Francis was laying in his bed staring at the ceiling feeling like a ghost of his former self. It had been a month since everything and Francis wasn't doing so well. After he punched the mirror and cut himself, Elizabeta tried to get him to see a doctor or get some form of help. He declined the help and insisted that he was just fine but she was making him go either way. No complaints, no buts about it. In a way Francis could thank her for looking out for him but in another way he wished that she didn't worry.

His phone beeped and he looked at it. It was Arthur's number? What the hell? For one thing he thought Arthur wasn't to contact him during this and why would he even call. Francis was still hurt by this but he was living with it and slowly accepting the hand life dealt him. Without a second thought he picked up his phone and answered.

"Arthur, you can't be calling me during this!"

"I talked to that brute we met the first day this investigation started, he said that since this is an emergency I could call you and let you near us." Arthur cried. This wasn't a very good sign and Francis knew it as he prepared himself for the worse to come.

"W-What happened?"

"It's Alfred! H-He hasn't been himself for a month and he never bothered to eat or talk to anyone, all he has done for this length of time was going to his room and doing his homework then staring at the wall! I even try to use McDonald's as a way to get him out of bed but that doesn't work. Today I was going to call him down to talk to him and then next thing I hear is fumbling down the stairs... I went to look and there's our baby at the bottom of the steps and he was pale and thin and there was blood coming out of his head! Come down here quickly please!" Francis couldn't move. As soon as those words reached his ears he felt like everything stopped.

"Francis are you coming or not?"

"Oui! I'll be there right away!"

"Thank you and do hurry." Arthur hung up the phone with a shaky breath and went over to Matthew who was shaking terribly. He clutched his Kumajiro bear to his chest tightly as every minute went by. Arthur kissed Matthew's head and hugged him.

"Don't worry love."

"Is Alfred gonna be okay?" The Brit looked into the sad eyes of his son. Nothing like this ever happened before and he could tell Matthew was worried about his brother.

"I... I certainly hope so. I want everything to be alright with your brother and I may seem like I don't care about you sometimes but you know I love you both right?" Matthew nodded and wiped his hair out of his face.

"We just wish you wouldn't drink so much."

"Matthew, I'm quitting. I'll give you my honor as a proper British gentleman that I am now. You see, I have a long family bloodline of alcoholics running through my veins dating back to God knows when. Every single man in my family has had it. My great-grandfather had it. My father has it. Hell, my older brothers have it. And I have it but I'm the only one who is doing a damn thing about it because I don't want you guys to follow my example and be an alcoholic or cut me out of your life all together." Rapid footsteps sounded down the hall and the pair turned to see Francis running down the hall. Matthew got up and met his father halfway with a hug.

"Papa it's so bad! No one knows what's wrong with him! Alfred just suddenly collapsed and I don't know how!"

"Shh Matthieu. Stop crying now. Be strong for him."

"I'm so scared Papa. I don't wanna lose my brother and I don't want this to be the one time I lose him forever." Francis could understand what Matthew was saying. Ever since they were in diapers, Alfred and Matthew have had a deep brotherly relationship and they were always there for each other from the times that made them laugh to the times that made them break down and cry. This is one situation that they never got to encounter until now.

"Mr. Kirkland?" A voice asked. Everyone turned around to see a doctor dressed in scrubs holding a clipboard. Arthur went up to the doctor who had a stunned look on his face from seeing Francis and Matthew.

"What's the verdict on my son? Is he alright?"

"Oh- umm. Yes. Alfred will be okay."

Arthur let out a relieved sigh. His baby was okay. One thing made Arthur very curious so he asked the million dollar question.

"What caused him to collapse like that?"

"His causes for the collapse were from going without food for too long and blood loss."

"B-B-Blood loss? What do you mean blood loss?"

"When we were in there with your son we saw scars on his thighs and we even saw a big gash on his wrist. At first we thought that it was something he got from a nail that might have been sticking out from your stairs like you said but we compared the wound with a cutting knife. I'm so sorry to say this but your son may be a-"

"Cutter." Francis finished the sentence. He had listened in on the conversation and was stunned to know that this was his son for a whole month. While he was sad he would have to see his son in a hospital room he was also sad that he had another son who was a cutter. He had already suspected Matthew on it and didn't call on it yet but to find out Alfred would do something like this.

"Yes. When we were going into working on the gash we noticed that the knife had gone through a vein in the wrist that should never be cut and that was the other cause of it. The scars on his thighs were mild and equally dangerous but I can only agree with my colleague who was with me that it was the knife going through that one vein that caused it. He would have slowly bled to death if he didn't walk when he did."

