Part Two of my fic, with an original bro-moment between Felix and Jake tacked on at the end. (Seriously, I need more moments between those two, and I think one of the guys should have commented on what Felix was willing to do.) If you read, please review (so that I know you're out there, in the wide world of the Inter-webs).
Part Two
They left Felix, just like they had deserted him and Oscar in the forest when Detective Roland had showed up. They were angry and frustrated, and wanted to be as far away from him as possible. After everything that had happened, none of them could believe Felix would just give up. He was Mr. Magic after all. He'd kept his head better than any of them, had stayed up night after night looking for a way to bring Andy home, remained optimistic in the face of their hopelessness. How could he quit?
They needed a new plan. "So we keep going without Felix," Jake huffed. If you're going through hell, keep going, his footie coach always said. Jake had built his life on that motto. They needed to keep going, but now, in their darkest hour, Felix was giving up. Jake detested Felix's weakness.
"How?" Sam fired back. How, indeed. Felix might be the one who always got them into trouble, but he was always the one to get them out of it again. He didn't think they could save Andy without Felix.
Oscar thought the same thing: "We change his mind."
"Felix never changes his mind about anything," Ellen grumbled. "Stubborn and pig-headed." Oh no. "..Stubborn." She caught Oscar's eye.
"He hasn't changed his mind at all, has he?"
"He's going after Andy by himself!"
Alice was already at the altar, thumbing through her Book of Shadows, searching for the right spell to swap Felix for Andy. Andy was a water element, like she was, but the fire element was much different. She needed to tweak the spell she'd given Andy so that it matched Felix.
Phoebe stood behind the dark haired boy, guarding him. There was desperation in her eyes. God, she wished her sister would hurry up. This wasn't the Phoebe Felix had grown fond of and dearly missed. This Phoebe was power hungry, ready and willing to do whatever it took to keep her new abilities. But she couldn't control the powers, balance all the elements at once. The more she panicked, the less control she maintained; the less she could control herself, the more distressed she became. The ground was already starting to tremble violently. This wouldn't work if Phoebe caused the building to collapse and killed them all.
"Felix!" Ellen screamed, when she saw him.
"We have to get out of here!" Jake added.
"Wait," Felix pleaded, "you don't understand!"
"No," Ellen replied. "We completely understand."
You're wrong. You could never understand. Did they know the pain he felt having caused the accident that paralyzed his younger brother? Did they know what it was like to carry that kind of guilt? To know what every time his parents looked at him, they remembered what had happened, until they chose not to look at all, until he was practically invisible? To look at the brother he loved more than anyone else on the planet and know he were responsible for his pain?
Did they know what it was like to be the loner and the freak? For his only friend since childhood to be the girl he has been secretly in love with for years, and watch her fall for someone else in another universe, and wonder if that could happen in this reality too?
Did they know what it was like to spend months tirelessly planning and implementing a spell to help Oscar walk again, for it to blow up in his face? To have finally started making friends, and beginning to feel he belonged somewhere, and have those friends discover he had betrayed them? For them to be so angry they desired to see him punished, when he only ever had good intentions?
Did they know how it felt to have everyone blame him for Andy's disappearance, have them suspect him of foul play, when he would never hurt Andy? To have people accuse him, even though he knew Andy had done this to himself in his selfishness and his desire to attract Felix's girlfriend, even when Andy knew how he felt about her?
Did they know the fear and horror he felt, when his teacher and younger brother kidnapped him when they were possessed by a demon? To be more terrified than he had ever been in his life, screaming for help until his throat burned, knowing no one was coming to rescue him, no one cared what happened to him?
Did they know what it was like to wish the Restoring Demon had just killed him in the forest, when he had begged it to take him and spare his friends?
Did they know how it felt to be passionately willing to sacrifice himself for a friend who loved to hate him, knowing that he probably would not do the same for him? That none of them would?
How could she say that they understood?
