It was an hour or so after the dinner incident when Mirajane decided it was safe to venture out into the castle. Juvia and the Connells are asleep, giving Mirajane enough time to check outside. Seeing that the coast was clear, she went out into the hall, quietly closed the door behind her, and walked past a curtain where two voices were heard.
"And the Vulcan said to his wife, 'Honey, I'm ammunition for a big gun! Literally!'" cheered a male voice.
A female voice laughed, "Good one!"
Both Natsu and Lucy, who had been having a personal conversation behind the curtain, came out laughing their hearts out. The candelabra leaned on the wall and said, "So, Lucy, what do you say you and me come over to the kitchen for some snacks? Tonight's leftover night. We've got steak, pasta… What're you hungry for?"
Lucy giggled with a blush, "Oh, Natsu. You know I can't."
"Oh, yes," Natsu smirked devilishly.
"Oh, no!" Lucy blushed again as she retreated back to the curtain.
"Oh, yes!" Natsu cried happily, chasing Lucy inside the curtain.
"Oh, no!"
"Oh, yes!"
"Oh, no!"
"Oh, yes, yes, yes!"
"No, no, no!" Lucy laughed playfully, ducking under his arms. "I've been burned by you before."
Natsu wrapped his arms around Lucy, and smiled slyly, "Don't be silly. You haven't forgotten all those things I said about you back then? You and I are two of a kind. And no one can light my fire like you."
Lucy grinned seductively at Natsu, and the two were about to kiss, until Natsu suddenly dropped her upon noticing Mirajane out in the hall, heading downstairs to the kitchen.
"Spicy mackerels!" Natsu exclaimed. "She's out of the gate!" He hopped hastily after Mirajane.
Getting up from the floor, Lucy sighed in disappointment, "Another mess he's gotten himself into…" She then called to Natsu, "You know where to find me!"
Natsu called back, "I know!" As soon as he left, Lucy sighed with a smile.
Down in the kitchen…
Erza guided a very tired Wendy to the cupboard filled with other teacups, which are kids' hers and Romeo's age. Opening the door, Erza said, "Alright, now, Wendy. Into the cupboard with your brothers and sisters."
Wendy yawned, "But I'm not sleepy…"
"Yes, you are," Erza smiled.
"No, I'm not. I just want to play… with Romeo… a bit more…" Wendy fell asleep before finishing her sentence.
Erza assured, "Romeo is sleeping with his father. He'll be fine. I'm sure you'll have all the time with him first thing in the morning." She closed the cupboard.
"It's not fair!" the large stove Gajeel grumbled, examining his frying pans smothered in food. "I work and I slave all day long, making the best meals in the house, and for what? A culinary masterpiece gone to waste!"
"Stop your grousing, Gajeel," Erza fretted. "It's been a long night for all of us." She smiled as she added, "But I must admit, I like Mirajane a lot. She has a lot of spunk and attitude."
"Well, if you ask me, she was just being stubborn," Gray groaned, putting away a piece of napkin into the cupboard which closed by itself. "After all, Master Laxus did say 'please.'"
"Mr. Lightning Bolt actually said the magic word?" Gajeel looked up. "Really?"
Erza nodded happily, "Yes. In fact, that may be the first time he's ever asked politely for anything. Mirajane is already having a good effect on him. Now, if only Master Laxus could learn to control his temper, we might have a chance at breaking the—"
Gray quickly cut Erza off upon noticing Mirajane coming in. "So nice to see you up and about, Miss, uh…"
"Mirajane," the latter answered. "Call me Mira."
"Mira, right, I knew that," Gray chuckled.
"Oh, hi, Erza," Mirajane greeted Erza, kneeling down. "It's nice to see you again."
Erza smiled back, "It certainly is."
Gray grinned, "What a surprise running into you here. It's a pleasure to meet you, Mirajane. I'm Gray Fullbuster, head of the household."
Mirajane gently shook Gray's hand, "A pleasure to meet you, too."
"Howdy, lady! The name's Gajeel Redfox," the large stove introduced himself. "I'm the head chef of Fairy Tail Castle."
"And I'm Natsu Dragneel!" the candelabra dashed into the kitchen at breakneck speed and butted in front of Gray, much to his annoyance. Extending his candle, he gave a dashing smile, "I'm Fairy Tail Castle's estate manager, head waiter, and the coolest guy most girls see in their fantasies."