"Thank you doctor. Is there anything you could recommend for Alfred?"

"Yes. I would recommend him eating and taking time off from school to let his blood flow back correctly in his body. Also you should get your son into therapy to make sure that none of this happens again because next time, if he's not lucky, he could give into suicidal temptation and die." Matthew listened to the man's words. He knew that he could die if he didn't stop cutting. It would be a major obstacle for everyone to find out he was a cutter but he'd been living with this secret so long that he didn't really care.

"Can I see my brother?"

"Sure. But your fathers are going to have to stay out here because Alfred can only have one visitor at a time for now. He's in room 319."

Matthew nodded and went to his brother's room. When he walked in the lights were on bright and in the middle of the room in the bed was Alfred lying in it with an IV hooked up to him as well as a heart monitor. His head was lolling from side to side and Matthew took to mind that it was probably the meds kicking in to his system and making his head loopy. The other blond looked up and gave his trademark smile as if nothing was wrong.

"Hey Mattie! What happened why am I in here?"

"Do you really think I'm that stupid? We both know what happened."

"Do we have to go through this now?"

"Yes!" Matthew was scared as hell for his brother. Seeing his brother's motionless body at the end of the stairs and Arthur trying to wake him up like that had really burned an unforgetable memory in his mind.

"Why do you wanna know so bad anyways?"

"You're my brother! I was worried about you! I didn't know if I would ever get to see you again or not and I didn't want the last time I see you have to be at your funeral! Just tell me why you cut and starved yourself what happened with you and Feliciano... Please..." Alfred knew where his brother was trying to come from but he didn't want to tell.

"No Mattie... Its stupid why I starved and cut."

At that moment, Matthew knew what he had to do. Somewhere in the back of his mind he knew he would have to reveal his deepest secret to his family one of these days but he never once imagined he would have to say it in a hospital. On one part of his mind Matthew thought about not saying anything while the other side was telling him to do the right thing and do this. Matthew knew what was soon to follow but this is his brother and he can't hide this forever. What is done in the dark comes to the light. Alfred reached up and pet Matthew's head with a light smile.

"Mattie, what's wrong?"

"I... I-If you tell me why then I'll tell you a very... deep and personal secret of mine." I feel like I'm negotiating with a child. Matthew thought as his brother looked at him with a confused expression gracing his features. Alfred thought that he knew just about every secret about his brother there was to know but now that he knows that there's a dark and personal one, he felt like he didn't know everything and that what he was about to hear he wasn't going to like.

"What is your secret?"

"Non. You tell me yours and I tell you mine."

"Fine. I guess I should start from what happened with Feliciano. It was the day he invited me over and I was so pissed because of the investigation that I let my anger talk for me because I snapped at him and I called him stupid and said that I wished that something bad like what we were going through would happen to him. He got mad and told me how his parents died. I tried to apologize but he just told me to get the fuck out. Then, as you saw, I got into a deep depression that escalated from starving to cut myself. I wanted myself to hurt and I wanted to give myself pain." Matthew knew that there was something going on with Alfred and Feliciano but he never thought that Alfred would stoop that low with him.

"So I told you the truth. Tell me your secret." All Matthew did was roll up his sleeves showing Alfred his own scars.

Alfred was surprised. His brother. His little brother did this to himself and he never knew about it. A sense of shock combined with some sadness come over him. He lifted his hand and lightly touched the scars on his brother to see if they were real. Sadly, they were. Alfred felt a choked sob in his throat when he felt them.

Matthew was feeling a sense of regret for telling Alfred about his problem. Mainly because he'll tell their father which isn't a bad thing since it would save his life in the long run but to just imagine the looks on his fathers faces would be the real killer. Dad would be crying about this was all his fault and Papa would be disappointed that a promise they made long ago was broken. Once the shock passed there was silence between the two brothers until Alfred said something.

"How long?"

"Since we were twelve. The first time I cut, Dad was drunk and you two were yelling at each other. When you weren't looking I went into the kitchen and took a kitchen knife and went to the bathroom and cut myself with it. I don't know what happened. I felt so much happiness and it felt so good and I felt the pain I wanted to cause myself that I couldn't stop and when you and Dad argued and it was very bad or for no reason at all, I cut myself."

"D-Does anyone else know about it?" This is what made Matthew want to keep quiet and not say a word. How do you tell your brother, the one who you always go to when something is wrong with you, that the first person who found out about your problem was one of your best and most trusted friend? Alfred would be furious if he told him the truth. Hopefully Gilbert can keep his fat mouth shut so Alfred will never have to find out.

