Author's Note: For future reference, any time Jane communicates through sign language, it will be underlined. Confessionals will be written in script format, and words between slashes (e.g. /I write this sentence./) indicate an action being performed by that person.

The twenty-two workers stood in the middle of the junkyard, next to the shacks.

"All right, contestants, you should know the drill by now," Chris announced. "Time to form teams! When I call your name, move on over to the left.

"The first worker is... Lorelei!"

The ice queen maneuvered her clunky machine to where Chris designated.

"Howie... and Raphael!"

Raphael covered his face in annoyance, knowing full well that the uberfan would consistently berate him.

"Jane and Foxglove. Don't tell me I never did you guys any favors!"

Foxglove let out a sigh of relief as she accompanied her friend to where the three others stood.

"Louis, get over there!"

The jazzman nodded as he dismantled his saxophone.

"Tom."

"Ha ha, all right!" Tom bellowed as he made his way to his future teammates. "This is gonna be fun, isn't it guys?"

"Never speak to me again," Lorelei grumbled. Tom looked taken aback for about a millisecond before returning to his jovial self.

"Now, don't be like that. It'll be great! All sorts of dangerous adventures await us, and we're gonna make it all the way to the top, together!"

Tom attempted to wrap an arm around Lorelei in a friendly gesture, though it was removed soon afterwards.

"You just touched a machine designated to cryogenically freezing," Lorelei muttered. "I bet you were trying to dismantle it and get me out early. God, you're all the same..."

"Ellen, Sammy, you're up next!" Chris called, thankfully interrupting the situation.

The two girls exchanged small smiles.

"Bastion!"

The jock grumbled as he shuffled to the others.

"And finally... Franky!"

The youngest brother gave a half-fist pump as he jogged to the other workers.

"Hey... what the hell are you trying to pull here?" Ron shouted. "You can't just tear apart a family like that. You got that mute chick with her translator, didn't ya?"

"Watch your mouth, asshole," Foxglove threatened.

"Hey, I think the teams are pretty even this season, if I say so myself," Chris said with a little too much pride. "After all, you're still with one of your brothers, and I even went so far as to make it so that both of the cynics aren't on the same team!"

"I resent that," Zachary and Raphael responded simultaneously.

"But if that's the case, why did you put both people who don't speak on the same group?" Ellen asked.

"Oh, that's because we didn't want both people with sunglasses on the same team."

"Then why not just switch around Arnold and Louis?"

"Because I MAKE GOOD DECISIONS!" the host screamed to the sky. Ellen cowered in fear next to Louis, who raised an eyebrow.

"Anyways..." Chris said, turning to the workers he called out earlier. "You eleven are now officially... the Killer Trash!"

Chef Hatchet half-heartedly tossed a rolled-up sheet of paper to Bastion, who unrolled it to reveal a light-red trash can, its lid slightly lifted to show two devilish eyes.

"That looks... ominous," Sammy commented. "Are you sure we can't have anything that doesn't look like we're a bunch of psychopaths?"

"Nope!" Chris replied cheerfully. "As for the rest of you...

"Topaz, Sheba, Arnold, Lucy, Zachary, Isaac, Largo, Meredith, Angela, Ron, and Reg! You are now... the Screaming Dumpsters!"

Chef tossed another rolled-up sheet, this one displaying a lime-green trash bin with what looks like a squid tentacle popping out of it.

"I see that the creative design budget was simply skyrocketing for this season," Zachary deadpanned. "Are you under contract to not use any other adjectives in fear of showing some originality?"

Chef Hatchet smacked the cynic across the face.

"Thank you, Chef. Now, as you probably guessed, these are where you'll be living. Guys get one house, girls get another, Dumpsters on the first floor, Trash on the second.

"Nearby, you'll also find one of our older Confession Cams, which we'll be using this season as a part of the network's 'go green' project," Chris announced.

Confession Cam

Howie - "Oh, goodnessh. It'sh... it'sh shpectacular! The very shame camera! There'sh where Duncan carved hish firsht shkull, there'sh the scrap from Lindshay's fashion magazine, and... wait for it...

