A King Ponders

Chapter 4

Zan pulled away from her again panting breathlessly and he locked his passion filled eyes on hers. Liz let out a gasp when she looked back at him. What she saw almost made her fall apart right then and there in his arms.

The love that was radiating from his eyes was intense and beautiful; emanating across his ruggedly handsome face.

She knew right then and there that she would not be able to stop herself even if she gave it her best shot.

Zan was in control.

Zan's hands were trembling as he was caressing Liz. His hands had made their way under her shirt to the silky skin on her back. With his big hands splayed he desperately tried to touch as much skin as possible with each embrace.

He moved from underneath her shirt, and he cupped Liz's face with both hands. Running his thumbs over her cheeks while drinking in her delicate features.

He felt the surge of a vibrating energy flow from Liz through the connection, and it jolted him like he had been hit by a bolt of lightning; sending a blissful sexual charge buzzing throughout his body.

His eyes turned wild, and he growled when he heard her breathe out his name. Not being able to endure anymore, he said with a raspy voice, "Liz, I need you. I need to make love to you."

Liz, closed her eyes and let out a sensual sigh, and then nodded her consent. That was all he needed.

His lips came crashing down on to her lips and he kissed her with every bit of passion he was feeling. The emotional walls that he had built so strong for protection; the walls that he hid behind; started to teeter; threatening to fall down around him.

He wanted to show her the things he couldn't say with his voice. Liz wanted answers, and he wanted to give them to her.

Zan, backed Liz over to her bed. He nibbled and sucked at her lower lip the way he always wanted to do in his fantasies. Zan was interrupted when a sense of his own apprehension start to rise, but he managed to push it down. He considered just letting things take its course and accept the end result.

He knew that the flashes would start the minute he began to make love to Liz. He didn't know how Liz would react to them. Would she run from him? Would she embrace the knowledge he was about to reveal to her? Would she look at his life and his heart through the flashes and accept him completely for who he really was? Could she still love him knowing the truth about him being an alien?

This is the one time Zan felt like a coward. The thought of running away from Liz crossed his mind, but doing so would only confirm that he was a coward.

Zan chastised himself, 'I'm a fuckin' King of a whole planet. I have alien power in my hands. I'm not afraid of anybody or anything'…..closing his eyes he mentally sagged and admitted, 'except for little Liz Parker.'

Zan started to cool off, and Liz was aware of this.

"Zan, what's wrong?" she asked.

He just shook his head and turned his eyes away from her. He wanted to prolong the inevitable. He was going to have to tell her the truth before he could ever touch her the way he longed to touch her. Zan avoided eye contact as he felt her looking at him confused.

Liz was afraid that Zan would withdraw back inside himself like he so often did when he was a young boy. He always recoiled back inside himself when communicating his feelings to her became difficult. Liz felt that if it was in her power to do so that she would not let him dance around the subject this time. She wanted Zan in every way, and wanted to know what was in his heart.

"Zan? Please, you can tell me, Please." Liz said.

Zan knew that she loved him, he felt it through the connection. He wouldn't be satisfied with things until he opened up his side of the connection letting it flow from him to her, but he was afraid.

Zan was in love with Liz. He had never loved anyone but her. Even when she went away all those years ago, he never stopped loving her. His love for Liz burned in the background like a small pilot light that was ready to ignite a flame at his bidding. He kept this tiny flame tucked away safe in his heart. It was fueled by the memories of Liz and the fantasies that Zan often had during his quiet times. Being near her now, and holding her in his arms, the tiny flame threatened to ignite an all-consuming fire storm.

Zan looked into Liz's pleading eyes. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He was going to do it. After all these years he was going to tell Liz the truth. Let her know who he really was. What he was able to do with his powers. How he had gotten to her house and suddenly appeared at her bedroom door. He was going to share the details of his destiny. He was going to tell her the truth.

He knew his story would shock Liz if she chose to believe him. He knew for sure it would capture the scientific side of Liz and she would not run away. At least until she satisfied her curiosity by asking him a million questions. He just didn't know if her heart could love an alien that hatch from a pod deep down in the sewers of New York City.

"Liz, let's take a seat," he sighed pointing towards the bed.

"Okay," she answered sitting next to him.

Zan closed his eyes tight not knowing how to start. His hands were trembling and he felt nervous. He rubbed his hands over his face roughly and puffed out a loud breath as he stalled.

'Hellfire, I don't get nervous. This fuckin' love is going to kill me,' he scoffed to himself.

Liz took her hand and placed it gently on his thigh and looked at him and softly said, "Zan, you know that you can trust me. I love you, Zan. I always have. You can tell me anything, okay?" She said encouragingly.

Zan swallowed hard, then said a little too loudly, "Okay," then jumped to his feet.

He began to pace. With his jaw clinching, and nerves on edge, he stopped abruptly and turned to Liz and said, "Liz, I have a confession to make."

Liz's eyes went wide and she answered slowly giving him a hopeful look, "O…kay."

"No Liz, you can't say anything until I'm finished talking. Promise me that you will listen to me until I've told you everything. Promise me, Liz." He said in a tone that almost sounded like a command.

"I promise, Zan," she answered seriously.

