A/N: Getting lots of great feedback/follows/favorites so I'm feeling a push to get more chapters out...even as I feel a bit intimidated by the number of people reading this! Eek.

Warnings- Usual Irene/Kate femslash. A little hetero with John/OC. Enjoy!

The knock came again, more forcefully this time. Irene stood frozen only a moment before jerking to action, loosening Kate's bonds and grabbing for her gun on the bedside table.

"We know you're in there, Miss Adler," an American accented voice floated through the door. "You open this or we break it open."

"Are you ready for your performance?" Irene whispered to Kate.

"Ready as ever, Mistress."

"Good," Irene said, ripping open her dress without a second thought. Kate rolled over and Irene quickly moved to straddle her. She leaned down to begin a passionate kiss, just as there was a loud crack and thump as the door was broken inwards. She heard them pause, watching, momentarily shocked, momentarily interested. She knew the idiots wouldn't have any women or gay men with them, no one who could resist the siren call of hers and Kate's beautiful nude bodies wrapped together in passion.

Just five more seconds of distraction, before she pressed a button on her phone and a small explosive went off, knocking more than one of them off their feet. She pulled the gun up quickly, steadied it and shot at each of them.

"Are they dead?" Kate asked studying their still forms.

"Tranquilized," Irene sighed. "Such a pity they had to interrupt us. We were having such fun. Well, pack up the things darling. We need to move again."

"Yes mistress," Kate said, beginning a process she'd grown used to over the last year she'd spent with Irene. She began working to gather the essentials, knowing full well what Irene would expect brought and what could be left.

"We'll finish up when we move," Irene purred in her ear. "Break in our new bed all right and proper."

Kate smiled at that, in complete agreement. She shut the computer they'd left open to watch the two men. No bother really, nothing too interesting had been happening. Other than complete and total sexual frustration. But they'd look in after a few weeks of hiding out. Likely by then sparks would be beginning to fly.

The bloody phone had been sighing at random intervals for a good two weeks. John wasn't sure how much more he could handle. Hence the reason he was spending a good amount of time at his girlfriend's which she thought was sweet and he thought was convenient. Anything to escape from Sherlock Holmes and his moaning texts.

So therefore he headed off to his new girlfriend's for the night.

He'd asked a friend of his to set him up. Next thing he knew he had Cindi, some accountant who always wore polka dots. Sherlock had seen fit to comment on that right away. Or he'd mumbled some comment neither had caught, but nonetheless managed to seem like some kind of an insult…and probably was knowing Sherlock.

Anyhow, John was excited to spend the night with her. Nothing like being able to get some sexual frustration out. And with an attractive woman not his flatmate—

Cindi was thrilled to welcome him up to her place. She kept giggling about how she'd been worried he hadn't really been keen, considering he'd not spent much time with her in the last week. Well, that was Sherlock's fault with his latest interesting case.

"So," Cindi said, as she leaned back on the couch and batted her eyelashes at him. "We gonna shag or what?"

John smiled and set his wineglass aside. Taking one of her hands and leading her back to the bedroom. Cindi giggled the whole way along, sashaying in ahead of him and beginning to undo her shirt, revealing a polka dot bra underneath. John ignored that in favor of moving forward to begin kissing her. She moaned into his mouth, though he winced at that, reminded of Sherlock's phone briefly.

He tried his best to silence her, snaking his tongue into her mouth and affectively quieting some of the louder noises. His hands reached for the clasp on her bra, undoing it and allowing it to fall to the floor.

There was a sudden beep and John withdrew, pulling his phone out to glance at a text from Sherlock.

Need help with case. –SH

John rolled his eyes and shoved the phone away again. He turned his attention back to Cindi, kissing her, caressing her, enjoying her soft skin and attractive curves. He worked to get his clothes off, reaching for the condom in his pocket.

His phone beeped once or twice more in their progress onto the bed. He glanced at it before he finally surrendered to Cindi's attentions.

John where are you? SH

Boooorrreeed. SH

John tossed the phone away, hoping to not have to deal with more text throughout the day before moving to enjoy the rest of his time with Cindi, unhindered by thoughts of his obnoxious flatmate.

He threw himself into lovemaking. Enjoying Cindi's obvious pleasure, reveling in still being able to declare himself not gay as he made love to a woman. After all, what did Sherlock have that someone like Cindi didn't? She was kind and funny and beautiful. She had the curves, breasts, softness that he liked normally. Sherlock would be all hard muscle and awkward angles and…why the hell did that turn him on?

John tried to regain his focus as he continued in his pursuit, breath coming shorter as he approached his climax. He groaned loudly and finished, pleased when Cindi gave a gasping moan as well. Good, he'd done his job properly then.

He moved off her and collapsed to the side on the bed, panting as he tried to regain his breath. He wondered if she would be alright with him staying the night too so he didn't have to go back to Sherlock. However, when he turned to look at her he found her staring at him.

"What?" he asked. "Something wrong?"

"You're sick you know that," she spat at him. "Get out now!"

"Wait, what? What's wrong?" John sat up.

