Which Aria Is It Anyway?
Chapter 6.
The door to her room was opened. It was the first night of her permitted outings, and she had excepted Wren to be the one who'd accompany her as she had grown attached to him, but she was fairly disappointed when she was met by someone who wasn't him.
The guy who'd come to supervise her was a tall man, a broad man, and a scary man. He was like the giant at the top of the beanstalk compared to her. She'd have thought that his white Radley uniform would have softened the first impression she'd gathered from him, but she was frightened by his exterior.
They'd probably sent this particular employee to do exactly that; frighten her. They were letting her out of her room for the very first time since she'd begun her stay there (at least to their knowledge), and they were likely assuming that she was at flight risk, hence the big, scary giant who was there to prevent her from doing so!
It didn't matter if Dr. Sullivan sent a dozen of Radley gorillas to guard her. Her mind was made up so she simply strode past Gorilla Man silently, exiting the room with her head held high as though she was royalty. Gorilla Man trailed behind her, and closed the door to her room before she was escorted to the common area while he held onto arm.
So they really don't want me to flee? She felt that he perhaps was holding a little too strongly onto her arm, but once they reached their destination he released her. She looked down upon her arm as it was throbbing lightly after his touch, and then she glared at him, still not saying a word.
She calmly walked away from Gorilla Man, saving her energy for what was important. She stopped in front of the shelf with board games. Uno wouldn't do tonight. Instead she grabbed a wooden box that contained a mystery game; it could have been chess, and could have been backgammon. The content of the box wasn't significant; she just needed something with some weight.
She sauntered back to Gorilla Man with a slight smile playing on her lips, hoping that he'd assume that she wanted to play the game with him. He seemed to as he returned her smile, but instead of setting the game up on one of the tables, she did something else entirely.
She lifted the wooden box above her head, and before Gorilla Man could register what was happening, she swung it with as much force as she possibly could, hitting him in the back of the head. She had expected that she'd have to hit him multiple times to do any damage, but Gorilla Man surprisingly crumbled head first onto the floor.
She threw the game across the room, and ran out of the common room as fast as her legs could carry her. She wanted to locate the exit quickly so she could find them. She ran through a hallway that she didn't believe she'd been in before, and reached the front desk, or reception if you will. The entrance to Radley was so close, but in her case it was the exit.
She sped up, although she thought she'd been going as fast as she could, but someone grabbed her before she even got past the front desk. The person pulled her closer to them, holding onto her gently, but still firmly. She was forced around to face the person; Wren!
"Aria?" She met his eyes, and her's were so vacant compared to how soulful they usually were, and he instantly knew that this wasn't the real Aria. "Aria, listen to me; snap out of it. I know you can do it." She tried to wriggle out of his grip, and when she was unsuccessful she hissed at him. Literally, like she'd once heard a large tarantula do. "Aria, you are a good person, and you are stronger than A! Please, Aria."
She continued squirming in his arms, but he held tightly onto her, pulling her closer to his body; so close that they were embracing each other, though unwillingly on her account. He was so near that she could feel his heart beating. There was a calm about it, a sense of security, and then she gazed into his eyes. They were warm and caring.
She wanted to be in the moment with him. She wanted to benefit from what she was observing, she wanted to experience it, and to feel it fully. Her eyes flickered, and Wren saw the life return to them, and he smiled with the knowledge that Aria had returned.
In that moment of joy he pressed his lips onto hers, and for a moment she responded, but then she pulled away from him. She met his gaze, her eyes filled with so many questions. She had no recollection of how they had gotten there, and she felt a rush of cold when she realized what that meant; A had been at large again.
The fear that came with that conclusion was too much for her to bear, and she decided to bolt. She wanted to make a run for it so she'd never risk hurting anyone again. Right then she thought that if she ran fast, and didn't look back once, she'd be able to out run A, and leave it all behind. Logically it didn't make sense, but she was just so terrified.
Wren grabbed her again before she got anywhere, holding her still while she fought to get away once more. He took solice in the fact that this time he was dealing with the real Aria. He held onto her until she grew tired of fighting. When she was still, he released her, and she walked into his embrace while she was sobbing.
"What... What's going on?" She whimpered, and her voice was muffled as her face was buried against his chest. "Why does this keep happening to me? I... I wish that I could control it. I wish I could make it never happen again, but I'm not strong enough."
