Disclaimer: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and all related characters belong to Nickelodeon.

Summary: The Madness of the Symbol has struck again, affecting one turtle in such a way that he is trapped and cut off from everyone and everything he loves. How do you cope when no one even knows you are lost? NOT a death fic! Thoughts, comments and concrit welcomed.

Creepy but gorgeous cover created by the awesome Sampsonknight over on Deviant Art. FFNet has wiped out all links to DA on my profile... ugh...

Anon Review Responses:

GuestGirl: Thanks! I hope you continue to enjoy XD

Guest from Oct 3rd: Thank you :-) Yeah, Mikey needed that Astral Plain scene just to keep going and yet, having it taken away again after... I'm sure though that he'd rather have had that much than nothing at all :-s There's some brotherly interaction in this chapter and definitely some to come in future chapters XD You're welcome and don't worry! This story needs to be updated fairly quickly as it needs to all be up by the end of this month! (deadlines, who needs 'em, haha). Good to know :-)

Guest from Oct 4th: Yeah... Doppelmike is just as much a victim as Mikey, just in other ways. There will definitely be another Astral Plain scene coming up but not for a few chapters yet! Heh! Mikey is nothing if not knowledgeable about his family XD

Thanks to everyone who has commented, faved and followed. Seeing those message comes in really makes my day :-)

Snatched

Ch 4

'Have you calmed down yet?' Doppelmike's mental voice floated down into the utter darkness of Mikey's world, 'or do I need to keep you completely buried for a few hours longer?'

His emotions ragged and mind frantic, Mikey mentally swallowed and shakily called back, Get me out of here, please...

Suddenly sight and sound overwhelmed the bodiless ninja as Doppelmike pulled him out of the pit he'd been shunted into and allowed him to experience what was happening around them once more.

You... promised not to do that to me again... Mikey accused tremulously. I can't... I need...

'You left me no choice! I couldn't concentrate on anything with your non-stop screaming overwhelming my mind!' Doppelmike snapped. 'Besides, I never actually promised, I only said I wouldn't as long as you behaved.'

Mikey didn't respond, just tried to even his 'breathing'.

Doppelmike eventually sighed. 'Look, we're having a movie night and apparently it's my turn to pick the movie.'

Cool, Mikey muttered, not really giving a damn; he just wanted his life back.

'I've probably seen everything over the course of my lives so I'm not really interested Mikey, so I'll let you choose to make up for shutting you away the way I was forced to.'

'Like picking some stupid movie makes up for hours of nothingness,' Mikey thought petulantly as he shuddered. Okay, he finally answered with a distinct lack of enthusiasm.

'Well?' Doppelmike pressed after a number of silent seconds. 'Everyone's waiting.'

Mikey shrugged inwardly, not really caring right now. I dunno, 'Plan 9 From Outer Space' or 'Snakes on a Plane' are both good choices. One's a classic and the other'll make Leo squirm. Could always chose 'The Space Turtle Who Ate Tokyo' too, it's a good b-grade monster flick and Donnie's a closet fan. So yeah, whichever.

The choice was met by good natured groans from his brothers but everyone soon settled in with popcorn and drinks. Mikey found he had to remind Doppelmike that since he was pretending to be him, he had to act like he was enjoying the movie. For his part though, Mikey couldn't stay focused on it and didn't really want to watch anyway. He was far more focused on the earlier events of the day.

Both how much he enjoyed actually being able to spend time with his brothers and father and them actually seeing him, along with how much it had hurt having it all torn away again with no one the wiser. The kicker had been that he'd somehow repaired the rift that had grown between himself, or rather Doppelmike, and Raph. As he half heartedly watched the movie through Doppelmike's eyes, his thoughts began to wander.

