The next night I zipped over to Mistress' chamber as fast as my feet would go. Alucard was standing in front of her door with his standard-issue smirk.

"Good, I was expecting you; come on in and see," he urged.

I poked my head in the door before I stepped in. There, on her bed, was Mistress, exactly the same as when I had left her the night before. The only change was the swirling black mist; it had gotten bigger and darker.

"Shouldn't Mistress have woken up by now?" I asked worriedly.

"I suppose she'll need a bit of 'assistance'." Alucard stroked his chin.

"I'm not sure I follow."

"How does one traditionally awaken a sleeping maiden?"

I felt the blood drain out of my face. No way, man. No frickin' way. I looked at Alucard again and saw his smirk grow even more as he nodded.

"I weel handle zat!"

Oh no.

I turned my head and growled when I saw Pip silhouetted in the doorway. He had exchanged his uniform for a charcoal suit. He was carrying a box of chocolates in his right hand and attempting to tame his hair with his left.

"What're you doing here?" I demanded.

"I am here to provide ze 'assistance' Alucard mentioned."

"Over my dead body."

"Freshmeat, you are dead," Alucard observed.

"I have no time for zees. I am coming mon cherie, you shall awaken by my burning lips!" Pip rushed forward.

As he passed me, I cold-cocked him on the back of his head. He stumbled before collapsing in a heap. Grabbing him by the scruff of his neck and the seat of his pants, I hurled him out the door like a bouncer would handle a rowdy drunk. I picked up the box of chocolates and threw them after him.

"I really don't like that guy," I grunted.

"Really? I couldn't tell," Alucard said in mock surprise, "well let's get back to business. You have a job to do, Freshmeat."

"But why can't you do it?"

"Because I told you to do it."

"Well, I can't... that is..."

"Just get to it or we'll be here all night."

I swallowed and stepped forward timidly. How do I do this? Should I keep my eyes open or close them? Oh man why me? I bent low still not sure what exactly to do. When I was millimeters away, Mistress' eyes sprang open.

"What exactly do you think you're doing?" she demanded.

"Um... I was... Alucard said to... oh no," I stammered.

I turned around and saw Alucard shaking with laughter. He was soon rolling on the floor, laughing so hard he couldn't stand up.

"Priceless, Freshmeat absolutely priceless. The look on your face...you actually believed..." he trailed off.

"You planned this! Master, that's not funny!" Mistress fumed.

Alucard's mirth evaporated as he spoke to Mistress. This guy's mood swings are worse than a pregnant woman's.

"Police Girl, you are now true Nosferatu. I am no longer your master. You can begin to gain the incredible power of the night. Shapeshifting, hypnosis, telekinesis, you possess them all. Now you must..."

Walter's voice crackled over the intercom system before Alucard could finish.

"Alert, we have a report of numerous freaks attacking a village in Northern Ireland. I repeat, numerous freaks in Northern Ireland. Squads V, E, and C report to the helipad. Chinook helicopter departing in fifteen minutes."

"Police Girl, you and Freshmeat get your equipment and go; I'll finish this later."

I rushed to my room and strapped Hackmaster on my back and Boomstick at my waist. I rejoined Mistress in the main entrance hall and we arrived at the helipad with five minutes to spare. Soon the rotors roared to life and we lifted off. Sir Integra was standing at the head of the crew compartment with a projector screen and a laser pointer.

"At approximately seven thirty two this evening, a funeral service for this town's mayor was interrupted by a sudden freak attack. A few panicked phone calls have given us all the intel we have at the moment. There are an unknown number of freaks and a large number of ghouls to deal with." A floor plan of the church appeared on the screen and Sir Integra indicated each point as she spoke. "Squads C and E will cover the rear doors and advance gradually, not moving on until each room has been cleansed. Squad V, that's you Mr. Nate and Miss Seras, will head in the main doors and meet the freaks head on. Are there any questions?"

"Sir Integra, I'm wondering, are you sure it's safe for you to be going on this mission?" I asked. "Not only do we have vampires to deal with, but this is Northern Ireland we're talking about! They don't exactly like Protestants there, last I checked."

"That's exactly why I'm going. If we're discovered, I'm going to handle any diplomatic issues that may arise," Sir Integra explained patiently.

There were no other questions so the remainder of the trip was silent but for the steady, muted thump of the helicopter's twin rotors. When we finally landed everyone but Sir Integra marched out the cargo hatch in double file. The human troops split up towards the rear of the church while Mistress and I hastened to the main entrance.

