A/N: Sorry this took a little longer to publish than usual, but it is a longer chapter. Hope you enjoy :)
Cosima returned to her hotel room in a frantic state. The room was a mess and she was nervously anticipating whatever Delphine had to tell her. She was so shocked to see the woman initially that she couldn't think straight. She also managed to forget that she'd had someone in her room the night before and became wracked with guilt. She knew she'd technically done nothing wrong, but seeing Delphine's innocent smile made her unsettled. She decided to take another shower in order to clear her head. As she stood in the shower attempting to cleanse herself, she began to ponder the current events.
She couldn't help but wonder if she'd come all of this way to tell her she was single. Even if she were single, did that mean she herself was ready? Was she really willing to open herself up to the possibility that Delphine was more than just a woman she was infatuated with because she wasn't available? Was she ready to allow herself to be open to someone fully and let her feelings take control of her actions? There were so many things to consider with Delphine that she'd never had to with anyone else. After pacing her room with uncertainty, she resolved to stop wondering and find out. She then thought it'd smart to consult her brother, as she did on these matters.
"Hey there Superstar! You were amazing today!" Felix answered, in excitement.
"Thanks Fe! My heart was in my throat when I thought they would tie it."
"Mine too…I knew you'd pull it out though Sis... Mum would've been proud." His sincerity was evident and it was just the thing Cosima needed to hear at the moment. She reveled in the peace it brought her before she remembered why she'd called.
"So uh, there's something else…guess who's here?" She led with a question not sure how he would receive this information.
"Oh please tell me it's not that God-awful Slag…" He questioned, with words laced with disdain.
She laughed before answering, "Not unless you think Delphine fits that description, and you'd better not."
"Oh no way? Frenchie hopped a flight to the Great White North just to see you? This is big Cos…She means business." He was intrigued by this information and wanted every detail but before he could gather any, she busted his bubble.
"Well I haven't had a chance to ask her anything. She surprised me…She was waiting with the fans by the bus." She smiled at the memory of the blonde standing in the crowd, with her smile and hair blowing in the wind. I was like a scene in a romantic comedy.
"Cosima I love you, but I hate that these types of things happen to you instead of me. I want to be in a romance novel too." He pouted; truly jealous of his sister's thrilling new love life.
"Don't' be…I'm not even sure what she wants. I'm just as oblivious as you." She admitted while picking out a more formal outfit than she usually wore.
"No Dear, the only one oblivious is you. I know that she wants you! She came all the way there to show you so get a clue and make me proud."
"Well I'll believe it when I see it. I've been wrong before…" There was a hint of bitterness in her tone before she continued. "If she does truly want me, I'm going to try my best not to let my weariness with her wavering ruin the evening."
"That's the spirit Kiddo! Shag her brains out!" He shouted, before laughing uncontrollably at his sister's stunned silence.
Eventually Cosima laughed before scolding her brother for referring to Delphine in that manner. After he reluctantly apologized, she decided to come clean about Shay.
"So one more quick thing…totally not important but um…I brought someone home last night."
There was a deep sigh from her brother before he began his reply.
"Oh…well Sis you aren't her girlfriend and she did lead you on, so I'm not surprised you'd want to dust the cobwebs off. How long had it been? A week?" He teased without judgement, knowing all too well about his sisters knack for using affection from women to build up her self-confidence.
She wanted to be offended but he had a point. Although she hadn't gone through with it, she'd had every intention to at first. She laughed off his thinly veiled insult before responding.
"Screw you Punk! It's been two weeks and I didn't go through with it. I was just trying to get my mind off of Delphine, but she was all I could think about…" She admitted this before realizing what she was saying. She truly couldn't get her mind off of the woman and it was affecting her in more ways than she'd have preferred.
"Oh well shit…this is serious. You'd better figure out what she wants then because it's obvious that you want her exclusively."
She considered his suggestion and knew he was right. She wanted Delphine to a fault and her actions were speaking far louder than her dismissive words.
"I know…I guess this is what normal people feel when they meet someone they really like. I always thought the whole infatuation thing was total bullshit."
"Well your behavior would tend to support the theory but I am as happy for you as I am skeptical. Just take care of yourself Sis…"
"I will…thanks" She replied with an uncertain tone before hanging up to get ready.
After several minutes of searching through her limited options, she decided to wear a pair of tight black tuxedo pants and a fitted white button down. She rolled up the sleeves and put on a Movado from the collection that the company paid her to wear. She added a pair of flat ankle boots and her dreads were hanging loosely from a bun. She looked very well put together and decided contacts would suit her outfit better than her glasses. Once she was dressed, she sprayed herself with cologne and applied her eyeliner in the mirror awaiting Delphine's call.
