Twilight and all characters belong to Stephanie Meyer. and oh my god, 99, reviews, i'm speechless!!!! thanks so much you guys! more gushing afterwards... enjoy!

EPOV

Life's a bitch. I know to other people, this was just a saying, but to me, it described my life perfectly. Because "life's not fair" just didn't seem to cut it.

The plan to talk to Charlie failed miserably. Although he was pissed, he still had the courtesy to knock on the door, well, bang is more like it…

And when I opened the door, Charlie just stared at Bella, pouring all his anger and resentment in that moment on her. And I just couldn't stand to see him do that, I couldn't stand to see Bella's agonized face, so I stepped in between them, crouching a little in a protective stance in front of Bella. And Charlie just shifted his gaze to me and gave ma a cold, hard stare.

If looks could kill, well, enough said. He gave me a look that said "Get the FUCK away from my daughter." And he just grew impossibly more red and infuriated when I turned slightly to wrap my arms around Bella. Because there was no fucking way I was going to let Charlie touch her when he was that upset.

And all Charlie said was, "Bella, get in the car. Now." And Bella obediently picked up her duffel bag, breaking my hold, and walked out to the car, kinda staggering under the weight of her stuff.

"Edward, I have no idea what Bella was doing here or why, but don't you ever come near my daughter ever again. If you so much as lay one hand on her again, I won't hesitate to bring you down to the station on suspicion of possession of a controlled substance."

And I just had a mental dark chuckle because his daughter was the reason why I was going clean and he wanted to take her away from me?

Fuck you.

And all I could was nod my head, because I was speechless, and pray to God Charlie couldn't see the denial in my eyes. Because I was telling him I would leave Bella alone, and that just was never going to happen.

Because, in that fucked up moment, I realized I loved Bella, really loved Bella. And I'd love her forever, for the rest of my fucking existence and then some.

BPOV

After pulling me away from Edward, Charlie didn't say a word.

And it had been a whole week. Not one fucking word. We were both so pissed at each other that we couldn't stand to be in the same room and I cooked his dinner extra early so I wouldn't have to be in the kitchen when he ate it.

And because it was still vacation, and I was silently forbidden from leaving the house, complete love lockdown, I didn't see Edward. At all.

And fuck was it hard. Really hard. The pain that started in the hole in my heart and slowly and agonizingly spread throughout my whole body when I thought of Edward was unbearable. The ache to feel his stone chest, to hear his quiet chuckles, and to see that heart-breaking crooked smile…

It was all just too much. So I spent that last week of vacation just sobbing out the days in my room and tossing and turning night after night of restless sleep. And I tried, really hard, to keep my mind from being totally conscious, keeping it in an everlasting state of numbness which was the only way I could deal with the pain. And Charlie saw it all and didn't seem to care one fucking bit.

But of all the things I was feeling, scared was probably the biggest.

I was scared Edward would relapse. He had been doing fine when I was with him, but we had been no where near done and with a house all to himself, there wasn't much to occupy his time.

And I was scared Charlie would keep Edward away. Yes, I'd see him in school, but that just wouldn't be enough.

Because when you loved someone, the physical pain of separation flooded out everything else. It irrationalized all reasons to live, making my life seem pointless.

And to feel that afterschool, everyday, and extra on weekends, I just wouldn't survive. Suddenly, dying of a broken heart didn't seem so absurd anymore.

And finally, Sunday night came, and I was dying of anticipation for school the next day. I was even in a better mood because I knew I would get to see Edward in twelve hours, I had been counting.

But Charlie just had to ruin that too. Wasn't separating us enough? Ruining my life once enough? Because I had no intention of talking to Charlie ever again, but he just had to call me.

"Bella," he called from the couch, "could you come here please?"

And silently, I granted his request by barely entering through the doorway and stopping a good ten feet away from him. I was still enraged so I didn't want to get too close, just in case I had to channel my anger with physical violence.