"Of course, you are." Wren assured her while he stroked her hair gently, but she rejected his words by shaking her head softly. "Yes, you are. You snapped out of it just now, and it only took me a few minutes to get the real Aria back. You will only get stronger. I believe in you."
She pulled herself out of his embrace, and folded her arms over her chest. "Well, I don't."
"I will not allow you to begin a row with me for believing in you." He said, keeping his calm. She knew she was being unreasonable, but this whole situation was very frustrating. However, it would be best for her health to follow his example so she exchanged her frown with a smile. "That's my girl. Besides, you may only have attempted to escape this time around."
Aria sighed. It seemed too good to be true, but at the moment there was no evidence suggesting differently. "Maybe you're right." She said, allowing herself to feel a little hope.
"How about we get you back to your room, and have a do over of your first official outing tomorrow night?" Wren suggested, and Aria quickly agreed. Going A really took it out of her. "Good. I promise that from now on I'll do the honours."
He took her hand in his, and led her through the same hallway that A had, unbeknownst to Aria, run through minutes before, and they proceeded into the common area where Aria noticed a rather big man who seemed to have been knocked out, and was slowly coming to himself again.
The man rubbed the back of his neck, and stood up from the floor, looking very disoriented around the room. He spotted Wren and Aria standing in the other side of the room. "What happened?" He asked, unsurprisingly sounding quite confused by the situation.
"Don't worry about it, mate." Wren replied evasively, and quickly dragged Aria out of the room before she got the chance to build up for another panic attack. They reached the door to her room, and he held it open for her, but she hesitated. "What's the matter, Aria?"
"I did that to him." Aria whispered hoarsely, tears forming in her eyes. "I did that to him, and I don't even know who he is. I don't know his name."
Wren sighed, frowning slightly as he prepared himself to calm Aria down when she would surely get worked up again. "He was the nurse escorting you to the common area tonight. His name is Samuel Goodman." He informed, and the tears in Aria's eyes became stronger, and forced their way down her cheeks. "Don't be upset, Aria. Samuel, he's... Well, he's a good man."
"I see what you did there." Aria chuckled softly, but it was a joyless, hollow sort of laughter because she wasn't really amused. "But I hurt an innocent man. Samuel has done nothing to me, and I attacked him."
"Every staff member at Radley know what they've signed up for. They know that their jobs come with risks so you have no reason to feel guilty, especially since you did nothing." He said to comfort her, but she still felt uneasy. "I know your situation is difficult, and you're still very much uncomfortable with it, but it will get easier with time. Just remind yourself that it was the other you who did this."
Easier said than done. "It's a little harder than that, Wren, but I'll try." She smiled sadly to reassure him that her words were true. Perhaps a sorrowful expression of 'joy' wasn't the best way to go, but at the moment it was the best that she could do.
"Good." He placed a soft goodnight kiss on her forehead. "Now go get some sleep. Everything may seem brighter tomorrow."
She stepped into her room, mumbling some goodnight words on her way, but they came out as incoherent gibberish to which Wren merely chuckled. He closed the door once she'd fully gotten into the room, and then he left to take care of his colleague.
Which Aria Is It Anyway?
The teacher had stepped out of the room for a moment, and nearly every student took that opportunity to abandon what they were supposed to to, and instead began goofing off. She'd never really been a part of the crowd so she chose to watch the water boil, taking no notice of her surroundings.
Water was a fickle thing. Stare at it, and it seemed it would never reach the boiling point. Look away for just a second, and it would boil over, almost as if it was eager to finish what it started during the Genesis era. Knowing this, she still kept her gaze, and the tiniest bubbles were brewing underneath surface, indicating that it would only be a matter of minutes.
Laughter, but she paid no attention to her class mates. The bubbles became slightly bigger. She debated with herself when the teacher would re-enter. Probably two minutes after boiling point, she thought to herself. She spent a lot of time by herself, guessing when different circumstances would occur. Albeit nothing world defining, but she still found a solice of sorts in it.
Despite being the girl no one wanted to play with, and despite her lack of human contact, at least of the kind variety, she liked that she knew what type of person people were simply by looking at them. She could calculate their next move, but perhaps that was because she spent so much time on the outside looking in. She was never part of anything.
The only person whose moves she could not anticipate were Alison DiLaurentis'. She simply couldn't relate to that girl's cruelty, and she didn't care for that sort of insight. She'd rather be oblivious. She'd rather be caught off guard than be able to understand the likes of Alison.
