauty of the grounds and Draco remembering…things.
They got to the lake and slipped into the water. To be honest Harry had no idea what he was doing, but he followed Draco's lead, slipping of his own cloths as the other boy did. Then the cool water was all around them and Draco tilted his head back towards the sun, his eyes closed.
And they played, just played. It was wonderful, they laughed and dived under the cool waters.
Draco never forgot to call him master, but he did start a splash fight, which Harry happily let him win. They played until too tired and numb from the cold- it was October after all- and then they rose from the water. They dressed silently, both deep in thought.
"race you back to the manor." Harry offered and Draco grinned at him, before suddenly sprinting off, not waiting for harry to say 'go'. Harry laughed and ran after him, it was a close match and if Harry hadn't been watching Draco's fine body move, seeing the sun on his skin, the smile on his lips…in short if he had been paying attention, he would probably have won, but it was close all the same.
They came back into the manor, and suddenly harry was very cold and rather embarrassed. Narcissa Malfoy was still in her regal robes while Harry and Draco stood before her, dripping water all over the marble floor and breathing hard.
But Draco was grinning and that was all she had eyes for. She remembered a time, just like this, long ago now, except it was Pansy Parkingson and Balise Zambini next to her Draco. They always used to play together, and others too, all the pureblood children running through the house…so long ago. She never thought she would be able to see her baby smiling, playing again. She thought that had ended when the dark lord came back…
Harry and Draco left soon after, and Narcissa closed the door behind them, a little confused and a little scared. Had it really been Harry Potter with him, looking so young, so sweet? Harry Potter of all people, playing with him. Making him happy?
She hated that man, she really did, for taking her child and breaking him. But a little part loved him too, because he was putting him back together again… saving him.
Harry and Draco aperated home, still soaking wet, and landed in the hall. Harry crushed Draco in an embrace and smiled into his ear. "I had a great day today baby." He said. " me two master." Harry smiled and continued. "really great, I mean you…you were so lovely today…" he took a deep breath. "you know, you don't have to wear that collar." Harry wasn't totally sure if this was the right time, but he thought it might be. Draco had been so good today, so forward…for him anyway.
There was a silence.
"what do you mean master?" Draco slowly asked, a small ball of terror growing inside of him.
" I mean…well, you won't always be my slave… and maybe we can take your collar off to signify that" Draco felt as if the world had disappeared from under him, Harry's embrace the only thing that kept him upright.
" I wont master?" he said, fighting to keep his voice even. "no…" Harry said, "but we don't have to worry about that now." Oh thank god, Draco thought, almost crying in relief.
"Not for a little while." Harry just wanted to plant the seed in Draco's mind really, but then Draco hadn't had a meltdown, so maybe he was more ready than Harry thought…
Harry broke away from him and wondered though to their bedroom to change his wet clothes, not registering Draco's horror. Mutely, Draco followed him, changing into pale blue robes.
He wondered listlessly out of the room. Not be Master's slave? Then what would he be? Nothing, he wouldn't be anything if he wasn't master's…. how would that even work? Not be master's? It didn't seem to comply with the rules of the universe. Maybe he would just die, without master.
He touched his collar, his wonderful collar. He was proud of it, the only thing in the world he was proud of. He didn't want to be without it, ever, not even in death.
And how long was " a little while"? Draco shivered, but a sort of calm came over him. A little while didn't sound like a long time. And he never wanted his collar to go away. But he couldn't fight master for it, could he? No, that would only prove to Master he was unworthy and make master deprive him of it sooner.
He walked though the rooms until he came to the balcony. He slid the door open and was hit with a blast of cold air and noise from the city below. He looked for a moment before heading out it and standing on the low marble wall that edged the balcony.
He wasn't afraid. He would comforted, in away. If he did this, he would never have to know what it was like to live without Master and he could have his collar. It was logical, he only wished he could have met who ever his replacement would be, make sure they were good enough…
He lifted one foot off of the cold rock and held it out over the street below. It was very far down, the people looked like ants. He took a deep breath.
But the draft and the noise must have altered Harry because he wondered curiously into the room, and felt his heart stop. There, Draco stood, looking like an angel in those light blue robes, framed by a golden sun. One foot hug over the edge, the other firmly on the ground.
And then he jumped, for one second his body curved in a graceful arch, before plummeting out of sight.
It was not Draco's screams, but Harry's that followed his body down.