Chapter Ten
When I'm starting to drown you jump in to save me
The lab is shaping up again. Plastic sheeting is hanging up where the wall used to be, and the dust has settled down.
The Doctor is trying hard to act like everything is fine. "Now, we have to meet Sally tonight. So we need to not be late."
"We won't be late." Rose's voice is muffled by the sounds of the clean-up crew who were sent to sweep up the debris after the sonic screwdriver incident. "Unless we get invaded by aliens at some point."
"Well, that wouldn't be the first time, would it? So let's make sure we leave promptly and meet her at..." Here he falters for the slip of paper where he wrote down the address for the first house. "Well, wherever we said we'd meet her. Which I'm sure is someplace nearby and terribly convenient for us."
Rose carefully steps over a shattered glass jar. "I wrote it down," she tells him. "Oh! Here's something." She bends down and hands him a book.
"Well, this escaped damage, anyway." He tucks it under his arm. "It won't take long to set things right again, I suppose."
Rose had come back from a quick field mission to find the Doctor still at her desk. He'd been looking at schematics for the sonic screwdriver, trying to figure out what had gone wrong.
"You'll be back here in no time," she says. "Once your hand's all better. And then you can start making a new sonic screwdriver."
"Yeah." His hand currently feels like it's being roasted, but he doesn't tell her that. He's already visited Owen Harper for more pain medication, and doesn't think it'd be a good idea to take any more. Anyway, it's almost time to leave for the day, and then he can relax.
"Let's grab something to eat before we go," Rose says. "Fancy a biscuit?"
"Of course." He offers her his arm. "To the cafeteria?"
"Where else?"
oOoOo
They meet Sally Marshall after work. Luckily they were able to leave on time, despite a late-day incident. Today Sally is dressed in an ivory suit that has somehow resisted all stains. If Rose wore that color it would be dirty within an hour. As it is, her slim grey skirt has a smear of dust on the hem, and her black heels are scuffed from chasing a runaway piece of electronic energy from Kiev. The planet Kiev, not the city.
Then again, Sally probably isn't running around after aliens. Rose decides to overlook the spotless suit. The Doctor, of course, is immaculate in a blue dress shirt and dark trousers, despite the lab explosion and his part in subduing the electronic energy from Kiev. There are times when Rose really works at resisting the urge to muss his hair or wrinkle his shirt. The bandage on his hand is the only sign that he has not been having an absolutely uneventful, perfect day.
"Lovely to see you both," Sally says cheerfully. "Did you find the place all right?"
"Yes," the Doctor says, looking around. "No trouble at all."
"I have several properties for you," Sally says. "You're going to love them."
Rose is taken aback by such forceful enthusiasm. "That's great," she manages.
"Lovely. Now. This was built in 1987," Sally says, gesturing to the house in front of them. "Good bones. They just redid the outside - new windows and doors."
Rose and the Doctor nod as they look at it.
"It's lovely," the Doctor says, and Rose elbows him in the side. He coughs in response.
"I've got the key, here we are." Sally hurries up the walk, heels clicking along.
"Now, you mentioned that you were looking for a good-size house," she continues as she unlocks the front door. "Very wise. So many couples buy too small and then they have to look for a larger home later on. Are we expecting the pitter-patter of little feet anytime soon?" Sally laughs gaily at her own statement.
"Er..." Rose resists the urge to flee. She is saved from answering by the front door, which does not want to open. Sally gives it a bump with her hip and it swings wide. "Here we go!" she chirps.
Rose follows obediently, cursing her mother and making a note to find a new agent. The Doctor has a frown on his face and looks around him suspiciously, as if searching for small creatures with little feet, Sally's meaning lost to him.
"Come on, love." Rose links her arm through his. "If I have to do this, you have to do this."
"Rose, don't be silly. This was my idea." He walks with her inside and takes a good look around. And another look around.
And he keeps looking all around the room, with a slight frown on his face.
"Are you all right?" Rose says in concern.
He turns to look at her, and his face is a combination of confusion and fear. Rose's hand tightens on her arm.
"I'll just go peek at the kitchen," Sally says. "Come find me when you're ready."
"Doctor?" Rose says. "What is it? Talk to me."
It's just hit him, what they're doing. All of it. He's been made human and he's trying to grow a TARDIS and he thinks it's a great time for him and Rose to buy a house. A house. With doors and windows and a mortgage. He's a Time Lord, not a man who needs to do these pedestrian things. This is ridiculous.
But he's not a Time Lord, is he? Not anymore. What's he doing?
"Hello?" Rose says quietly.
"This isn't...it's a house," he says, feeling foolish.
"Love?" Rose asks tentatively when he doesn't say anything else.