Spencer Hastings, the only person in Rosewood who'd ever showed her kindness, had informed her that she was a victim. She'd been told that Alison had elected her to bully, and the other students now saw her as the plague. It was odd because she couldn't remember a time when Alison had singled her out, and launched some sort of attack on her, but somewhere deep inside, although she couldn't pinpoint why, she knew Spencer was right.
If only she could remember a time when Alison had targeted her, and then again not. She'd seen how vicious Alison could be to other people, and she thanked the heavens that she had no recollection of Alison's attempts to bully her.
She had a feeling Spencer knew, along with every single other person at the school, but she chose not to question it. She was blissfully unaware of the things Alison may have done to her, and she chose to keep it that. If she kept her head held high, and pretended like it didn't bother her, Alison would surely lose interest at some point.
It wasn't a difficult task to pull off. How could something faze her that she hadn't even known had been going on? Something that she had no memories off. Maybe Spencer was just paranoid. Maybe Alison was after someone else. Maybe the other students were stupid.
The water reached the boiling point. It looked like the bubbles were doing a happy dance in the liquid. She smiled at the silly thought, giggling slightly as well. Now, what was it that she was supposed to do when the water started boiling?
Before she had the chance to think it over, and remember the next task, someone pulled the pot away from her. She looked up to see who had done it, and the content, the boiling water, was thrown onto her. It happened so fast that she didn't have time to guard herself.
She could feel it burning, and fell off her chair from the shock of the the pain. She cried uncontrollably, every once in a while yelping out in pain. She curled into a fetal position, clutching her stomach even though the pain was nearly unbearable.
Everything went black. She couldn't see a thing, but she heard people laughing. Very loudly. She hadn't the faintest idea how long she'd been there, but someone got angry.
"ENOUGH!" The person shouted. The voice belonged to someone of the female gender. "What the hell is the matter with you people? Do you think that's funny?"
The instegator laughed cruelly. "Yeah."
"You have a horrible sense of humor then." The girl who'd come to her aid said, and she felt someone pulling her up from the floor, gently patting her cheeks to get her back to reality. "Come on, wake up." Her eyes fluttered open, and she was surprised to stand face to face with that Fields chick. "Are you alright?"
"I think so. I don't know." She mumbled, failing to mask her confusion. "I don't... What happened?"
Emily? Wasn't the Fields girl's name Emily? Yeah, it was. Well, Emily smiled sympathetically at her. "You probably got a concussion when you feel. We should get you to the nurse." Emily walked her over to the door with a protective arm around her while sending a disapproving look over her shoulder. "Be ashamed!"
"Why should they be ashamed? What happened?" Aria asked when they'd stepped into the school hallway, and the door to the classroom had closed behind them. "Why does my head hurt? Why is my chest, and my stomach aching? I don't know what happened."
Emily chose the evasive route. Although Aria was physically hurt from the encounter in the classroom, it would only make everything worse if Emily revealed what cruelty had just taken place. "Nevermind those who perform evil."
It made no sense...
She gasped, waking up from yet another one of A's dreams. For once she'd like to just wake up, feeling comfortable and relaxed, doing a nice little stretch before tumbling out of bed. Birds would be chirping, and flying in through the window, and the mice would gather around her as she sang. Well, now her wish was beginning to sound like a scene from Cinderella. A shame life wasn't a fairytale.
"Did you sleep alright?" Someone questioned, and Aria spotted Alison standing by the window in the room. She'd waited for Aria to wake up. Aria merely shrugged as a reply, and Alison knew the answer. She pointed at the window. "They seem to have fixed the window while you were sleeping."
Alison stepped away from the window, and walked over to the bed, and sat down on the edge of it. Aria could see that she was indeed right. The window had been fixed. Any bets on how long it would take A to smash it again?
"You seem upset." Alison acknowledged, and Aria shrugged again. "You don't feel like talking?" Another shrug. "That's right, give me a head start. Confuse the enemy."
Aria cracked a smile. Confuse the enemy was an insight joke she had with her friends. It could be used in any given situation, really. Only they knew when it fit in, and they had never been able to explain it when asked. The only thing outsiders had established was that there was apparently talk of an imaginary enemy.
Alison beamed triumphantly. "Ha! You smiled, and therefore engaged in the conversation. Now you must answer my questions!"
Aria sighed. "I just don't want to sound like a broken record." She spoke softly, and it was barely audible, but Alison heard her.
