Legalities: Supernatural belongs to Eric Kripke and the CW Network. I am not making any money from this. I am simply playing in the amazing sandbox that is the Supernatural Universe.

Warnings: This is my take on what would have been bad enough to send Sam into a confessional as a child. Taken from a comment made by Sam in the season 8 finale "Sacrifice".

It's unabashed hurt Winchester. Dean suffers because of a choice that Sam makes in a moment of selfish anger. Will he get the chance to make things right before Dean is destroyed forever? Can their father put aside his own obsessive anger and his need to hunt long enough to track down both Sam and Dean? Or will his obsession destroy his sons.

If you do not like the violence, then DO NOT read this story. It revolves around the brothers and their relationship and this idea wouldn't leave me alone. So here is my take on the one and only time Sam confessed his greatest sins.

Rating: T with possible upgrade to MA at a later point if it takes a really dark turn.

NO SLASH/ BROTHERLY LOVE AND FAMILY ANGST ONLY

Please Review if you want to see this one continue. Okay, so there is a problem with this posting, so I am going to reload it. I'm sorry if you get multiple notifications. Apologies.

Chapter Seventeen

Sightless Remedy

Dean sat in the Impala staring out at a field. The sun was just starting to set, the brilliant rays fanning across the summer sky in shades of orange and purple. He inhaled deeply and let the scent of dirt and grass slide along his lungs as a smile pulled at the corner of his lips. He finally shoved open the door and climbed from inside the car into the gently cooling air. The moon was just starting to rise…it was one of those huge slightly orange harvest moons.

He turned and walked to the trunk, popping it open with a practiced ease…he grinned when he saw the box of fireworks. A sudden feeling of confusion washed through him and he licked his lips as he tried to figure it out. Something made him want to keep digging inside that trunk…like there should be something else beneath the fireworks. But that couldn't be true…could it? Dean shook his head and grabbed box. He turned and set it down on the grass.

As he reached up to slam the trunk closed that nagging feeling that 'something' wasn't right assaulted him again. Dean's gaze flashed around the surrounding area and finally it occurred to him what was wrong…where was his brother? He'd hustled for two weeks to earn the money to buy these fireworks and now he was utterly alone…what fun was that?

"Dean?" Sam's voice cut through the darkness.

He spun around toward the direction of his little brother's voice…but there was nothing there. It was like the words had descended from nothingness.

"Sammy?" He called. Dean shifted his weight from left to right and blinked in the low light. From behind him he heard a twig crack and he spun on his heel.

There in front of him was a man he'd never seen before. "Who are you? Where's my brother?" A feeling of unease settled in his stomach and Dean was almost afraid of what this unknown person would say.

The man was about two inches shorter than Dean. He had dark hair…almost black and eyes that were a brilliant blue color. He knew that he shouldn't be able to see the man as clearly as he could…but for some reason it didn't bother him. The stranger stepped forward and leaned over, picking up the twig from the weeds. He proceeded to break it into smaller pieces. "You wonder where your brother is?" It was like the guy was answering Dean's question without answering a damned thing.

"Yeah, rainman…that's what I just asked." Dean stepped forward, his fingers closing into a fist. "Now…answer the question."

The man's eyebrows rose and he thinned his lips in irritation. "You will not find him here."

"What? You're not making any sense." His own irritation was rising rapidly along with his fear.

"Whom do you seek?" The rough voice was grating on Dean's last nerve.

"Jesus yoda…I just told you that." His green eyes panned the surrounding area and he found that they were no longer in a field, but in stone room…like a basement. "Where the hell are we? How did we get here?" He blinked. "Where's my freaking car?"

"Whom do you seek?" The man repeated without moving a muscle.

Dean swallowed hard. "My brother." He shot back.

"Which one?"

That question got his full attention. There was no way that he could have heard that right. Dean only had one brother…didn't he? As he tried to think two sets of memories invaded his consciousness and was driven to his knees under the onslaught. Sam. Adam. Two brothers…both as real as he was…and then there was his mother…and his father.

"I ask you again…which one?" The stranger stepped forward, though he did not offer to touch Dean.

"How can there be two?" Dean forced past the pain. It was more than just physical at this point…it was emotional and he felt as though his life had been torn apart. "I don't understand…"

The man nodded. "He said that you would not. But you must decide, Dean Winchester…which brother do you want?" He paused for a moment. "Which 'life' do you want?"