"Nice to meet you, Natsu," Mirajane giggled and offered Natsu her hand, which he proceeded to cover in kisses.
"Yeah, nice to meet you," Gray scowled as he hastily tried to get Natsu off Mirajane's hand, who continuously kissed it.
Natsu smirked, "Hey, don't hate me coz I'm hot, Gray. And you're not."
"Sorry about that," Gray apologized to Mirajane, whacking Natsu on the head. "If there's anything we can do to make your stay more comfortable, anything at all— Ouch!" Gray yelled as Natsu burned his arm with his candlestick.
Mirajane admitted, "Well, I am a little hungry…"
"You are?" Erza asked excitedly. She turned to the other servants in the kitchen. "Hear that, everyone? She's hungry! Stoke the fire! Break out the silver! Wake the china!" On cue, a whole bunch of dishes, silverware, and cooking utensils emerged from the cabinets and drawers and began moving at fast pace, chopping up vegetables, boiling water, and mixing ingredients.
"OH, YEAH!" Gajeel happily flared up with his stove flames. "Now that's what I'm talking about, baby! An after-dinner!"
"Wait, hold on," Gray whispered under his breath to Erza. "Remember what Master Laxus said?"
"Oh, nonsense!" Erza scoffed. "I'm not about to let the poor child go hungry."
"Oh alright, fine," Gray sighed, thinking he was giving into an ultimate demand. "Glass of water, crust of bread, and then—"
Natsu interrupted, "Gray, I'm surprised at you. She's not our prisoner, she's our guest! It's our job to make her feel welcome here." He then guided Mirajane over to the dining room, "Right this way."
Gray seemed torn between obeying Laxus and fulfilling his duty, but he reluctantly agreed, "Well, keep it down. If Master Laxus finds out about this, it'll be our necks!"
"Of course, of course," Natsu brushed off. "But what is dinner without a little… music?"
He closed the door which slammed Gray in the face, sending him flying into a bowl of pudding. He shouted, "MUSIC?!"
In the dining room, Mirajane sat down on a cushy chair in front of a very long table. Standing in the middle of it, holding a gold cap and a matchstick, was Natsu, with a spotlight shining from above. He announced, "Good evening, my friends. It is with deepest pride and greatest pleasure that we welcome you tonight. And now, we invite you to relax. Let us pull up a chair as the dining room proudly presents… your dinner." He gestured to the large array of scrumptious dishes and foods assembled on the table.
Natsu: Be… our… guest, be our guest
Put our service to the test
Tie your napkin 'round your neck, my dear
And we provide the rest
A chair sprung to life and tied a napkin around Mirajane's neck, but she just placed it on her lap.
Soup du jour, hot hors d'oeurves
Why, we only live to serve
Try the gray stuff, it's delicious!
Natsu held out a tray of gray pudding and Mirajane tasted it.
Don't believe me? Ask the dishes!
Natsu gestured to all the dazzling plates that came out of the cabinets.
They can sing, they can dance
They can even leap and prance!
And a dinner here is never second best!
Mirajane picked up a menu.
Go on, unfold your menu
Take a glance and then
You'll be our guest
Oui, our guest
Be our guest
A parade of food came before Mirajane.
Natsu and Servants: Beef ragout, cheese soufflé
Pie and pudding en flambé
Gray chose the wrong time to pop out of a pie, as Natsu set it on fire with his candles, burning the clock to a crisp.
Natsu: We'll prepare and serve with flair
A culinary cabaret!
He gestured to the pile of spoons falling and doing swimming formations on a punch bowl like scuba divers.
You're alone and you're scared
But the banquet's all prepared
No one's gloomy or complaining
While the flatware's entertaining
In a spout from the punch bowl, Natsu stood on a platform juggling his candlesticks.
We tell jokes, I do tricks
With my glowing candlesticks
Mugs appeared before Mirajane.
Mugs: And it's all in perfect taste that you can bet!
Natsu and Servants: Come on and lift your glass
You've won your own free pass
To be our guest
Natsu: If you're stressed,
It's fine dining we suggest
Gray got out of the pie and frantically tried to quiet everyone down.
Natsu and Servants: Be our guest!
Be our guest!
Be our guest!