"Bella, please sit down," and he patted the space next to him on the couch.

I opted for the recliner and sighed as I sank into the seat. I could tell this wouldn't end well.

"Bella, I know you're angry at me," angry was an understatement. And I made that perfectly clear with my cold glare.

"I did it for your own good." And I just humphed because that was complete bullshit.

"When I was your age, I made a lot of mistakes Bella. I hadn't experienced enough of the world to know what I do today and I thought I knew everything. I was so sure…." And Charlie just shook his head to himself, remembering. And by now, I was a little in shock. Charlie never shared his feelings, what would make him change his mind?

"Bella, I was so sure about Renee. So sure we belonged together, so sure she was my soul mate, that no one could convince me otherwise. We were young, and in love, so we eloped and planned out our whole lives together. Love clouded my judgment, it didn't let me see past the moment to the future or make any rational decisions. Don't get me wrong, I don't regret what happened then, but the pain of the ramifications was just too much to bear. And I can't see you go through that too."

And by now, I was jaw-to-the-floor shocked. Charlie sharing his feelings? About Renee? What was with him? And I started getting worried that Charlie was sick and was suffering from high fever hallucinations.

"Bella, I don't know what's going on between you and Edward, and I don't know how long it's been going on, but it's not safe. Because one day you'll end up where Renee and I did and realize that the path you chose in life wasn't the right way. And the pain that follows right after that epiphany is unbearable. I saw it in his eyes when he came by months ago, Bella, love. It's dangerous and it rules out all reason…"

And I knew what Charlie was saying had a point and was important, but I couldn't keep my thoughts there, in that room, or in Forks.

Because I was flying. Love? Charlie had seen love in Edward's eyes? And all before the party? I didn't know his feelings reciprocated my own and were so deep, let alone that he had fallen before I had…

But why wouldn't he tell me? Was he too afraid? Was he saving it? But it didn't matter. Because I would wait for eternity to hear him say those words.

And Charlie brought me back down, back to Earth, when he said:

"Do you understand now Bella? Why Edward and you can't… be?

And as much as I was mad at Charlie, I hated hurting him with bringing up Renee. But I had to.

"Dad, I understand what you're saying but…" and I decided to get it over with quickly and said:

"Edward and I, we aren't like you and Renee. It's not the same. And I'm notRenee. I know what this is, I know my feelings, and I know this isn't just some little crush. I'm not making the same mistakes, dad."

And Charlie just looked hurt, as if I had slapped him. Because, in a way, I had. I slapped him with Renee and slapped him with ignoring his obvious pleas for me to just drop Edward.

But I couldn't do that.

And I just got up from the recliner, without a word, and silently went up the stairs to get ready for bed. Hopefully Charlie had taken my blunt rejection of his request as a hint that I wasn't going to stop seeing Edward, and that he better get used to it.

Because there was nothing Charlie could do or say to keep me from Edward, my Edward.

EPOV

The last week of vacation was hard.

Okay, it was more than hard, it was hell on Earth. Because I felt the urge to smoke every goddamn day and I had to fucking suppress it. I had to. Bella had gotten me so far and I wouldn't disappoint her like that, by just giving up. I was stronger than that, I was better than that, and this was my one way to prove to myself that I actually deserved a girl like Bella.

And every time I thought of her, her laugh just rang in my head. I think my brain was mocking me and trying purposely to agonize me because every time I heard that laugh, I just fucking stopped whatever I was doing and became completely useless. I would freeze for minutes at a time and just imagine Bella's wide, chocolate eyes staring back at me from behind my closed eyelids. And it was just too fucking much to think of.

My need for a fix was big, but my need for Bella was bigger. And I knew there was no way I could last until Monday morning to see her. No way.

So I got my lazy ass off the couch and got into the car. I didn't really know what I was doing, but I had a vague idea and it was kind of spur of the moment.

