Disclaimer: I don't Own Spider-Man or Marvel or Capcom

Season 3: Behind the scenes with Deadpool and Rebuke

Well let's get them ready next chapter, Season 3 begins.

"Dude, don't you think you're going a bit far with how many people like Spidey?"

You can't be serious.

"What?"

I thought you knew everything concerning the marvel U

"Wait what are you talking about?"

…Do…do you even realize how many people Spider-Man has dated, kissed, or at least had a solid chance with given the right circumstances in the Marvel U?

"I know the big ones, never really cared that much about whom Spidey banged."

Oh boy, looks like I'm going to have to educate you. Fine I wanted to give the fans a present for staying with me past the 400k mark, how about I give you a list of all the women Spidey has been around?

"You…You have a list?"

Not at all.

"Oh."

But Avenging-X-Bolt on comicvine does. Before I start let me just say I don't take credit for the majority of the following list, I added a few from my own knowledge/research but most of it is thanks to that guy/girl, the main thing I did was put it in this fic since last chapter was lacking on the omakes.

"Do you really need to no way he's had more than seven."

Wanna bet?

"Hell yeah! Loser is the winner's slave for the remainder of your fanfiction career! But these all need to be Canon in the Marvel U and not from your fic!"

Well let's get started.

One, Liz Allan-Pete's first love interest, she loved his intelligence and maturity but because of the high school social ladder the two never went anywhere with it.

"…Shit I forgot about her."

Two, Jessica Jones-Luke Cage's wife, she was completely heads over heels for him in high school but he never noticed.

"Crap you did mention that once didn't you?"

Three, Gwen Stacy- Enough said.

"There we go now we're getting back to the ones I know, I've got this in the bag."

Four, Jean Grey- not love by a long shot but he did make out with her when the X-men saved his live.

"…Oh fuck me…"

Five, Sue Storm- She though he was cute and the two dated once to piss off Johnny and Reed.

"…W-well…hey maybe we can change the deal-"

Six, Skye Pete's girlfriend from the hostess cupcakes comic strip.

"Nope! I'm calling bullshit! That's from a fucking cupcake and while still unsettling it's not really the Marvel U. Nice try douchebag!"

-Rolls eyes- Fine then Six, Marcy Kane- An alien that posed as a grad student whom Peter dated for a bit before she fell in love with Jack of Hearts, he once gave her CPR too if I remember right.

"…Fuck you."

Seven, Black Cat- enough said and look, I got to seven and I still didn't even get to MJ yet.

"… You win…and you're not even going to stop are you? You are going to keep rubbing salt in my wounds."

You know me too well Eight, Debra Whitman- his slightly crazy college Girlfriend who became obsessed with the idea that Peter might have been spider-man causing them to break up. Which in hindsight was a douche move for Peter seeing as she was completely and utterly right.

"Kind of fucked up when you put it that way."

Nine, Marrow- Mutant and former X-Men, she dated Peter when she got brainwashed by SHIELD.

"Oh…I can already see I lost this one badly. You only bet when you know you're going to win."

Ten, Shanna-the protector of the savage lands with her husband Ka-Zar. When Ka-Zar was in the hospital she made out with Peter and they almost became a couple but Peter rejected her when he felt that she still had feelings for Ka-Zar. His exact words were:

"When you're standing here passionately kissing me, how many of us are in the room…huh, Shanna? How many are there? When the answer is just two, then maybe I'll be ready Shanna…and so will you…"

"Rejecting hot jungle women like a boss! I knew there was a reason he was my favorite hero!"

Eleven, Caryn Earle, Pete's hot and flirtatious neighbor, they went on one date before MJ was revealed to be alive.

"Damn…she still single?"

She might be but you're not.

Twelve, Michele Gonzales. Now to be honest this one pisses me off a bit, not her she's cool but Pete pissed me off with this one. She was his former roommate they had a one night stand but it's obvious she wanted more. I don't know maybe it's just me but I liked her attitude.

"She…was hot as HELL!"

Thirteen, Carlie Cooper- Ex-girlfriend and police woman. She broke up with him when she found out he was Spider-Man.

"Now that's one I recognize."

Fourteen, Carol Danvers- What can I say great chemistry, agreed to date him, obviously they were being built up to be a couple but the writers never went with it, but she's a love interest and I will fight you to the death Deadpool to keep her on this list.

"…Chill out bro! I consider her one too…so just put Wiggle's spikey club of death away."

Fifteen, Cissy Ironwood- Prissy college girlfriend.

"Peter's supposed to be a dork right…? At this rate he might just pass Wolvie whose list goes into like...the thirties I think."

Sixteen, Bambi- Former neighbor and single mother-

"MILF!"

*Sigh*…yes Deadpool…any way she flirted with him constantly.

Seventeen, Wasp- Now this one I'm not sure about cause Peter had a crush on her but she was involved with a merc named Paladin at the time.

"…Going by his luck with women if he wanted it enough he probably could have got it so keep it."