/Howie takes a deep breath./

"Yesh! The shplendid aroma of Owen'sh flatulenche ish shtill here!"

/Howie's eyes grow wide with elation before he collapses from the fumes./

Meredith - "And so it begins. I must say that Chris did do some fairly solid work with arranging the teams. All that matters now is finding the best way to whittle down the workers. This is just a game, and I intend to prove it."

Raphael - "Huh. Guess you can go home again. This feels just like old times.

/Raphael digs through his pockets and pulls out what looks like a stopwatch and a coin. He promptly begins to flip the coin rapidly as he stares at the timepiece./

"Yeah... just like old times..."

"So now that we're settled in, it's challenge time!"

The workers groaned in annoyance.

"We haven't even gotten to unpack yet! Even in arranging a bed, perfection takes time," Bastion complained.

"Shouldn't we at least get something to eat first? I mean, we have a chef here, after all," Sheba said. Chef Hatchet beamed with pride.

"Yeah, give Sammy a break!" Foxglove concurred. Chef Hatchet's face immediately returned to its usual grumpy state.

"Well, tough. Your first challenge begins in two minutes, next to that tall tower over there."

As Chris finished his sentence, he gestured towards an extremely high platform rivaling the mighty Thousand-Foot Cliff, with what looked like a diving board on the top of it.

"Oh, that looks awful," Isaac whimpered.

"Ooh, that looks dangerous," Reg winced.

"Ha ha, that looks awesome!" Tom cheered.

As the workers moved over, several were having smaller discussions of their own.

"What do you think of the place so far, Jane?" Foxglove asked her friend.

"Hard to say. The people seem nice enough, but I think they'll be cutthroat when worst comes to worst," Jane signed.

"I hear that. But we're still playing fair, right?"

"We'd better. I don't want to lose my best friend over a competition."

Foxglove gave a slight chuckle. "Like so many others have?"

"I hear that!" Jane repeated with a smile.

A short distance away, Ellen squinted at the two, taking some notes on a pad of paper.

Confession Cam

Ellen - "Well, surprise of the day; I'm the same Ellen Monroe that's been heralded as the Reality Show Assassin, working for five-thousand per hit from the executives. You'd figure that these others would've heard of me by now! I guess that Howie kid has, but from what I can tell, he's just loopy, and probably thinks I'm some chick he saw at a coffee shop. But hey, if he can help, I might keep him close. It's all part of the job, isn't it?"

"Looks like your sketchwork is far from perfect."

Ellen jumped in fright as Bastion meandered closer to the assassin.

"Well, what are you waiting for? Hand me that sketchpad and let me show you a thing or two about a perfect illustration," the jock demanded.

"Leave me alone, please," Ellen responded, trying her best to remember what after-school specials had taught her about bullies.

"Look, sister, I'm not playing around here. You're hiding something, and I'm not lettin' any pigtailed misfit ruin my perfect game. So give me the damn paper."

Ellen stared at Bastion, then at the paper, then Bastion once more, before immediately tearing the sheet off and stuffing it in her mouth.

"Thew! Now you can't see anythngh!" Ellen spat as she tried to chew her notes.

Bastion cocked an eyebrow. "Clever girl. Don't get too comfy here, though; you mess up again, and I'll be givin' you a perfect elimination."

"I'ld like to see you twy!"

Meanwhile, the Screaming Dumpsters were making significantly less progress to their destination, mainly thanks to Lucy's insistence on being carried there by the other members.

"Move those pathetic legs of yours, you hideous snots!" the dominatrix commanded with another crack of her whip. "I've seen more effort from my past seventeen slaves combined!"

"Did she just say 'slaves'?" Topaz asked Zachary. The two were carrying a large makeshift lift; while they carried the front, Ron and Reg held up the back.

"I don't think you've been given permission to speak, you forlorn sludge!" Lucy shouted. "Another word out of you, and you'll be eating whip for dinner!"

"Hey, it's better than whatever Chef could deal out," Topaz countered before getting a lash to the back.

"I admire your bravery about as much as I admire her word choice; noteworthy, but still pretty damn stupid," Zachary commented with a content smirk.

"Oh, shut it," his partner in carrying muttered. "Was the only reason you decided to do this so you could mock me?"