Bella couldn't come to me, but no one was preventing me from going to her.

Except Charlie. But he would never know. And I knew, in that moment, that I was officially going insane because it was Sunday night and I would see Bella in less than twenty-four hours anyway, but I just couldn't wait any longer. I needed to feel her in my arms and smell her delicious floral scent. Because what I needed right now was a Bella fix.

BPOV

It was around 10:00 when I was going to call it an early night and go to bed so I could get my beauty sleep to look my best for Edward when I heard a light rapping on my window. And I just thought it was the rain, so I didn't give it much thought, until I heard it again and looked to my window to see a dark form crouched outside.

What the hell?

I was seriously going to freak out if I had some raper/stalker following me. But then again, who would be stupid enough to target the chief's daughter?

So as I approached the window, the person's form became clearer.

And my heart flew. It was Edward. And I just wanted to sing out loud and do a little victory dance in that moment because I was so happy.

So I slowly opened the window, trying to keep it from creaking or squealing too loud, and I just flung my arms around Edward, enveloping him in a hug, because I just couldn't wait for him to be inside my room before I felt him.

Edward chuckled and said:

"Can I come into your room now?"

And I just silently moved out of the way so he could climb in. He seemed pretty badass in that moment and I just smiled at the thought. Edward Cullen sneaking into my room. Which was also the chief's house, so I gave Edward a worried look and said:

"Where did you park your car? If Charlie sees it, he'll kill you…"

"Don't worry Bella, I parked at the end of the street."

And my body finally relaxed. I closed the window, then the door to my room, and went to sit by Edward who was casually lying on my bed.

"Bella, come here, I didn't just walk down a whole block, climb up a tree, and risk my life just to see you."

And I just snuggled into Edward's chest, his open, inviting arms wrapping around me.

As much as I didn't want to ruin this surprise visit, I had to ask.

I lifted my chin so that I was looking up at Edward and said, in a soft voice, almost a whisper,

"Did you… smoke again?"

And I saw the biggest smile break across Edward's face. A proud, triumphant smile.

"Nope."

And I just hugged him tighter as a silent thank you.

"I guess your seducing techniques are working."

Which reminded me what Edward and I had been doing before Jessica's call about the apocalypse. Hmm…. what we had been doing ….

And I just brought my face up to Edward's and crushed my lips to his and began kissing him, pretty fiercely. And once we had the lips down, I began using my tongue because I had to taste him. And once I had the tongue down, I began using my hands, rubbing his chest and feeling his hair, taking fistfuls, willing him to be closer.

And I began slowly forgetting where I was, and vaguely remembering that Charlie was downstairs. Because I was just too preoccupied with Edward's mouth at the moment to care.

And I would have willingly kept going, except that Edward began to pull away as I began slipping my shirt off and put his hands on my wrists, keeping me from removing my blouse.

"Bella, not now. Not Yet."

And I felt a pang of rejection hit me like running into a brick wall. I know Edward was being the responsible one here and was acting impossibly mature and meant it in only the best way, but I couldn't help the irrational pain that flooded through me.

And Edward must have noticed my mood slowly slipping because he cupped my chin and made me look up into his eyes. And I was so embarrassed by the absurd sadness, that I did my best not to comply.

"Refusal skills, remember?"

And I couldn't help but smile. I know he didn't stop because he was practicing my technique, but it made me minutely more happy to know he cared about it.

"But you've been good. You don't need those anymore."

And I knew I was pushing my luck, but what the heck? I tried.

"Bella, I've never felt for other girls what I feel for you. I don't want to… screw up."

More like he didn't want to screw me. But I knew what he meant. I knew he had a long history with other girls, mostly involving sexual relations, and he wanted to save that between us for later. And I know I should have been flattered, but I was angry. So skanky girls could get it but I couldn't?

"Edward, I want to."

"Bella, you don't know what you're saying… It's…"

"Edward, just because I'm a virgin and you're a casanova doesn't mean I don't know what I'm doing."