…
Although Delphine had planned on going straight to meet Cosima from the match, she realized her hotel was on the way. She stopped by her room to freshen up and change into her newly purchased black and white strapless dress. The dress was essentially a party dress and she knew it would make people take notice. She wanted Cosima to know she was dressing for her and wanted to look good by her side. She then chose the highest heels she owned and wore her latest white gold jewelry set. While touching up her hair, she let her curls hang loosely around her face. Her make-up was smoky and seductive and her perfume was light and airy. It was apparent she was trying to get Cosima's undivided attention and she felt this outfit would certainly do the trick.
Once she was finally ready, she went for a smoke while awaiting a cab. While she anticipating her evening, she decided to look up headlines from the match. She wanted to know what all of the wonderful things Cosima was doing on the field were called. Aside from Aldous' brief overview, she really knew nothing about the sport. As she browsed, she stumbled upon a photo of Cosima with two women in bikinis. The photo was attached to an article about the most eligible women in sports. She wanted to just ignore it until she realized the photo was time stamped. The picture was uploaded to Instagram on Thursday afternoon; the day Cosima said she'd spent with her family. At first she was hurt because Cosima had lied but that hurt quickly turned into jealousy. She had attempted to remind herself that Cosima was not her girlfriend and had no obligation to tell her the truth, but she was upset nonetheless. Once the cab arrived, she got in and told herself it was just a silly article, even though it obviously had bothered her.
…..
I'm here, should I wait in the bar?
C: Yeah I'll be down in 10.
D: D'accord.
Cosima was surprised at how short Delphine was being but chose not to dwell. Once she entered the elevator, her heart began to race and her palms became clammy. She knew in her mind that Delphine was the only person she'd known to cause such a reaction in her. She entered the room and saw the blonde sitting at the bar having a lively conversation with the bartender. She was slightly jealous of how close he was to her and it prompted her to make haste entering the bar.
Once she was close, she gave the bartender an eyebrow raise and placed a hand on Delphine's shoulder to get her attention. As the woman turned to acknowledge her, Cosima felt butterflies and began to smile uncontrollably.
"Hey Gorgeous…" She whispered, with a wink.
"Allo Cosima…" was all Delphine could say in response after seeing how good she looked in her dressy attire. Her features began to soften as she stood looking down at Cosima with a dream-like awe. She couldn't help but notice Cosima's outfit was very fitting and showcased just how sexy she looked in menswear.
Cosima had a reaction to seeing the blonde stand several inches taller than herself. In the tight curve hugging dress, Delphine looked like a piece of artwork as she stood still with her hazel eyes locked onto Cosima.
Finally, after ogling, Cosima reached out to hug the woman and they embraced briefly before sitting rather close to one another at the bar.
"I'm so happy you're here Delphine, I should've told you that earlier. I guess I was just in shock." Cosima was flushed and had a shy, reserved quality about her that Delphine wasn't familiar with.
"Bon, je suis content que vous avez accepté de me voir, I was worried you were still upset with me." The blonde confessed, knowing Cosima probably needed time to process what her visit meant.
Refusing to acknowledge the mention of their last date, she continued their conversation.
"So you look unbelievable…but I'm assuming you didn't have that outfit stuffed in your purse?" Cosima admitted as she let her gaze roam slowly down Delphine's body. She was so roused by where her mind was roaming. So much so, that she shifted in her seat, feeling herself begin to react.
"Non, my hotel was on the way so I changed. You look very…stylish in the menswear by the way. It's a good look for you." Delphine flirted with a wink as she took a sip of her Kir Royale.
Cosima just gave a cocky grin and ordered herself a scotch. She was trying to hold off on the questions and let Delphine explain herself on her own but she was eager to know. Just when Delphine began to speak, a woman walked up behind Cosima and interrupted her.
"Hi…I'm so sorry but I came all the way from New York to watch you play today…You were amazing…I'm a big fan." The young brunette gushed as she invaded Cosima's personal space.
"Thank you for your support. It's nice to meet you." She replied happily enough, even though she wanted nothing more than to send her away. This was her time to spend with Delphine and this stranger was wasting it.
"Yeah me too, I'm Gracie by the way…If it's not too much to ask… can I get a picture with you?" The woman asked hopefully, noticing Delphine's intense look from behind them but choosing to ignore it.
"Uh yeah sure…" Cosima went to put her arm around the woman's shoulder before she was ambushed with a kiss on the cheek and the picture was snapped. In complete shock, Cosima sat with her mouth agape not knowing how to respond. Delphine rolled her eyes and faced the bar before ordering another drink.