"I honestly don't mind. The best way to get through something is to talk about it excessively." Alison placed her hand on top of Aria's, giving it reassuring squeeze. "Did something happen yesterday? Samuel Goodman is my nurse, and a substitute showed up instead of him this morning because there had been some sort of incident."
"I don't know what happened, but I think I attacked him somehow." Aria revealed, desperately trying to connect the dots to form some sort of picture of last night in her mind, but once again she couldn't remember what had happened when A took control. "I don't really remember much."
Alison offered her one of those many sympathetic smiles she'd had to endure as of late. "Tell me what you do remember then?"
Aria hesitated before she answered the question, trying to recall her last memory after an A attack was never easy. "I'd been allowed to leave my room, and visit the common area. I was very excited about that. Being cooped up is not my cup of tea. The last thing I remember was being in here, waiting to get out. Then I don't know, and I was suddenly at the front desk with Wren." She paused, contemplating whether or not to tell Alison about the kiss. She opted not to. "I tried to bolt. I just wanted to escape, but he held me back. We agreed that he should bring me back to my room, and when we walked through the common area, I saw a very disoriented Samuel getting to himself again so I put two and two together. I was brought back to my room, and had a minor freakout before we departed."
Alison bit her lower lip as she connected the pieces of information she'd received with her mind. "Okay, and when you say minor freakout is it in the sense that I know the phrase, or does it happen to be the Aria version where it actually turns out to be a major freakout."
"I think I held back." Aria said, but Alison looked skeptical. "No, I did. The biggest freakout of the night was when I returned to Aria, and then tried to bolt."
Another sympathetic smile. "Why did you try to bolt?" Alison questioned, sounding rather concerned.
"I don't know." Aria replied with shrug. "I don't have to explain to you how malicious and cruel A was, and it still terrifies me that I'm that person, and that my weakness allowed her to steal the game from Mona. It's just too much, Ali. I'm always scared, and I keep hurting people. I just... In that moment I just wanted to escape. I thought that if ran, and did it fast enough, I'd be able to leave it behind. If I just kept running I'd leave A here at Radley, and I'd be able to live without any concerns. It's stupid, I know, but I'm constantly afraid."
A silence fell upon them as Alison appeared to be deep in thought. Aria, however, tried to stay out of her head, an act she often failed miserably at. She had to try because her own mind was one of the many things that terrified her. If she entered, it would be wrapped up in thoughts of the many ways she could possibly have attack poor Samuel.
"I think part of the reason you're always scared is because we keep referring to the other Aria as A." Alison broke the silence, and Aria was about to object, and say that was because she was A, but Alison stopped her. "Let me finish. I don't think we should call her A anymore. We should call her something else, like maybe Pumpernickel."
"Pumpernickel?" Aria repeated, looking skeptically at her friend.
Alison nodded enthusiastically, obviously liking the idea. "Think about it; how could you possibly be terrified of someone with the name Pumpernickel."
"Yeah, but I'm still..." Aria began, but Alison immediately interrupted her.
"No, you do not get to finish that sentence!" She said while shaking her head, and using a stern tone of voice. "A is gone. We defeated her when you received help, and started to take your medication. She doesn't exist anymore. There is just Aria, and her other personality that we will now address as Pumpernickel. That's it; no A, just Aria and Pumpernickel. Pumpernickel may do some bad things once in a while, but soon it will just be Aria."
Oddly enough that speech had helped. It made it seem less scary in a way. No more 'the real Aria' and 'A', now it was just Aria and Pumpernickel. It seemed like two different people now, and she couldn't explain how it happened, but she no longer felt as responsible for Pumpernickel's actions. Pumpernickel hurt Samuel, Aria didn't.
"Okay," Aria finally agreed. "We call her Pumpernickel."
Alison did a funny little victory dance. "Great!" She cheered, and then added; "I've always found it kind of stupid to name a bread that, but now we can use it for good and help you."
It was weird. Aria hadn't seen Alison as much of an ally, but now... "You really care what happens to me, don't you?"
"Of course, you're my best friend." Alison smiled sweetly, a thing that Aria had rarely ever experienced. "Plus, I think I might be the most qualified to help you since I know first hand what it means to shed a horrible personality. I just wanna be kind now, and make as many amends as possible." This time Aria reached out, and gave Alison's hand a reassuring squeeze. "I'm not proud of the person I was. I wanna be better now. I guess almost being killed, and then stalked for years, and being physically bullied for a long time really changes a person."