"You're the only one I have ever told. You're the first." Alfred numbly nodded and looked very distant. It was his fault that Matthew cut himself. His fault... This was something that He felt he would never be able to let go of. But then again they were both on the same boat.

"So. The Bonnefroy-Kirkland twins. A pair of cutters. Where else do you cut?"

"My thighs like you. Don't think the doctor wouldn't mention that." Alfred lightly chuckled as he used his arm to pull Matthew into a hug.

"We're very screwed up. Aren't we?"

"When you think about how our family is then yes. Yes we are." Unknown to the brothers, they were being watched.

Arthur and Francis were stunned. Arthur was very much stunned because he was the reason that Alfred and Feliciano were a thing and they have problems and Matthew had been cutting for a while now. How could he have not seen that? Then he remembered. The knife he saw on the bathroom floor the night Matthew ran away. He thought he was seeing things because There were times in his life that Arthur thought he saw something that he could swear on everything near and dear to him was real but no one else could see and he thought it was one of those things again. He started to break down and cry. He felt- No. He was the worst father ever. He couldn't even tell that something was wrong with both his children.

Francis was taking as hard as Arthur but he was staying strong. He now had his suspicion correct that Matthew was a cutter like him. Practically, they were a family of cutters save for Arthur who never cut one day in his life. He still remembered the promise they made. While he was a bit disappointed that the promise was broken he was also very sad that they were cutters like him. As he held Arthur in his arms he couldn't begin to think what had happened during those years. He already had the notion that they didn't have a very good family life from Matthew but trying to put himself into his shoes was something he tried and failed to do.

"I'm the worst father ever..." Arthur cried. Francis kept hugging him and trying to comfort him.

"You aren't the worst."

"Yes I am! I drank a lot, argued with Alfred, I laid my hands on those boys, hell I even hit Alfred one time and we constantly fought and there was no common ground for us to meet on as a family. What kind of father does that to his own children? I don't deserve to have these two live with me any longer. Francis, if you are found innocent in this investigation, which you and I both know you are, then I want you to take sole custody of the boys." Francis looked at him. Was Arthur serious? After doing this to him was Arthur freaking serious?

"A-Are y-you serious?"

"Yes! I'm planning to do this after the investigation is finished and done with. I haven't told the boys yet because I have not had the heart to do so yet."

"Shall I tell them?" Francis was about to go in but Arthur stopped him.

"No. Please don't tell them now. Alfred has just gotten out of surgery and is going through one hell of a heart break and Matthew just opened up about his problem and is probably still scared that he almost lost his brother. I think we can let them enjoy each other's company for now and cross the fragile bridge when we get to it." The Frenchman tried to say something but he didn't. The boys looked so happy and he couldn't do that to them. He sighed and walked away. Arthur, thinking Francis was abandoning them, followed him.

"Where are you going?"

"I was just going to go before I overstay my welcome to be near you three again and get myself arrested."

"That won't be needed Mr. Bonnefroy." The pair turned around to see the CPS guy walking over to them.

"What is this about?"

"Turns out we launched an investigation on the wrong family. When the tip was called we were really supposed to look for a Francois Bonnefroy and look into his family. We accidentally looked you up via spelling typo. I am sorry for any and all inconvenience the error may have caused you four. If there is anything you need at all then please let me know."

"Um yes. I need something. May I talk to you in private?" The man nodded and he and Arthur walked off until they were sure Francis didn't follow and no one would listen. Arthur told the man the story and of his plans to give Francis sole custody of Alfred and Matthew.

"Are you sure?"

"I am sure. As long as they live with me and my anger issues over the years they aren't safe. I'm such a sick bastard that I would do that to my babies. I loved them so much and what did I do? Hurt them. Yell at them. Make one of them want to cut himself. Chase the same one out. I'm basically a terrible father who shouldn't be taking care of them. At least with Francis they won't have to worry about me anymore and they'll feel safe."

"Mr. Kirkland, I know you are going through a lot but don't do something you may regret. I'm going to cut you a deal. Wanna hear it?"

"Sure."

"As you said you come from a long line of alcoholics and you were often neglected and beaten as a child?" Arthur nodded with a dark memory or two flashing in his mind.

"I won't completely have them separated from you but I will talk to the court to give Mr. Bonnefroy temporary custody while you go to therapy to talk to someone about your past and how it affects you now and rehab so you can kick your drinking habit a little bit more affectively. I will also need you to attend AA meetings so you can talk to other people like you and then either go for sole or joint custody once you have gone through at least ten AA meetings. How does that sound?"

"I'll take it. You know, every now and again I try to let them know I love them but the way I act shadows my words and they never believe me. I wanted to hand over sole custody to Francis because I loved them and I know that they'd be better off without me. Honestly I thought when I told you all this you would have gone to the authorities and have me arrested for abuse."