The woman thanked Cosima profusely and scurried off to return to her friends. Cosima just nodded with a straight face and turned back to face Delphine.
"I'm sorry about that, what were you saying?" She completely brushed off the incident as if it were normal. Delphine began to realize that maybe it was normal and considered how she would be able to deal with that type of interaction with fans.
"Oui, as I was saying, I came here to see you play… I was so happy when you scored. You're so talented." Delphine gushed, with a sweet admiration for Cosima's talent.
"Oh stop…no go on…" She teased as she feigned modesty. "Thank you though, really. That means so much coming from you…I have to ask though, did you come all of this way just to watch me play?" Cosima felt she knew that wasn't the case but asked in order to move the conversation along.
"Non, of course not." Delphine paused to gather her thoughts. She wanted to make sure she delivered this well. "I came to tell you…to show you that I'm invested. I'm invested in taking a chance with you." She retorted, while grabbing Cosima's right hand and holding it to emphasize her seriousness.
Cosima heard Delphine' words and began to oscillate between feelings of overwhelming joy and paralyzing fear. She wanted Delphine terribly but she was afraid to scare the woman away. This was a big deal and just because Delphine thought she was ready didn't mean there weren't still potential obstacles to overcome.
She decided to ask the key question in order to determine whether or not she should truly take Delphine at her word.
"So you and your boyfriend are…?" Cosima asked as she looked toward their joined hands momentarily while brushing a thumb over Delphine's knuckles.
"Fini…He has already begun moving out." Delphine answered, clearly ecstatic to share the news. She tightened her grip on Cosima's hand and pulled her in slightly.
"So you're single now? Have you had any time to really think about what it would mean to be with me? I mean really think about it? I don't want you to rush into this." Cosima made it clear she did not want any spur of the moment antics from Delphine, no matter how much she wanted her.
"It was a long time coming…ending things with Olivier and as far as you and I go…I don't need to think about it. I know what I feel. I just need you to promise to always be honest with me." Delphine countered, obviously still not over seeing that article. The fan they'd just encountered only making her feel worse. She'd just ended a toxic relationship and she was afraid her strong feelings for Cosima could cloud her judgement. She looked into her eyes as she awaited confirmation.
"Yeah, of course Delphine. I would never lie to you…" Cosima answered with certainty before licking her lips. She was looking back into Delphine's eyes searching for proof that she was real and that this was really happening. It felt like a dream.
On the other hand, Delphine didn't find the comfort she was looking for in Cosima's gaze and took the dreamy look on Cosima's face as a rouse. She then essentially became insecure and gave a look that said "sure you won't" before turning to sip her drink. She didn't want to start an argument but after she just saw how Cosima allowed that woman to kiss her while she was sitting there, she was curious what types of things happened when she wasn't around. She noticed Cosima's focus on her appearance and wondered if the sexy look had backfired. Was Cosima able to focus on their connection without thinking exclusively about sex? It was obvious that between getting minimal rest, being drunk all day, and being relentlessly pursued by Aldous, Delphine was becoming less and less like herself.
Cosima noticed the look and the brush off and took offense to it.
"Hey…what was that look for? I mean what I said Delphine." She attempted to ask as calmly as possible. Her scotch was beginning to get to her and she knew she was far too tired for any dramatics.
"Starting now?" Delphine taunted, letting the jealousy get the better of her.
"Okay you've got me…what is this about? We were really getting somewhere but I feel like you're trying to ruin it." Although her words were harsh, Cosima placed her hand on Delphine's thigh to try and comfort her. She was certain this couldn't have anything to do with Shay, or at least she'd hoped.
"It's nothing…really. I just wished you told me you went to the beach Thursday instead of saying you were with your family. I didn't even ask where you'd been and you lied to me willingly." Delphine retorted, as she shifted in the stool avoiding looking at the brunette.
Cosima's eyes grew wide as her face contorted into a frown. She looked at the blonde in disbelief and began her response. "I did go to the beach... with my niece and sister. I'm not sure what this is about but I did not lie to you. I had no reason to, we weren't…aren't in a relationship Delphine." Cosima removed her hand and turned to face the bar. She ordered a double to replace the drink she'd finished and shook her head. Although relieved her secret wasn't out, she was still annoyed by Delphine's assumptions.
"Ok so you took time away from your family to take photos with groupies, non? That's even worse!" Delphine remarked with a renewed anger.
