A/N - Race to the Edge! Am I right? I was feeling a bit of writer's block yesterday, but RTTE really put me back in the Hiccstrid mood and this entire chapter just came out at once. I was really excited about it. I admit, there is a little more montage happening in this chapter that I would have liked, but there is some necessary montage, because what is happening isn't really that exciting, but totally necessary.

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Chapter 29: Dude!

"American History. It doesn't sound bad," Hiccup shrugged. "But I've said that before."

"Oh, it's just a gen-ed class. It'll be fine. Besides, you'll get to meet all kinds of new people from all over campus," Astrid reassured him for the third time that morning. Absent-mindedly, she straightened a wrinkle on his shirt.

"I know, I'm just nervous." Hiccup took a step back, leaving her hand frozen in mid-air. "I'll be fine tonight."

"That's a good attitude."

"I try." Hiccup shrugged.

The clock on the wall read seven thirty. He had half an hour to get to his first college class. Astrid had managed to work her schedule as to not have classes on Mondays, and she stood by the counter, coffee going cold in her hand, still in her pajamas. She'd slept with her hair in a braid and several hairs had sprung loss during the night.

"What do you want to do for lunch?" Astrid asked, staring down at the cup.

"I don't know," Hiccup answered. "Surprise me."

She nodded, stifling a yawn.

Hiccup readjusted the backpack on his shoulders. It felt…heavy. It felt like high school again, lugging around his too-big pack on his tiny self, earning him the short lived nickname turtle. That tidbit, Astrid would never know. Hiccup had almost forgotten himself, until he strapped the new backpack to his shoulders.

"Are you sure you don't want me to drive you?"

"Yeah," Hiccup nodded. "I think I can handle it."

"Okay." Astrid bit her bottom lip.

"I, uh, better go," Hiccup said, shifting between one foot and the other.

"Right," Astrid nodded. "So I will see you later, then?"

"Yeah, since I kind of have to come back here," Hiccup said with a quick shrug on his shoulders, however the words had left his lips with a tone he hadn't anticipated, and had an undesirable effect. Astrid's sharp blue eyes shot to his face, her lips parted slightly, words frozen on her face, unreadable. Hiccup quickly added, "You know, I live here and all."

"Right, right," Astrid nodded, looking back down at the counter.

Hiccup took his first step around her to the door. Her hand reached out to his arm, gripping his coat sleeve tightly.

"Hiccup," Astrid paused. Her fingers flinched. "Bye. I love you."

Hiccup chocked on the return words. He turned, one hand on the door knob. Her hand fell from his sleeve and hung limply at her side. "I'll see you."

Hiccup closed the apartment door behind him with and a heavy weight lifted from his shoulders. Before he was to the elevator, he heaved a great sigh. He felt for her car keys in his pocket. A light snow had started to fall that morning, but it wasn't sticking. Panic and stress trembled through his veins as he drove through the buzzing college campus, lazily dressed young adults were strung all over it. He parked and started his trek toward the history building.

Inside, it smelled like dust and old books, and it somehow fit. He found his classroom with an ease he didn't expect. The night before he'd had a nightmare that he lost his way and spent the entire day trapped in a never-ending building with upside-down staircases and doors on the floor. Feeling better about it, Hiccup choose a seat toward the back, to the side.

There weren't many people in the room yet, but there was still ten minutes until class started. Hiccup tapped his pencil on his notebook as the room started to fill. He was looking down when the seat beside him was taken, so suddenly that Hiccup jumped and almost dropped his pencil. He grabbed it at the last moment before it tumbled into the floor.

Smooth, Hiccup, real smooth.

"Hey," said the blonde boy who'd sat beside him.

"Hi," Hiccup said cautiously.

The boy wasn't a boy, Hiccup's age at least, with dirty blonde hair in a dozen waist-length dread locks that were flattened out by a old, stained sock hat supporting the St. Louis Blues.

"I don't know you, do you?" he said.

"Uh, no, I don't think so." Hiccup inched back. This boy didn't look unfriendly, quite the opposite, but he seemed…unhinged. Or high, or perhaps both.

"I've been in most parts of this government fortress but I don't remember you," he said with a hand perched on his chin. He looked at Hiccup as if looking through low glasses, scientifically, but in a sudden motion his face completely changed into the friendly boy. He stuck out his hand. "They call me Tuff. It's short for Tuffnut, which is also a nickname."

"Right, Tuff." Hiccup shook his hand. "I'm Hiccup, also a nickname."

"Dude! You have a nickname too?" Tuff said with a hand on either side of his cheek. "What are the chances?"

"Pretty high, actually," Hiccup shrugged.