"I was thinking until you explained. I know that this isn't the way to go but from listening to you and kind of knowing the family history I didn't want to do that. I could never tear a family apart. You wouldn't believe how many children I've had to take away who lived in terrible domestic situations. I even remember my first case."

"What was it?"

"It was my first case and we got a tip from a concerned neighbor saying that these two kids were being allegedly abused by their father. It was my first job so they gave me the case. I went over to the house and one of the kids answered the door. It was one of them, a boy. He was so banged up that when he looked at me he was scared like hell. Then I remember seeing another boy taller and older than him come to the door and look at me the same way but with more fear. Their father came bounding down the stairs cussing and giving them threats to beat them and when he saw me he shut up. Just looking at the boys and hearing from the father that they weren't in the right place so I took them out and the father was arrested and he lost his parental rights as well as custody. We were about to put them into foster care when I stepped up to adopt them and take them in as my own kids."

"That is lovely."

"It is. Ever since then all we've ever done was stick as a family and, yes, they still get dreams of the past but they try to move forward as best they can."

"That is really a nice thing you did for them."

"They tell me all the time. Now I have to go and talk to two of the kids we just removed from an abusive household. See you around." Arthur nodded and then put his head in his hands. He instantly felt a wave of relief wash over him. He heard more footsteps and turned his head to see Feliciano making his way over. From his guess he must have heard the news and come as fast as he could.

"Where is he?"

"I'm assuming you mean Alfred. He's in room 319 with his brother. You should go in and see him, I think he really missed you." Feliciano nodded and went to Alfred's room. When he walked in he saw Alfred and Matthew talking when he was noticed. The uninjured blond left the room leaving the remaining two all alone.

"I got the call from Matthew. I came as soon as I could and I'm just glad to see you're fine and doing well."

"Are you still mad at me?"

"I can never stay mad for too long. I just can't believe you would ever say that to me and I know it was out of anger but still. I wish you didn't say that."

"I'm so sorry. Please forgive me. Ever since that happened I have been haunted by my words. I know I hurt you but I'm really crazy about you and I want the kind of relationship my parents used to have before any of our troubles began. When they were happy and in love. I want that." Feliciano walked over to Alfred's bedside and smoothed down some of his hair.

"Amore, I still love you and I don't want to be with anyone other than you but I think we jumped into our relationship too early."

"What are you saying?"

"This won't be easy but for right now I think we should stop our relationship and keep our friendship. We can try our relationship again when we're older."

"So you're basically friend-zoning me?"

"When you put it that way then yes. Look, we're just a couple of fourteen-going-on-fifteen year old teenage boys who don't know what the hell we're doing. This way we can just get comfortable until we decide we should try again. We act sixteen but we're just really a couple of kids." Alfred felt like his world was falling apart. He still cared about Feliciano and wanted a relationship but if this is what he wanted then he would do it.

"Ok. I can do this."

Feliciano smiled. "Thank you." A soft kiss was planted on his forehead before Feliciano left the room. It took a minute before Alfred silently sobbed. He didn't want this but he really loved Feliciano and he wanted to be with him forever so, in order to keep him, he had to do this. No matter how much it hurt his heart.

Me: Oh mah gawd. I can't believe I wrote this in five days. Anyways, I auditioned for a school play, crossing my fingers to hope that I got in!Imma find out Monday! Besides that, I am thinking of uploading two stories but I have no idea of uploading them. One of them I am finished with the first chapter and am writing the second one and the other one is an idea I just got yesterday which I posted a little snippet of on Instagram. Here are the summaries.

Story #1: We're Still Family- 7 years ago Feliciano left his family in Italy but on a bitter note so they haven't talked in a while. Now it is years later and he is happily married with a five year old son but what happens when his family comes to America for an unexpected visit? Will the memories of that night prevent him from moving on for the sake of his son? There are going to be AmeIta and Germano Mpreg kids and mentioned Mpreg in this story.

Story #2: Saved by a Walk- Matthew is walking alone while his parents argue over whatever and then Arthur, a social worker, happens to accidentally hit him with his car. Upon taking him to a hospital he learns something interesting about the kid's family situation. This one is a FACE Family AU too, but nothing like this one is.

Me: I wanna upload them but I don't know when. Maybe later or something but for right now, they're just ideas. Anyways, I hope I didn't disappoint and sorry if some of it was just bleh. I tried my best and after five days, this is what happens. If you liked then review, favorite, or follow. This is Janae AKA OrgyMemberXVII signing off! Bye :D