The *Dam dam DAAAAAM* I pretend to be your boyfriend so that one guy that is hitting on you is getting off your heels-AU. You know, that scene when some random guy sees someone being flirted with, who totally doesn't want to be flirted with, and same random guy just pretends to be his boyfriend so that the dude lets him alone

I felt like the typical situation here would happen at like a bar or club or something, so I decided to get a little more creative, and make this is in a not so typical setting. Enjoy!

Levi picked up a bag of apples, one was bruised, ugh, he put it down and grabbed another bag, examining the apples through the mesh bag holding them together. The apples passed his test and he placed them in his cart. He noticed two men standing by the tomatoes as he made his way to the general area. One, a tall brunet with green eyes, was pinned between an even taller ginger and the tomato stand. As he got closer, he could hear their conversation.

"So, do you come here often, Eren?" the ginger asked.

Was this guy seriously trying to get laid at a grocery store. Ridiculous.

"Well as often as I need to buy groceries," the brunet, Eren, it seemed, replied with a nervous chuckle. His discomfort was obvious. He saw Levi looking at them at his eyes opened wide. Levi could see the call for help in them.

"Tell me, Eren, how would you like to come back to my place,"

"I wouldn't actually like that,"

Was Levi an asshole? Yes. But that didn't stop him from grabbing the cereal box from his cart and making his way over to the pair, luckily, Mister Overly Muscular Ginger Man hadn't noticed him before.

"Eren, babe," Levi caught the attention of the ginger, "I got your favorite cereal," he shook the box and tossed it into the basket that Eren was clutching onto, just to sell the lie.

"Who is this?" the stranger said, now that he was standing at such close proximity, he could see that he was holding onto Eren's arm. Levi looked into Eren's eyes and saw both a thank you and an apology.

"I'm his boyfriend," Levi said, putting his hand on the wrist that was holding Eren, "and I would appreciate it if you would get your hands off of him"

The man smirked at Levi and Levi noticed Eren flinched, he glanced at the hand and could see that he was now squeezing Eren's arm.

What did I get myself into?

"What the fuck is your problem? Leave him alone," Levi said as he tighten his grip on the wrist and pried it off of Eren, as soon as the hand was off, he stood in between the two. He felt Eren grab a handful of his shirt from the back, poor kid was probably scared, this guy looked violent, not to mention he looked like shit. Eren was way out of this creeps league, hell, they weren't even in the same division, "leave now,"

"I'm not about to take orders from a shrimp,"

Levi glared at him. He was already pissed off that this guy obviously hadn't taken the hint that Eren wasn't interested and couldn't take no for an answer, and now he was going to make jokes about his size. Oh hell no.

He looked to the side and caught sight of Eren in his peripheral vision, "you might want to get out the way, love," as soon as Eren had stepped a good few feet away, Levi pulled his arm back and gathered enough force to punch the creep right in the gut. He doubled over and Levi took advantage to give him a swift kick on his back, effectively knocking him to the ground.

He saw there were now a couple people standing around them, just watching, even a few of the workers were just staring. Nobody had ever gotten into a fight at the grocery store before.

He took Eren's basket in one hand and his hand in the other, he walked them towards the door, settling the basket down by one of the stands on their way out. He had parked all the way in the corner of the parking lot, he had been pissed that he got such a crappy parking spot, but now he was sort of grateful. He didn't let go of Eren's hand until they were by his car. He looked over Eren's shoulder to make sure no one had followed them out.

He looked at Eren, who looked stunned, "thank you so much, sir!" he said.

"How old do I look? I am not a sir,"

"I'm sorry, but I don't know you're name,"

"Levi,"

"Levi," Eren repeated, "that's a nice name,"

"Thanks,"

The two stared at each other, it was a little awkward now. Levi didn't necessarily want to not say anything, he just didn't know what to say.

It was Eren who spoke, "thanks again, for your help. I really didn't expect you to do that," he placed a hand on the back of his neck, a faint blush dusted his cheeks. Levi found it endearing.

"Yeah, well, he called me shrimp," he tried to joke. Eren looked at him and started to laugh. Levi frowned, he hadn't meant for it to be that funny.

"I'm sorry, I'm not laughing at you, I just remembered his face when you punched him. It was priceless,"

"I took lessons," Levi smiled as Eren continued to laugh, "did he just start hitting in you?" Levi couldn't say he wasn't at least a bit curious as to how everything had started.

"Well I noticed him on the bus and we got off at the same stop," he fiddled with the hem of his shirt as he spoke, "I didn't think much of it since it's a pretty busy stop, but then he went into the same store as me and I saw him a couple times pass by the aisles I was in,"

"You should have told one of the workers," Levi said.

"I know that now, but I didn't think he would actually do it, I mean its not crazy to think we just happened to be going to the same place. Coincidences do happen," he was looking back at Levi now.

"Good point," Levi said, "you said you took the bus here?"

"Yeah," Eren tilted his head, "why?"

"Well, it seems as though we both intended to do some grocery shopping today and we came out with nothing. So I'm going to head over to another store. Do you want to tag along?" god, Levi hoped that didn't sound creepy. Eren already had to deal with one today, "and also it would be best if we get out of here as soon as possible, don't want to risk him coming outside and seeing us again,"

"That sounds like a great idea!" Levi smiled and unlocked his car, Eren rounded the car and got into the passenger side, "it kinda sucks though, all I needed were those damn tomatoes and I would've been out of there,"

"All I had was a box of cereal, apples and some vinegar," Levi made sure Eren had on his seatbelt before he started the car.

"Sounds like you could have made a delicious meal out of that,"

"I could invite you over to dine on said delicious meal,"

"Can't wait,"

"You know, I could be a serial killer for all you know," Levi said when he was backing out of his spot, "and you've already agreed to both shopping and dinner,"

"I guess that's true. But what are the chances that we're both serial killers,"

Levi stopped the car and looked at Eren, this kid was something else. Levi burst out laughing, he didn't remember the last time he had laughed like this. Not when Hange had shown up at his apartment at 2 in the morning, drunk as all hell in nothing but a bathing suit. Not when Erwin had tripped and landed in a huge puddle during one of their morning runs. His laughter filled the car and he noticed Eren smile before he joined in.

(Btw did you guys catch that HIMYM reference?)