Doppelmike had previously told Mikey that he'd spared him because Mikey had fought hard against his takeover, something that Mikey himself had no recollection of, and because Doppelmike had wanted someone to talk to who he could be himself with. For the last two weeks though, Doppelmike hadn't really told him very much at all so that somehow didn't seem right. Mikey knew he kept making things difficult for the body snatcher, yet Doppelmike had only retaliated twice, leaving Mikey to start wondering if shutting him out so completely actually took a lot of effort on Doppelmike's part. Maybe too much effort, despite his multitude of lifetimes' experience.

All that got Mikey to thinking about the Astral Plain. It was a realm of mind and thought and while definitely not Mikey's forte, that didn't mean he was incapable. Thinking of realms of mind and thought, Mikey knew that was basically where he was trapped right now; imprisoned in the back of someone else's mind but still a mental realm none-the-less.

'That was the worst movie I have ever seen!' Doppelmike told Mikey. He stood from the couch to put away the movie whose credits had begun to roll.

I know dude, it's a classic, Mikey replied distantly, too caught up in the flow of his thoughts to pay much attention.

'Did you choose that pile of dredge to punish me?'

Mikey chuckled, Nuh, my bros know my love of B-grade horror and the more B-grade, the better!

'You have serious issues,' Doppelmike accused before cheerfully calling out to Mikey's siblings, "Night bros!"

"Night Mikey!"

Can't say I'm the only one, Doppel, Mikey replied with a non-existent shrug.

'I'm going to have my work cut out for me in this world, that's for sure.'

What do you mean? Mikey asked, his suspicions suddenly rising.

'If I want to change their perception of me so I can act more naturally to myself, I'm going to have to take my time and do it slowly,' Doppelmike admitted.

Mikey froze, And what does that mean?

'Phase out the useless rubbish like those worthless comics, your 'toys'...'

Action figures! Mikey corrected indignantly, interrupting as his fear rose.

'...those tasteless movies and increase of focus and training. That's my goal. Then I can work to take down Shredder in this world and hopefully this time, it'll be the right one,' Doppelmike explained nonchalantly.

You want to destroy what's left of me? Mikey asked in mounting horror.

'It's my life now, remember?' Doppelmike callously reminded.

You can't! What'll I do? Mikey cried out desperately. Everything else had already been taken from him, his body, his life, his family, his friends and now Doppelmike was promising to take the last remainders too.

'Just put up with it when the time comes or consign yourself to oblivion like every other Mikey has.'

But...

'But nothing, Michelangelo. My life!'

Mikey glowered wordlessly ahead at the only thing he could, at whatever it was Doppelmike was looking at but he imagined the body snatcher in front of him where he could be on the receiving end of his deadly glare.

'Good night.'

Something that had been said suddenly occurred to Mikey and he called out, Doppelmike, wait! I want to ask something!

'What?'

What did you mean by 'find the right Shredder'? Mikey asked curiously. Don't you need to go back to your own dimension for that? And how would you even manage that considering you're dead there?

'No, the Shredder who murdered my family was not native to our world and I found out just before he killed me that he was moving from dimension to dimension, killing us off in one world after another,' Doppelmike explained morosely. 'After he delivered the final blow to me, he moved on to the next dimension to begin the hunt anew there. So that's what I'm doing, going from dimension to dimension, trying to find him and taking out any other Shredder in the process. Even if he is not the one from the dimension I'm in at the time, he might pass through later. Though my hope is that I'll find him before it all began and kill him; stop him from starting all this in the first place...'

Mikey was quiet for a moment, letting his new found understanding sink in. Wow, that's pretty sucktastic but that still doesn't explain why you've taken it so personally that you're willing to steal other lives for your revenge. I mean, you know Shredder is pretty twisted to begin with, right?

'When he first arrived in my original world, he claimed to be different... He even saved my life but it turned out that was just a trick to get to my family and I stupidly trusted him...'

You trusted a Shredder? Mikey asked incredulously. No matter what happened, he couldn't imagine ever doing the same, not even if Shredder fell in love with him and saved the lives of everyone he cared about; he shuddered at the terrifying thought. After all, the walking kitchen appliance had proved too many times how treacherous he could be.