"Well, you're doing great. I really like Alison 2.0." Aria revealed, and then she continued by cracking her first joke in a very long time; "Pumpernickel is not a fan, but what can you do about her?"
Alison giggled softly. "I'm obviously never gonna be everyone's cup of tea. I know a lot of people still hate me, and probably won't give me the benefit of the doubt."
"Screw them." Aria exclaimed fiercely. Besides, they had more pressing things to be concerned about without worrying about the small-minded people in Rosewood. "We're at Radley, and they're out there. So let's not worry about them. Let's just worry about getting better, okay?"
"Sounds like a plan." Alison agreed. She was amazed at how caring Aria was after everything she'd revealed she'd done to her. Alison was lucky to have a friend like her. "Hey, have I ever thanked you for forgiving me?"
"Have I ever thanked you for helping me?" Aria retorted as a way of saying there was no need to thank her. What was forgiveness amongst friends? A given, in her opinion.
Alison responded by wrapping her arms around the smaller girl, hugging her for dear life. Alison didn't believe she'd meant a hug more than she did that one. She was wrong to have ever hurt Aria, and she was glad that she'd chosen to be friends with her, and most importantly she was happy that she had changed so she could keep her friendships.
They pulled apart, and sat in silence for a couple of minutes. Alison eventually broke it by asking; "How long do you think I've been in here?"
"Well, I'm not really an expert at estimating time without some sort of clock present, but I'm gonna guess a while." Aria replied sarcastically, referring to her clockless room.
Alison stuck her tongue out at her cheeky friend. "You know, sarcasm doesn't really suit you."
Aria shrugged, deciding to be serious. "Honestly, I don't know. Why do you need to know how long you've been in here?"
"Because I need to be out of here before the nurses in the common area notice I'm missing, or before Dr. Sullivan decides to pay you a visit." Alison answered, and suddenly seemed nervous. "I should probably go so I won't get caught. I don't want to, though." She added with a sad smile.
Aria nodded her head in agreement. It was best not to be caught because one of the staff's biggest worries were to keep the two of them from interacting, but they obviously felt differently, and therefore broke the rules by meeting in secret.
"Will you be back tomorrow?" Aria asked as she received a goodbye hug from Alison before she left.
Alison smiled. "Of course."
Which Aria Is It Anyway?
Disclaimer; I still haven't purchased the rights to Pretty Little Liars. I'm just not that wealthy.
Dedication; This chapter was dedicated to Pipe It Down Arielle. You might be one of my most perceptive reviewers, and I really like that. You have a lot of thoughts and theories. Sometimes you've been right. I like reading your thoughts on the contents of my chapters. You said you were looking forward to my next chapter... Well, I'm looking forward to your next review. I hope you're satisfied with the chapter that has been dedicated to you.
So this was the end of chapter 6. This is almost like a milestone. I have a very short atttention span, my memory is pretty much short term, and I'm not the best at finishing things. I've had quite a few stories up that I've deleted because I've decided after 3 or 4 chapters that they sucked, and then wanted to do something different. I promise it won't happen with this one. It may be heavy duty to write, but I'm enjoying doing so. So yeah, I'm sticking with it, and therefore I thank you for doing the same. You're are amazing with your reviews, and I hope you continue to support this story.
Also, I know you had to wait a while for this chapter, but I did promise that you didn't have to wait as long as last time, and the delay wasn't as long as the last one so I guess we are making progress. Let's keep doing that. I think I can, I think I can, I think I can – one of my proudest talent is always being able to quote or relate something to Disney because that's just who I am. However, I have new fic coming up titled Shooting Stars, and I might want to finish touches on that before I begin chapter 7, but I still aim to make progress.
Like I said, this chapter was shorter than previous chapters. Still, some things happened. Another A... ahem... Sorry; another Pumpernickel attack occured, and Aria had another interaction with Wren who really seems to care about her. Thanks to those pointing out to me that their ship name could be Waria. Another flashback/Pumpernickel dream took place where Aria got severely burned, and Emily came to the rescue. Thoughts? Also, Alison continues to be nice, even making things easier by giving Aria's other personality an alternative name, but is it all an act? All will be revealed in good time ;).
Lastly, I thank you so much for reading this chapter, and my story in general for that matter. You are awesome. Now comes the traditional begging of the reviews; Please, please, please review. I would appreciate it so, so much. Also, I used to have a turtle named Frog, just thought that would be an interesting fact. But yeah, please review :)
Laters,
AK-tutti :)