"I admit, it has its perks," the slumdog said. "But I really did want to help you. After all, you're dealing with a psycho, and at least here I'll be farther away from the Super Mafia Brothers."

"Ron and Reg, you mean?"

"Do I look like I have the time to come up with names for people?"

Topaz shook her head, not in reply but in mild disgust. "At least make yourself useful and see if we've got everybody."

Zachary spun around and did a quick head-count before realization struck.

"Aw, damn it, we've only got ten."

"Who are we missing?" Topaz asked.

"Looks like... that other crazy girl. The one with the parlor tricks."

"Angela?" the tomboy guessed. "What's she doing?"

"If I knew that, we wouldn't be wondering where the hell she was," Zachary whispered to himself. "Look, go get that one kinda crazy kid to help you out."

Topaz rolled her eyes. "Yeah, 'cause that totally narrows things down."

"The mousy one who's been talking to himself ever since we got here," the slumdog spat out, clearly exasperated. "And before you ask, I mean the one that's on our team."

"Isaac..." Topaz mumbled. "Sure, send him up. Just find Angela, all right?"

Zachary gave a grunt before dashing off behind him, tossing a gesture towards Isaac, who was still wringing his hands. The cynic jogged for a few brief moments before finding Angela, who was sitting in a meditative pose.

"Look, Yogi Bare, you know damn well that this is a competition," Zachary near-shouted. "So if you don't want an all-express pass to wherever the hell eliminated contestants go this season, you'd better get your ass up to the rest of us!"

"Who are you talking to?"

Zachary looked around. Though he clearly heard Angela speak, she was no longer in front of him. He turned around to see her underneath Lucy's lift, assisting in supporting the dominatrix.

"Damn it..." Zachary growled before dashing back to his teammates.

By the time Zachary had reached the rest of the Screaming Dumpsters, they had made it to their final destination. The ladder and diving board they knew about, but what caught the attention of the workers was the large wooden tub filled with scrap metal, though a faint glint of shiny new material could be seen when the sunlight hit it in the right angle; considering the fact that this was televised, it did so a lot more than you'd expect.

"Welcome to your first challenge, a little something I like to call the Dumpster Dive," Chris introduced with an evil chuckle. "It's pretty simple, since I know you guys must be tuckered out. Just climb the ladder and dive down into the metal below where you'll have one minute to search for one of twenty-two tokens with my handsome face on it. The team who gets the most tokens wins; if there's a tie, we'll give it to whoever had the most divers instead. Sound good?"

"No. No, it's not. Not a dumpster," Isaac chattered, pointing at the nearby trash. "Not genuine. No logos, no lid. Why would you call it what it's not. Not a dumpster."

Chris frowned. "Sound good to everyone who isn't genuinely insane?"

"What the hell am I supposed to do?" Lorelei asked from within her capsule. "I can barely move in this thing, and now you're expecting me to jump. No wonder you got me for this show; you just wanted another person to tease for the sake of your ratings. You sicken me."

"Hey, now, that's not why we chose you, that's why we chose Howie," Chris explained; the superfan seemed surprisingly unfazed. "And if you're incapable of jumping, that's too bad, but it also means you won't be getting a point for your team. Now then, Dumpsters, since this is your namesake you're diving into, you guys can go first."

"Isn't. Isn't one. Isn't a dumpster," Isaac breathed to himself, restraining himself from grasping onto his head.

"In line, you valueless slag!" Lucy ordered. "Those bitches couldn't jump from a foot-high post, so this shouldn't be a problem at all for you!"

"If that's the case, why don't you do it?" Arnold retorted. "After all, you're so intent on being a leader. Why not set a good example?"

The pyrotechnician was answered with a swift series of lashes from a near-frothing Lucy.

"Never, never talk back to me, you decrepit toad!" Lucy roared. "You are not just a bitch, but a subordinate bitch! You're jumping first as punishment!"

"Sounds good to me. Of course the results might be quite... explosive."

A few of the more pun-weary contestants sighed.

