My only excuse is that I'm ill. Sorry.

Date: 5th February

Character: Bella

Stimulus: Exhaustion

You're so tired. You feel like you've been running forever. You're fighting a losing battle, and you know it. The tear tracks that smother your face are long dry. They make your face feel stiff and sore.

There are no tears left.

It doesn't help to cry. You learnt that a long time ago. It never brings him back. Nothing can do that.

You have to close your eves to keep from seeing the chair in the corner where he used to sit, but every time you close your eyes, he's there. It's a vicious circle. Close your eyes, and he's there. Open them, and he's not.

You just want peace. You want to sleep soundly. You want to dream happily. You want to smile, to laugh. You want to cope.

You can't have any of that.