A/N: For those who'd like a chapter-by-chapter recap of "Moonlit," there are two on my blog.

Chapters 1-18 stormdragonfly . blogspot . com / 2011 / 05 / I-typed-this-up-for-reader-who . html

Chapters 19-25 stormdragonfly . blogspot . com / 2012 / 04 / so-since-it-will-have-been-long-time_24 . html

Thank you, everyone, for reading! :-)

"I like to think that the moon is there even if I am not looking at it." ~Albert Einstein

~*~ Chapter Twenty-Six ~*~

September 2008

In the last two years Bella's bedroom had seen a few changes. Her dresser no longer rested against the wall to the left of the window, but was now pushed up against the corner on the other side. A tall cherrywood bookcase now took up the space next to the window, the top and bottom shelves neatly held her favorites in alphabetical order by author; the middle shelves were semi-haphazardly adorned with stacks of texts and folders. Above Bella's desk was a large corkboard, pinned with various notes, cheat sheets and visual inspiration. All marks of a young woman deep into academic studies.

Life was good. In fact, it was just about perfect — friends, boyfriend, family, college. Lying on her bed, Bella felt a deep-seated happiness, and it was just blossoming out of her. Perhaps turning 21 made her a little introspective this morning, but why not? Life had come a long way since she'd had to look after her unorganized mother or cook for her father. Instead, she was surrounded by people who would feed her. Ramesh and Matt did communal meals, even if they ordered in. The college always had food, and every now and then the Cullens liked to try to cook for her.

Bella's affection for the Cullens remained strong. She felt more like part of a united family with them than she did with her own parents: Renee and Phil in one corner of the country, Charlie and Sue in another and herself in yet a third. Bella called regularly and tried to see each parent set as often as she could. Even so, she saw the nomadic Rosalie and Edward more frequently than she saw Charlie or Renee.

Bella still occasionally bumped heads with Edward and had a curious at-arms-length connection with Rosalie. Kinship was easier with Alice and Jasper, who in the roles of peers, were somewhat integrated with her friends from the college. Alice enjoyed playing the social college girl. She'd had Anna over for a girls' night more than once. Jasper, Barry and Matt were not welcome. Ramesh, however, was fun-spirited enough to include.

Then there was Carlisle. He and Bella had created a tradition of late night talks when he got in late from work and she was home. Those were Bella's true heart-to-heart nights. Even though she didn't discuss men or sex – well, not really, not gratuitously – with Carlisle, it was her conversations with him that really meant the most to her. With Carlisle she could not only talk about the everyday things, but also her studies, her thoughts, her every feeling. There was never a question she could not posit, a truth she couldn't share. If she argued with Matt, Carlisle would not only give her understanding and support, but also help her to see both sides and Bella would recognize when she'd been unfair.

Bella couldn't quite do the same with others in her life. While constantly protecting the secret nature of the Cullens, she couldn't get to a point of true honesty with any one of her college friends. With the other Cullens, their extra abilities could weigh unsaid in the room. Bella would rather make her decisions without Alice's third eye, Jasper's empathy or Maggie's clarity. And although Bella could talk freely with Esme, it was Carlisle she felt most at ease with. She was her best self with Carlisle and she knew she could always count on him.

Bella tightened her fingers around his. Life was good.

"Nobis cum semel occidit brevis lux, nox est perpetuat un dormienda," Bella recited, lying down on her bed, eyes closed.

Propped up against the headboard beside her, Carlisle's right hand was in her left, and he picked up the next line. "Da mi basia mil, diende centum, dien mille altera, dien secunda centum, diende usque altera mille, diende centum."

"Dien," Bella continued, "cum milia multa fecerimus, conturbabimus illa, ne sciamus, aut ne quis malus inuidere possit, cum tantum sciat esse basorium." Bella sighed happily and opened her eyes. "That one is still my favorite."

"Your accent is excellent. Ready to try something more advanced?"