"Who's 'he'?" Dean muttered softly. He rubbed at the back of his neck in an attempt to alleviate the pain of the piercing headache. "I can't have two lives…"

"No. You cannot. Which is why you must choose." A crack of thunder ripped through the air outside the building and it shook with the tremendous power of the building storm.

"Please…I don't understand." Dean's voice shook with the effort of speaking past the slicing agony of his head.

"One life will be easy…one life will be filled with pain and sorrow…but within this second life there is one that 'needs' you…without you, he will be lost." The azure blue of the stranger's eyes reflected internal light that Dean couldn't identify.

"Sam…" He whispered. And suddenly there was no choice…he 'knew' that Adam was not real. Even knowing that being with Sam would be painful and full of sorrow and guilt, there was no choice. As his heart settled on an answer, his body lit up in pain. He clenched his teeth together and forced his eyes open. "I choose Sam." His strained whisper bounced off the walls of the room.

A small sad smile edged onto the strangers lips. "Then Sam, it shall be." He turned and started to walk away.

Pain was now the only sensation that Dean could feel. But he managed to throw one more question at the being. "Who are you?" He cried out. The muscles on his neck were standing out against his pale skin as they bunched with pulses of pain.

The man turned and smiled one last time. "It is not time for you to know me, Dean. I will rescue you…I promise." And with that he was simply gone. "Good bye, Dean Winchester." The words floated through the air and penetrated like water through a sieve.

Dean hunched forward as his stomach balled up and contracted. Tears sprang to his eyes as every nerve twisted in pain…he bit back the cry of agony that threatened to steal what was left of his dignity.

XXXX

Sam was ready to crawl from his hospital bed and kill every one of the nurses and doctors that kept evading his questions. He'd had it with being treated like a child…he wasn't and he knew that he would never find anything out about Dean until he went looking on his own. Both his father and Bobby had been scarce since the whole episode with Dean five days prior. All they had told him was that Dean was alive…but something had happened once his brother had been removed from their shared room.

His ocean colored eyes panned over his room and he sighed at the reminder of their failure. He glanced over at the small clock on the wall; it was two in the morning. The footsteps outside his room had died long ago. Sam took a deep breath and reached for his crutches.

He slipped from his warm bed and pulled the hospital robe tighter against the chill in the air. The cast on his leg was growing more and more uncomfortable the longer he wore it. If he ever broke his leg in the future he hope to hell that he broke it beneath the knee. Because the full leg cast that he was sporting was itchy as hell.

The dark hallway was empty as Sam clicked along slowly. The 'pop' 'pop' 'pop' of the rubber on the bottom of his crutches resounded through the lowly lit corridor. He was careful to avoid the nurse's desk at the end, which meant using the stairs. He was definitely not looking forward to hauling his sore body up two flights, but he needed to see Dean.

It took his nearly fifteen minutes to make the journey and sweat was pouring down his back by the time he shoved his way through the last double door. The ICU was brightly lit, though it too was fairly empty at this time of night.

A television as playing in the background, though Sam had no idea what old sitcom it was. He ignored the sounds and moved toward room seven. A male nurse yawned and picked up his coffee mug and then frowned in displeasure.

"Why is the coffee always gone." He grumbled before rising and heading toward the staff break area.

Sam pulled in a deep breath and clicked past the empty desk and shoved his way through Dean's door. Once inside the room he finally released his pent up breath. It took a moment for his eyes to adjust to the lowered lights inside the ICU room. The smell was the same as on his floor. One thing that never seemed to change was the nasty antiseptic smell of hospital rooms.

His gaze slipped to the figure in the bed and his eyebrows cut down in concern.

Dean was lying in the bed with wires and leads attached to nearly every part of him. He couldn't see it clearly, but his brother's face was dark with bruising…and his upper body was bound in white bandaging. There was a nasal cannula under his nose and the IV running into his arm was clearly pumping more than simple sodium chloride.

Sam moved and settled his tired body on the bed near Dean's hip. He reached out and smoothed the hair from Dean's forehead. He'd never seen his brother look so young before. He looked away as a lump formed in his throat and threatened to overwhelm him.

When he turned back he found himself hopelessly unprepared for the intensity in his brother's wide open eyes. Dean was watching him.

"Dean?" He asked.

Dean blinked in response. "Sammy…" He breathed quietly.