Alright Eighteen, Spider-Woman-Jessica Drew! She had a crush on Peter.

"Hell yeah, even I could tell she wanted the Spider-D-"

WADE! Anyway Nineteen, Black Widow- Now this one just creeps me ALL the way the FUCK out. Yeah there's the Nancy Rushman thing, but in an alternate earth they got married…and then she ate him.

"Kinky-"

No I mean she ate him. There was nothing left but his costume and she even picked her teeth with a toothpick.

"…What…the…Fuck Marvel?"

Twenty, Silver Sable- She loves/loved (Cause she might be dead) him in canon. But in an alternate earth when he and Black cat got hitched, Black Cat got killed and she comforted him, eventually they got together.

"And who says you can't go back from black?"

Nice one. Twenty-one *Shudders* Sarah Stacy, daughter of Gwen and Norman once she found out that Pete wasn't her father she got a crush on him and even made out with him.

"Let me get this straight Pete made out with Gwen, her daughter, and the daughter of his most hated enemy? Good go Spidey!"

Twenty two, by the way we passed my amount a long ass time ago, MJ's cousin Kristy Watson who is EXTREMELY attracted to Peter.

"Damn you Spider-Man and your ability to crawl family trees!"

Twenty Three, Shriek-sensing darkness in Peter's heart she tried to seduce and make Peter her mate. She's also Carnage's love interest.

"Well no wonder the psychopath hates him!"

Twenty Four, Jean De-Wolf- She was a member of the NYPD that saw him as a hero. She fell in love with him but due to his relationship with Black Cat she didn't do anything. Her eventual death both devastated him and led to Venom's creation.

"D-Damn, she was awesome.-sniff-"

Twenty five, Red Sonja- possessed MJ and fell in love with him. Lol fun fact in an alternate world Wolverine got with her, Wolvie also got with the bearer of the Witchblade in another universe.

"So Spidey he not only climbs family trees, but comic companies and thousands of years…okay."

Twenty six, Amy Powell- a girlfriend of one of Pete's co-workers that flirted with him to make her boyfriend jealous.

"Hold on, texting Outlaw to stay the hell away from Spider-Man."

Twenty seven, Jill Stacy- Gwen's cousin.

"Hey, hello Spidey?"

["Wade? Why are you calling me-"]

"FUCK YOU! YOU DAMN FAMILY TREE CRAWLER!"

*Click*

Twenty eight, Dorrie Evans, ex-girlfriend of Johnny's who dated Peter to make him jealous.

"NOW, I see why Johnny told Megan so many bad things about the web-head."

Twenty nine, Mattie Franklin, JJ's step daughter that had a crush on Spidey.

"AHAHAHHAHA suck it you Hitler-mustached douche!"

Thirty, Kitty Pryde.

"They only dated in the ultimate-verse!"

True but this is the Marvel U remember? Why did you think I was so confident? I'm just showing off at this point, I won twenty three names ago.

"Damn I hate you."

I bask in your hatred.

Thirty one, Emma Frost-In the Marvel Adventures universe a teenaged Emma has a major crush on Spidey and knows his secret identity.

"So it wasn't weird that I shipped them? Ha! The Ice-Queen and the Jester-wait…oh my God that's perfect! Rebuke write that Fanfic now!"

Hell no you or one of the reviewers do it, I gotta finish this fic first!

Thirty two, Chat- a girl in the marvel Adventures universe that…well just go re-read Emma's

Thirty Three, Rogue- A romance between was hinted at in the X-men forever universe, and she flirted with him in the cartoon.

"Normally I'd say something about the cartoon part but fuck it; the x-forever thing still makes it count."

Thirty four, Mary Jane Watson- enough said, huh I'm just now getting to her?

"Yeah Yeah, just rub it in."

Thirty five, Lady Vermin- A humanoid version of her lusted after him in the Spider-Man unlimited series.

"He's dating pokegirls too!?

She is definitely not a pokegirl, she's an evolved rat that-

"Bla bla bla, can't hear you! Too busy watching Spidey try to catch em' all."

Thirty six, Firestar they shared a romance in the amazing friends cartoon, but she also kissed him when he stood up to bobby for her….which was shown on the news….which meant MJ made him sleep on the couch.

"Ah yes, the couch the replacement bed for men everywhere. The secret is to buy a comfortable ass pull out couch before you get married."

Thirty seven, Tigra- He tried to go out with her once and got rejected.

"Finally! Someone immune to the Spider-Man!"

Thirty eight, Mia Flores- dated him to get close to Harry.

"I have no sympathy for him. Bout time he ran into a gold digger."

Thirty nine, Wow I'm just now getting to her? Betty Brant- Pete's first real girlfriend who dumped him because she thought he would get hurt taking pictures of Spider-Man.

"…Yet she dates Agent Venom. The Fuck?"

Virginia Dare comes in at forty as his love interest in the 1602 reality.

"Ah yes, colonial love and vigilantism."

Forty one, Dazzler he had a major crush on her but he still hasn't gotten a chance to ask her out.

