Pain medication and exhaustion finally took their toll on Jane, and Maura found herself content to stay on her couch with a collection of Dickinson poetry and a critical theory article about post-modern feminist readings of the American poet. She found in her youth that she identified with Emily Dickinson, and though her perspectives and tastes had evolved over the years, she found she still appreciated the reclusive poet's work for what it was. She turned a page, and her focus drifted from nineteenth century verse to the motionless detective asleep in her lap.
The hand not holding her literature was buried in the dense, dark curls of Jane's hair. Aside from the simple happiness she felt at such contact with her beloved best friend, Maura marveled at the texture of the midnight locks between her fingers. She sifted through Jane's hair, thinking. From a distance, Jane's hair looked coarse and unruly - not unlike Maura's first impressions of Jane all those years ago. But to feel it now beneath her hand, Maura reveled in its rich softness. Yes, the natural curls gave it a propensity to tangle, but once the tangles were tamed, they gave way to lengths of silken smoothness.
Just like Jane. If one was brave and determined enough to push past the gruff barriers of Jane's snide remarks and biting sarcasm, there was a gentle, compassionate, and deeply loyal soul to be found underneath. That was quite possibly Maura's favorite aspect of Jane's character. It made her feel privileged to know the person Jane was when her guard was completely down.
Jane let out a tiny sigh - presumably of contentment - but otherwise did not stir or wake.
She's genuinely relaxed, Maura thought, and smiled. Her insides warmed. She softly massaged Jane's scalp and continued to stroke her hair. She realized that if they had stayed like that for the rest of the night, she would have no complaints.
Jane sighed again. Her hand twitched where it rested on Maura's knee.
Maura observed what she could see of Jane's profile. A frown began to brew as dark brows pressed together. Slow even breaths quickened and became erratic. Jaw muscles quivered as she began to clench her teeth. Jane drew her right elbow back slowly, instinctively covering her injured side with her forearm.
Maura slid two fingers to Jane's throat, just below her jaw. She pressed lightly until she felt the pulse. Her eyes narrowed. The pace was steady, but increasing. She was loath, as always, to disturb Jane's rest, but she feared the detective might cause herself more pain if she bore the onslaught of a violent nightmare like those she was prone to.
She moved her hand to the back of Jane's neck first, kneading gently, feeling the tension gathering there. "Jane." Then she slid her palm down between Jane's shoulder blades, rubbing softly.
Jane's whole body jerked and she inhaled sharply. Her eyes snapped open, and she rolled over, looking at Maura.
"Are you okay?" Maura's hand moved, of its own volition, to cover Jane's injured side.
Jane closed her eyes and covered them with her hand. "Sorry. I just remembered I need to call Frost's mom."
Maura tilted her head.
Jane uncovered her eyes and looked at her. "To tell her we caught Ruiz. What time is it?" Her voice was rough with sleep.
Maura checked her phone. "Time for another round of pain medication. You can call her in the morning."
Jane sat up slowly, Maura gripping her arm to support her. "I promised her I'd catch him. That I'd do everything I could."
"And you have."
Jane sat hunched on the edge of the couch cushion. "I just feel like I owe her that phone call." She looked at Maura. "Seriously, what time is it?"
"It's almost nine."
"Mmm...you're probably right. Don't want to bug her this late. " She took Maura's hand and kissed it. "Remind me first thing in the morning?"
"Are you planning on going to work tomorrow?" Maura stood and went to the kitchen to retrieve a pain pill and something for Jane to wash it down with.
Jane smirked. "That's a bit of a loaded question, isn't it? How much trouble would I be in if I said yes?"
"Jane..." She handed Jane a glass of water and the pill.
"Okay, how about this - am I allowed to go to work tomorrow, Doctor Isles?" Jane knocked back the medication with a quick gulp of water.
Maura heaved an exasperated sigh. "I suppose I don't see how I could stop you. Besides, you are an independent adult woman. It isn't within my power to allow you to do anything."
Jane did a little fist pump. "Yes!"
Maura picked up her phone and opened her email app. "It is, however, in Lieutenant Cavanaugh's power to allow you to work...or not, as the case may be." She gave Jane a once-over with her eyes, taking care to linger over the vicinity of her ribcage.
Jane looked at her askance. "I don't like how much satisfaction you're taking in this."
Maura's eyes grew steely. "Jane, you were hit by a car today. And before that you were almost shot. Again." She began searching her contact list as her voice faltered. "What I don't take satisfaction in is the prospect of losing you again. We've only just come to this place of...mutual understanding...I only just got you back!" Maura located the lieutenant in her contacts and began typing.
"Mauraaaaa! Stop! What're you doing?" She made a weak grab for the phone, which the medical examiner easily dodged. "Don't make me stay home. Please. I have to see this through."
Maura's forehead creased in sympathy. But she shook her head.
Jane's expression grew desperate. "Maura. Please. I'm begging you. Let me go in tomorrow. Even...even if it's just desk duty."
She stopped typing and lowered her phone. "Promise me you will not budge from that chair all day."
"Except for lunch and coffee breaks."
Maura rolled her eyes. "I'm not going to make you starve. Now, promise me."
"Cross my heart and-"
"Do not finish that sentence," Maura commanded fiercely. "Of all the ways in which you could phrase a promise, you picked that one?"
"Didn't realize that was such a sensitive subject."
"Jane..." the edge in her voice was telling. Maura was tired, too. Her normal abundance of patience was waning fast.