Bella nodded and closed her eyes again. "Okay, one more."

"De Bello Alexandrino."

Bella scrunched up her face in disappointment, causing Carlisle to laugh, but then she obliged. After reciting the first two stanzas of Caesar's On the Alexandrine War, she tossed her pillow up in the air and cried, "Enough! I'm done."

It was 10 a.m., not quite the usual middle-of-the-night visit this time. At midnight Alice, Jasper, Maggie and Esme had proceeded to get Bella tipsy on red wine. She hadn't made it to bed until 2:30 in the morning, and Carlisle hadn't come home until 6 a.m. Despite being tired, it was still as she'd told Carlisle her freshman year: she'd rather he came to wake her than not see him at all. However, she'd been so drowsy she'd only sipped the glass of water he'd brought before falling asleep again. When she realized she was drifting, Bella had clutched at his arm tiredly and asked him not to go.

Obviously, he had left, but Bella was not complaining. Knowing Bella well enough to understand that a gesture was better received than an actual gift, Carlisle had brought her breakfast in bed — and that was most certainly not an unpleasant thing to wake up to. The tray rested on her desk; the fruit pancakes eaten. God, she loved how fluffy he could make her pancakes. The single lavender aster in its small vase stood erect over the empty dishes.

"I want to say again, Bella, how impressed I am that you chose Latin for your language focus."

Bella grinned at Carlisle, rolling over to prop herself up on her left side. "Why?" she teased.

"'Why?'"

"Why do you feel the need to say it again? Shouldn't your perfect recall satisfy you to my reaction?"

Carlisle reached out and twirled a bit of her hair, joining in on the game. She'd cut it recently so that it fell to just above her shoulders. The reduced weight made the ends curl slightly, and Carlisle was wrapping one around his finger. "Well, I could say it's because your reaction can change, as you are currently proving."

"And what did I say last time?"

"'Thank you, Carlisle,'" Carlisle gave a perfect mimicry of her tone. "'Latin's the root of many languages – not to mention cultures – and I figure if I know Latin then I'm a leg up on the rest of the Romance languages.'"

"I refuse to believe that I talked like that." Bella swung her head to remove her hair from Carlisle's grasp.

"You most certainly did."

"Hmm." Bella made a stern face, but turned and settled against him, her head against his right arm. "You still haven't answered my question."

Carlisle used his free hand to stroke her arm with his knuckles. "I never supposed I would one day find myself on a bed with a co-ed practicing Latin by reciting Catullus."

Bella laughed and shifted into a more comfortable spot against his hard body. "You could, if you went back to school again, instead of forcing just Alice and Jasper to every eight years."

"You underestimate the fulfillment I get out of being a practicing physician, and I do go back to medical school every twenty years or so." Carlisle gave her arm a gentle squeeze. "All the same, you are the only co-ed I'd dream of doing such a thing with. I still have days when I wonder at you."

"Wonder at me?" Bella leaned away to look up at him, giving a confused laugh.

"Yes." Carlisle tilted his head down so his forehead was touching hers. "Marvel at your presence in my life, in my home."

The sincerity —sweet and affectionate— had Bella going still. "Carlisle," Bella whispered, "you're making me blush."

Carlisle shifted away. "I only mean to show you appreciation on your birthday. While you seem to forget you're the only human this family has ever befriended, it does not mean that I do."

Bella sat up as Carlisle moved off of the bed. "You're an elephant: you never forget anything."

Carlisle turned to arch an eyebrow at her. "Is this your newest way of calling me a fossil?"

Bella tossed a pillow at him and got up herself. "Last I knew, elephants were still around. Besides, accept it, old man, you're…"

Bella had been about to tease him about his age, but looking at him standing next to her bed, suddenly she couldn't. Carlisle never looked old, and at that moment neither did he look like a seasoned doctor in his early thirties. His clothes were rumpled and casual, the kind of style many of the Midd students wore. In fact, Bella was quite certain Matt had the same shirt in a slightly darker blue. She suddenly had a ridiculous image in her head of Carlisle walking the campus beside her, a messenger bag across his chest and a bluetooth hooked over his ear. Yet, he could pull it off. Carlisle looked her age.

