This is based on a prompt from narelclollie who wanted a story in which Oliver loses his memory but is still drawn to Felicity. Thanks for all the support, dear.
When Oliver first wakes up, he doesn't remember any of it. The fights, the deaths, the wins, the losses—she has to tell him everything later.
So, when he find himself in some sort of warehouse basement he doesn't recognize, surrounded by people he doesn't know, he doesn't react well. He flies off the metal table he was laying on and gets into a defensive crouch, knocking some boy in a red leather getup to the ground in the process.
"Whoa, watch it man," the kid says, standing up. "You weren't the only one who got—" he's stopped from whatever he was going to say by Oliver's fist connecting with his face, knocking him out cold.
"Oliver!" a blonde girl yelps, covering her mouth with her hands.
"Where am I?" he demands. "How do you know who I am?" The girl drops her hands, blinking in surprise a moment and then glances at the other man in the room, a tall black man Oliver suspects will be far more difficult to take out than the girl.
"You're in the foundry at Verdant, Oliver," the girl says slowly, putting her hands up as if to show she doesn't mean him any harm. "I'm Felicity Smoak, that's John Diggle and the guy you just put on the floor is Roy Harper," she explains, pointing to each in turn. "We're your partners. You don't remember us?"
"No," he replies, eyeing her and trying to decide if this is a trick of some kind. "The last things I remember is taking a boat off Lian Yu and getting on a plane to Starling City," he says, straightening up a bit but still ready to spring into action if need be. "Is that where we are? They said they would take me to the hospital when we landed and my mother would be there. Is she here?" The girl's eyes are wide and she swallows tightly before she speaks again.
"She's not here," she says and he notices a strange edge to her voice. "Oliver, I know this is going to sound crazy," she starts and takes a step toward him. Oliver tenses again and she freezes, surprised by the reaction, and then moves back. She gives him a sympathetic look and takes a deep breath before she speaks again.
"You've been back in Starling City for almost 3 years. We're currently in the basement of one of QC's old foundries. We," she pauses, pointing between them and the two other men in the room, "work together here to protect Starling City. John was your bodyguard before you had to tell him your secret. When you were first crossing names off your father's list." Oliver's surprised to hear she knows about that. It certainly gives what she's saying more credibility, but they could have tortured that out of him. "He used to provide back-up, but you haven't let him back in the field since Lyla, his...ex-wife?" She glances at this "John" seemingly for confirmation and he shrugs. She nods and continues with, "had the baby. I joined you guys a few months later, when your moth—when you were injured and came to me for help. Though I probably would have figured out you were the Hood eventually. For a guy who keeps so much secret, you are a terrible liar. There was this one time when you brought me these syringes—"
"Felicity," the other man interrupts, raising an eyebrow at her.
"Right," she says and nods. "Roy is your backup in the field. He's not as good as you with a bow, but he's pretty handy with most weapons. Which I think is the reason the news started calling him Arsenal, which I still think is a really weird nickname, honestly. It's not like you guys are using weapons with much firepower."
"That's all very interesting," Oliver interrupts, only partly sarcastic. The girl's rather charming rambling was a little too disarming. He'd relaxed his guard and failed to notice the other man putting himself between Oliver and the nearby weaponry until it was too late. "But how do I know any of what you're saying is true? I know what manipulation looks like. I need proof."
"Whatever you want," she replies, sounding slightly relieved.
"I want to see my mother," he says. "If she tells me I've been back in Starling City as long as you say, maybe I'll believe everything else."
"I can't do that," she says, looking stricken.
"Those are my terms," he replies, crossing his arms in front of his chest. The girl sighs and gives him a pained look.
"I wish I could, Oliver—"
"Nice try," he interrupts. "You tell Waller or whoever you're working for that this is a waste of time. I won't work for her again no matter what she threatens to do." The girl looks questioningly at the other man and he nods, expression grim.
"Maybe it will jog his memory," he says and then Oliver notices him reposition himself slightly closer to her, this Felicity.
"I'm so sorry to have to tell you this, but," she pauses, seeming to blink back tears, "your mother is dead."
"No," he growls, fists clenching at his sides. "That's not true. You're making excuses."
"I promise you I'm not," she says, pleading for him to believe her. "Slade killed her when—"
"You're lying!" he yells, flipping the metal table he was laying on earlier. "That's impossible. He's dead. How do you even know that name?" he demands. He lunges at her and she screams and just manages to move out of the way before he grabs her. Oliver tries again, but he's suddenly hit from the side as the other man tackles him to the ground.
He's strong and clearly has training, but Oliver is angry and he's just starting to gain the upper hand when he feels a sharp pain in his arm. He looks down to find the blonde emptying the contents of a syringe into his bloodstream.
"I'm sorry, Oliver," she says. And as his mind grows sluggish, he wonders if she might really be telling the truth. There's too much familiarity in the way she says his name and in the way she runs her hand comfortingly over his head as the world goes dark.
Oliver wakes on the same table as before—except this time he's strapped securely to its surface. It's a good thing too because the more he hears about his alleged life since returning to Starling City, the angrier he becomes. Felicity tells him about Tommy's death and Malcolm Merlyn's corruption of Thea, of losing control of QC and Slade's return. She even tells him some crazy story about Sara surviving to become an assassin. She sounds totally sincere, but he refuses to believe it. As surprisingly detailed as the information this girl and the two other men know about him is, he can't entertain the thought that it's all really true. If he's really been trying to save Starling City for this long and things are still this bad, then what was the point of it all?