"Okay...fine. 'I promise.' How's that?" She flopped back against the couch and closed her eyes. Unconsciousness was becoming more appealing by the second.
Maura relaxed. "I will accept that. Was that so hard?"
"Not as hard as it's gonna be to ride a desk and shuffle paper for eight straight hours," Jane muttered darkly.
"Oh Jane, stop with the melodramatics."
She received a petulant glare in reply.
"I'll make you a deal." She stood and held out her hand to Jane. The detective took it and allowed herself to be helped to her feet. "If you're good, and you stay at your desk like I tell you to, after lunch you can come downstairs with me."
"Ooh goody...chillin' with the corpses. Yayyy."
Maura laughed and linked their arms, moving in the direction of the bedroom. "Only if you're good. Nice pun, by the way."
"Thank you for noticing."
Pre-set phone alarms jarred them from sleep at six a.m. the next morning. Jane groaned in aggravation. She swiped blindly at her phone's screen to silence the din her device was making. Finally obtaining the quiet she longed for, she sluggishly rolled over, groaning again with regret as pressure from the mattress send stabbing pain through her fractured ribs.
"Hang on Jane. Try not to move." Maura quickly slid off her side of the bed and hustled out the door.
"No problem," Jane rasped.
Maura returned momentarily with the morning's dose of pain medication, a glass of water, and a banana. She had been gone all of sixty seconds, but to Jane it had felt much longer. Pain - and the subsequent tension throughout her body - had her shaking. She did her best to sit up enough to take a couple of swallows of water.
Jane eyed the fruit while she accepted the meds and water. "You know I can't eat this early in the morning."
Maura nodded, brow deeply furrowed in concern. Her best friend's shallow breathing, and the shudders that wracked her body, did not escape her notice. "Just try for me. Even if you can only eat half, you'll be glad for your lack of gastric discomfort later."
Jane swallowed the medication and took a bite of the banana, willing the tremors to subside. She managed to shakily rotate her body so she was sitting on the edge of the bed.
Maura joined her, sitting down on her uninjured side.
"How did you sleep last night?" Jane asked ruefully.
"I've had better nights," Maura said. She shrugged. "I was just worried about you."
Jane rubbed her shoulder. "Maura, I'm sorry." She pulled her in and kissed the side of her head. "You know I appreciate you, right? Because I do."
Maura nodded, placing her hand on Jane's leg.
Jane turned Maura's chin gently and kissed her. "I love you." She kissed her again, slowly. She felt it of the utmost importance that she conveyed to Maura how much she was loved.
Maura's arm wrapped around her lower back; she clutched a fistful of Jane's t-shirt.
Jane slowed them to a stop as her ribs began to flare up. She cupped Maura's cheek as she pulled away, thumb brushing lightly across her cheek. Maura leaned into her scarred palm.
Their gazes seemed to melt into each other, or so it felt to Jane. She sighed, shaking her head.
"What is it?"
"It's just...it's so surreal." Her voice was soft, warm.
It made Maura's heart flutter. "What?"
"Getting to do this. To wake up next to you, to kiss you just because I can and I want to. When I'd convinced myself for so many years that it was impossible." Another shudder passed through her, and her fractured ribs twinged. She winced.
"Are you sure you want to go in today?" Maura asked, voice grave.
Jane gave a wry smile. "You're gonna give yourself an ulcer if you keep worrying about me like this."
Maura threw up her hands. "Well, I'm sorry but I can't help it, Jane!"
Jane winced again and clutched her side. "These meds better be quick this morning." She met Maura's fretful gaze. She was startled by the heat she saw there. "Frankly, I don't want to go in and do paperwork all day. I'm not looking forward to being confined to a desk."
Maura's expression brightened, no doubt with the hope that desk duty would deter Jane from leaving bed at all.
"But I am looking forward to wrapping this case up. We'll have all the evidence compiled, categorized and catalogued in prep for court. I refuse to let this guy walk on a technicality." She slowly rose from the bed, grabbing her phone off the nightstand. "Korsak, it's me. Can you get me Frost's mom's phone number please?" Maura watched her shuffle to the kitchen. Heard her root around for paper and pen. "Oh...you did? Thanks for doing that, but - well, I thought that was my job. I wanted to...No, it's okay...What's that? She is? Oh...then I guess I'll see her then...yeah...okay...Thanks, bye."
She returned to the bedroom, finding Maura where she'd left her, sitting on the edge of the bed.
"You okay?" Maura had been watching her with such intensity, and now wouldn't meet her eyes. Jane slid her hand delicately through warm blonde hair. Glided her hand down her arm.
Maura looked up at her, hazel eyes full of such melancholy Jane felt her breath catch in her throat. "I was thinking about Frost yesterday. A lot. I'm not sure why." She frowned.
"You miss him." It wasn't a question.
Maura nodded. "I know he was your partner, and I work with all detectives from all units, but he - I just -"
"You don't have to play it down, Maura. Just because he was my partner doesn't mean that you would or should miss him any less than I do. He was your friend just as much as mine. Hell, he was family. To all of us." She gave a sad smile of reassurance.
Maura nodded again. Her chest filled with warmth to see how far Jane had come. "I've accepted that he's gone. But I still miss him when he's not around and he normally would be."
Jane looked down. A lump was forming in her throat. "I think we're going to be feeling that way for a while. Maybe a long time. You lose somebody and you eventually think you're over it, but then something out of nowhere will remind you...and you'll miss them."
"I don't think I'll ever not miss him."
Jane shook her head. "Me neither." She kissed the top of Maura's head. "Nor should we."