"Yes?" Carlisle asked when Bella didn't say anything.

"You're not old." Bella rallied, crossing her arms over her chest. "Age is a state of mind, and as long as you don't think you're a fossil, you won't be."

"Very philosophical of you."

"And there comes the condescension. That's what ages you."

"I wasn't being condescending," Carlisle protested, his tone lightening. "I was just teasing you."

"Yes, but teasing me in a patronizing, older-than-thou manner." Bella turned her back on him and started sifting through her dresser drawers, looking for something to change into. She'd been lying on top of her hastily made bed in her pajamas.

Behind her, Carlisle gathered her breakfast tray, transferring the flower onto her desk. "Let's return to being more philosophical then, since you seem to want to discuss our differences. As you are one year older today, soon you'll be closing the physical age gap. The expression, however, is 'young at heart,' and there I'd say we're fairly close to being equal."

Bella laughed, pulling out a shirt, and moving down to her pants drawer. "I could never be your equal, Carlisle."

Carlisle frowned at her bent figure. "Why do you say that?"

Bella stood up again, clothes in hand, and turned to face him. "Why? I'm just me, human Bella. You're unique among your own kind, special, a notch above the rest."

"Bella, I'm not a notch above anyone. I'm just me, and I am far from perfect."

Bella started to laugh again, but stopped when she saw the distress on Carlisle's face. "Oh, I've embarrassed you." She dropped her clothes on the bed and moved around it to place her hand on his forearm. "I'm just returning the appreciation, Carlisle. There truly isn't another such as you."

As Carlisle's hands were still holding the tray, he couldn't return the gesture and touch her back, though his eyes did it for him. "I do not wish for you to think of me as something more than I am."

"You're not giving yourself enough credit. I think of you as you, and who you are is pretty damn special." Bella lifted onto her toes and kissed his cheek. When she settled back onto her heels, she was happy to see Carlisle's face look less strained. "You could come tonight, Carlisle, join us at Two Brothers and leave when it's time to start your shift."

Carlisle smiled. "I wouldn't want to cramp your style. I may look 23, but your friends think I'm 31. Too old to party and definitely an awkward addition."

"I suppose you're right. I didn't really think that one through." Bella looked away, frowning at her lack of reason. Or maybe it was at the disappointment she felt.

"Thank you for wanting me to be there, though. Who's the designated driver?"

"Matt, though we'll be taking my car, in case the five of us decide to go somewhere after the Tavern."

"Just be careful tonight, Bella."

Bella smiled at him. "I will be. Now, much as I love you, I need to get dressed. So out you go."

Carlisle obeyed, but sent a teasing smile at her when he hesitated by the door. "There's no need for you to feel shy. I am a doctor, you know."

Bella laughed. "And I thank you very much for my breakfast in bed, but as I am not in need for any kind of exam, I think I'd prefer you out, Dr. Cullen. Shoo!"

Bella glanced at the door after Carlisle exited, and there was a smile on her face.

(~*~)

Matt answered the door when Bella arrived at the apartment late that afternoon. "Hey," he greeted, kissing her as she stepped in. Bella dropped her purse onto the armchair and saw that he'd been doing some studying. Books were out on the coffee table in front of the couch: Brecht, Artaud. Bella peered into the open textbook when a chapter heading caught her eye.

"'Theatre of Cruelty.' Well, that sounds fun."

"It's about forcing an audience to see a truth they don't want to see, making them be honest with themselves."

"Huh. Sounds like something Maggie would like. Are you using this for your Senior Project proposal?"