"You know her songs So Many X-Men, So Little Time and Roller Skating in the Deep are my favorite of her songs. Wait a second hold up! I know for a fact that was Ben that had a crush on Dazzler!"

Ah but he was Spider-Man not the scarlet Spider at that time.

"Damn technicalities…."

Forty two, Lois Lane.

…

"…"

…

"…Okay, I'll bite, what the fuck?"

They met in a crossover, he was gonna date her but backed all the way the fuck up when he realized she was engaged to Supes.

"But doesn't he have a chance now? You know with DC's New 52 getting rid of their relationship?"

…

"…"

…

["Deadpool? Quit calling me!"]

"Hey I'm trying to get you laid like a good wingmen. Get your ass back to the DC universe! Lois is single now! Go for it!"

["How the hell do you expect me to get to the DC universe!?"]

"You're the Great Weaver bitch! Now get to it! Quit talking to me and go now!"

["But-"]

"No bitch this isn't MARVEL but, its MARVEL NOW! Now Go! Faster than a speeding bullet before Supes beats you to it again!"

*Click*

Right…well Forty three, Queen- You know evil woman, got screwed over by humanity, and chose Pete as her mate yadda yadda yadda.

"Can't forget dat ass!"

Forty four, She-Hulk- Actually found Spidey sexy, don't even get me started about when he wore his black suit.

"Haha! I wonder who'd be the girl in that relationship? Better clench up Spidey cause Shulkie's gonna smash that ass!"

Like what happened between you and Wanda?

"Now why you gotta go there?"

Coming up in Forty five, Gwen Stacey Miles- a clone of Gwen that was brainwashed into getting close to Peter. She was later assassinated after trying to make a life for herself.

"What is up with Spidey and Stacy's?"

Forty six, Taran- High priestess of the Great Weaver's Temple, she made out with Spider-Man.

"Spidey's got jungle fever~"

Forty seven, Oh…I am going to abuse the HELL out of this one later.

"Now I'm scared…who?"

Hebe- goddess of youth, cup bearer of the gods, daughter of Zeus and Hera and wife of Hercules, made out with her in front of Hercules himself, and he is still alive. His spider-sense tingled with an intensity that was equal to and I quote:

"The sinister six, joined forces with the masters of evil and are chilling with Jonah Jameson."

"OH HELL YES! There we go Spidey! Oh my God this is going to be fucking hilarious when season three comes out!"

Forty Eight, Lily Hollister AKA Menace, made out with her too.

"Man Menace creeped me all the way the fuck out."

Forty Nine, Bounty- A villain that went from killing to smooching him in a single page.

"New record Spidey!"

Fifty, Els Udonta- An alien member of the light brigade that was invited to a party thrown by Johnny when he was rooming with Peter. They partied…hard and she even fell for Peter. When the FF later went back to her planet she recognized Spider-Man even with his costume due to her sense of smell. He tried to deny that he was Peter but she simply brought him in for an embrace and said:

"I'd remember those pouty lips and big round butt in any corner of the universe."

I…laughed…my…ass…off…

"AHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA! The funny part is he calls Adriana big butt, I wonder if that's why she chose him for a mate!?"

Fifty one Dawn Starr, perfect for showing how vague and obscure this list has become. A former student of Peter's at ESU. Kissed him and tried to get close enough to steal the exam answers, only to be stopped by Spider-Man who obviously didn't believe her interest in him.

Fifty two, he also kissed Sharon Ventura, but that was more to break a mind control than anything.

"You know I'm starting to regret I even did this."

Fifty three, Sarah Bailey-Peter's ex-fiancé in the Astonishing Spider-Man/Wolverine series.

"Who the fuck are these mystery bitches!? Where the fuck are they coming from!?"

Fifty four, Alex- the sister of a woman Spider-Man accidently killed. In What if Spider-Man vs. Wolverine instead of taking a plane home like he did in earth-616, he stayed back to protect her in order to make up for all of the deaths that had happened. He was eventually trained by a man named Nebo who trains killers and easily became Nebo's best student, and a cold blooded killer.

"Damn that version of Spidey was so badass!"

I know, anyway he also became romantically involved with Alex. This is one of my favorites because it proves that given the right circumstances, Canon Spider-Man can go from the hero the world needs to the killer it deserves. His Spider-Sense had evolved to the point that he knew who was going to harm him and how they were going to do it far earlier than even they did. He treated Natasha like a child when they fought. He was just a badass and showed just how powerful Peter could become.

Honestly when I first heard of the Superior Spider-Man I was hoping for something like that seeing as it was much more badass than SpOck but oh well, I can dream.

"Any more?"

Nah I think that's it actually. but let's see fifty four divided by seven, 7.714 some more bullshit, in the end I almost won our bet eight times over. Hope you enjoy being my personal minion.

"…Fuck my immortal life. Will…will I at least be able to continue being a badass?"

Of course!

"Well alright then! See you all in season 3!"

Peace!

Read and review

~RebukeX7