"I just...it just hit me," he says slowly. "These houses are the same, aren't they? They don't change. They don't add on something you've forgotten. They don't move. They just...they stay the same. Always. And you live in it and you do the same things over and over in them."
"It doesn't grow bigger or smaller," she says carefully. "Is that what's going on?"
He sighs. "It's gone," he says, and she knows he's referring to the TARDIS. "The sooner I accept that the better."
"We don't have to do this," Rose says. No matter what she wants, she's not going to push him into something he doesn't want.
He's not sure what he wants at the moment, but he knows what he's supposed to be doing.
"We're here," he says. "If we're going to live an ordinary life we'd better get used to it, right?"
She shrugs. "Only if that's what you want. Honestly, it's all right with me."
"What do you want?" he asks her. "Do you want to live a life, day after day?"
She thinks about it. "It's our only chance," Rose says finally. "What else would we do with it?"
"Yeah." He nods slowly and looks around. "This room is a bit small, isn't it?"
She puts her arm through his, not at all sure she's ready for this herself. "Shall we go see the kitchen?"
He smiles at her, grateful that she understands him. "Yeah."
"All new tile on the floors," Sally tells them in the kitchen. "And a new range. Tile backsplash above the sink. And it looks like there's an herb garden out back."
The Doctor nods seriously, as though he understands every word Sally is saying. Rose rather doubts that he does, since he has very little to do with ranges, and no experience at all with backsplashes.
"What about the garden?" he asks, opening the back door.
"There's no storage building, but you'd be able to build one," Sally tells him, joining him outside.
Rose follows, standing next to the Doctor and putting her arm around his waist. It's a nice yard, with a few trees and a swing in the corner.
There is really nothing wrong with the house that she can see. The rooms have nice large windows and there's a cozy fireplace in the sitting room. The kitchen has a nice view of the garden. Rose looks around again.
"Plenty of room out here for company," Sally says. "Don't you think, Rose?"
Rose nods hesitantly. Honestly, she's not sure what she's looking for. Pete's mansion is beautiful and huge, and their flat is small and boring. Something in between that, she'd thought. She's been assuming she'll see a house she likes and they'll buy it. Not for the first time, she wonders if they rushed into this. She steps out onto the garden. There's a tiny garage at the end of the drive.
The Doctor walks out and stands beside her. "It's very small," he says to Sally. "The yard, I mean."
"The upstairs has four bedrooms," Sally says smoothly. "Plus a small office. Come and see." She heads back inside.
The upstairs is acceptable to Rose, but the bathroom is tiny, as are two of the bedrooms.
"I don't think so," she says to Sally. "It is a bit small." She feels foolish saying it, remembering the small flat she shared with Jackie back home. Living in the mansion didn't spoil her or make her want bigger and better things, but they do need more room than this.
"Well," Sally says, making a note on a clipboard, "it's only the first one we've seen." She smiles. "We'll just keep it at the top of your list until the next one. Shall we go? I have two more for you to see. Shall we get going before it gets too dark?"
Sally drives them to the next house in her car, a luxury sedan with leather seats that Rose sinks back into and has to fight her way out of. The Doctor gives her a hand getting out of the car. She suspects it's more because of the way her skirt slides up her legs than to be a gentleman. Because he's used his left hand he ends up slightly off-balance, falling against Rose and pinning her to the side of the car.
"Sorry." He'd caught himself with his injured hand and winces.
"All right?" Sally asks, looking concerned.
"Yes, thanks. Just an injury from earlier." He shoves his hand in his pocket and wishes for an ice cube. "Rose?"
"I'm fine," Rose says. "This is a nice house," she says, looking up the walk.
"This house is an excellent neighborhood," Sally says. "The school is around the corner and there are several parks nearby."
The house has a nice structure but it's decorated in floral chintz. Large roses bloom on the sofa, on chairs, and on the curtains.
"Very nice," the Doctor says approvingly.
Rose and Sally, who'd been exchanging a pained look at all the flowers, both turn in surprise.
"You like this?" Sally asks. She immediately covers her mouth with her hand, leading Rose to decide that she's really not that bad an agent.
"Of course." The Doctor gestures with his hand and they follow his gaze up. There's a skylight in the ceiling.
"You can have sunshine during the day and watch the stars at night," he says cheerfully. "A few too many flowers here, aren't there?" He looks around, frowning. "An awful lot of flowers. Don't you think, Rose?"
"This is a lovely model," Sally says. "I sold the one across the street just after it was built. Lovely family. They raise purebreds out in the country."
"Purebreds?" the Doctor asks in puzzlement. "In the country? Not here in their house?"