Doppelmike scowled, Mikey could tell by the slightly diminished view through the body snatcher's eyes. 'He made a compelling case and I was far too naïve and trusting back then. Raph always told me my trusting nature would come back to burn me one day and he was right...'

Sorry but I gotta repeat this to make sure I really understand and because I'm not completely sure I even heard you right, Mikey stated incredulously. You trusted a Shredder? No wonder you're so messed up!

'Watch your tone with me or I'll lock you away in the dark again!' Doppelmike threatened angrily.

'Any other time and he probably would have already, without the warning,' Mikey realised with amazement. 'I must have been right. Keeping me down in the nothingness like that must take too much concentration or energy or something.'

Sorry, I didn't mean to upset you, Mikey apologised as sincerely as he was capable of doing. Welp! I know you've gotta be tired from all of today's excitement so I'll just let you sleep now, okay?

'Thanks,' Doppelmike replied suspicion filling his mental voice.

Hey! Don't forget the radio!

-:-

Once Doppelmike was finally asleep, Mikey returned to his earlier musing. If where he was was just another part of the mind, then perhaps like with the Astral Plain, he could learn to influence it.

Mikey took the mental equivalent of a deep breath and settled down to focus on trying to remember every lesson in meditation and the Astral Plain he'd suffered through under Splinter's tutelage. He wished that he'd been able to pay more attention in the past but it was all so boring, just sitting there trying to still his thoughts and concentrate on both his breathing and nothing. The slightest sound or itch had always distracted him and upon thinking about that, maybe he shouldn't have reminded Doppelmike about the ever important radio but then again, he was sure the music and talk from the station playing were all that kept him sane through the long, boring and lonely hours of his nights. Still, there was nothing else to distract him at least.

Over the course of the night, Mikey managed to focus himself and really connect with his dark, colourless environment. Once he finally felt a solid connection, he concentrated on himself all the more. He needed some sort of physical form, even if it was only a figment of his imagination within this bleak, featureless mindscape.

When he opened his eyes at the sound of his alarm ringing out, Mikey smiled. He felt better than he had in ages, more whole, and he looked down.

Actually managed to look down to see the ghostly form of his left hand, sans symbol, and he laughed in joy before relaxing his concentration. The hand immediately disappeared from view but as Mikey responded to Doppelmike's 'Good morning,' he just didn't care.

He now knew he could do it with some practise but he definitely wasn't ready to let Doppelmike know about his new little secret.

-:-

Throughout the training session that morning, Mikey didn't bother with paying attention for once. He shirked his necessary job of distracting Doppelmike; the one that helped maintain the facade that Doppelmike was who he pretended to be. Instead, Mikey worked on practising his new found ability since Doppelmike was far too preoccupied with training to notice what Mikey was actually up to. Finally as the ninjutsu lesson for the day came to a close, Splinter called out to Doppelmike and Mikey snapped to attention, focusing back on the world he no longer had any part of.

"You did exceptionally well today, my son," the rat commended in a pleased tone. "I see you really were serious in your request during yesterday's meditation."

"Yes Master Splinter, I was," Doppelmike bowed in respect as he answered.

"If you are able to keep up the good work in both your meditation as well as your training, I will certainly be more amenable to your request," Splinter said as he smiled warmly at Doppelmike.

"Thank you, Sensei." Doppelmike forced a smile but inside, he was fuming. 'I meant to speak to you about that once we were alone Michelangelo but I forgot due to your... breakdown.'

Sorry dude but it's going to happen again sooner or later anyway and besides, it worked, right? Mikey quickly soothed. I was able to convince my bros and Master Splinter that everything was normal so I didn't break my word or anything, Doppeldude.

'I suppose...'

After Splinter dismissed him, Doppelmike walked out of the dojo, passing the sniggering Raph who was talking with Leo and Donnie. Mikey managed to catch enough of the words to realise what they were talking about and he perked up in delight at the opportunity presented him.

Doppel! Go up to my bros!