"No, it's for Performance Aesthetics, and I am ready to put it away." Matt shut all the books and plopped down onto the couch, pulling Bella into his lap. "Ready to celebrate?"

Bella nuzzled into him, smiling. The plan was to rendezvous with Barry and Anna, hit The Two Brothers Tavern, eat dinner, and then switch to drinking the rest of the night. "Just about. I know tonight's going to be worse than last night. Last night was only red wine."

"Oh?" Matt rubbed her back. "You look fine to me; were you hungover this morning?"

Bella shook her head. "No. I got some water not long after I fell asleep, and breakfast was just great."

"Carlisle?" Matt asked.

"Yes, actually."

"Another 2 a.m. chat?"

"No, I slept in today. Didn't even make it into bed until 2:30." Bella got up off the couch to stretch her back. "Carlisle brought me the water around six, then had the breakfast ready when I woke up."

It suddenly struck Bella how unusual it was to be talking with her boyfriend about another man bringing her breakfast in bed. After all, Matt had no idea that Carlisle was actually the patriarch of a vampire family. To him, Carlisle was a single man living in the same house as his girlfriend. How did she get so lucky that Matt was easygoing about it?

Noticing her looking at him, Matt gave her a slow smile.

"Y'know, I gather most guys might not be so copasetic about my friendship with Carlisle."

"I know what your feelings for Carlisle are."

Bella walked back to her boyfriend and bent down, putting her arms around Matt's neck. "Have I told you recently how much I appreciate how good you are to me?"

Matt's hands came up to touch her. "Maybe not for a couple days."

"You." Bella kissed him between each word. "Are. Wonderful."

"As long as I'm still the one you love most."

"Silly-" Bella began, but lost her breath when Matt pulled her back onto the couch by the hips. His mouth was on hers, and Bella tucked herself closer and responded. Their lips met with perfect suction, and securely held, Bella felt the intensity Matt put into it. Her head spun and after a moment or two she pulled away.

"Um." She licked her swollen upper lip. "I'm going to go get myself something to drink." Matt let her go.

Bella went into the kitchen and fetched a glass from the cupboard, the heavy blue-bottomed one she favored because it felt less frail in her hands. "Matt, you want anything?" she called into the living room.

"All set," he answered. "No, wait, can you grab me the scissors?"

"Sure." Bella finished filling her glass with water and moved to the drawer next to the fridge. "What do you need scissors for?"

If Matt answered, Bella missed it. She was too busy letting out a shriek of surprise at the confetti bomb that came popping out of the drawer at her. Hearing laughter, she saw that Ramesh had been surreptitiously watching her from the doorway of his room. Matt entered from the living room, a grin on his face as well.

"Happy birthday, Bella," Ramesh sang.

"I should have known." Bella rolled her eyes at him. Ramesh loved a good gag, though he would only strike at random, waiting long intervals. The more rare the occurrence, the better the surprise. Bella should have guessed that he'd try something on her birthday and get Matt to go along with it. "I hope that's the last surprise of the night."

Ramesh grinned and made a non-committal noise. Matt put an arm on her back and kissed her head. She rolled her eyes at both of them. Setting her nearly empty glass down, she grabbed a kitchen towel and tossed it into Ramesh's chest. "You can clean up the water that sloshed onto the floor."

"Wait, wait," Ramesh called before she could walk off. "I don't think you finished looking in the drawer."

Bella frowned and stepped back to the counter. Peaking into the open drawer, Bella did notice this time that there was a card with her name on it, scrawled in Ramesh's uneven hand. The card was weighty and Bella hoped it wasn't one of those musical ones. God knew what sort of song Ramesh would pick for her. Yet, when she pulled the card out of the envelope, it was the printed sentiment across the cover that surprised her. Happy Birthday, Sis.

Bella looked up and gave Ramesh a puzzled look before opening the card. Inside the joke was simple and silly. Ramesh had written in: Sometimes we can choose our family. Matt's my brother from another mother and as far as I'm concerned, the past two years have made you my kid sister. The weight inside the card hadn't been mechanical, but was, in fact, a key. Bella picked it up.