"Come on, Felix! Please!" Oscar cried.
Felix looked at him, saw the despair in his brother's wide eyes, and hesitated. Oscar was the only thing holding him back. He didn't want Oscar to suffer the way Viv Lau was, wondering – hoping against hope – if her brother was ever coming home. But Felix had to get Andy back to his family, and this was the only way to do it.
Felix turned back towards the altar. It was now or never. As he was about to step towards the portal, a strong hand grabbed him from behind and half-led, half-dragged him away. Keeping his hand on Felix's back, Jake steered him along as the gang fled the warehouse, making sure Felix didn't attempt to run back towards the portal.
"When will you get it, Felix?" Ellen shouted, when they had made it out of the trembling building. "Swapping yourself for Andy isn't the answer."
"Then what is?" Felix yelled back in exasperation. He had tried looking for a solution, and this is the only one he could find.
However, as it turned out, their problem was resolved through Phoebe and Alice. Because her powers were stolen, Phoebe was responsible for restoring balance to the universe. She needed to go into the portal. Having been trapped in the other dimension before, Alice refused to let her sister go alone. Together they stepped through the portal, allowing Andy to be released.
Hugs were shared all around – Andy even wrapping his arms around the stunned Roland. When Andy came to Felix, he said, "Thanks for not giving up on me."
Felix smiled. "Guess I'm as stubborn as you are." 'Unyielding' and 'determined' were perhaps more appropriate terms. As they hugged, Felix decided that he would not tell Andy about his intended swap. And as they all shared a relieved group hug (which even Mia, Viv, and Roland joined), Felix knew that he would always sacrifice himself, if it meant keeping Andy and the others safe.
NowhereBoys
To celebrate Andy's return, the boys and Ellen had a barbeque at Felix's house that weekend. No loud, crowded party this time – just a small gathering of the elemental powers, who had already been through so much together.
For the first time in months, Felix felt happy, at peace. Everything had turned out alright; he was with his friends. Their problems were over. He could relax and really start to test out his new fire powers.
While Ellen chatted energetically to Oscar, between bites of a veggie burger, and Andy attempted to explain the basics of quantum physics to Sam, Jake pulled Felix aside so he could talk to him. He looked intently at Felix for a moment, then promptly punched him in the arm.
"Ouch, what was that for?" Felix complained, rubbing the offended spot.
"For being an idiot."
Felix sighed. "Look, about Saskia, I really am sorry."
Jake rolled his eyes. "This isn't about that."
"And about giving Alice the talisman. I had to. I had to save Oscar. I hope you understand that. But I would never have jeopardized bringing Andy home."
"I know that."
"Good. Ow!" Jake had punched Felix again. "What?!"
"You're an idiot!"
Felix's face darkened. This conversation clearly wasn't going anywhere, and he didn't feel like standing around and being insulted – and assaulted. He shrugged and turned away, but Jake grabbed his arm.
"Felix, if you really thought trading yourself for Andy was the answer, then you're an idiot."
Felix shook off Jake's grasp, and glared at him defiantly. "Look, I'm glad I didn't have to do it, but it would have been right."
"We did it, we got Andy back. We figured it out without you sacrificing yourself. You never would have had to."
"The only reason we got Andy back was because Phoebe and Alice took his place. Someone still needed to go in. If it hadn't been them, it would have been me."
"No, you wouldn't –"
"You don't get it, Jake!" Felix shouted. "I would have! You all wanted Andy back so badly, and there was no alternative. An exchange needed to be made, and it would have been me. Don't you think I tried looking for other options? There weren't any. Phoebe and Alice are the only reason I'm still here."
"Alice is also the reason Andy was gone in the first place," Jake growled.