Confession Cam

Sammy - "I still can't believe I'm contractually obligated to turn my passion into a joke. I went on this show to get enough money to start my own restaurant, but at this rate it'll just be a third-rate joint where drunks want me to say a crappy joke. Of course, something tells me that'll happen for whoever wins this show regardless, but that's besides the point. /Sammy chuckles./ See, I can joke; just don't make food the subject, and I'll be fine."

After Arnold ascended the ladder, he once again snapped his fingers. Curiously, the inevitable explosion occurred directly below the tub, leading to the garbage flying into the air. Arnold stuck out his hand to catch the first object to have a glint of gold before descending, token in hand.

"And Arnold gets the first token for the Dumpsters!" Chris announced.

"Whoa, what the hell was that? He didn't even jump!" Bastion countered.

"Hey, he took a drop and he got the token. Give the kid credit for coming up with such a clever loophole," the host said. "Who's jumpin' next?"

"Um... excuse me..."

Chris shifted his gaze; Largo had somehow sneaked away from the rest of the group.

"Is... is anything rusted? I'm... fragile... when it comes to things like these..."

Chris gave a genuine (albeit diabolical) laugh before answering with a flat "yes". Largo's eyebrows skyrocketed as she cowered in fear once again.

"Hey, c'mon. He's just bluffing."

Largo peeked up once again. Sure enough, Franky was standing with a hand extended.

"Chris may be a masochist, but there's no way he'd kill us off. If there's one thing he hates, it's lawsuits," the youngest brother said with a half-chuckle. "So do your team proud and get that token. I know you can do it."

Largo gave the slightest hint of a smile as her face became a bright pink. "Th... thank you..." the wallflower whispered as she returned to where the Dumpsters cheered on a successful dive from Angela, who had acquired a token just as fast as Arnold had.

Confession Cam

Franky - "I'm gonna be honest, having Largo on the other team is kind of a blessing for me. Sure, we spend less time together, but I can still help her out while Ron and Reg think I'm helping them get a victory, since it's my 'duty as the youngest member' or whatever. I guess I can tolerate being treated like that, though. Worth it to see her smile."

Ron - "Franky's still makin' eyes at the quiet broad. I'm tellin' you, she adds up about as well as Reg does, and the poor sap is still convinced that two and two makes five. If she goes, though, Franky'll get his head in the game, and I can't have that when he can still win us challenges. Decisions, decisions..."

Reg - "The boss and Franky are on other teams, and that leaves me kinda stuck. I know the boss cares about the kid, but he'd never say so to anyone's face, and I know Franky kinda likes the boss, 'cause otherwise he wouldn't have agreed to go on the show. Gee, who woulda thought bein' the middle kid would be so hard?"

Now slightly more confident, Largo managed to ignore Lucy's angry cries ("This is treason, you disconsolate bug!") and gave a semi-delicate dive into the trash below. Her search for the token, while funny to the other contestants due to her precise and careful moving of the unwanted items, still proved successful as she claimed her prize within the time limit.

"Thrilling," Zachary grumbled as he stared at the ladder. "How much of this year's budget was spent on this again? Fifty percent?"

"Oh, just jump already," Topaz spat. The cynic rolled his eyes, but proceeded to climb up.

"You seem to be very dominating. Very powerful. Not sure if it's to hide your true feelings or not but it's certainly present."

Topaz turned around. Sure enough, there stood Isaac, wearing a very weak grin.

"Um... thank you, I suppose," the tomboy replied with a large degree of uncertainty.

"Not a complement, just a comment. Large difference, mainly three letters."

Topaz blinked. "Isaac, are you... uh..."

"A what? Your word may only begin with one of twenty-one letters, or twenty if you consider the letter "y" a vowel which it only is in certain situations, so it would be twenty-one. I have a dictionary somewhere. Somewhere nearby," Isaac continued his rambling as he began to search for the aforementioned tome. "Start with 'B', and proceed onwards..."

"Isaac!"

The mousy boy stopped in his tracks.

"Please... you don't have to do that, all right? I just wanted to put it delicately."

"I doubt you would be able to. After showing your preference to control, it would continue. Carry on. Can't be delicate. Delicacy is lady-like. You're not a lady."