Sam's heart thundered in his chest when he saw the tear slip silently down his stronger than nails older brother's cheek. It was only one…it was all Dean ever allowed himself and Sam knew it. But he'd only seen it once before when their father had nearly died on a hunt. It was no less profound now as he stared at his brother's emotion-filled eyes.

"I'm so sorry, Dean." His voice shattered as he dropped his eyes in shame. Every fiber of Sam's being was nearly vibrating with his sorrow. He wanted to say more, but his words were caught inside his chest.

A soft brush along the top of his hand had Sam pulling his gaze up. The love shining out of his brother's eyes was almost worse than condemnation. Bobby and their father had been right…Dean would forgive him anything…including his selfish decision to attend the science fair.

It occurred to him in that moment that the science fair had been that afternoon…he'd missed it. The thing that he'd risked his brother's life for had come and gone without his even realizing it.

"It's okay." Dean's voice was strained with lack of use.

"No it's not…I didn't mean…I'm selfish…and I'm sorry." He pulled in a ragged breath.

"Sammy…where's…dad?" The words were still not coming easily and Sam wondered what exactly the long-term ramifications of both the drug and the cure would be.

"He's with Bobby…they went back to the motel to get some sleep and a shower. Said he'd be back in the morning." Sam shifted on the bed and winced in pain.

The light was starting to filter into the room as the sun rose and Sam was able to see his brother more clearly. He was startled when he noticed a milky film over his brother's normally bright green eyes…and Dean wasn't looking at him.

"Can you turn the light on, Sam? Wanna make sure you're really okay." Dean asked as he shifted and then groaned in pain.

Sam looked around the room and blinked when he saw the lamp in the corner. He carefully rose and limped to the tall light. Something inside him was screaming in denial as he flipped it on.

Dean's head snapped up in surprise when he heard the click of the knob. "Did you turn it on?"

Dread settled inside of Sam. The room was now brightly lit between the light and the sun beginning to slip through the blinds. "Yes."

It was a simple answer, but it brought with it a bone chilling fear as Dean's glazed eyes whirled in rising fear. "Are you sure?" He breathed.

Sam's eyelids dropped closed and his head hung. "Yes."

"Oh god…Sammy…" Dean's voice broke. "I can't see…anything."

And in that sentence he broke Sam's heart.

XXXX

John's stared at the doctor, his anger tripping through him in waves of denial and fear. Dean was blind? How? Why?

The doctor's explanation was a stroke in the ocular nerve. That was the reason for the milky color of his eldest son's eyes. Between the physical therapy that Dean would need for the severed nerves in his arm and the pain of recovering from being held captive by a demon…now Dean was completely blind.

How could they hunt? How could they be 'the Winchesters'?

Bobby had offered his place as a respite while they tried to think of what to do. Something in that damn cure had done this to Dean…and they needed to find that bitch of red-eyed demon so they could fix it.

"Dad?" Sam's small voice cut through his haze of anger. His youngest was scared and he felt responsible. But this decision had been Dean's. He'd chosen to take that cure without knowing the cost…

"Yeah, son?" He answered as he turned and looked at both his boys. Pain flowing through him when he saw Dean's gaze miss his eyes.

"What now?"

Dean remained quiet. But lifted his head as he too wanted to know what the plan was. One thing about their father…he always had a plan.

"I'm going to find that demon…and she's gonna fix this." His voice dropped and it sounded more like a growl. He stepped forward and gently placed his fingers beneath Dena's chin, lifting it up. "I promise you, Dean…we will fix this."

Dean managed a slight nod and let his chin slip off his father's fingers. "Kay…" he whispered.

THE END

Author's Note: So that's the end of the first leg of this journey. Let the sequel begin. That will be titled: "More than Meets the Eye". It will deal specifically with trying to track the demon and find out how to reverse what she did. We'll also see some complications with Sam's own healing and how Dean deals with this newest challenge.

Thanks to everyone that read and reviewed over the course of this story. Thank especially to the following: sbcarri, dandy44, Beakers47, babyreaper, kracken96, Taraneh, BranchSuper, HpDork FreakaZoid, Idreamofivan, ncsupnatfan, mb64, janiekm, Sylvie-winchester, Nina Ferraro, and becca65d.

You guys have been AMAZING at reviewing this story. Thank you.

PLEASE REVIEW: SO I KNOW IF THERE'S INTEREST IN A SEQUEL.