"What's this?"

"It's my blessing," Ramesh answered as he stepped forward to give her a kiss on the cheek. "Now, you two kiddos talk. I'll be outside."

Slapping the kitchen towel against Matt's chest, Ramesh departed.

"Matt?" Bella looked at him with raised eyebrows.

"We want you to move in with us."

"Move in?"

"Sure. We've talked about it before."

"In passing, in projected theory."

"Now it's not so projected." Matt reached out and grasped her hand with his, stepping forward to be close to her. "Move in with me. It's the next step, Bella, and it's been too long in coming. I want to keep us moving forward."

"Matt, I don't… I don't know."

"It's not as though you're not here all the time anyway. You should've already had a key. I just am offering to make it official."

"I don't need 'official.' Things are comfortable. I'm—"

"Permanent, then," Matt interjected as Bella continued.

"—happy." Bella blinked at him. "Aren't you happy?"

"Being with you? Absolutely. That's why I want to do this."

Bella didn't know why she wasn't excited about the idea. Hesitation might have made sense, but instead she felt a touch of panic. She'd have to move out of the Cullen house, and stepping away from them felt entirely wrong. When would she get to talk with Carlisle? Esme, Maggie? "I can't just leave the Cullens."

"You're not going to stop being friends with them just because you move out. Whether it's yes—"

"They're more than friends. They're family." Bella talked over him.

"—or no, you don't need…Aren't I more than a friend?" Matt kissed her knuckles. "You don't need to answer tonight. Just think about it and let's go enjoy your birthday, alright?"

Bella took a deep breath and nodded. "Alright."

(~*~)

The laughter was loud, and once again Bella's clumsiness was at the butt of it. Bella ducked her head and took another suck of the straw in her Long Island Iced Tea, her third drink of the night. Barry had bought it for her. Anna had bought the first, a straight shot of vodka — the only thing Anna ever drank. Bella's second drink came from Matt: a strawberry mango margarita.

Bella blinked as she watched the liquid level in her glass go down. Despite the dinner they'd all eaten before getting started, all the different hard liquors were making her feel blurry. At least the iced tea was like a mixture of the other two. What the hell was triple sec anyway?

"Oh, remember when she fell down the hotel stairs in Montreal on Matt's 21st?" Anna interjected.

"Two steps," Bella protested. "Two steps. And it was a hostel, not a hotel. I still say Barry pushed me."

"I did not." Barry was drunkenly noble in his denial. "Why would I do such a thing?" He took another sip of his beer. "You probably felt Ramesh bumping into you."

"Hey! Why are you pointing the finger at me?" Ramesh placed his hand on his heart and widened his eyes.

"Because you," Barry jerked from the waist down, "keep," another jerk, "kicking me!" Bella realized that Barry was returning the favor, and missed with the third kick because he nearly fell off his chair.

"Ow!" Ramesh laughed.

"So," Anna began as Barry righted himself, "did I hear that there's going to be change in living arrangements soon?"

Bella looked at Ramesh, who shrugged sheepishly. "Sorry, it slipped out."

"Nothing's decided yet," Matt answered, and Bella was grateful for his tact. She wondered if part of him knew that she would probably say no. Would say no. Bella began to feel the room pulse around her head a bit. She felt looser, a little bit freer. And with that freedom she now knew that the answer was going to be no. The Cullens were too special to her, and Bella did not want to give up her midnight talks with Carlisle. The idea of doing them by phone had occurred to her, and was immediately rejected.

"Is this Roberta Flack or Lauren Hill?" Bella said aloud, completely non sequitur.

"Was what Robertla Fack or Laurenill?" Barry responded.

Bella gestured to the walls. There were speakers somewhere. "The song!"

Matt was laughing. "Bella, that was three songs ago." Everyone else at the table started laughing, too, as though it was the funniest thing to happen that night.