Cosima began to realize what Delphine was referring to and laughed to herself. She knew those girls were just fans of the team and saw them as harmless. She was honestly more concerned with how Delphine ever found out about it in the first place. In addition, if she's reacting this poorly to a photo, what would've happened if she had found out about Shay? Would she believe her when she told her she couldn't go through with it? Despite her questioning, she resolved that now wasn't the time to bring it up.
"Oh my God Delphine, that's what you're upset about? The picture I took with some teenagers?" She took a deep breath and chose her next words carefully. "Since you're so curious, I went to the pier to get my niece an ice cream and they stopped me. They asked for a picture and I took one. It was completely harmless. Honestly, I can't believe you're acting like this when you've had a boyfriend the entire time I've known you. At least I wasn't sharing a bed with them!" Cosima was exasperated and wasn't hiding it. She wanted to get up and leave but she couldn't pull herself away from the blonde. It was a level of attraction that she couldn't fight.
"So you say…And Olivier and I haven't been intimate in over a month if that's what you're implying." Delphine was pushing every boundary possible by bringing this up and she wasn't sure why.
"Okay, I think I've had enough of this for tonight. This is pointless, you don't want to get along. That's obvious to me now. I can't believe you came all this way to fight with me over something so trivial." Cosima all but shouted before slamming cash on the bar and beginning to walk toward the entrance of the hotel. Delphine was shocked and got up to follow her.
Delphine called after Cosima who ignored her until she stopped at the valet stand, not sure where she was planning to flee to. Instead of proceeding to roam the streets, she turned to face Delphine defensively.
"What Delphine? You want to accuse me of something else I didn't do? Or do you want to be jealous over something you have no right to be?" The brunette snapped before noticing all eyes were on them. She grabbed Delphine's hand and led them to a secluded area at the side of the hotel. Cosima then proceeded to let go of her hand and leaned her back against the wall. She donned a miserable look before Delphine began to speak.
"What's wrong? Are you okay?" Delphine asked as she cupped Cosima's face in her hands. She was worried about the look Cosima was giving her and she was upset with herself for causing this commotion. She knew it was stupid to bring the photo up, especially when she knew how Cosima felt about her. It was so obvious that the woman adored her and she kept letting her insecurities creep up and ruin their moments of serenity. She felt horrible and vowed to herself not to fuck it up beyond repair.
Cosima attempted to free herself from Delphine's hold but gave up and looked off into the distance past the woman once she realized it was pointless. She had all these feelings built up over the last few days and was so afraid at how quickly she'd developed them. She wasn't supposed to feel this way about anyone, least of all someone she'd just met. It was all very unbelievable and she gathered her thoughts to lay it on the line with Delphine, once and for all.
She began to answer the question at hand;
"You! You're what's wrong Delphine… It hurts so much to not be able to be close to you. You're in every part of me... I think about you all day; the way you laugh with your whole body, the way you bite your lip when you're nervous, and the look you give me when we're this close to one another that tells me you feel this too. Every time I think we are getting somewhere, we go backward and part of me wants to fight for this but another wants to leave before it destroys me…When I consider how much pain I feel now I don't know if I can take much more." Cosima fought back tears before removing Delphine's hands from her face. She held them in her hands before pleading.
Delphine stood frozen, not knowing how to respond.
"Please…say something Delphine…this is your decision, I've made mine."
Delphine considered Cosima's words and began to feel an overwhelming sense of regret. She wasn't sure what came over her but her emotions were absolutely out of control. It was as if she wasn't herself and the person she was becoming was hurting her Cosima. She inhaled deeply before biting her lip and replying.
"Cosima I…I don't want to hurt you. The last thing I want is to cause you pain…but I'm lost. This is new to me and I'm terrified. You make feel things that I'm not supposed to feel…things I never thought possible. Do you honestly think I don't care for you? Do you think I'm doing any of this on purpose? When I'm with you I feel whole Cosima. I feel like I don't need to eat or sleep or breathe because you are with me. You are everything to me and I don't want to mess this up don't you see that? If this doesn't work out, if you lose interest, I will have changed my whole life and be left with half of myself and that fear is crippling to me." Delphine replied, with tears now streaming down her face. She had not expected such an emotional evening and she was quickly becoming exhausted.
"Why is this so hard? If we feel this strongly shouldn't it be easy?" Cosima asked, wiping tears off of Delphine's, In spite of everything she couldn't believe how beautiful the woman looked, even when crying.
"I wish I knew Cherie…," was all she could whisper between sobs. She was now wracked with emotion and quivering from the cold. Cosima noticed this and reached out and wrapped her arms around her.
"I could never lose interest in you Delphine. You are the most fascinating person I've ever met. If anyone should be afraid of that it's me." Her tone calmed as she comforted Delphine and allowed her to cry. Once she regained composure, she held Cosima at an arm's length and looked at her intensely.
