Hey guys, sorry this didn't get put up yesterday, site was down. But here it is. It's not very long, but the next chap is and its super filled with drama - so review and I'll update it faster!!! (still isn't complete, but your reviews will get me to hurry.)

Thanks to everyone that reviewed, thanks Angel my awesome beta - check out her stories they are in my fav's.

13. Beautiful Angel 2

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EPOV

I didn't sleep well at all last night, every time I closed my eyes I would see Bella's smile, or the frightened expression she wore when James first entered the house. Both images caused my stomach to twist and a lump to form in my throat but only the second caused my fists to clench. She was definitely afraid when he had come around and the thought almost caused me to double over in anger and worry, what was she afraid of? Was it of him? Was it in anticipation of his reaction towards me?

The latter I could deal with, but if she was afraid of him, I wanted to know why, more than that I wanted him to pay for whatever he had done to bring about that fear. I couldn't help but wonder if he had hurt her in some way. I knew I was meant to forget about Isabella Swan but it was impossible. If I wasn't thinking about her I was dreaming about her. My dreams were so vivid they felt almost real. When I woke I was at a loss as to the emptiness I felt when I realised that my arms weren't actually wrapped around her warm and fragile body, or that my lips weren't pressed softly against her forehead. It hurt to realise that the soft words she had spoken to me were created by my subconscious that I couldn't actually smell or feel her—that she wasn't really mine.

It was obvious that I had fallen for the chocolate eyed angel; she was all I could think about when I wasn't in her presence and then all I could look at when I was. Jasper was right; I was going to cause more trouble if I kept up the insane hope that she would somehow become mine, but I couldn't help it. I sighed internally at the hopelessness of the situation. I was doomed. It made me think of the song "You're Beautiful" by James Blunt;

'There must be an angel with a smile on her face,
When she thought up that I should be with you.

But it's time to face the truth; I will never be with you.'

The song seemed to fit us perfectly; I rolled over and took out my frustrations on my sheets. I wanted to make Bella belong to me, I wanted her more than anything I had ever wanted but I couldn't have her. I was forbidden to. But it didn't seem fair, there was something between us, a connection I could feel whenever I was around her. It was a connection that was only reinforced when I held her in my arms where she seemed to fit so perfectly. I was certain that she had to feel it too, she had leaned into my touch yesterday and even my embrace the day before, there was definitely something there for her too—I was sure of it, I just had to convince her of it; make her see. Maybe if I could, she would leave James and be with me. It was all that I could hope for. I had to make her mine. James Blunts lyrics continued to play in my head.

'I saw an angel. Of that I'm sure.

She smiled at me on the subway.

She was with another man.

But I won't lose no sleep on that, cause I've got a plan.'

I shook my head at the thought. It was unfair of me to do that to her, she belonged to someone else. I had no right to take her from him. I could only stand in the shadows and hope that one day she would choose me instead. He didn't deserve her but I couldn't really argue that I did instead. But I knew that I would treat her how she deserved but I still didn't know if I was good enough for someone so pure, selfless and beautiful.

I groaned and rolled out and sat on my bed, I was pathetic. I was in a new town where there were plenty of good looking girls and I had to be hung up on the one girl I couldn't have. I hopped off my bed and threw on an old t-shirt before I went over to my desk to turn on my computer – hoping to find a distraction from all that was Bella.

I checked my emails and found that I had an email from a girl I had dated back in my home town but called it quits before I moved here. I wasn't lying when I said no one had ever caught my eye before – until now. No one had, however I had had my fair share of girlfriends, mostly set ups with girls I didn't really like but people said I should date. Heidi was one of those. I only dated her due to pressure and convenience; everyone thought we would be great together and we were friends. We only went on one date, to sophomore prom, true we had a really good time, but I liked her only as a friend there was no real attraction there. I admit that Heidi was a very good looking girl and I would even go as far as to say she was a brunette version of Rosalie. But like Rosalie she wasn't my type; I wasn't into girls that knew how hot they were, they tended to be bitches and treat guys like crap. Needless to say I didn't really want to continue dating Heidi, so I was glad when we moved and I could sight long distance as a reason for discontinuing our relationship.

I didn't reply to Heidi's email, I didn't know what to say—I had nothing to say. She talked about how much she missed me and wished we could get back together, that she wanted to come and visit – they were all feelings that I did not share and could not reciprocate when my heart belonged to someone else.

On Facebook I noticed that Alice and Bella had become friends and that Alice had put up photos of their girly day yesterday – why do girls always take photos of everything? It wasn't long before I was staring at the pictures Bella was in; analysing her every expression. In some of them she hid behind a pillow which made me mad, she shouldn't hide her face from the world, it wasn't fair. In others she was laughing and the sight caused my heart warm, she was beautiful when she smiled but when she laughed it was entirely another story. Her nose and eyes crinkled up it the cutest way; I found myself stroking her cheek on the screen and smiling to myself, wishing that I really was touching her, that she was smiling at me. In turn some of the pictures made me a little sad, when her smile didn't quite reach her eyes, in these she looked a little distant, withdraw and upset, I longed to comfort that Bella, to cradle her in my arms and hide her from the big bad world. But then there were photos that truly crushed me and turned my heart to stone, they were ones she wasn't really aware of, they showed her true emotions. In them she looked sad, tired and depressed, it took all my effort not to run to her house and take her in my arms, protecting her from whatever made her feel this way.