Tuffnut was thankfully silenced by the entrance of a hurried, middle-aged man with too little hair on his head and a busy mustache.

"Good morning, good morning," the professor said while looking at his unorganized, crumpled notes splattered across the desktop.

X

Astrid stood frozen at the counter. Her hand trembled around the coffee cup. She took a sip. Cold.

"Shit," Astrid spat. She stomped to the microwave and set the cup hard on the glass plate. Hiccup didn't say it back. He didn't say it back.

The microwave beeped and she opened the door hard enough to shake the entire machine. She reached inside, grasped the cup, but the too-hot ceramic seared against her skin and she dropped it with a gasp. The red mug shattered on the floor, brown coffee splattered on the cabinets, the floor, and her legs.

"Shit." Astrid leaned to the sink and ran cold water over her hand.

What a mess. The coffee might stain if she didn't get it up fast. The mug's pieces went into the trash and she mopped twice. She left the mop leaning against the counter and half-collapsed onto the couch, hands on her face.

He hadn't said it back. Why didn't he say it back? She reached for her phone. Heather would know. If not, she would have something to tell her.

U up?

Astrid tapped her toe, waiting. Finally, the screen lit up and dinged.

Yeah, it's early - what's up?

I told Hiccup I loved him last night, but he didn't say it back. He did it again this morning.

You told him you loved him this morning?

Yeah, but he didn't say it back. What does that mean?

Astrid bit her lip.

Maybe he wasn't ready.

But he's said it before. He said it first when we were at his house.

So…he said he loved you, but when you told him you loved him, he said nothing?

Yeah, basically.

? That doesn't make sense. Maybe it's a boy thing.

Maybe.

Did you say something to make him mad?

Her chest shuttered, pushing out a horrible sounding gasp. She grit her teeth and forced the sob back down.

I told him that I was a stripper.

Why? You're not a stripper.

I know. But his father snooped, I guess, and told Hiccup that I was.

But, Astrid, you're NOT A STRIPPER

I know. But stripper sounded a lot better than prostitute.

Astrid, dear, you told him you entertain other men for money. It would make any boyfriend uneasy.

What do I do?

The phone was silent for a while. When the screen did lit up, her heart thumped.

Everyone is different, but give him some time. He's in shock.

Astrid wanted to ask her if Hiccup would leave her because of this, but she wouldn't form the words in her mind, let along on the screen. Her thumb lingered over the keyboard, but she pulled them back.

Astrid, I don't want to tell you I told you so, because there's no easy way to confess to your boyfriend that he's not the only one.

But he is the only one!

To him, no he's not. Boys are possessive. They don't like sharing their girlfriends with other people. What would you do if he told you that he was a male dancer?

At first, the imagine of Hiccup in a low slung fireman's outfit surface, but then the faces of middle-aged women throwing cash followed, and it made a hollow pit in her stomach.

She typed slowly, I wouldn't like it.

Of course you wouldn't.

I'd be upset every time he wasn't home.

Exactly.

Astrid held the phone, waiting for the piece of advice that would string the world back together, like pulling the loose thread on a seam, but the screen remained silent, and in a few moments, went dark. Sighing, Astrid leaned forward to set the phone back on the coffee table. The slick phone hadn't hit the surface before it dinged again. Astrid wrenched it back to her lap with enough force to loose her grip on it, sending it flying into her stomach.

Want to work this weekend?

The text wasn't from Heather. Astrid's heart fell out as she read the sender's name. Alvin. Her thumb hovered over his name, to silence the conversation, to pretend like she hadn't gotten it. A fist ballooned in her stomach.

What should she do? She had car payments to make. She had rent. Car insurance. Gas. Health insurance. She needed a new pair of shoes. Tuition. Books. Student loans. The fist in her stomach moved upward into her throat. She placed a hand over her mouth, sure that she would be sick, but it never came.

She could use the money. But, was it worth it?

Her fingers hesitated over the keyboard. Trembling, she typed. Yes.

OK - C U Saturday. Car will be there at 12.

Her phone slipped from her hands and onto the couch. She clutched her stomach. She ran into the bathroom and collapsed in front of the toilet, prepared for the up-surge, but it never came. She sat back. A cold sweat chilled her skin. She crawled to the shower and started the water. In a daze, she striped and climbed inside. The water steamed, beating down on her face and shoulders.

A sob shook her chest. This was a mistake. She knew it. She knew it. Why was she doing it? The money. Right. Why was it always about the money? Was she crying? In the water it was hard to tell. She scrapped her nails along her scalp. Why couldn't she just have told him the truth?

Because he would've left you, said a angry little voice in her head. He doesn't want to date a stripper, that was obvious. He really wouldn't want to date a whore.