'Why?' Doppelmike asked suspiciously at the sudden excitement.

Heh! They're making bets on how long you can actually manage to 'keep up the good work', Mikey chortled eagerly. You should get in on the action too! You could really clean up!

Doppelmike bounded up to the other three turtles, grinning broadly, "I hear you dudes are betting on me!"

"Uh... us?" Leo asked innocently. "Of course not!"

Doppelmike sidled towards Donnie at Mikey's suggestion, "Come on bro, lemme in on the action!"

"Mikey, really! We'd never do such a thing!" Donnie stammered his innocence.

"Right bro," Doppelmike winked. "Of course you wouldn't. Seriously though, how long are you guys giving me?"

Leonardo sighed unenthusiastically, "All right... I know I'm being overly generous but I am betting on you being able to stay focused for at least five days."

Raph smirked in amusement, "And that just goes to show how much of an idiot Leo is! I don't even give you until the end of tomorrow."

"Wow dude, that's harsh!" Doppelmike said, holding his hand over his heart and adding a slightly hurt affectation to his tone. He turned to face Donnie, "And you bro? Just how little do you really think of me?"

Donnie at least had the good grace to look embarrassed as he rubbed the back of his head. "Personally I believe Raph is correct but I do know when you really want something, you can focus on working for it so I give you four days."

Tell them you can keep up the focus for a week! Mikey immediately chimed in.

'Unlike you, I can focus a lot longer than that!' Doppelmike responded indignantly.

Yeah I get that dude but you've had dozens of stolen lives to learn! They think you're me! Mikey reminded him. More than a week is completely unrealistic. Shell! I could probably only manage a few days if I really tried and even that would just about kill me! Mikey cried melodramatically as he continued, wishing he could wave his arms around for effect.

Doppelmike grinned brightly, "Bet you I can manage to stay focused during training for a whole week!"

Leonardo, Raphael and Donatello cracked up, doubling over with derisive laughter.

Wow, it's not quite that funny... Mikey muttered, crushed by the intensity of their response.

"Not a chance, bro!"

"I always knew you were delusional, Mikey!"

"All right then. If you're so sure, usual stakes. Winner doesn't do chores for a month and if someone gets the exact time right, then during that month, the rest of us take it in turns to be at their beck and call for one day each per week!" Leo grinned, wiping away tears of laughter. "Okay, let's get cleaning the dojo over and done with so we can go eat."

'Definitely in the bag! Thanks, Mikey,' Doppelmike smiled appreciatively.

Heh! No problem, Doppel! But you know, I came up with an awesome idea, dude! Mikey ventured since Doppelmike seemed to be in a good mood.

'Do tell.'

Well, you know how yesterday you were able to let me have enough control to go to the Astral Plain in place of you? Mikey asked eagerly.

'Yes...' Doppelmike responded as he took a broom from Leo. He already didn't like where this seemed to be going.

Well, Mikey drew the word out before continuing in a hurry, that just proves that it's possible so how about we time share?

'No!'

Wait, just hear me out, okay? Mikey pushed desperately, needing Doppelmike to see reason.

'I already said no!'

But it would help us both! Mikey insisted. He tried not to whine, knowing it wouldn't get him anywhere in this case.

'That's just your desperation showing,' Doppelmike responded, dismissing him out of hand as he began to sweep the dojo.

No, it's really not, though I can't deny I am pretty desperate. But that's why I want you to listen!

Doppelmike sighed, wishing that Mikey would just drop the subject already but he knew that would never happen so easily. 'Alright go ahead and humour me. Tell me your 'reasons' how you think time sharing could possibly help me!'

Mikey perked up, happy that the thief was at least going to hear him out. Because you wouldn't have to hide any more! Mikey pointed out in a rush. If we were to actually share my body, I'd be perfectly fine telling my bros and Master Splinter most of the truth, the parts that don't make you look bad, and make it obvious that I don't mind the arrangement and then you could actually just be yourself and no one would mind! It's perfect and that way we would both win!