And I just rolled off of Edward, quite pissed. Didn't think I was capable of sex, huh?

And he tried to turn me to face him, but I just shrugged his arm off.

"Fuck, Bella, I want it to be special."

What were we waiting for? Wasn't that the traditional girl's response anyway?

EPOV

Ugh, Bella was killing me. Arousing the fuck out of me and I had to deny her because, well, I did want it to be special.

And I wanted Bella to know I loved her before we did it.

Because I wanted to love Bella completely, holding nothing back. She deserved the best, and I was determined to give it to her.

And Bella just kept her back to me, still pissed. I couldn't really understand why, I mean, I was the one who wanted to wait because I wanted it to be special. Isn't that what girls dreamed of? Their men wanting to make it special? But girls never made sense. So I just began rubbing Bella's arm, soothingly and slowly, waiting for her hissy fit to pass.

And Bella just had to ask the one question I didn't want to answer.

"How many?" she said quietly, barely a whisper.

And I knew what she was fucking talking about, but I was really hoping otherwise. So I asked her to clarify,

"How many what?"

"How many girls?"

And all Bella did was let out a deep sigh, turned her body, and gave me a deep gaze that went all the way to my fucking soul that I couldn't break from and said:

"How many girls have you been with Edward? Slept with?"

"Bella, I," and fuck, I knew it would hurt her to know the truth, but it would hurt more to lie, so I told her.

"Three."

And Bella just gasped pretty fucking deeply. And I had to clarify shit.

"Bella, I, I wasn't me. I was either drunk or high and they were mistakes. Maybe even the three biggest mistakes of my life… and I can't take them back."

And Bella didn't say anything, she just had a hurt look in her eyes.

BPOV

Three fucking girls. Three girls had rode my man? And I almost scolded myself, with a slap, for thinking so debauched and crude, but I couldn't help it.

I was jealous. And I felt violated, and angry, and frustrated. But Edward had said they were all mistakes, possibly the biggest of his life. Or, he could have just been saying that….

I wasn't sure about anything. Did I really have any right in caring what Edward had done before we met? He hadn't been mine, so didn't he have the right to do what he wanted?

And I just figured, fuck it. Edward was with me now and he wasn't drunk or high. Nothing was clouding his judgment and he had come here on his own free will, and he was here hugging me tightly.

So I returned the hug, just as tightly, to show him I would get past his… friskiness.

And despite how ridiculous the next thought that came into my head was, I just had to ask,

"Edward, will you stay?"

"Like the whole night?"

"Yeah, I mean, Charlie always leaves before me and you can borrow one of his shirts or something…"

And I knew my hopes and dreams were utterly absurd but I really didn't want Edward to leave.

"Okay," and Edward just chucked and said,

"But we have to stop by my house, on the way to school. I'm not going anywhere in the chief's clothes and I have to change, or what would the neighbors think?"

And somehow, I managed to find the strength to hug Edward even tighter to show just how appreciative I was and he started humming. And that was when I fell asleep, in Edward's arms, totally at ease.

And what felt like moments later, the alarm clock was screeching and I flung my arm to smack it but hit something warm and hard instead.

"Oh! Edward, I'm so sorry!"

"What was that for?" he said in a playful tone. So he wasn't upset.

"Well, usually I'm right next to my alarm clock and I kinda missed and I hit you. Sorry."

"It s'kay… you spoke in your sleep last night." And Edward started laughing, hard.

Oh no, I must have said something really embarrassing. And I almost didn't want to know, but I was itching with curiosity so I asked.

"What exactly did I say?"

"Well, you mumbled something like "my Edward" and "… doesn't think I'm ready" and "too sexy." It was all pretty amusing. Just wondering, is it me that you find so sexy?"

And I blushed, I had never told him how he looked in those exact words which implied, I don't know, but I was pretty embarrassed to say the least. So to avoid answering that question, I got up, grabbed a couple clothes from my dresser, and skipped to the bathroom to get ready for school.