Astrid wiped the tears from her eyes, real or not.

He'll leave you if he finds out.

The sobs shook her viciously.

"I know," Astrid said aloud. "I don't know what to do. I-I…feel something for Hiccup that I've never felt before. I don't want him to leave. I'm…afraid of him leaving, of him not being there. But…I can't tell him…he'd leave."

The voice in her head was quiet for a while.

X

Hiccup's lunch was peaceful, for about a minute and a half, until Tuffnut appeared so suddenly at the small table that Hiccup jumped.

"Hey, dude," Tuff said as she sat down with some odd homemade sandwich in his hand, with what looked like five kinds of cheese. The sauce smelled acidic, but Tuff made no grimace as he took a large bite.

"Hi," Hiccup said.

Tuff ate his sandwich and Hiccup ate his overpriced cafeteria salad. Hiccup was a little glad to have class as his excuse to leave, but when Tuff followed him he felt a small unease in his stomach.

"Uh, what are you doing?" Hiccup asked.

"Uh, I'm going to class."

"Where?"

Tuff pointed ahead, to the same building Hiccup was walking toward.

"What class?" Hiccup asked, knowing the odds were slim that they were going to the same room. There must be at least twenty classroom in the building.

"I've got Mythology," Tuff said. "Bogus, I know, but I've been banned from the ceramic class. Teacher doesn't like me. It's a long story."

"Mythology?" Hiccup asked, a tone higher.

"Yeah, what about you?" Tuff asked.

"Mythology."

"Dude! This is great!"

Hiccup did not feel great as Tuff clapped him on the back. Tuff walked with him to Mythology class. This building smelled different, and somehow the same, less dust, more books, and chalk. He glanced into some of the classrooms. The looked old, several with the green chalkboards instead of the white dry erase boards.

Mythology was on the top floor, the fourth floor, at the middle of the hall. They were the first people in the classroom, but Hiccup had not set his backpack down when someone else came into the room, a girl with short curly brown hair. She smiled shyly and sat in the seat in front of Hiccup.

"Hey," Tuffnut leaned forward in his chair, balancing his desk on the front legs.

The girl looked over her shoulder. "Hi."

"I'm Tuff. It's short for Tuffnut. This is my friend, Hiccup."

Her brown eyes glanced at Hiccup. He gave a short wave. "Hi."

"Hi," she gave a slight nod. "You're name is Hiccup?"

"It's a nickname, just like Tuff." Tuffnut interrupted.

"Yes." Hiccup nodded.

"For…?"

"It's a long story." Hiccup shook his head.

She smiled a little awkwardly. "I'm Cara."

"It's nice to meet you." Tuff leaned dangerously forward. He pointed a thumb toward Hiccup and whispered, "Be careful around this guy. I don't trust him."

Cara glanced back at Hiccup.

"I just met him this morning," Hiccup explained.

"Oh, that's nice. I wish I could make friends that easily." Cara gave a quick shrug of her shoulders.

More and more people dribbled into the class, not near as quickly as the History class. The professor, a short dumpy woman, was standing at the podium, five minutes into class, as students still trickled in.

X

Hiccup's first week was more than a little strange. First, Tuffnut kept reappearing. Hiccup thought he'd lost him on Friday when he used a different door into the cafeteria, going to a different food stop, and sitting at a different table on the far side.

"Hey," Hiccup frozen as someone appeared at the table, but he sighed when he saw that it was Cara, from Mythology.

"Oh, hi, I didn't mean to jump. I'm avoiding Tuffnut."

She gave a small laugh. "Aren't you supposed to be friends?"

"I suppose. I don't really know." Hiccup poked his chicken with a plastic fork.

"Can I sit with you?"

"Sure," Hiccup gestured toward the seat opposite him. The table was small, with only two chairs, but he doubted that Tuff would care about the lack of seating.

"So, what do you think of Mythology?"

"It's okay, I guess. We haven't really done anything."

"I know, I took a class with Johnston last semester. She really likes to talk." Cara sipped her soda. "So what year are you?"

"Oh, I uh, this is my first semester. Ever."

"Transfer?"

"No, this is my first college semester."

"Oh?" Cara raised a brow. "Okay, next question, how old are you?"

Hiccup blinked. "Twenty-two."

"Oh, okay, I thought you looked a little old to be a freshman," Cara said with a relieved smile. "I'm twenty, but I switched my major last semester so I've got another two years to go. Yay me."

"Two's better than four," Hiccup shrugged.

"True," Cara pointed at him with her fork. "So, what's your major?"

"It's, uh, computer engineering."

"Oh, mine's programming right now. It might change again. I don't know." Cara swallowed. "I was an anthropology major, but then I realized that I had almost no career options."