'That's not really a bad thought,' Doppelmike acknowledged reluctantly, 'but...'

Mikey's heart sank; Doppelmike was never going to agree, no matter how much of a compelling argument he put up. The other-dimensional body snatcher had lost so much early on that he'd never be willing to give up any control, no matter how sincere and willing Mikey actually was.

'...here's the problem that I see, Mikey,' Doppelmike paused then spat, 'I don't trust you that much! After all, I get how much you must hate me for what I've done to you.'

Mikey tried to protest but was spoken over as Doppelmike continued speaking.

'You'd probably do just about anything to get rid of me as soon as you found the slightest opportunity and even though that's not actually possible, I will not give you the chance to even try!'

Come on, Doppeldude, you're being ridiculous! Mikey protested. Okay, I admit, I really don't like you very much, you could even say I despise you for doing this to me but I don't hate you!

Doppelmike laughed nastily, 'As if I would ever believe you! If I was in your place, I'd hate me!'

And there's the problem, like I've said so many times before, you are not me! You haven't been me for a long time, dude, Mikey exclaimed, trying to get his point across. You've changed over the what, centuries? Millennia? You've become bitter, twisted and basically unrecognisable! Okay, from what little you've bothered to tell me, I know you had reason to be hurt and want revenge but you've let your hatred consume you!

'And I told you weeks ago that you would likely have done the same in my place.'

Mikey shook his head, No, I wouldn't have. Hate really isn't in my nature. It takes up way too much time and energy. Time and energy that is far better spent on enjoying life. I've never hated and that's a big part of why I've always had so much energy.

Doppelmike snorted disdainfully and Leo called out from where he was mopping over where Doppelmike had already swept, "Are you alright, Mikey?"

"Yeah, I'm fine bro! I just thought of something too stupid and annoying even for me!" Doppelmike called back, managing to include a not-so-subtle dig at Mikey.

Mikey huffed at the dismissal.

"Uh huh." Leo hefted the bucket and looked around, "Well, I think we're pretty much done here anyway."

"Good," Raph stated, straightening up as he put the last piece of equipment away, "I'm starvin'! We got any leftovers from last night's dinner?"

"Nope," Doppelmike replied. "I'll just make some quick and easy grilled cheese sandwiches if everyone's cool with that?"

"That sounds good," Donnie smiled. "How about you go get started with that and we'll put the cleaning equipment away."

"Thanks." Doppelmike smiled outwardly as he left, heading towards the kitchen. Inwardly however, he sneered at Mikey, 'What do you think actually happens to me once I take down the Shredder and Foot of each world?'

Mikey stared ahead, a sick feeling coursing through him. He hadn't thought about that before but now that the question was asked, he knew he didn't like wherever Doppelmike was leading. Um, you're happy to have taken out a major threat but disappointed it wasn't the right one so you move right on to the next world?

Doppelmike laughed mockingly at Mikey's expense, 'I have no control over moving on or which dimension I end up in. I'm here until my inhabited body dies and only then doI get to move on! It gives me time to become better, to train my skills more, even if I still have to start over again on training the next body itself. It's all part of the price of my curse!' he spat as he turned on the grill and started making the sandwiches.

Mikey stayed quiet for several minutes before asking, But if you could leave sooner, would you?

'If I had that kind of control, sure but then again, doing so would only hurt those left behind because I would be leaving behind an empty shell of a body.'

I get it, because you've murdered the other Mikeys but this time, I'm still here... Mikey watched numbly as Doppelmike took out plates and his brothers started filing into the kitchen.

'And it makes no difference whatsoever, because I'll be here regardless until this body dies and when it does, I'll simply move on to the next world, the next body, while you remain here to die with it.' Doppelmike pulled the first of the ready sandwiches from the grill and placed it on a plate. He quickly handed it to Leo to go take to their sensei.

'Face it Mikey, your situation is hopeless and the sooner you accept this, the happier you will be.'

-:-

to be continued