"She means dogs," Rose tells him. "Dogs, not children."
"Oh. Of course."
There is a garden in the back with a small swimming pool. It's a fine house but neither Rose nor the Doctor feels that compulsion to buy it. They stand in the garden and look around with blank expressions. Whatever they're supposed to be thinking and feeling, well, they're not. They're not sure what to do.
Sally senses their indecision. "Shall we talk about what else you'd like in a home?" she asks. "Are these styles not what you like? Are you looking for something bigger? Or smaller?"
Rose and the Doctor exchange a glance.
"I guess we just started out without being completely ready," Rose confesses.
"We thought it was time and then here we are," the Doctor finishes. He does not add that if Jackie hadn't called Sally, they wouldn't be in this awkward position right now, wondering what to do. It seems a bit embarrassing to admit that maybe you're not sure what to do with your life after all.
"All right." Sally is not convinced that things are as they should be, but she is professional enough not to pursue it. "Shall we look at the last house?"
"Yes," Rose says, trying hard to be eager. "That'd be great."
Behind her the Doctor sighs.
"It's new on the market today," Sally is saying. "It's not far from your flat."
The last house is large and dark and looks slightly forbidding. Rose has seen haunted houses that look more inviting.
"It's a bit...gothic," the Doctor says finally, unable to look away.
"Yes, but it's very nice inside. Let's go take a look, shall we?"
Rose is looking around the neighborhood. The other houses all have lights on and appear to be very inviting. She decides to take a chance on this one, even though the Doctor is radiating suspicion and dissatisfaction.
"It's just not very homey," he complains, even though he's not given the concept much thought before.
"You'll see," Sally says cheerfully, opening a door and ushering them inside.
The hallway is dark. Rose's instincts tell her to turn around. The Doctor apparently feels the same. He slides his arm around her waist to hold her close. This may make him feel better, but it makes it harder for Rose to defend herself if needed. She wriggles away but is promptly captured again.
"Let's see." Sally touches a switch and the hallway transforms into a black and white marble floor with black leather chairs. "Here we are!"
"Very nice," Rose says, relaxing and letting the Doctor hold her closer.
"The outside isn't the best," Sally admits, "but this looks nice enough. I was worried that we were walking into a witch's lair. After you." She waves her arm and Rose and the Doctor walk ahead.
"It's very nice," Rose says again. It is a nice looking house, but it seems cold and unwelcoming, and she can't imagine wanting to spend an hour here, let alone the rest of her life.
Sally is examining the room with a critical eye. "They used a decorator, but not a very good one."
"Is the heat turned off?" the Doctor asks, puzzled. "It's a bit cold in here."
Rose turns around, looking at the walls. "Maybe a window was left open."
"We can certainly fix that." Sally sets down her briefcase and walks to the back of the house. "I'll just see where they keep the thermostat. Shouldn't take more than a moment to fix it."
Rose can't shake the feeling that something in the house is wrong. The Doctor clearly feels the same way. He's held on to her hand and won't let go, not even when she tries to tug free.
"You can let go," she tells him. "I'm right here."
"I'm in pain," he says. "I need your support. Rose, do you notice something strange going on here? Strange apart from the fact that you and I are here trying to think about buying a house?"
"Strange like this house is acting all creepy and odd?"
"Yes. Exactly."
Even Sally, coming back into the room, appears distracted. "I've never felt like this in a house before," she confesses with a small laugh. "Like something's going to jump out at us and say boo!"
Rose has a sudden flashback to Chloe Webber's house, standing in front of the closet while a drawing came to life and tried to pull her in. She shivers. The Doctor puts his arm around her.
"It's only a house," he says. "Four walls and a door and windows, nothing alive. Although I hear that a kitchen is the heart of a home, so perhaps we can look at the kitchen?" What he really wants is to leave, to just go home and soak his hand in ice water and forget about houses for a while.
"Right through here," Sally says.
A creaking noise from the upstairs catches their attention as they pass the staircase to go into the kitchen.
"No one's supposed to be home," Sally says in confusion. "Hello-" She breaks off as the Doctor puts his hand on her arm.
"If someone were up there they would have heard us by now and come down," he says quietly.
"There are no pets here." Sally looks puzzled but not afraid. "Maybe they forgot we were coming."
"And were sleeping?" Rose finishes.
"Well." Sally is at a loss.
The Doctor starts to walk up the staircase.
"Wait," Rose protests.
"I'll just be a minute," he says. Another sound comes from the upstairs, and Rose is following him up.
"Come back," Sally says sharply. "We need to go."
They both turn to her. "What?" Rose asks.
"We need to go. Now." Sally picks up her things. "Come on. This is not right. We shouldn't be here."