"Non, you are exceptional. I couldn't have ever dreamed I'd meet someone that makes me feel the way you do." Delphine admitted, knowing that the way she felt about Cosima was most likely the cause of her erratic behavior. She was afraid of having her heart broken and the near instant attraction between them was so strong that she was certain such a thing would destroy her.
Cosima was taken aback by Delphine's admission and she knew it was time to be honest about what she wanted.
"Then please…please let me in. Let me show you how much I want you and you alone Delphine."
As she made her request Cosima stepped back and Delphine looked down to face her. There was so much agony on both of their faces that anyone observing would assume they were enemies.
Delphine put her arms over Cosima's shoulders and awaited the brunette's response. Cosima moved in closer and took a moment to stare. The gaze allowed her to see Delphine in the dim lighting as she took the time to notice every feature on her face. She stood watching the woman adoringly as sounds from their surroundings echoed in the background. She saw Delphine's dimples as she offered a weak smile, and finally she acknowledged the desire in her eyes that was begging for Cosima to react.
After she was satisfied that she had committed the moment to memory, Cosima decided to give the Delphine what she knew she needed. She placed her left hand on the apex of Delphine's neck and pulled her in toward her until their mouths were inches apart. She could feel Delphine's breath on her lips but she was having trouble concentrating. Considering that the mere sight of Delphine made her heart beat faster, this closeness was causing her to lose self-control.
Delphine was growing impatient and began to whisper directions that she knew Cosima wouldn't understand. She just needed to express her want because she felt Cosima wasn't certain by her body language alone.
"Je suis ici , vous pouvez me toucher Cosima. Je veux que vous me touchiez." She exhaled weakly before biting her lip.
As Cosima stood awestruck by the woman, Delphine took Cosima's face in her hands and their lips met in a chaste kiss. Cosima then snapped out of her trance and returned with a desperate kiss, allowing her tongue to part Delphine's lips. As their tongues wrestled for dominance Cosima froze, shocked by Delphine's lack of hesitance. She'd always assumed she would have to gently guide Delphine through any physical interaction they would have. She was floored by how receptive the blonde was and how much she seemed to be longing for gratification.
Delphine had earlier confessed that it had been months since she was last intimate with anyone, which Cosima foolishly assumed contributed to her voracious grasping. They were wrapped around one another like they'd been locked away from each other for years.
Although Cosima enjoyed her fair share of lovers, she couldn't recall feeling so overwhelmed. The way Delphine looked into her eyes before crushing her lips with a sensuous kiss was reminiscent of what she thought prey witnessed before they were devoured. The way she felt about the blonde was making her consider what this moment truly was for her. This was more than lust, this was euphoria. The chance to revere Delphine in a way she was sure the woman had never experienced, both intrigued and aroused her immeasurably.
Their tongues continued to dance clumsily around one another before they found a rhythm. Cosima then slid her hands down Delphine's back roughly and rested them on her hips before biting Delphine's lip. Delphine whimpered at the ache and pinned Cosima forcefully against the wall, holding her hands at her sides. Cosima took the her aggression as an invitation to go further and she broke their kiss to gently grazed Delphine's neck with her lips. As she kissed her, she gently bit her pulse point causing Delphine to gasp in surprise and release her hands. As Cosima kissed her way back up Delphine's neck she began to nibble on her earlobe. The sensation prompted Delphine scratch the back of Cosima's neck as she held her head in place.
As their breathing became labored and they became more impatient in their movements, Delphine scratched her way down Cosima's torso before untucking her shirt. Delphine broke their kiss and began unbuttoning it, allowing her body to take control of her actions. Fueled by need, she wasn't allowing fears or inexperience to creep in and interfere with the pure bliss she was after. After her shirt was unbuttoned, the cold air had a sobering effect on her. Although she was fully engaged in their contact, Cosima began to remember that they were in public. They had been so wrapped up in the emotions of the moment they'd gotten carried away.
Once Delphine began to undo on her belt, Cosima took the time she had to breathe to pose a rational question.
"Uhhnn D, do you think we should go inside? Someone could see us…" She asked with a moan, before laughing at the fact that they were doing this outside a hotel. Delphine whined at the loss of sensation, chest heaving in the haze of longing.
"Oui s'il vous plaît. Me prendre dans votre chambre .Je ne peux pas attendre plus longtemps." Delphine replied breathlessly, before giving Cosima a small peck and helping her become decent. They then walked into the hotel hand in hand, avoiding eye contact with anyone fearing they'd been seen in the alleyway.