For those of you who notice this before skipping to the latest chapter, everything's been rewritten for the heck of it. Minor details changed, so there's no real need to reread everything if you don't want to. Love you all!
Rating: T+
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Not even this laptop.
Chapter Title: Cravings
--Yuki—
You know that you haven't been looking into things as much as you should. You know that there are aspects you haven't been paying attention to, and with that, some things are slipping pas your notice. One thing is becoming increasingly clear, though: you are getting too comfortable.
The smaller things don't matter as much. Tohru and Shigure don't' seem to notice anything, even when you start a fight or stare at him in front of them. You doubt either of them would notice now, anyway, since you use to do that before as well (with moderation).
Actually, the problem doesn't even concern other people. It's just you with Kyo. You're starting to take the fact that you can kiss him without undergoing some sort of physical damage and the ever amazing fact that you've somehow gotten him to reciprocate for a given. Kissing him – the routine normality of it – leaves you content. More so that you should or even have the right to be. You get caught up, and more than once or twice he's snatched your wrist when you reach out to touch him. You're betraying your motives, outrageous as they might be, and you realize that instead of just getting nowhere, waiting for him to slip up as well, you just might end up back-tracking.
And now, after getting through lying to yourself, you must come to terms with your more underhanded side. You have been watching the weather. Not because you're worried about needing a raincoat. Not because you're wondering how team sports might go that day. And no, not because you've suddenly gained an interest in the patterns of weather that appear near your location in some aspiration to become a weatherman. No. You have been thinking (guiltily) about how you can get touching to be a part of that routine you've come to need.
Because you want to touch him. You're more familiar with the cravings of your own body than you've been before, and you're being almost strangely honest about them with yourself. Yes, you want to touch him. You don't want to only feel the roughness of his hands gripping your arms or the hardness of a wall at your back. You want to touch him – even if only a little – more sensually than you've been allowed thus far. You know, though, that this is a long shot. The probability that you'll only end up ruining everything is much higher, the chance that he'll simply allow it so very slim.
Therefore, the intention of watching the weather. The weaker he is, the more susceptible he'll be to your advancements.
You don't know why you're willing to take such a risk. Don't know why you would honestly consider to move things further along until you're possibly in over your head.
But hey, sometimes you surprise even yourself.
--Kyo—
You won't let him. You simply will not, cannot allow it. If he thinks he's going to get his way, he has another thing coming. It's not as if you aren't already intimate enough. It's not like you haven't touched enough. Not like you haven't both driven the other to suppressed shudders through kissing alone. Why go further into unknown territory – unsafe territory – when you were fine just the way you were? You don't want to touch him – to be expected to would be more than awkward, since you can't even imagine yourself doing so without drawing a complete blank and going red. The thought of him touching you has the same effect. It's frighteningly personal – hitting way to close to home for it to even be considered.
And, though the thought itself makes your head spin with self-destruction, you can't exactly say without kind-of-almost lying that you don't want it. As much as it completely embarrasses you to even think of, you realize through the complete mental disruption that you go through just kissing him that you do actually crave more skin-on-skin contact. The little touches that you do get, accidental or not, are already more prominent in your mind than they should be.
Not that any of that actually matters. You won't let anything happen. Can't imagine letting it happen. No matter how much he tries to slip by your defenses, you know that you will always (have to) shut him down. You can't make room for any of it, and can't afford to let things get any more out of control than they already are. No loopholes, or exceptions – that was just it.
--Shigure—
A challenge has come your way. A baffling, possibly non-existent challenge with possibly no real conclusion to draw, but a challenge nonetheless.
You have always prided yourself at being able to watch people with an all-seeing eye. You've always had a nose for human nature, and you study them critically, more than often correctly, through small personal explorations and confrontations. With this, you're able to keep track of every aspect of life around you. You don't miss things often, and even when you do, you can feel those little underlying signs that you have. An intuition tells you something in the air is off. Slip-ups happen. Secrets stand out vaguely within the normal way of things.
Well, your dog-senses are tingling, and they're flashing red lights around Yuki and Kyo.
The problem? You haven't much to go on. You can't tell if something happened between the two of them or if their personalities have shifted again. It happened when Tohru came. It's happened to Yuki since he's joined the student council, and Kyo since he's been more introduced to crowds of people. Human beings and their routines are so fickle – so easily changed without any inclination or apparent reason as to why that it's possible there hasn't been any significant happening at all. Not that you can see, anyway.
And that wherein lies the challenge.
So you get to studying. On one hand you have Kyo: bound to mood swings, impulsive in more ways in one, seemingly thick in some matters yet extremely fragile under personal circumstances. Things don't change him easily, you know. He has consistent behavior with most everything, and when it does change, it's usually noticeable right off the bat. The alterations you see in him don't indicate to anything too abnormal. He's become strangely stiff around Yuki. In the beginning, it was a bit more obvious, though you took no notice of it, and now it's lessened considerably, but it's still there. It could be that they had a fight. He could have heard a strange conversation, or even have caught the boy doing something –cough- private. He seems determined, somehow – sometimes frustrated – as if he were keeping something to himself, which comes as a surprise, since he's usually like an open book. There are too many options to consider though, and the figures don't add up to anything promising.
On the other hand, you have Yuki: rather controlled, when it came to his emotions, a little insightful when he tried, trained in keeping up a mask and, like Kyo, very delicate when it came to some personal matters. Changes in him don't come easily, either, though when they do come, they're not always easy to spot right off. The changes you see here are small, as well, but slightly more revealing than Kyo's. He stares at Kyo – more than he used to, at least – with a rather strange look bordering on curious – an innocent expression that you can't quite place. He doesn't seem aware of it himself, sometimes, and when he realizes it, he immediately looks away. It makes you wonder what on earth he's thinking about, but you can't guess just yet. Other than that, you've noticed him starting fights a lot more. He picks at the cat almost ruthlessly, but not blatantly outright – daring jabs that never fail to rile Kyo and are obviously intended for just that.
None of it gives you much headway, but you have enough to make a feasible connection between the two, and if that's what your instinct is telling you, that's what you're going to go on.
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