When we were within thirty yards, several windows on the upper floor shattered and ghouls opened fire. Their clumsy aim made for little real danger, so I reached the doors and flung them open dramatically. I was disappointed that there wasn't anything there but a few scraps of paper stuck to the wall with a knife. What, did they run out of push pins? I almost tore it off to look closer, but I decided to wait, I had a job to do.

More gunfire echoed down the hall, and I rushed towards it. I eased a door open and tiptoed in, bringing Boomstick into firing position. A vampire was looming over an old man who appeared to be trying to protect a group of small children. A pair of bullet-ridden bodies lay behind him.

"I have no interest in your overripe blood, old man. Let me at those children and I'll let you live," the bloodsucker offered.

"Never! I will protect these children with my li-gahhhk..."

He never finished his sentence because the vampire gripped his neck and tore his throat out barehanded. The old man's blood spewed outwards, staining the vampire's clothing and some even landed on the horror-struck children.

"GRAMPA!" a little girl screamed and rushed forward. The vampire grabbed the girl by the hair and hoisted her to his eye level.

"Don't worry child, you'll be seeing him soon enough," he chortled wickedly.

"Put the girl down, you monster!" I demanded.

"Who are you? A cop? Or just some unlucky idiot?" he sneered.

"Neither. I'm here to make sure you take a long dirt nap."

"I'm glad there's someone else here; I could use an appetizer."

The vampire leapt forward, fangs bared. I dodged to the left and slammed my right fist into his stomach. He fell to the ground and retched. He stood up, huffed angrily, and charged until I kneed him in the stomach; he fell to the ground.

"You make me sick. Not only do you murder in cold blood, but you force children to witness your atrocity. On top of that, you'd slaughter them with no remorse! You'll receive no forgiveness or mercy from me. DIE!" I pressed Boomstick to his nose and pulled both triggers. A heavy slug and a cloud of buckshot reduced his head to bloody pulp and he turned to dust.

I stepped over to the old man's corpse and closed his still-staring eyes. The sight of his blood entranced me, the aroma made me...hungry. I whipped my head towards the shaking children. These kids are helpless; they're so young. I'll just have one, that's all. I've never had fresh blood... I snapped out of my trance, grabbed my head in both hands and howled. What the hell are you doing? What kind of monster are you? You just saved those kids to murder them yourself? Get a grip!

I escorted the children to the door and ordered them to run to the chopper. I sensed a veritable miasma of evil in the main chapel. One hand on Boomstick and the other slamming the simple oaken door open, my eyes fell on a scene so hellish I wanted to scream out loud.

The pews were splintered and stained with spatters of blood. Dozens of ghouls crouched around horribly mutilated corpses, or parts of them, at least. The foul sounds of snapping bones and tearing flesh filled the air to the point that no one had noticed my entrance. A pair of vampires watched the carnage with their backs to me, enjoying the spectacle. I holstered Boomstick and hit the release for Hackmaster. Why waste ammo on these monsters? I held the grip tightly in both hands and lifted Hackmaster straight over my head.

"IN THE NAME OF GOD, IMPURE SOULS OF THE LIVING DEAD SHALL BE BANISHED INTO ETERNAL DAMNATION, AMEN!" I shouted fiercely.

They both turned around and Hackmaster descended on the leftmost freak and split him in two from his skull down. The floorboards beneath him splintered and cracked with the force of the blow. One half of the freak fell each way; spraying blood before turning to dust. Before I could make my next attack, the remaining freak sprang back and drew a large revolver.

"Impressive weapon you've got there; but you can't move that heavy thing fast enough to protect yourself. Rest in peace knowing you slew one vampire, human," the freak snorted before pulling the trigger three times.

Time seemed to slow down. I ducked beneath the first shot and raised Hackmaster to deflect the remaining two. I aimed Hackmaster's point at the freak's heart and sprang forward. His face barely had time to register his shock before the blessed silver pierced his chest and emerged through his back. I turned my attention to the still-feasting ghouls. As I switched from Hackmaster to Boomstick, the doors opposite me flew open with a crash.

"Weel noo; this is a fine mess," the man observed in a thick Irish accent.

Sorry about the delayed update. Cliffhanger at last! I'm grateful to all of my readers (if you're still there) and hope that you keep the R&R'ing coming.