"Oh." Bella took another sip.

"It's definitely hitting her. Let the wild rumpus start!" Ramesh called out. Barry and Anna cheered.

Matt leaned over and whispered in her ear. "I'm going to go get you something to snack on. Do you want to start on water?"

Bella shrugged. It didn't matter either way. If Matt brought it, it'd be there for her when she wanted it. When Matt stood up, Ramesh got up, too. "My turn to get Bella a drink."

Bella looked down and saw with surprise that her glass was empty.

(~*~)

Bella had planned on switching to only water after Ramesh's Volga Boatman, but ended up doing another shot of vodka less than an hour later. The time had really flown, and Bella was feeling good. They were just exiting the bar, planning on walking back to campus where Matt would retrieve the car. It was great to be out walking so late at night. She was mostly steady on her feet, though it felt as though she could go swimming in the air. What would that be like? To move through the air like a fish?

"Ask a bird," Barry answered.

"Huh?"

"Oh, Bella, you're such a cute drunk." Ramesh gave her butt a quick pinch, his hand gone by the time Bella tried to slap it away.

"I'm not drunk, just tipsy. It's ebbing."

Matt wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "I believe you." He kissed her temple. "Ramesh is clearly more soused than you are."

Laughing, Ramesh sang loudly as he danced into the crosswalk. "And there he was, this young boy, a stranger to my eyes!"

"Ramesh, campus is the other way!" Bella laughed at him.

It happened fast, and Bella saw it all. It wasn't as though time slowed, but more like Bella's mind sped up to see it happen. But what was the difference really? The car struck Ramesh just below the knees, propelling his upper body onto the hood. The legs followed, hitting the windshield. Ramesh's ankles and feet were in the air, above the roof. For one awful instant he was slumped at an awkward angle, his head twisted so that his cheek was against the hood. And he bounced off, landing on the road just a few feet away from the front headlight of the car as it screeched to a stop.

Bella and Matt ran to him as Anna cried out, "What happened? Chyort, what has happened?"

Ramesh didn't move at first. His eyes were open, and he looked at them, dazed.

"Shit! Shit, shit, shit, I didn't see him!" The guy driving the car got out, his girlfriend, too. Bella couldn't tell if they were in shock, drunk, or both. Lil Wayne's rapid gravelly tones boomed from the car.

"What the hell were you doing, driving so fast?" Barry screamed at the kid.

"Is he alright?" The girlfriend started shrieking.

Bella let it all fade into the background. Ramesh's face was bleeding. Had it been a second ago? His leg was twisted underneath his body; he'd landed on it. If he was hurt anywhere else, Bella couldn't tell. His clothes weren't torn, and covered most of his body.

"Ramesh," Matt was saying to him, voice stern and authoritative. "Ramesh, look at me. Can you hear me? Ramesh."

Ramesh's eyes focused on Matt, and he let out a strangled cry. He was in pain.

"I'm dialing 911," Barry announced as he punched the numbers into his cell.

"I already did, asshole!" the girlfriend screamed at him.

"Well, I'm doing it too!" he shouted back at her.

Bella took out her own phone.

"Who are you calling?" Anna asked.

"Better than 911," Bella answered. She spoke quickly into the phone when it was picked up on the other line. "Alice, Carlisle is on duty right now, correct?"

"Yes," Alice answered sadly. "Oh, Bella, I'm so-"

"That's all I needed to know," Bella cut her off and hung up the phone. She didn't want sympathy right now, didn't want to hear anything else Alice might have to say; right now it was time to get Ramesh to the hospital. More blood was becoming visible as it spread into the fabric of his clothes.

"Don't worry, we'll get him to Carlisle. Carlisle will take care of him," Bella said.