"Oh my god, you don't even know what you did," she guffawed. "Some boyfriend you are. Can't even moan the right name, you bloody bastard. Get out!"

"Wait, I didn't—" His mind was a bit fuzzy as he tried to think back to what he'd called out. He didn't remember crying anything out. But if he had—

"Cindi I'm so sorry, I only broke up with Sarah a few months ago. I'm probably just not in the habit…I swear if you give me another chance I won't disappoint you again. I didn't mean to I—"

"Who's Sarah?" Cindi demanded, jumping out of bed and grabbing for a robe.

"My ex. I'm sorry if I called her name. I…I've been distracted."

"Obviously," Cindi snapped. "But it wasn't her name out of your mouth either you…you…"

"Wait who did I call then?" John asked, blinking a few times. "Hold on, you're saying it wasn't Sarah either? Whose name came out of my mouth?"

"Sherlock," Cindi snapped. "Now get out. I'm not dating another gay man. I can't do it. Leave."

John's jaw dropped. He sat there a moment, scrambling to try to put the pieces together. Sherlock? He'd called Sherlock? How had that hapepened?

"Gay? Hold on, I'm not gay. I'm just—"

"Confused? Obviously. Get out. I'm not dealing with your sexuality crisis."

John's mouth opened and closed a few times, but he had no words. He stood up and grabbed for his clothes, throwing them on as quickly as possible.

"I'm taking a shower. You'd better be gone by the time I'm out," Cindi said. "And John? Don't call me."

"Wasn't planning on it," John muttered, sure his face was going to permanently red by the time he left. Could anything be more mortifying?

The door to the bathroom closed and he heard the shower start. John finished dressing and headed out. He tried to think about what had happened in the cab ride home, but really there wasn't much he could make about it other than the fact that he was clearly having some kind of sexuality crisis. No other men did this to him. He hadn't been interested in anyone before, even though he'd had more than one man hit on him in his lifetime. But Sherlock…there was just something about Sherlock.

By the time he arrived at 221 B John was thoroughly ready to be done. He didn't want to deal with cases or listen to that bloody phone anymore. He just wanted to find a way to get over the fact that he liked his flatmate, admit it and move on because there was no possibility of anything happening anyways. Or at least he assumed there wasn't. Sherlock had made his lack of interest quite clear.

He arrived upstairs to find Sherlock in the kitchen doing some sort of experiment. John sighed and hoped he wouldn't have a messy cleanup the next morning. Most likely he would though, knowing the detective's lack of concern for making the place clean.

"John, you're back. Was the sex really that bad?" Sherlock said.

John felt his face heating again. "You texted me. What do you need?"

"Hmm, oh I figured it out ages ago. Just thought I could get you back if I promised a good case."

"Bastard," John muttered.

"How is Sarah?" Sherlock asked.

"It was Cindi and we've broken things off."

"Oh, probably for the best. She has another boyfriend anyhow," Sherlock said.

John rolled his eyes. "I'm going to bed."

"Hmm, bed? Why?"

"Because I'm tired and it's after midnight, and I don't have the energy to put up with you," John growled.

Sherlock didn't respond.

An orgasmic sigh rang out through the apartment. John gritted his teeth and walked back towards the stairs, not eager to hear any more after the horrible and embarrassing breakup. He just needed to sleep, forget. Hopefully by tomorrow everything would be better.

"Time for our next move," Irene said, licking her lips. She glanced at her phone.

Let's have dinner.

No answer, as always, but still, she liked watching his face when he read her words. No real interest there of course, but by tomorrow he'd change his mind.

"Next move?" Kate asked, glancing between her and the screen. This was one of their first sessions watching again since they'd settled in the cottage in the country. They'd left a nice dead end trail elsewhere, so they had hopes their enemies would leave them alone, at least for a while.

"Yes, you'll see. Sherlock really does underestimate me. Tomorrow will be so much more fun. Just you watch. Tomorrow, he's going to finally start paying attention to my messages."

Kate cocked her head but didn't question. She was aware that Irene wanted to surprise all of them. And it was more than likely that she would.

"If you can make him respond to your messages, I'll do that thing I did in Rome," Kate whispered.

"Darling, you'll do that thing you did in Rome if I order to and you know it, but I'll accept that bet. Best get yourself nice and ready then. I guarantee, tomorrow I'll have my first text from Sherlock Holmes."

Irene smiled, eyes lighting at the thought. She knew how to get what she wanted. Sherlock Holmes would come when she called.

A/N: For anyone wondering Cindi was my interpretation of "the one with the spots" Sherlock lists when trying to figure out who is John's latest girlfriend. Thought that would be fun.

If you're expecting a quick entry into Johnlock…it should be obvious by now I'm going to draw it out a bit like Irene will. I almost jumped a significant amount, but looked through timelines and figured out the Woman case takes place in September so there's a long chunk before Irene is pronounced "dead" on Christmas eve. Obviously this won't all be canon, but I'm going to stick with some of the basics in that.

Thanks to S.B.N.O. for reviewing. Please read and review.