It saddened me to know that someone at our age had to suffer through everything that Bella had to. When she talked about Jess it was agonising, her face would crumple and her body would fold in on itself subconsciously. I didn't know if she was really aware of the fact that she would fold her arms across her stomach and hugged her sides, as if she were trying to hold herself together. What was happening to her friend was destroying her. She looked so broken and fragile; her vulnerability tore at my heart. She deserved to be happy, she was young and beautiful, selfless and pure, and nothing or no one should be causing her this pain. She was brave and rarely worried about herself, she confronted the monster who had hurt her friend and also her boyfriend when he became violent, she was truly an amazing creature, I couldn't help but fall for her; she was endearing. Bella's compassion for her friend was admirable, I couldn't understand how her friend Jess could hurt herself the way she did, to me it seemed selfish because it was clearly hurting her friend and her boyfriend. But then again who was I to judge? I hadn't been through what Jess had, I couldn't imagine the pain she was feeling and we all have our different ways of coping with pain and hopeless situations. I was sitting here pining for a girl I couldn't have, torturing myself by looking at pictures of her and silently hoping that she would become mine.

My fists were rolled into tight balls and I brought them to my temples, willing the anger I felt for the situation to subside. I wanted her out of my head, I couldn't think, couldn't breathe - without thinking about Bella. I looked back up at the screen at my favourite picture of her. She was laughing at Alice who was pretending to lick her cheek. "Poser," I muttered to myself, referring solely to Alice.

"You talking about me big brother?" an annoying little pixie called from my doorway. Alice was standing there with her arms folded trying her hardest to look mad. She stormed her way over noticing for the first time the picture on my screen, I wasn't able to close it off fast enough.

"She looks really pretty in the picture," Alice commented. "Don't you think?" I pushed myself away from the computer pretending to look indifferent.

"I guess," I replied shrugging my shoulders; I couldn't help but to feel angry with myself for the way I acted, Bella deserved better, she was beautiful beyond words. Alice turned to look at me raising her eyebrow; her voice was soft when she spoke.

"You've got it bad, don't you?" she asked, staring at my face trying to gauge my expression. She looked worried. I didn't know how to respond but I knew that my silence and behaviour wasn't doing me any favours, Alice would know – actually it seemed like she already did; she usually had a sixth sense for these kinds of things. I slumped down on my bed and groaned, pinching the bridge of my nose, there was no sense in denying it – I was in love with Isabella Swan.

"Real bad," I admitted, throwing my body back on the bed, I pulled a pillow over my face waiting for the berating that was sure to ensue. I felt Alice lie down next to me on the bed; she pulled the pillow from my face and looked appraisingly at me.

"You can't..." she started. I shook my head silencing her; I didn't need her to tell me out loud that I couldn't have Bella.

"Don't you think I already know that?"

"Why her?" she asked, I couldn't help it when my hands curled into fists. I looked at Alice as if she was insane – why not her? I thought harshly. Wasn't it obvious how amazing she was? How perfect and unique and beautiful she was? Alice took in my expression of utter disgust and outright anger but decided to continue with her lecture anyway.

"You heard Jazz yesterday Edward, she is taken, you are just creating trouble by continuing this obsession." She looked at me sternly, daring me to deny the truth behind her words. It was true being in love with Bella had already created enough trouble and if I did continue with this it was enviably going to get worse. Bella was worth fighting for and James had already proved that he would.

"You need to stop this Edward, there are other girls, safer girls," she continued.

"I can't help how I feel Alice," I sighed. "I've tried forgetting about her but I can't, she's always in here," I said taping my fingers to my head.

She growled at me, "You. Have. To." She paused after every word for emphasis. This made me mad, sure I was in love with someone I shouldn't be, but I couldn't help it. Alice was being unfair.

"Are you in love with Jasper?" I questioned, turning to face her, hoping to get her to understand the impossibility of the situation.

"Yes." She spoke slowly confused by the question. "Where's this going Edward?" she demanded.

"What if he was taken Alice and you still felt the same way? And what if you thought his girlfriend didn't deserve him; what if you thought that maybe she had hurt him in some way?" I stared at her desperately begging her to understand how I felt.

"That's a lot of what ifs," she whispered clearly mulling over what I had just said.

"I guess I would be in the same situation you are in now," she conceded. "But I would wait for him, and hope that maybe I could be with him. I wouldn't want to cause him any trouble like you are causing Bella," she added.

"I don't want to, but I can't help it if I think he is doing wrong by her," I moaned.

"Bella is a big girl Edward, if he is treating her badly I am sure she will make the decision to leave him," Alice rested her hand on mine and looked me directly in the eye. "But you have to let her make that decision on her own." She stood up to leave, indicating that this was an end of discussion moment and nothing I could say would make her think any differently.

"Give her space Edward, if it's meant to be she will be yours," she added as she left the room.

Even though I didn't want to admit it Alice was right, if I didn't leave Bella alone I was bound to cause her more trouble which would mean I would run the risk of her resenting me, or her getting hurt more in the process. All I could do was hope that Alice was right and that if it was meant to be we would end up together. I knew in my heart that we were meant for each other, I just had to hope that Bella would realise it too and hopefully soon, I didn't know how long I could hold out for her without losing my mind completely.

Alice had officially convinced me to give Bella her space and I would – as long as she didn't need me I would stay away. But, I promised myself. If she does need me, I will be there for her; I don't give a stuff what everyone else thinks and if I have to take James down in the process of protecting her, so be it. I will do anything for Bella – she is my beautiful angel. She is worth the fight.

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