Despairing the Light

Even the darkness is more comforting,
than the horrible light that shine upon you.

A young Terumi sat by the garden again, swinging her feet back and forth as she eyed the boy with yukata, who came to sit by her. She turned her head away from him, but seeing his facial expression, she panicked and looked at him. In his hands was a scroll instead of the usual Japanese Literature book he always had. Koujirou bit his lip in anger, silently passing it to her.

"Terumi...from today on, you..." He sucked in a breath. "...Are my informant."

She blinked a few times before her eyes widened. In excitement. But she knew why Koujirou was so hesitant and upset about it. His parents obviously set this up, making them know each other from young so that she was someone they could trust. It couldn't be helped anyway, since she came from a family of informants.

"Koujirou, I won't die so easily." She held his hand gently, as he choked back a few tears. "Don't be sad."

"You don't get it." He hicked. "Yuushi-san died you know, he died protecting my dad and that man doesn't even care."

"I know."

"That's how they're treating your existence! If you're an informant, my shield...then you're not even human any more...!" His eyes shot up and he felt her arms around him. Terumi placed his head on her shoulder to comfort him.

"I admired Yuushi-san since I first met him. He was such a bright and funny guy, and he was smart too. As an informant he did so well and your father seemed to like him as well. I'm sure he just doesn't express it well, like you. Human or not, I'm still your friend. Isn't that enough?"

"Idiot, you're too easy about this. Usually Yuushi-san will be like: Oho, I'm a genius so it's fine! Aha...what am I doing..."

"That was a good impersonation. You're good at copying him as per usual, but I like the normal Koujirou better. I guess I've got to call you Sasaki-dono in the premises. Right, Sasaki-dono?"

"Don't call me that when we're alone. Promise me that."

"I promise."

They were praying in front of a grave, the rain pouring onto them relentlessly. They had no umbrella, and yet they had not budged from their place. Koujirou's face was struck with a tortured expression, yet no tears were coming out of his eyes. Beside him, Terumi could only stare at the grave stone that wrote the name of Koujirou's first vampire hunting partner. Losing such a person was hard. Yuushi was already a fine example.

As friends they were great. But as comrades, the two failed the dead man greatly. They underestimated their opponent and ended up almost dead but he jumped in to save them. A mission success, but the loss of a man's life was much more than that. No one else other then them cared much though. Terumi felt a heavy weight on her heart. She failed to get enough information, so he died...

"Terumi don't blame yourself."

" Koujirou, I didn't do my job well. That's why Kousaka-"

"Don't blame yourself."

"..."

How would she get enough information? There wasn't any ways for her to get anything with her physical abilities or what so not. Just what was there...just anything. If it meant saving her friend, the man she loved and the people that were close to her, she'll do it. So that next time there will be no casualties.

All the methods didn't work and now she was waiting for her target to arrive. This was the last resort. Time was running out on her. All she needed to do is figure out about the vampire groups that were around this area and their actions. Soon enough, a young man with a hood on came by her.

"Yo young miss. You're offering your blood for the info, no?"

"Correct. Go ahead if you must- just tell me everything you know."

"I like your conviction. Are you sure you're not cheating on your man? He seemed pretty peeved when you told him you were out to meet another man."

"I'm not dating him and... this is what I do for him."

"Ahaha, okay then. Oh, such unblemished skin... your first time given willingly to me, how rare. I like your personality, so I'll tell you all you want."

He slowly pierced into her neck, watching her wince in pain as he drew blood from her. Indeed she was rare, showing such a stubborn expression despite the pain. The vampire drank mercifully, even patching up her wound after he was done. Terumi's face was pale and tired by then.

"Why... are you sparing me?" She asked weakly, only having a smile returned.

"Because I like your spunk. Now of the information..."

It had been going well all these years and to suddenly hear that her best informant had died by the hands of a demon. Koujirou was after him, but she made sure the two wouldn't die but she never knew that a mercenary demon would be hired to kill him. And now, she was being chased down by a half-vampire: the one that he turned. She did remember him mentioning about revenge, but she never thought that she would be the one hunted down.

"You...you're Vidro's friend..."

Terumi's feet could only force itself forward as the crazy chaser behind her continued to hunt her down. If anything, she must at least reach into the safe zone where her home was so that they could kill him in time. She mustn't die there. Not when Koujirou was still alive and waiting for her to come home for dinner. As she saw the corner where the gates were...

"AHHHHHHH!"

A werewolf bit down on her feet, pulling her down all together. Since she was already tired from running, it easily tore her tendons off, making her scream in excruciating pain. The half-vampire laughed hysterically, slowly approaching her as she suffered. If she felt pain, it would be his pleasure. A dying human. A dying-

"TERUMI! YOU FUCKING BASTARD, I'LL KILL YOU!"

A sword immediately went through his body, a blue flame engulfing it. As it withdrew from his body, it also cut the werewolf into half, making it dissipate. Koujirou worriedly ran towards the heavily injured woman, whose legs could move no longer. The vampire hunter suddenly noted of all the other wounds on her body, though unaware of where they came from.

"Koujirou...Koujirou, I can't walk...I can't feel my feet..."

"Hang in there. I beg you just stay with me okay?"

"Yes..." She pulled on his sleeve as he carried her in his arms, calling for the guards to deal with the situation as he rushed her to the treatment room. If he only knew that this was due to her affiliation with vampires, sacrificing her blood for information...oh how he would hate to hear that.

Now Terumi was all alone. Evertime, someone important dies in the summer. First is Yuushi, then Kousaka, followed by Vidro and now? Koujirou. How did she not notice this coming? In some way or another their deaths were all related to her. Everyone who mattered died. Was there anything else that mattered any more? Sure, there was her brother, but he didn't know whatever was going on.

He lived a peaceful, happy life. Another thing was that his best friend was the one who killed Vidro. Perhaps she hated Kouji, but if anything, she would say that he held a certain importance to her. In the end they were siblings after all. So at the very least, she should tell him goodbye. So there were no regrets. The world is cruel, after all.

"So you're sleeping deeply... you're using Koujirou's yukata as a blanket? Heh, I'm jealous. Well, sweet dreams and...goodbye."

She rolled her wheelchair back to her room, where her futon was ripped to pieces by her hysterical outbreak at the sight of Koujirou's ashes and his pendant, which she left by Kouji's side. Her logical sense began disappearing again, a load of screaming filling up her head. If she was going to live like this, with these horrible voices inside her head...

Terumi held a silver knife in her hands.

She plunged it into her chest.

Authors Notes: A full Terumi flashback to briefly show you how she got to this point, and her solution to Koujirou's death. People die, and we know that as facts. It's unfortunately true isn't it? She isn't completely crazy yet, but she is on the path to insanity indeed. Subaru-kun, your wish as been granted! (Go check the previous chapters again if you don't remember what I'm talking about).

I'm back from hell. Again.

Thanks for reading! R&R very much appreciated! (pls)