"Sally, I'll check have a look and take care of it," the Doctor says. "Rose and I deal with things like this a lot."
"Something is wrong," Sally tells him. "We need to go."
"Sally, if something is wrong up there, we need to check it out," Rose says.
"No, we need to leave. Now." Sally walks to the front door and opens it.
"Sally," Rose begins, even as another sound comes from upstairs.
"Now," Sally says, and looks very angry. The Doctor nods and walks to the door. Rose follows him, glancing behind her and wondering what is going on.
Sally locks the house up and leads them back to her car. "All right. I'll see what other houses are on the market and call you later in the week, shall I?"
Rose is looking back at the house. Nothing is moving around in there, but it still feels spooky.
"Are you sure that it's okay to leave it?" she asks Sally.
"The owners will be back soon, and I'm sure there's nothing happening inside. We looked at the house and now we're done. I'll call you in a few days and we can talk about what else is on the market right now." Sally is talking very quickly, fumbling with her bag and briefcase as she tries to unlock her car.
"Fine," the Doctor says shortly. "We'll talk to you later."
They part ways on the sidewalk, waiting until Sally drives away. The Doctor starts walking down the street, and Rose has to work to keep up with him.
"Slow down," she finally complains. "I'm wearing heels, for goodness' sake."
He immediately slows down. "I'm sorry." He glances down at her shoes. "Are you all right?"
"Yeah. I just can't run very fast in them."
"Something was off tonight, Rose," he says. "Sally was not acting like her usual self."
"We've only met her twice," Rose points out.
"I know, but something still isn't right."
"Should we go back to the house?" It seems like the right thing to do but Rose really doesn't want to.
"No," he says slowly. "We can't break in because we heard a noise from the upstairs. Though I do wish I knew what was wrong with Sally tonight."
"Ooh, maybe she's been replaced by a body snatcher!" Rose suggests.
He rolls his eyes at her joke but grins down at her. "Where are we?"
Rose looks around. "I think about a mile from home."
"Well, it's not too late. What shall we do?" He looks down at her from the light of a streetlamp.
"You can buy me dinner someplace," she suggests.
"Okay." He takes her hand and heads down the street. "First place we find," he assures her. "I'm starving."
Over a dinner of not-too-bad pizza, Rose gathers up her courage.
"Are you happy here?" she asks.
"Well, the lighting's not too great, but the pizza's not bad. A bit overdone. The stuff we had in Rome in 2417 was much better, remember?"
"Yeah." She does remember. The pizza that night was hot and cheesy and their table was lit by candles whose flames danced in a programmed pattern. It had been a fun night and it had been more than a lifetime ago.
"That's not what you meant."
She smiles. "No."
"Am I happy here in this world?"
She nods, not trusting herself to speak.
"I'm happy, Rose. I've been with you and without you, and believe me, I prefer to be with you."
"You didn't ask for this, though."
"Rose, we've been over and over this. How many times will I tell you before you believe me?"
"When you tell me you believe me." She says the words in a rush, and he stares at her, mouth slightly open.
"You ask if I'm happy, here, with you," she says, "and I am. I am happy and I tell you the truth but you don't believe me. It doesn't matter where we are or what we're doing - you don't believe me, not all the way."
"I believe you," he says. "Rose."
"It wasn't my choice but I know this was meant to happen. You and me, this was meant to happen."
He smiles wryly. "You saw my creation, did you, before I took the Time Vortex away?"
"No." She smiles despite the knot in her stomach. "Don't be silly. I love you. I love you more with every day and I'm so happy that it doesn't seem real. I couldn't stand it if you weren't as happy with me."
"I am!" He leans across the table so she can hear him better in the crowded restaurant. "Rose, I've never lied to you. I knew the possibilities for me. If it hadn't been for you maybe I would have stayed with him on the TARDIS. Been an odd sort of relationship, but you don't get to choose family, do you? He couldn't stay with you but I could. So I did."
She brushes her fringe out of her eyes. "Even if the TARDIS never grows? Even if we never leave this planet?"
"If we never leave this planet I will be content," he says. "I've seen everything in the known universe and then some. This is where I want to be."
"Okay." She wets her lips and smiles. "This is where I want to be, too. With you."
He tilts his head to look at her consideringly. "Enough to want to buy a house?"
"Yeah. Definitely."
"From Sally Marshall?"
She laughs. "Maybe we'll give her another chance."
"Maybe we ought to find another agent," he corrects her.
"Mum said she's the top estate agent at her company, the last three years."
"She's strange, Rose."
"Maybe. We'll give her one more chance, yeah? And then we'll fire her."
He is satisfied with that. "Deal."