(~*~)

It had been hours, and her head was throbbing. Bella had never needed to be in a waiting room under these circumstances. The blue-cushioned chairs grew increasingly uncomfortable. The room seemed to be getting smaller and smaller. The magazines seemed so artificial and offensive. Did people really want to look through TIME or Men's Health while they waited to hear news on a loved one?

Time was relative. Logically, Bella knew that a surgery could take hours. In the OR, the time probably passed quickly as the surgical team invested every second in the examination and repair of the body on the table. Of Ramesh. Yet out here, every minute seemed tripled.

Her hand grew sweaty, slick from the heat of holding Matt's. They sat side by side in silence. No one had anything to say except the occasional comforting word. "Carlisle will take care of him," Bella said, as she had said when they first got there. She never doubted it.

Bella squeezed Matt's hand before letting go and standing up. She needed to stretch her legs, stretch her body. Pointing her arms up to the ceiling, Bella raised onto her toes as she eased the aches throughout the muscles and ligaments of her whole body. Coming back down on her heels, Bella began to pace.

There was no clock in the waiting room. Typical, Bella thought sarcastically, even though she was grateful for the wisdom behind this norm. Seeing Barry look at his watch, Bella walked over to him and gestured with her head that she wanted to see, too. His other arm around Anna's shoulders, Barry lifted his wrist.

Another hour had passed.

Carlisle, Bella thought, please, save him quickly.

She chided herself. Ramesh was badly hurt. If Carlisle needed more time to make sure that Ramesh had the use of all his limbs, and organs that would heal, then he had her blessing to take all the time he needed. Carlisle was taking care of Ramesh. She just had to be patient and wait for the good news. Bella took a deep breath, exhaling through her nose.

Anna abruptly stood up and walked out of the room. Everyone's eyes followed her quick stride and Bella moved to go after her, only to stop at the shake of Anna's head. Instead, Bella returned to her seat beside Matt. Anna was gone only minutes. When she returned her arms were full of junk from the vending machine: pretzels, chips, candy bars, sodas. After dumping all the snacks on the table at the center of the room Anna handed them each a Coke.

The fizz of opened sodas and the crackle of wrappers were the only sounds for the next several minutes. Bella leaned her head on Matt's shoulder, tired despite the fresh intake of caffeine and calories. Matt kissed the top of her head and put an arm around her to stroke her back.

Twenty minutes later, Mr. and Mrs. Rana arrived, anxious and looking rumpled from the long car drive. They'd been in Boston visiting friends, and had not yet flown back to India after returning Ramesh to the college. Matt immediately stood up to great them. "There's no news yet."

"We know," Kapil Rana said. He looked entirely different from the last time Bella had seen him. Tall and robust, his body now drooped as he tiredly scratched at the bald spot on his head.

"Matthew," Priya Rana pulled him into a hug. "Thank you so much for calling us right away." She freed an arm and held it out to Bella. Bella moved forward, and the three of them stood there holding on to each other for several moments.

"Ramesh is going to be fine, Priya," Bella said when she stepped back. "I know the doctor working on him; he's the best there is."

"Meethi, you are very kind." Priya put her hand on Bella's cheek.

More time passed, and Bella had somehow managed to doze off. When she started awake, she cursed herself for being disrespectful to Ramesh's parents. Beside her, Matt rubbed her back. Turning, Bella reached over the metal armrests between them and hugged him tight.

Movement had everyone sitting up and looking. Bella leaped to her feet with a smile and the Ranas rushed over when Carlisle and a nurse appeared down the hall. He wore pale blue scrubs, the surgical mask hanging about his neck. He wasn't smiling; his face was serious. Anxious for news, Bella still hung back among the chairs, Matt's hand on her arm. She watched Carlisle and the nurse talk quietly to Ramesh's parents. It was a new way of seeing Carlisle. Bella had been his ER patient before, but she'd never been the one waiting to hear the good news.

Kapil put an arm around Priya when her hands flew to her face. Bella was sure the relief must be overwhelming for them. But then, Carlisle wasn't smiling. The nurse put a hand on Kapil's shoulder.