"Okay then. Here we go." Zan looked away from her; closed his eyes; blew out a breath, and quickly turned to look at Liz with an unsettling seriousness.

"Liz, what I am about to tell you may influence whether you can love me or not." He began.

"Hell, it may influence whether or not you'll want to be in the same room with me," he murmured.

"Zan, please, it's okay. Say what you need to say," she encouraged again.

"Liz, the things that I've told you about myself were not completely true," he looked away so he wouldn't see her face fall with disappointment.

"Liz, I'm an alien," Zan blurted out.

"I was aboard the ship that crashed in Roswell, NM in the year 1947, I hadn't been born yet when the ship crashed."

He went on to tell her everything that Kal Langley had revealed to him when he met with Kal. How Zan and his family were alien royalty. That Zan was a King. Zan went through all the details about the murder on the distant planet, the DNA mixed to create hybrids, and as a result of those things he was now on the planet Earth.

Liz started to say something and Zan quickly reminded her of her promise to wait until he finished his story. She remained quiet not sure how to respond to what Zan was telling her.

Zan went on to explain how he, his brother, and sisters were in pods and that's why they survived the crash. He told her how their pods were placed in the sewers by a protector. He went into detail how they each came out of a pod as a newborn looking like a five or six year old child. How they could walk, but they didn't know how to talk.

He told her that they communicated through a connection that they all shared after coming out of the pods. The four aliens no longer shared that connection once they learned how to verbally communicate. It just kind of fizzled out. He used that information as an opportunity to segue to the topic of his and Liz's connection.

Before he continued he looked over at her face to gauge her expression, trying to see if she was doing okay with the information that he was sharing. At this point he had not actually 'felt' any indication of what she was feeling.

What was she feeling? What is that look on her face? Then he 'felt' it coming across the connection; a hint of amusement.

'Well fuck me! She doesn't believe a fuckin' word I'm saying,' Zan scoffed to himself as he cast her an incredulous expression.

It frustrated him and made him feel stupid at the same time. Simply stated, he was not happy. The (somewhat) pleading look that he had on his face while he was sharing his life with her was morphing into an angry scowl.

"Here I am telling you the most intimate fuckin' details of my whole fuckin' existence, and you, you sit there fuckin' laughing at me!' Zan blared out at Liz.

"Fuck all of this, I'm out of here!" he said turning on his heels about to march out of the house.

"Zan! No! Don't go," Liz responded as she hurriedly took hold of his arm.

Zan stopped in his tracks, he didn't say anything he just looked straight ahead. Although he was furious, he needed to hear what she had to say. This had placed him a vulnerable position. He felt like she held all the cards. He did not like this feeling at all. Where was Zan's cool control?

"Zan. I know you are angry with me right now, but think about how you would react if you were in my position, and I were the one telling you that story. Wouldn't you require a little more proof?" she implored seriously. She didn't think it was unreasonable to ask for proof.

Zan looked at her, and then a smirk curled up the side of his mouth.

"Your position? OH, I'll give you proof alright." He chuckled.

Zan let go of the walls that were blocking his side of the connection, and let them come tumbling down all at once. He grabbed Liz into his arms and pressed his lips hard against hers and let the connection crash into her at full force. It started out as an angry kiss, but as he received flashes from her he became more serene and gentle.

She felt him flowing through every inch of her body; his presence and his scent. She felt like her reality had shifted and she was caught up in a wormhole flying back through time; reliving sweet moments of a time in the past that she had spent with Zan.

She could feel how much he loved her when he was so young.

It hurt Liz when she had to leave New York and go back to Roswell to rejoin her parents. Zan never showed up to tell her goodbye. She now knows what happened.

Zan was there. He was standing in the shadows with tear tracks running down his face and big tears were dripping from his chin. Liz could feel his young heart breaking into pieces as he watched 'his sweet Lizzy' get into a car and ride away. His only friend in the world was leaving him.

She felt what he felt tonight when he opened the bedroom door and saw that it was her, his Lizzy, sitting on the bed.

She felt his desire, passion, and yearning to make love to her. He let her see how important he thought it was that she knew the truth about him. She understood his fear of telling her about his life, and how vulnerable he felt. Most of all, she felt how much he loves her more than his own life.

Zan broke the connection. Liz closed her eyes and let her body go limp in Zan's arms. She was processing all that had just happened between them. What had just happened to her? She wanted to make sense of all the things that she saw through their connection. How did she see into Zan's soul? She would get answers later. She lingered on the sensation that was pulsing through her body.

What she felt was both amazing and breathtaking. Zan was beautiful. His heart was beautiful.

"Oh…Zan, you are my Zan," Liz sighed as she looked into his eyes and touched his face. "Zan, I love you. I love you so much."

At first Zan just stared at how beautiful she looked, and he was taking in how wonderful it felt to hold her.

He heard her whimper in a pleading tone, "Zan, please."

The sound of her voice further aroused Zan. He slowly closed his eyes, and when he opened them they were black as onyx. The connection was wide open now, and Zan knew exactly what Liz wanted from him.

Zan let out a jagged breath while thinking just how willing he was to give Liz exactly what she wanted.

TBC