"I don't want to have this conversation," Felix declared. Why did they have to talk about this? Andy was back, wasn't that enough? He just wanted to get on with his life, and forget any of this had ever happened. Besides, he thought bitterly, when he thought it would get Andy back, Jake didn't have any complaints. At the warehouse, when Oscar had guessed his plan and revealed it to the others, Sam and Jake hadn't tried to talk him out of sacrificing himself. Only Ellen and Oscar had voiced any qualms.
He had felt torn. It was an odd feeling to know that his best friend and brother would miss him, to find some comfort in how desperately they clung to him, while wishing he hadn't held on so tightly to them, had pushed them away, so that he wouldn't hurt them when he left.
Felix knew that one of these days, he was going to hurt them if they stayed near him. But he was selfish. He couldn't let them go just yet.
If Jake, Sam, and Andy didn't want him around, however, if they still thought he was a freak and a loner, that was fine. He could be that. He would turn his back on them, if that was what they wanted. Felix started to turn his back on Jake, hoping to escape another refrain of "You're an idiot," but Jake caught his shoulder.
"Jake, just let me go!"
"What were you thinking, that we would want you to trade yourself for Andy? That, what, we would want you to sacrifice yourself or something? Did you think we wouldn't care if you were gone?"
Felix shrugged. Yeah, that was pretty much exactly what he thought.
"For someone so smart, you really are stupid, you know that?"
"It's been said a lot lately," Felix replied, coldly.
"You think Sam and I don't like you as much as we like Andy?"
"Well I did screw up your perfect existences," Felix muttered. "Almost got you killed, not to mention our mums. Caused all our families a lot of heartache."
"And got us really awesome powers."
"That we almost lost."
"You're difficult to talk to, you know that? Could you stop being cynical long enough to listen to what I have to say?" Felix crossed his arms over his chest and shrugged again, but he said nothing. Jake wasn't the kind of person who could easily express himself, and Felix was so dense he was having trouble making his point clear to him. It bothered him that Felix really couldn't see that he and Sam were just as much his friends as they were Andy's. Jake opened his mouth, but he couldn't find the words. He closed it, tried again. He gaped like a fish several times.
Felix scoffed. "Yeah, okay. Good talk."
Finally, it came to him. "Why didn't you tell us?" Jake asked.
"Tell you what?"
"That you were going to swap yourself for Andy. Oscar figured it out. He told us. Why didn't you want to tell us your plan?"
"I guess because you would have tried to stop me."
"Aha!"
"Oh, what now?"
"Why did you think we would try to stop you?"
"I don't know. Maybe cause you'd think it was stupid."
"Of course it was a stupid plan, and we would have tried to stop you. This self-sacrificial attitude is heroic and all, but nobody likes a martyr, Felix. You're a real dense prat if you think people wouldn't care if you were gone. If we didn't care about you, we wouldn't have tried to stop you. Instead of physically pulling you away from that portal, I would have let you go through. We're supposed to be friends, Felix. I thought you got that. We've gotta have each other's backs." Jake clapped a hand on Felix's back and smiled. "And I'll tell you something else, Felix. I'm glad we went to the alternate dimension. It changed my perception on a lot of things, ya know? But," Jake lowered his voice, "if you ever make me jump universes again, without my permission, you will live to regret it. Understand?"
Felix gave him a small, lopsided smile. "Yeah, I get it."
"Good." Jake clapped him on the back once more, and went to talk to Andy.
Friendship. Friendship was the reason Felix had been willing to swap himself for Andy, had been willing to let the Restoring Demon kill him in the Alternate Universe. He would do anything for his friends.
And, he guessed, he was learning what it was like to have friends that cared about him in return.
Felix found Oscar in the guest house that served as his bedroom. Oscar was worrying about his drawing. He still believed Felix would become trapped in the in-between dimension where Andy had been. "I drew the future. I know I did."
Felix gave him a reassuring smile. "Maybe the future changed."
Oscar considered his brother's face. No one understood his brother better than he did. He knew how Felix could be, and he knew that Felix's mind, his heart, never changed. "Maybe it just hasn't happened yet."