One extremely loud slap to the face later, Topaz climbed up the ladder, following Zachary's success of another token.

"Smooth moves, mouse boy," the slumdog deadpanned.

"Not a mouse... not a mouse... not a yard..." Isaac murmured before collapsing face-first into the ground.

"No sleeping on the job, you languid monad! You're diving just like all the other bitches!"

"Lucy, he's collapsed," Sheba said, pacing forward. "Maybe you should just admit that not everybody can dive."

"What are you suggesting, bitch?" Lucy growled as Topaz passed by, token in hand. "Do you not care for what awaits those who don't do their part?"

"Oh no, a whip," Sheba said with heavy sarcasm. "It's not like I've been lashed before in the orphanage."

Lucy responded with a lashing of her own. Much to the dominatrix's surprise, though, Sheba barely flinched.

"Your wristwork is lacking at best," the orphan quipped. "Now if you excuse me, I'm going to be tending to his wounds. And you can count me out of the challenge, by the way; I'm unfit to climb."

With a small wave of her makeshift cane, Sheba limped over to wear the fainted Isaac lay, and produced from her tunic an adhesive bandage and an ice bag.

Confession Cam

Sheba - "If there's one think I've learned from life in the orphanage, it's to always come prepared with some medical supplies. Sure, I nabbed 'em before I got to the competition, but karma dictates that it's all right if it's in case of an emergency. And when your teammate suffers a bitch-slap that painful, I'm pretty sure that's when duty calls."

Ron and Reg took their dives one after the other, and easily succeeded thanks to their smaller sizes.

"Looks like you're the last one," Lucy said as she faced Meredith. "Since I have a bit of respect for you, I'll just let you jump before those other fools go."

"You're kidding, right?" Meredith asked; despite maintaining her stoicism for the most part, she couldn't help but cross her arms. "For a so-called leader, you certainly haven't been doing your fair share. Why can't you jump as well and do your part?"

"Do my part? I've done my part, you doddering tomtit!" Lucy retorted.

"Are these even words anymore?" Arnold asked, though he was ignored.

"I've lead you bitches to victory so far! That alone constitutes a greater deal than the lot of you combined. And with your jump, we'll have eight tokens, which are eight more than they could even dream of collecting. Now unless you want me to whip that look off of that bitch face of yours, you'll get up the goddamn ladder and do your goddamn part!"

Meredith blinked. "Anything else?"

"...No..."

"Very well."

With that, Meredith climbed up the ladder, made a very unenthusiastic jump, and collected her token as Lucy predicted.

"That's eight tokens for the Screaming Dumpsters. Killer Trash, that means there are fourteen tokens left, but you also have the advantage of having some of the excess moved out," Chris announced.

Indeed, the exterior of the tub was now coated in a thin layer of excess garbage from the shockwaves and frantic digging of the eight jumpers. A fly approached the mess before retreating and returning with a microscopic gas mask.

"So, who's going first?" Franky asked.

"DIBS! Ha ha, you snooze, you lose!" Tom bellowed. "Finally, time to see what the acclaimed Chris McLean can really do to a guy!"

With a speed that most everyone thought was impossible for the larger boy, Tom moved up the ladder several rungs at a time.

"Looks like he means business," Jane commented. "Does he have some sort of a death wish?"

"I doubt it," Foxglove answered. "There's a difference between being suicidal and a daredevil, after all. I'm just worried about what he'll lead me into."

Jane politely smiled, being unable to laugh at her friend's joke.

From atop the diving board, Tom's larger weight combined with his newfound acceleration gave a bigger shockwave of garbage from his landing. Among the excess trash was, surprisingly enough, a red rubber ball, which landed with severe force on the ground before bouncing directly into Raphael's face.

Confession Cam

Raphael - /The veteran holds an ice pack to his left eye, his glasses removed./

"Yep. Just like old times, all right."

"Oh my gosh!" Sammy cried, rushing to the nerd's side. "Are you all right?"

"Yeah, don't mind me," Raphael responded. "I guess you could call that karma, in a sense."

"Heh heh... my apologies," Tom said; the daredevil had retrieved his token successfully. "Sometimes I can be a bit much."