And when I got back, Edward surprised me with having fixed the bed.

"Thank you."

"It was the least I could do for your oh-so-flattering compliment." And Edward just chuckled, finding his amazing gorgeousness and its effects on me amusing.

Well I didn't find it funny, so I punched him in the arm, took my book bag, and indignantly stomped down the stairs.

I went to the kitchen, to get some breakfast, slinging my bag to the tile floor. I opened the refrigerator and took out some milk and put it on the counter. As I was intently searching for cereal bowls in one of the cabinets, Edward surprised me again by reaching his own pale arm out of nowhere to grab a bowl from the top shelf. And once he put it down on the counter, I turned to face him with a look that hopefully showed how ticked off I still was.

And Edward brought his face close, almost forehead to forehead, and brushed the hair from my left cheek back behind my ear. Then he brought his lips to my ear and whispered,

"If I could sleep talk, I would probably be saying the same thing. "Bella is unbelievably sexy," especially when she acts all pissed."

And Edward just pushed me further into the counter bringing his lips to mine and began feverently kissing me. And I just reached my hands into his hair, bringing him impossibly closer by making fistfuls, and Edward responded by lifting me off the ground to sitting on the counter top.

And I just spread my legs so he could come closer and wrapped my thighs around him just needing to feel all of him. And both of us were in desperate need of air so Edward, with a deep intake of air, started kissing my throat and sucking my skin and I was pretty much gone. It may have been Monday morning, and we were going to be late for school, but I just couldn't care less.

EPOV

Bella, on the kitchen counter, and there was no fucking way I was going to be able to stop.

And I just mentally slapped the horny teenager in me. What was I doing? After giving the whole spiel about making things special? And it was Monday morning, we had school, and it was Bella. Not some random girl hook-up. This was not how I wanted it to happen. Not how it would happen.

So I slowly tried to pull myself away, but Bella's legs were wrapped around me so tight and she resisted when I tried. She just brought her lips back to mine and drove her tongue down into my throat. Which wasn't helping matters any.

And I barley managed to pull my lips away for a breath and said:

"Not like this."

And Bella knew what I meant. This was not how it was going to be. Because it sure as hell wasn't what Bella deserved, especially for her first time. Which just made me feel bad. I felt like I was damaging something perfect, violating something sacred. And it made me feel like shit.

So thankfully Bella compiled and loosened the grip of her legs around me and disentangled herself. And all she said was,

"Cereal?"

And I just shook my head. I wasn't hungry, and frankly, I was a little disappointed. Fucking amazing kissing and all she could muster up was "cereal?"

Once Bella had washed her bowl, we left the house and walked to my car. We were going to be late for school if I actually stopped by my house so I just shrugged when Bella mentioned it. I would just go to school with the same clothes. No big deal.

Once we got to school, I got out quickly and opened the door for Bella which just made her smile all goofy and we began walking up to the building, my arm wrapped around her waist.

That's when I noticed a red convertible in the middle of the lot. I knew a lot about cars and what everyone drove in town, so I was pretty sure whoever owned the car wasn't from Forks, and I was positive they were loaded because that car cost a fortune.

And that's when I saw the fucking supermodel Barbie get out of her car.

Mwah ha hah ha. Can you guess who it is? Two more characters will be entering the story now. Sorry for whoever didn't really want that but no worries, all focus will still be on Edward and Bella. :) Of course!

Wow, 99, reviews. seriously i am just so happy and speechless and crazy right now. i don't have words to describe how happy i am or how awesome you all are! so let's just take a moment to bask in your awesomeness.....

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Okay, now you can go on with the rest of your lives. Reviews are lovely... and i take back what i said last chapter, definitely not better than Edward shirtless. Better than Charlie shirtless? Definitely. Ew, mental scarring. ha ha.