"That's quite a shift."

"I know, but I mean, it's the rest of my life I'm talking about, so what's a couple years versus the next fifty?"

"That is very true." It was quite a refreshing view of things.

The rest of lunch went by without incident, without Tuff, until Hiccup was walking into Mythology class. He appeared suddenly, as if from the trash can in the corner.

"Hey, where were you dude?" Tuff said with dramatic hand-swings.

"Oh you know, here, there, around," Hiccup shrugged. Cara chuckled.

Friday afternoon went by and Hiccup was exhausted. Astrid wasn't home when he collapsed onto the bed. He must have taken a nap, because she appeared in the doorway, arms crossed, her words pushing him out of slumber.

"Rough week?" she asked.

"Oh you know, just a normal, first week of school. Without the being pushed into lockers or having my underwear stolen in the locker room."

"Someone stole your underwear?"

"Yeah, but never my pants. I suspect it was Snotlout. He was never very bright. All he did was carry another's man's underwear with him all day."

Astrid sat down on the edge of the bed. "So…what are you plans for this weekend?"

"I don't know, probably do some homework, sleep, maybe eat something."

"Sounds fun," Astrid said. She shuffled her feet. "I, uh, I'm going to St. Louis this weekend."

Hiccup slowly sat up, maneuvering to see her. She was sitting on the edge, her back to him.

"When do you leave?"

"Tomorrow afternoon," Astrid said quietly. "It's just a Saturday night thing. I'll be back Sunday afternoon."

"Okay." Hiccup bit his lip. "Does that mean that you're working working?"

"…Yeah," Astrid spoke so quietly that Hiccup barely heard her.

Sighing, he scooted toward the edge of the bed and sat beside her. He needed to face this whether he wanted to or not. He really didn't want to.

Astrid was looking down at her hands. She was squeezing them so tightly her fingertips had gone white. Was she nervous? Carefully, Hiccup set his hand over hers.

"Hiccup," Astrid said, her voice strained, raspy.

"Why are you going?"

"Hiccup, I need the money."

"No, you don't, I can ask my dad if-"

"No." Astrid yanked her hand away and stood up. "I'm not taking handouts."

"It won't be a handout,"

"It's charity." Astrid crossed her arms. "I'm not being in someone's debt. I cant take are of myself."

"I didn't say that you couldn't, Astrid," Hiccup said. He could see her fury under her skin, boiling up through the surface. "I just meant, that you didn't have to…do the stuff that you do, if you didn't want to."

Astrid sighed, fury dissipating, the fragments settling into exasperation. She started to pace. "I know. But, you don't understand. I've been in people's debt before and it felt so…trapping, like I could never pay them back. I hate feeling so…dependent. I don't want to rely on other people for my survival. I want to be able to support myself."

"Astrid." Hiccup reached for her, taking her firmly by the arms. "I never said that you couldn't. You can, I know you can. But, what price is that independence?"

Astrid was looking at him, eyes wide, frozen on his face. She opened her mouth, but nothing came out. He let go of her.

"Hiccup," Astrid's jaw trembled. "I don't know what else to do."

He nodded. He didn't know what to tell her. "We'll figure it out. Just, let me help."

"I-I already told Alvin I'd work."

"Okay," Hiccup said. "But, I know it might be a lot to ask, but…I'll just come out and say it. I don't like it. I don't like you…stripping. I know I probably sound possessive, or whatever, but I don't like the idea of other men ogling you, you know?"

Astrid shifted on her feet. "I'm sorry, Hiccup. I am. I've never…had a boyfriend for this long before."

Hiccup felt a lump in his throat. "Because of your job?"

"Not really, but for a lot of things," Astrid shrugged. "Like my nagginess or periodical bitchiness, or my bad cooking, or not answering my phone every god damned time, or having friends, or-"

"Astrid?" Hiccup reached for Astrid. "Just how many boyfriends have you had?"

"I guess, several, but none of them lasted very long. I think my longest run was six months. That one ended in a fiery heap of shit."

Hiccup swallowed and took a step back. This conversation had gone somewhere else entirely. He wasn't even sure what his goal had been in the first place. He shuffled a bit and sat back down on the bed.

"Look, Astrid, I-I think you're great," Hiccup said, fighting that lump in his throat. "I don't think you're any of that stuff you said, but I don't like that you…use your body to make money. It feels…wrong to me."

Astrid crossed her arms.

"I don't like that you do it," Hiccup said. "I want you to stop."

Astrid's face was hard. She bit her lip, and eventually nodded. "Okay."

"Okay you'll stop?"

She was looking at her shoes. "Yeah, I'll stop stripping."

X