"Nah, it's all right, trust me," Raphael said, extending his hand. "Accidents are accidents; I know that as well as anybody else."

Of course, it was during the friendly handshake that Raphael's thick spectacles split cleanly in two, falling off of his face.

"...Well, now I'm angry," Raphael admitted.

"We can't give up now, though!" Ellen spoke up. "Lorelei can't dive in her condition, but we still need eight more tokens to win!"

"Not nechessharily," Howie interrupted. "Remember Chrish'sh rulesh? If we have more diversh, even if we get the shame number of tokensh, victory will shtill be oursh!"

"Yeah, but who's gonna jump next?" Franky asked, before noticing Louis emerging from the tub, token in hand.

"Looks like that answers that question..." Foxglove trailed off.

Confession Cam

Louis - /The jazzman shakes his head in disbelief before playing the first few bars of "The Invisible Man"./

"Mind if I go?" Raphael questioned. "I kinda want to get this out of the way."

"In a hurry to fetch the duct tape?" Bastion mocked.

"Not entirely. I'm mainly doing this because I know Chris will probably want to save me for last to build up drama. The whole 'is he better than he was' schtick, y'know. I figure if I go third, I'll be able to mess with him a bit."

"You do realize that I'm still here, right?" Chris asked, tapping his foot.

"But of course!" Raphael responded. "That's the other reason I'm doing this!"

The host seethed as the veteran climbed up the ladder. Unfortunately, due to his lack of eyesight, he came out tokenless.

"Freaking coattails got caught on the side," he muttered to himself.

"I'll handle this!" Jane signed with a wink before climbing up.

Confession Cam

Foxglove - "Jane and I make a pretty good team, if you ask me. She's got some book smarts, I've got some street smarts. She's sweet as a candy bar, I'm a bit more rough. But more than anything, I admire her for her willingness to do anything. Her muteness isn't a crutch as much as it is an incentive to prove her worth, and that brings about a lot of respect."

Jane - "I'm incredibly lucky to have a friend like Foxglove, and I love her dearly. And while I still want to be friends with her, I want Total Drama to help me connect with other people. That's not to say she's just gonna be my translator or anything, but... well, she's not gonna be around forever. When that time comes, I want to be able to do this on my own, but for now... well, baby steps."

Jane did as she promised, collecting her token with relative ease. Foxglove followed suit, also retrieving her token.

"Finally, my firsht Total Drama challenge ish about to commenche," Howie said, his voice trembling with either fear or excitement. "A thousand-foot dive into a shtack of dishgushting shtuff that fillsh the heart with dread... I can't wait!"

Following in the footsteps of Tom, Howie scampered up to his destination. Unfortunately, his excitement got the better of him as he tripped over the diving board, landing directly on his crotch as he hit the tub.

The inevitable cries of "OOOOH!" did not do much to heal Howie's wounds, and he came out tokenless for it.

"God, you guys are pathetic," Bastion griped. "How do you mess up jumping? Seriously, it's like I'm the only one with any perfection around here."

"Wanna put your money where your mouth is?" Ellen retorted, placing her fists on her hips.

Bastion smirked as he climbed up. Upon reaching the top, the athlete performed a ten-point swan dive into the garbage, followed by an instantaneous token collection.

"And that is how you do it perfectly," Bastion bragged. Ellen rolled her eyes.

Unbeknownst to both of them, however, Meredith had watched over the jump herself.

Confession Cam

Meredith - "Like all reality shows, the only way to win is to either make the strongest people on your side immediately, or eliminate them immediately. Since I can't control when Bastion will be voted off, I must ensure that he is an ally so that I may control the flow of both teams."

"Fine, so you can do a few tricks," Ellen conceded after her jump and token. "It still doesn't mean I like you."

"The feeling's mutual, girly," Bastion smirked. "How's that paper taste, anyways?"

Ellen crossed her fingers that Bastion would be up for assassination sooner than later.

"We missed three tokens so far," Sammy noted. "But if Franky and I can find ours, we'll win the challenge!"

"Don't get too confident," Franky replied. "Who knows how many tokens are left, after all."