Oh no, Ramesh has really been hurt.

Carlisle looked over to Bella, briefly, as if he'd heard her. Priya gestured back with her hand, nodding her head. With another murmur, the Ranas began to follow the nurse while Carlisle made his way over to them. Bella moved to meet him. His expression was… why wasn't he smiling? If Ramesh's recovery weren't 100%, all his friends would be there for him. Bella would, for sure. She braced for the news. "Carlisle?" she managed to get out.

"Bella." From where she'd stopped directly in front of him Carlisle was able to reach out and grasp her hands. She looked up into his steadfast gaze. "I'm sorry. I did everything I could."

Behind Bella Anna let out a wail. A choked coughing noise came from Matt.

"I don't understand." Something cold began to grow inside her.

Carlisle's hands tightened around hers. "I couldn't save Ramesh, Bella. There was too much damage to his body."

"Carlisle, what – what do you mean you couldn't save him?" The last word rose in pitch; Bella was barely aware of it, couldn't control it.

"I tried, Bella. I am sorry. I am so very sorry." There was pain in those inhuman eyes.

Bella looked away. She saw Matt, standing to their right, tears silently trailing down his cheeks. She turned her head even more, looking over her shoulder. Anna was weeping, face pressed into Barry's chest as he rocked her, murmuring and crying tears of his own. Why was everyone crying? It didn't make any sense.

Bella turned back to Carlisle. The unaccountable expression was still there.

"Bella," Matt's voice registered and Bella turned to look at him. He put his hand on her shoulder. "He's saying Ramesh is gone."

It was like a blow to the gut. Bella almost wanted to bend over from the force of it, despite the holds Carlisle had on her hands and Matt on her shoulder. She controlled the pain and looked at Carlisle again, trying to see it in his face. It was there, but she couldn't believe it. Carlisle wouldn't let her friend die. "Is – is it true?"

Carlisle nodded, his gaze locked on Bella. "Ramesh is dead."

The speed with which the numbness in her cracked, turning into grief, anger, and most especially betrayal, took everyone by surprise, including herself. Bella's hands broke free and she launched herself at Carlisle. "Why? What do you mean you couldn't save him?" Her hands slapped, her fists pounded against his chest, and the pain of the contact barely registered as her emotions poured into the attack. "You liked him! He was my friend! Why didn't you save him? Carlisle! Why? How could you?"

Carlisle stood there and took it, let her beat on him while Matt and Barry were trying to pull her off. How dare he just stand there? He'd brought her breakfast in bed that morning, and now... Why wasn't he answering her?

"Bella! Bella!" Matt was calling her name, finally dragging her off of Carlisle.

"Why?" Bella shouted at him one more time before collapsing against her boyfriend, crying into his chest just as Anna had been crying into Barry's. She wasn't even aware of her broken nails and bleeding fingers.

A/N: Acknowledgments: Miaokuancha, for last-minute assistance in French translation and in being a second pair of eyes when I needed one. BookWormBaby2580 and KT8812, for their efforts in finding the right Hindi word. AllTheOtherNamesAreUsed, for being the amazing beta-extraordinaire she is, whether mid-flight or midnight.

"Let the wild rumpus start!" is from Where the Wild Things Are by Maurice Sendak.

I've come across several varying translations of Catullus 5. So here are my personal offerings for you curious folks (not to be taken with academic seriousness, esp. since there's actually only one speaker).

Bella: When the moon comes out, let's have a never-ending night.

Carlisle: Kiss me 100 times… 1000 times… 100 more… 1000 more again… and another 100.

Bella: We're going to kiss so much we'll have to hide the number so no one gets jealous.

Or

Bella: It's nighttime! Let's make this last forever.

Carlisle: Just keep kissing me.

Bella: Count on it.

Next chapter… Oh, the angst! Oh, the grief! Oh, the make up...