The servants left, leaving Natsu and Gray standing on the table. A spotlight shone down on the clock, who smiled nervously.
Natsu: Life is so unnerving
For a servant who's not serving
Gray started to inch away, but Natsu stopped him.
He's not whole without a soul to wait upon
"Get off," Gray hissed to Natsu.
Natsu: Ah, those good old days when we were useful…
Suddenly, Gray noticed it was starting to snow and saw some salt shakers making it look like it was snowing.
Suddenly, those good old days are gone
Gray groaned in annoyance.
Ten years, we've been rusting
Needing so much more than dusting
Needing exercise, a chance to use our skills
Gray tried to get away from Natsu, who clung to his legs. Gray finally succeeded, only to fly into some jello.
Most days, we just lay around the castle
Flabby, fat and lazy
You walked in, and oops-a-daisy!
Natsu jumped onto a spoon in the jello, catapulting Gray out. Meanwhile, in the kitchen…
Erza: It's a guest! It's a guest!
Sakes alive, well, I'll be blessed!
Wine's been poured and thank the Lord
I've had the napkins freshly pressed
With dessert, she'll want tea
And my dear, that's fine with me
While the cups do their soft-shoeing
I'll be bubbling, I'll be brewing
I'll get warm, piping hot
As Erza was making the tea, she noticed a spot on her back through a reflection in one of the frying pots.
Heaven's sakes, is that a spot?
Clean it up! We want the company impressed
After a napkin cleaned the spot from her back, Erza and her teacup assistants got onto the tea cart and headed out of the kitchen. They handed Mirajane a cup of tea.
We've got a lot to do
Is it one lump or two?
For you, our guest
Servants: She's our guest!
Erza: She's our guest
Servants: She's our guest!
"Alright, that's enough. Show's over…" Gray intervened, only to see a stampede of servants sweeping towards him and he ran off screaming.
Servants: Be our guest!
Be our guest!
Our command is your request!
It's been years since we've had anybody here
And we're obsessed!
With your meal, with your ease
Yes, indeed, we aim to please
While the candlelight's still glowing
Let us help you, we'll keep going
Soon, the entire staff split into groups, revealing Natsu in the center wearing his gold cap, doing his own version of the box step.
Natsu: (joining in) Course by course
One by one
Till you shout, "Enough, I'm done!"
Mirajane gasped in awe as a glowing chandelier descended into the room with all the servants doing a chorus line.
Natsu and Servants: Then we'll sing you off to sleep as you digest!
Tonight, you'll prop your feet up
But for now, let's eat up
Meanwhile, Gray stood with the crowd, looking worried, but started to loosen up a little.
Natsu and Servants: Be our guest!
Be our guest!
Be our guest!
Please, be our guest!
The song came to an end and Gray was dancing happily, until Natsu shoved him aside in a finishing pose, the musical number concluding with champagne popping and bubbles exploding like fireworks.
Mirajane happily clapped, "Bravo! That was wonderful! The food, the furniture, the entertainment… Everything was amazing!"
"Thank you, thank you," Gray bowed. "Good show, wasn't it, gang?" He then pointed to his clock-face and yawned, "Oh, would you look at the time? I'll just escort you back to your room. It's off to bed with you…"
"But I couldn't possibly go to bed now," Mirajane said excitedly. "It's my first time in an enchanted castle."
"Enchanted?" Gray asked in surprise, chuckling nervously. "Who said anything about Fairy Tail Castle being enchanted? Like, literally?" He then turned to Natsu and snapped, "It was you, wasn't it, Pyro?!"
"Hey, I didn't say anything, Ice Boy!" Natsu argued. "You're the one with the mouth—" He was interrupted when Gray began beating Natsu up.
"I figured it out for myself," Mirajane explained with a sly smile, making both Natsu and Gray stop. "I'd like to have a look around, it that's alright."
"Oh!" Natsu smiled. "You would like a tour?"
Gray interrupted, "Wait a second, wait a second. I'm not sure that's a good idea." He whispered to Natsu, "We can't have you-know-who poking around you-know-where, if you know what I mean."
Mirajane added, "Besides, since you're the head of the household, I'm sure you know everything there is to know about Fairy Tail Castle."
Thinking it over, Gray grinned pompously and chuckled, "Well, actually… Yeah. I do."