AN: HELLO YES I STILL EXIST XD

So... A lot of stuff has been going on in my life which has meant that writing has been difficult. Personal issues combined with the sheer amount of work I've had for university (I had to get extensions for a couple of them :/) have left me physically and mentally drained.

But here is a new chapter! It is short, but I felt like I should at least give you something :)

ALSO to my dear reviewers Sylvia S (I'd have replied sooner but you were a guest so I couldn't!) thank you so much for your wonderful reviews :) they have been wonderful to read and a great confidence boost :) I would be glad to talk to you properly x

Now, ON WITH THE STORY!

Wednesday 3rd September 2014

Dear Diary,

I haven't seen him all day. I can't bring myself to face him, not after yesterday's fiasco… I found comfort in hugging my old teddy. My Dad bought it to give to me on the day I was born. Back then, it was as big as me…

I remember when I was little and I'd cry, he'd always pick Freddy up and put on a silly voice, telling me not to cry and making him dance until I smiled again. They're vague memories, but nice ones.

But every time I think of a nice memory of my Dad, my brain conjures up the memory of him staring at me like a stranger, a gun to my throat… I wish I could separate them. The man with the gun wasn't my Dad, that man never had a daughter.

I wonder sometimes what they think my old room is for… We took all my stuff out while they were both at work (does that count as stealing?) leaving just the furniture… Maybe they use it as a spare bedroom now, Mom always considered making it one when I left for College.

She had to stop writing as tears threatened to spill onto the pages again. Scrunching her eyes shut, Arianna closed the book and looked to the yellowing bear. His matted fur was coming off in places, and one ear had fallen off several times, the dark brown stitches used to sew it back on made that obvious. Gingerly, she picked him up, smoothing a tuft of fur with her thumb.

A part of her felt as though she ought to return the bear to the box of memories, never look at it again. Perhaps complete severance with her old life would be best for her. A clean slate.

She sighed. A clean slate was impossible. That clean slate had been filled with writings of her marriage, and the husband that had come from it. To have an entirely clean slate from anything that had caused her pain was an impossibility now, so why try? Why should she distance herself from all the happy memories for the sake of one horrific one?

The door swung open then and Virginia blustered into the room, throwing a pristine history book onto the bed. Arianna had seen it on her friend's bookshelf multiple times, but the red head had never opened it. Arianna tucked Freddy away to hide him and turned her attention to the angry girl as she kicked her bed hard, then swore loudly as the pain shot into her foot.

"Virginia?" Arianna called, surprised at how strong she'd managed to make her voice considering she hadn't used it all day. Virginia's head whipped around to look at Arianna, her curls following a second later, and bouncing around her enraged face, flopping over one of her eyes. She looked as if she'd gone crazy, and if Arianna had more energy, she might have flinched. "What's wrong?" That simple question was enough to make Virginia explode.

"YOUR GODDAMN HUSBAND NEEDS A SERIOUS ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT!" Virginia bellowed. "I JUST GOT 20 DEMERITS BECAUSE HE WAS IN A BAD MOOD!? So I didn't read the chapter! That's not worth 20 demerits! God, and you wonder why people call him Grumpy Old Grabby!?" the red-head huffed, collapsing on her bed and pulling out a packet of biscuits from under her bed, tearing it open violently and spraying crumbs all over herself. With a grumble, she stuffed a biscuit into her mouth and crushed it in a matter of seconds.

Arianna gulped. It was her fault he was in a bad mood.

"What was he like in Blue Magic? He didn't give you demerits did he?"

"I… I wouldn't know. I didn't go…" Virginia froze, another biscuit halfway towards her mouth as she looked up at her academic friend with an expression of shock.

"You skipped?" her anger had momentarily vanished in the wake of awe at this revelation. She thought for a moment, as Arianna nodded, that she'd misheard. "You skipped?" she repeated. Arianna sighed and nodded. "I might faint! Why the heck did you skip!? It was Blue Magic, I thought that was your favourite." She laced it with undertones that Arianna quickly translated to because he teaches it.

"Because I'm the reason he's in a bad mood." She muttered sadly, drawing her knees up to her chest and staring at the wall. Virginia frowned.

"What? What could you possibly have done to make him so grumpy?" she sounded incredulous; Arianna was a good student, she always followed the rules, she studied… Sure she could be a bit over-affectionate, but that was no reason to take offense with the rest of the world.

"I broke the rules… I did something really stupid… I'll bet he's ashamed to even be associated with me…"

"Bullshit." Arianna's head snapped up to look at her foul-mouthed friend. "So you broke a rule once, big deal! If he's pissed off with you for that, he's grumpier and dumber than I thought." She paused, taking in the short pink sleeves adorning her friend's shoulders. Pyjamas… "You haven't left the room today have you?" Arianna shook her head very slightly. Virginia rolled her eyes. "Girl, you get way too worked up about this guy!" That comment managed to make a small smile grace Arianna's tear-stained face.

"I know." She said weakly.

"Sorry, what was that? I couldn't hear you through the unnecessary worry…" The redhead held a hand to her ear and finally, a light giggle came from Arianna's lips.

"I said I know, you deaf cow." She said, louder. Virginia smirked.

"That's better! Now get dressed and come to dinner, or Ellen will go nuts."

With another small smile, Arianna nodded and clambered out of bed, grabbing her grey and green robes and pulling them on.

The two girls made their way down the hall, Virginia babbling about her plans to set up the sports team again. Arianna didn't really pay much attention to what she was saying, but was glad of the conversation, one-sided though it was. It washed over her, pushing away the cloud of despair; a pocket of sunshine in an endless storm. She was determined to savour it.

When the doors to the dining hall opened, Arianna's first instinct was to scan the room, but she forced herself not to, because she'd seen Virginia's shoulders tense, her hand curling into a fist, ready to bolt or beat a certain professor up if he upset her again. A warmth ignited in Arianna's chest as she started towards the tables of food, her stomach suddenly grumbling. Oh yeah, you haven't eaten all day…

Foolish girl. His voice echoed in her mind, causing her to pause in the centre of the room.

"Arianna?" Virginia asked, clearly trying not to sound too concerned. With a shake of her head, she threw Virginia a small smile and received a nod in return, and they continued on their way.

If Professor Grabiner was there, Arianna didn't see him. Ellen arrived soon after she and Virginia had sat down and they had talked animatedly of random, unimportant gossip. Who was going out with who, who Donald had recently decided to prank, which of the new freshmen were most likely to join the sports club.

The hall was practically empty when they finally realised the time and returned to their room. They sat up on their beds and Virginia shared out some of her sweets.

They laughed until the early hours and fell asleep with smiles on their faces. It was the most carefree Arianna had felt for a long while.

But as the moon disappeared behind a thick bank of cloud, dark shadows cast across her dreams, the image of her husband stood at his window staring out at the black sky, a glass in his hand and a storm in his mind.

Ominous ending!

Hieronymous: You have made me seem like an alcoholic...

MysticPuma: ... Ooops :P