AN: Okay, so ArumAnimus picked me up on something that honestly I hadn't even noticed I was doing... I've been rounding off chapters in ways that it could end there, and would be fine... And I think I realised why.

Prepare for a slightly long rant, feel free to continue to the chapter if you don't care! XD

So when I first started writing fanfiction, I was what... 13 or 14? Either way, I wasn't very good at it, but I didn't care, so I just wrote and uploaded whenever. I didn't have a schedule like I do now (I upload every 3-4 days if you hadn't noticed), and instead just uploaded a bunch of chapters at once and then wouldn't have any updates for a long while... Eventually, I would end up abandoning the stories, because school would start or I'd realise it was awful. (None of them are on here anymore, I deleted them ages ago) I never finished any of them, and they rotted in a dark corner of my computer's hard-drive. Sometimes I go back and look at them, and think "why did I write this?" (there's some awful stuff there guys, seriously). Then, I discovered BBC Sherlock, and began writing again. I mainly wrote one-shots, because at least I'd finish them then... I started to branch a little bit into other fandoms, but it never really lasted. Then, for Camp NaNoWriMo, I started a massive fanfiction known simply as "The Days With You" (The first chapter is up on here I think, I really should update that more)... But when Camp NaNoWriMo ended, it wasn't finished, and I didn't have to motivation to keep going with it. The same thing happened with the same story this year. I'm 19 now, and my writing has improved massively thanks to those one-shots, but I know I have a ways to go...

So... To the point of this random story! I have NEVER finished a long story. Not ever. So, I have the ever-present fear that I'll drop a story unfinished, and I don't want to do that to you guys, cause I know there are at least a few people that look forward to my updates.

So I think that's why I always round off chapters. Because I don't want to leave you guys with unfinished crap if things get in the way. But I'm gonna try and improve! I have some great plans for this story, and I don't want this stupid fear to get in the way of that. I want to thank you guys for sticking with this story and with me.

I'm gonna do better! Enjoy the chapter guys :)

Friday August 22nd 2014

Dear Diary,

I'm back in my room now. I think he got tired of having me hovering around all the time.

But then, he's always like that, so maybe he really was just worried about me? I don't know… I wish I could understand him better, but he's so cryptic, and reserved… And why have I fallen in love with someone who probably just finds me annoying?

Because… Because he's amazing… He's brilliant… And I love him… And I wish he'd love me, but I don't know if that will ever happen.

I'm okay with that… So long as I can stay by his side, I'll be happy.

Anyway… One week until school starts properly. It's going to be strange having to plan my timetable again, but it'll be nice to actually learn stuff in lessons, rather than going over all the old stuff.

It's late, I should go to bed…

Saturday August 23rd 2014

Dear Diary,

I woke up early this morning… I still do that, even though I don't do the mail at the moment… I kind of miss doing it.

Ellen was in the library all day. I don't know why I'm writing that down, because it's no different to every other day… But yeah…

Hieronymous seemed very reserved today, but I suppose it's just because he's tired and still recovering. Still, I'm glad he's well enough to leave his room again, even if he can't do much else. He was grumbling about the fact that Potsdam cleared his schedule today. He's kind of adorable when he complains like that…

Did I just call a grown man adorable? Yeah… I did, didn't I? Well, he is… To me anyway.

Sunday August 24th 2014

Dear Diary,

Hieronymous is still tired, and still grumpy.

It's still cute.

Ellen is worrying me… She keeps muttering about needing evidence for her theories… I really hope she doesn't start experimenting again. She said she wouldn't, but Ellen's the type to do anything for her research.

Monday August 25th 2014

Dear Diary,

Sometimes I wonder how I don't die of boredom in these damn lessons… We were practising EMPATHY for god's sake… Seriously, Potsdam? You couldn't think of anything more interesting to recap?

Okay, it wasn't really because it was boring that I hated it… It was because I already knew what the spell would reveal whenever I cast it on someone…

They all think I'm a freak.

Is it so wrong to be in love? I know he's my teacher… but…. He's my husband… And I love him…

I can't help it.

A few tear-stains smudged the words of Monday's entry.

Tuesday August 26th 2014

Dear Diary,

Today I would have had Red Magic if Hieronymous' schedule hadn't been wiped. He got irritated when I mentioned it, bless him… He's so used to a full schedule, I don't think he understands free time. I suggested he read, and I think he took it on board, maybe… I spent my day drawing. I mostly drew him.

Oh yeah, Ellen stopped muttering today. I hope this means she's given up on getting evidence, but I have a bad feeling.

Wednesday August 27th 2014

Dear Diary,

Having what is essentially a second weekend sucks more than I thought it would… I got really depressed today… So depressed, I forgot to go to lunch, and Hieronymous came to check on me. I must have looked awful when I opened the door, but I don't think he noticed. He didn't seem angry, just worried.

It just all kind of… collapsed on top of me, you know? I miss my parents… It's been two months and I still don't think it's sunk in that I'm never going to see them again… I'm still confused and upset over the reactions people are having to my feelings for Hieronymous… And I'm still worried that nothing is going to come of it.