Sammy gave a warm smile to the youngest brother. "Well, don't worry about me. If there's one thing every chef knows how to do, it's cleaning up messes!"

With that, the cook ascended the ladder and dived down. A maelstrom of garbage flew up as she searched for the elusive golden coin, which she managed to locate after removing half of the tub's contents.

"Hey, what are you trying to pull?" Ron shouted from the Dumpsters' side. "How the hell can you call that fair play?"

"Well, we did allow Arnold's little fireworks display, after all," Chris retorted. "Every good trick deserves another, though I admit I was more fond of yours; explosions do a lot more for ratings than garbage flying around."

"Good luck, Franky!" Sammy chirped.

"Yeah... yeah, luck," Franky gulped.

Confession Cam

Franky - "Okay, so I don't do heights very well. You try having a power-hungry older brother dangle you from a third story window and not feel the same."

"Remember, Franky, this is all you now," Raphael reminded as he searched for an adhesive for his broken glasses. "If you find the token, we win by a technicality. If not... well, life sucks."

"Your glasses are already broken, though," the youngest brother countered.

"Valid point. Life sucks more than usual, then."

Franky glanced at the diving board once again.

"Just do it, you pansy," Bastion heckled. "If your imperfect brothers can do it, why the hell can't you?"

Franky's expression lit up, and much to his own surprise, he began to climb the ladder.

After reaching the top, Franky looked down, and did a double-take. Closing his eyes, he stooped over, and dropped with all the grace of a football player.

Franky's eyes first glanced at the broken bottle he practically gouged them on, before they were redirected to the timer. Fifteen seconds left.

Fortunately, Sammy's cleanup routine had left the tub more navigatable, even in dire conditions. Twelve seconds.

Tuna can. Newspaper. Briefcase. Eight seconds. Marble. Ice cream cone. Six seconds. Disposable razor. Duck. Four seconds. Holy Grail. Token.

Token?

One second.

"Got it!"

Franky's hands clenched his well-earned prize, but all eyes were on Chris McLean, and his eyes were on the timer.

The seconds lasted for hours, until finally...

"THE KILLER TRASH WIN!"

Shouts of joy echoed through the junkyard as the team celebrated. Jane and Foxglove shared a friendly embrace, Tom and Howie pumped their fists in success, and even Bastion managed to give out a cheer. Only Raphael seemed to avoid the festivities, choosing instead to look at his stopwatch.

"That means Screaming Dumpsters, you'll be facing elimination later tonight. I'll see you then!"

Night fell quickly on the abandoned junkyard, and aside from the moonlight, the only light there was came from a solitary burning barrel in a corner of the worksite. There, on uncomfortable-looking folding chairs, sat the Screaming Dumpsters, though only one was really living up to that name.

"I hope you realize whose fault this is, you palsied greenhorns!" Lucy's voice filled the night air alongside the deafening sounds of a whip cracking repeatedly. "You bitches are all very lucky my license to kill has been revoked, or else this team would be made up of the one person who makes it a team in the first place!"

"Not a team, then. Not a te-" Isaac was interrupted by Reg's hand in front of his mouth, though it was uncertain if it was to maintain his safety or just to shut him up.

Shortly afterwards, Chris walked forward, holding a stack of envelopes.

"The junkyard is home to some of the hardest-working people in the world, and like all hard-working people, your pay does not reflect the effort that you gave," the host began, laughing sinisterly at his own cruel joke. "Each of these envelopes holds a paycheck, good for one Chris Dollar."

"Oh good, legal tender for the funny farm. Guess it'll be useful after the hell you're putting us through," Zachary deadpanned.

"I'll have you know that once Chris Dollars are accepted as legal tender, they will be worth five British pounds, which is a lot more than you'll ever have if you don't zip it!

"Now then, the following workers are safe. Ron, Reg!"

The brothers collected their payments.

"Topaz, Sheba, and Meredith!"

Topaz and Sheba exchanged a high-five; Meredith, predictably, did not.

"Arnold!"

The pyrotechnician collected his envelope, though he accidentally incinerated it with another snap of his fingers.

"Largo!"

Upon hearing her name, Largo cowered in fear. Chris rolled his eyes as he crumpled the envelope into a ball and flung it at her.