Eventually, Felicity makes a hushed, urgent phone call, begging someone to come and see him. He waits, wondering who will walk through the door until Sara finally appears–like something out of the dreams he's had a million times since he last saw her–and Oliver can't deny the truth anymore.
He can barely endure the crushing loss he feels, the loneliness. And then a small hand wraps around his and he looks down to see Felicity gripping it in both of hers, looking at him as if she wants nothing more than to take all that pain away. She looks unsure when she sees him staring and starts to pull away, but he grips her hand tightly in his. He needs to grip onto something good, this friendship built up between them, even if he can't remember it.
Though he comes to wonder if that's all there is between them as time goes on. They're close in a way he doesn't seem to be with anyone else. Like the way she's always touching him. He's not even sure she realizes she's doing it. She'll squeeze his arm as she says goodnight or reach for him when he's injured or even nudge him playfully when she's making a joke. It unnerves him at first, this intimacy, but he starts to crave it—leaning into it instead of flinching away. It's like a simple comfort in the constant confusion his life has become. It's almost as comforting as the way she's constantly saying his name. Never Ollie–the nickname people have always preferred–but Oliver, each syllable rolling off her tongue like it's the most familiar word in the world to her. And he's constantly saying her name too. He doesn't know how it starts, maybe it's in response to her doing it. Whatever the case, he comes to like the sound of it and the way she looks every time he says it.
Memories come back to him in bits and pieces: fighting Slade, what happened between him and Laurel, how much he didn't like Roy dating his sister, even how he met Felicity. But it's still a struggle to run QC or remember he doesn't kill anymore or that he's supposed to trust Diggle and Roy. The only thing that makes it easier is Felicity, guiding him every step of the way and covering for the gaps in his memory. She's tireless in her willingness to help him and he can't understand why.
The two of them are working late at QC one night when he finally decides to get clarification. Oliver is sitting with his shoes up on his desk and Felicity is sitting across from him as they go over information he should already know for a shareholder meeting the next day. Though he's paying as much attention as he should. He's too busy watching her work, enjoying the intense way she stares at her laptop.
"Did you and I ever date?" Oliver asks.
"What?" she asks, looking comically alarmed.
"Did we ever date?" he repeats, sitting up and leaning toward her across the desk. "There's something...different between us. I'm just wondering why that is." Felicity sighs and frowns, sizing him up a moment before answering.
"There was one date," she says softly, eyes darting away.
"Why only one?" he asks, tilting his head.
"Because it was a disaster," she says and he can hear something sad in her voice. "There was an explosion and I got hurt. So you decided that," she pauses and looks back at him, "that being the Arrow meant you would never be safe enough to live a normal life as Oliver Queen. You refused to put me in danger," she finishes and clenches her jaw, giving him a hard look unlike anything he remembers seeing from her before.
"Hmm," he hums in response, sitting back in his chair. That certainly sounds like something he would say. "Makes sense," he adds.
Felicity looks at him a moment longer, as if she wants to say something more, but she turns back to her laptop without another word.
"Did I at least get to kiss you goodnight?" he asks after a moment.
"Oliver!" she exclaims and blushes.
"What?" he asks with a smirk. "I may have forgotten some things, but I still know what kind of guy I am," he jokes. It at least manages to get a sly smile and an admonishing head shake from her.
"No, but we did kiss," she admits and he feels a thrill at the way she says it. "Not during the date though. It was before. We were at the hospital when Lyla went into labor and you just reached out and..." She looks up at him shyly and he can't help but smile a little smugly.
"I wish I remembered it," he says and he really does. She bites her bottom lip to hold back a smile and then pointedly returns her full attention to her computer.
The conversation ends there, but Oliver doesn't stop thinking about it. In fact, Felicity and why he chose to keep away from her before start to take up more and more of his thoughts.
One one hand, she's really not any safer now. She's in danger as long as she works with the Arrow and he knows he'll never convince her to stop doing that. Nothing could make him forget how stubborn she is. He could try to push her away–be cruel, have her fired from QC, never let her into Verdant again–but he's not sure that would work either. She would see right through effort on his part to make her hate him. From what she's told him and the little he remembers, he's never been good at lying to her.
And he wouldn't want to push Felicity away anyway. He may not remember how she became such a big part of his life, but he can see the results. She's too involved in every facet—especially now. She is the only thing he's been sure of since he lost his memory, he can't imagine how he would feel without her.
Which is also why Oliver doesn't try to change their relationship. Felicity may have wanted to date him all those months ago, but her feelings could have changed since then. And his could change again too. He could wake up some morning with all of his memories back and understand why he wanted to keep away from her in the first place, breaking her heart all over again. The thought keeps him awake at night almost as much as his nightmares.
The indecision is maddening and confusing and he wonders if it was this bad before he lost his memory. He gets confirmation that it was even worse when he watches Ray Palmer flirt with her one day and suddenly regains the memory of what it was like when Barry Allen first came to town.
Oliver realizes then that trying to keep away from her is useless. HIs feelings for her are inescapable. He will always arrive back at Felicity no matter how hard he tries.