I broke down in front of him. I'd already had a break down, but just the fact that he was there and worried was enough to send me over the edge again.

I've always found that I can hold myself together if I'm alone (usually), but when someone asks me what's wrong, I just break… I wish that didn't happen.

He sat with me while I cried. He didn't offer any words, but I don't think he knew what to say. I'm glad actually; it usually makes me worse when people try to comfort me. It was more than I could ask for that he sat with me and seemed willing to listen to me bawl about my parents.

I didn't tell him about anything else. Saying anything about either of the other things that were upsetting me would be a sure-fire way of pushing him away, and I need him right now.

Ellen was in the library all day again, I think… So she doesn't know about my break-down.

I don't think I'll tell her.

Thursday August 28th 2014

Dear Diary,

I managed to convince Ellen to put away her research and spend the morning with me. She looked like she was going to have a nervous breakdown from not having a book in her hand at one point… I shouldn't have found it funny, but it was.

I nearly managed to drag her to Black Magic class… But she squirmed away. Ah well, the morning was fun. We ended up chasing each other around the courtyard. I felt like a little kid again.

I noticed Hieronymous stood by his window at one point, so I waved. He seemed surprised that I'd seen him. I hope he's not too bored without lessons to teach. Maybe I'll see if he wants some company tomorrow morning…

Friday August 29th 2014

Dear Diary,

He was awkward this morning, like… more than he has been this week… and when I asked if he wanted some company he said he had things to do. He was awkward at lunch and dinner too… I don't get it. What could he possibly have to do? Potsdam cleared his schedule. I know I shouldn't worry, but when it comes to him I just can't help it.

I've never been in love before, is worrying normal? I'm so confused…

Ellen spent the day in the library again. I think she's panicking a bit because the holiday is nearly over and when term starts she won't have much chance to work on her theories. She was muttering again when she came back, and it worries me…

Seems all I do is worry about stuff at the minute.

Saturday August 30th 2014

Dear Diary,

It's five in the morning, and I didn't sleep at all last night. I don't really know why. I mean, sure I'm worried about stuff, but it doesn't normally stop me sleeping. I don't feel tired… I did, like two hours ago. But now it's as if I've had five cups of coffee or something. It's irritating.

I wish I understood what's going on in my head. It feels like there's too much going on. It's giving me a headache and I can't think straight…

I think I'll go for a walk.

Quietly, she closed the small book and slipped it under her pillow, realising she'd need to buy a new one for the next year. She found it a little strange, but helpful, that diaries went by academic years and not actual years, meaning that the diary she was currently using lost its usefulness when August became September.

With that in mind, she ventured into her storage closet and, after donning a pair of dark jeans and a fitted t-shirt, reached up to pull down her blue handbag and purse, in which was stored her allowance. Slinging it over her shoulder, Arianna stepped out of the closet to see that the mail had been delivered while she was getting dressed. With a shrug, she picked up her envelope and left the room, with an inadvertent spring in her step.

Winding her way through the halls, she found herself in the courtyard, breathing in the crisp morning air with a sigh of relief. The sun was peeking over the mountains, but a thin mist hovered in the air, keeping the air cool. Autumn was in the air, even though the trees weren't showing any weakness yet.

Arianna let her head turn to look up at his window. The curtains were drawn, white material veiling his rooms in a shroud of mystery nearly nobody could push aside. Arianna couldn't help the small satisfied smile that alighted on her face at the thought that she was one of the privileged to know what was behind that misty veil.

As she walked, she waited for the real mist to lift, for when it did it would be time to go and eat breakfast with her husband.

As usual, the silence, which was broken only by her muffled footsteps, meant that her mind was free to wander to the causes of her worry and grief.

Her parents' faces appeared in her mind, and tears welled in her eyes as she remembered walking through the woods with them whenever they went on holiday, headphones stuffed in her ears with her iPod on shuffle. She would always skip a bunch of songs, but the random element was what kept her mind busy, thrilled by the anticipation of what song might be next, away from depressing thoughts and worries. Without that thrill, her mind was free to explore the darkest corners of her mind, pulling doubts and fears from the shadows and plunging her headfirst into their icy depths.

Her parents' faces melted away as a single tear dripped down her cheek, replaced by an image of Ellen bent over her desk, examining a small camera. A door opens, her head turns, eyes wide with panic as she hides the camera. Arianna was vaguely aware of her fists clenching and her eyes closing as she came to a stop in the middle of the path. She took a deep breath and dispelled the image of her friend being expelled.

As her eyes opened again, another image swam into her vision. Her husband's face, cold and distant, frowning at her as if she was a stranger that had bumped into him… She felt as though a hand had clamped around her heart, and she slumped against a tree, letting her head fall into her hands as she drew her legs up to her chest and tears slipped through her fingers silently.

Everything seemed to be working against her…

Thought I'd try a different format for today's chapter :) I hope you liked it guys x It's hard to not round stuff off when nothing dramatic is happening... yet... *evil smirk*