"Angel-" Chris did not finish, as the envelope was already in her hands.

"Um... okay, then. Zachary, you're also safe, though I'm not entirely happy about that."

The cynic flipped the host off, but collected his reward nonetheless.

"Now we have Isaac and Lucy left," Chris pointed out. "But let's face it, we all know who it's going to, and for my own safety, I'm not gonna prolong it. Isaac, you're safe, and Lucy, you're out of here!"

A soul-piercing roar interrupted the serene peace and quiet of the Canadian night. On nearby Camp Wawanakwa, a fierce bear reverted to the fetal position, sucking his thumb in fright.

"You're dead, ALL of you are dead, license be damned!" Lucy shrieked as she flailed her whip around. "I was the one leader you had, you vapid little shits! I'll rip your hearts out one by one! Live like a bitch, DIE LIKE A BITCH!"

"Yo, Chef!" the host cried out in fear. Chef Hatchet ran in, wielding a large burlap sack which he threw over the rampaging Lucy. The war veteran tore out a bit of a nearby fence and tied the bag shut before throwing it over his shoulder and placing it on a nearby conveyor belt. The muffled swears and grunts faded as the bag went out of sight.

"That's the Conveyor Belt of Losers," Chris explained. "I was gonna mention it earlier, but I didn't want to deal with Lucy longer than neccessary. And trust me when I say this time, you can't come back. Ever. Or else I would have to deal with a lot of angry parents and angrier lawyers. Thanks for knocking her out so early, workers. Now if you excuse me, I have to change my pants for strictly business reasons."

After the (comparative) calm returned to the junkyard, a majority of the twenty-one workers had gone to sleep after unpacking. Despite the living conditions being as crappy as ever, slumber was easy knowing that Lucy had left.

On the roof of the boy's shack, however, a silouette flipped a coin repeatedly, still gazing at the stopwatch he carried with him.

No one came to speak with him, if only because no one knew he was up there. Soon afterwards, though, the long day had taken its toll, and the lone worker moved to head to bed.

Before descending, the boy whispered a single word that was caught by a passing breeze, a word that meant a lot more to him than the other workers could imagine.

"Ashlynn..."

Who voted for whom?

Zachary - "I vote for Lucy. Sure, everyone here pretty much deserves to go home, but if she's so intent on leading, she'll have to learn the consequences as well.

Arnold - "Who's the crazy girl? Lucy? Yeah, I vote for her. She's more dangerous than I am, and I make stuff blow up."

Largo - "Um... well... I guess I vote for Lucy, but I'm scared that she'll hurt me if I do. Oh, I hope she doesn't see this..."

Ron - "I'm votin' for Lucy. Looks like Franky's given us a little gift, lettin' us get rid of her so quick."

Reg - "I vote what the boss votes!"

Meredith - "Lucy. That much power combined with that much recklessness could ruin my chances at proving my point."

Sheba - "I vote for Lucy, if only because I want to live to see tomorrow."

Topaz - "What are you, nuts? Of course I vote for Lucy! Sure, Zachary's a royal pain in the ass, and Isaac's more than a little weird, but at least neither of them have a freaking whip!"

Angela - "Those who have noticed my lack of a presence are simply lacking in symmetry, which leads to a lack of meditation, which leads to a wasted life. My vote goes to Lucy, for there is no saving one who has thrown away balance."

Isaac - "Pushed in here, said to vote. Voting means elections, elections means whoever gets the most wins. It's a contest. Contests have winners. I'm in a contest. I want to be a winner. I vote for me.

Chris - "We kinda can't show Lucy's vote, since it contains a lot of language that we couldn't show on any television channel. Ever. She didn't even say who she's voting for, just that she's voting for 'the bitch'. We here at Total Drama respect the voters, and will find the person that such a term could most likely refer to so that a fair and honest vote may be had.

"...Oh, who am I kidding? Let's just say she voted for herself. Another vote for Lucy means I can enjoy my luxury home-away-from-home-away-from-home in peace! Screw you, you freak!"

Lucy - Ten votes

Isaac - One vote

Eliminated: Lucy

Author's Note: I thank you for reading.