Chapter 11

Saturday - September 24rd

Ten phone calls. Not a single answer.

It was approaching four o'clock in the morning and Chloe had yet to return. She had gone out with some of her old friends. Beca had politely declined their invitation. The redhead had told her that she would return at one o'clock at the latest.

Beca was beginning to worry. Actually, she had been worrying since two o'clock. Now it was closer to fear. There was a chance that the group got side tracked but ten missed calls is too many.

She was sat on the couch, twiddling her thumbs and mindlessly watching the television. She couldn't sleep and if it became five o'clock before Chloe returned, she would have to go out there and find her.

Try the phone again...

Nothing.

Another cup of coffee to occupy her time, the effects of the caffeine not really needed. In fact, the taste was getting to her. She had brushed her teeth twice already. She was actually happy that she couldn't fall asleep. Her waking thoughts were currently filled with all the horrible things that might have happened to Chloe, she didn't really want them to become nightmares.

At half past four, a knock could be heard at the door. Beca practically sprinted to it and opened it to find a very inebriated Chloe. Her clothing was falling off her and she wasn't standing straight. Her eyes were unable to focus, darting around the place.

"Where have you been?!" The brunette hadn't said anything for the past few hours and all of her worry at the situation was about to come out.

"Lost track of time." With that, Chloe made her way past Beca into the room.

The smaller, now bewildered girl, rushed in after her. "You didn't answer any calls, I was worried."

"We were fine, Beca." There was a bite to her tone.

"You don't look it. How'd you get home?"

"Walked." The bar was really far away, Chloe was in no state to get home on her own. Beca was even angrier at the redhead's so-called friends who had allowed her to get home like this.

"You're barely holding it toge-"

"I'm fine!" Chloe shouted, immediately silence the younger girl.

A few seconds ticked by which felt much longer for Beca.

"I was just-"

"I am a grown woman, Beca. I don't need to you protect me. I can take care of myself. I'm not you're fucking damsel in distress!"

"Chlo-"

"The last time you tried to 'save' me, you nearly got yourself killed so I'll kindly ask you to stop! I'll judge if I'm ok, I'll decide when I come home and if you don't like it, you can leave!"

Beca was utterly confused. This was a side of Chloe she had never seen before. She had no idea where this was coming from. There were no real words coming to her, totally unprepared for the verbal assault coming from the other girl.

"I'm sorry, Chloe." It was all she could muster.

Chloe was still visibly teeming and stormed into the bedroom.

Morning. No warm body snuggling up next to her. A major headache and a horrible taste in her mouth. The light from the window is not the pleasant glow she needed to wake up.

Chloe turned in the bed to see that Beca really wasn't there. It took her a few seconds, during which time she thought about where the brunette might be, to remember what had happened the night before.

She wanted to scream. Out loud.

To put it bluntly, her interactions with her so called friends last night had gone incredibly poorly. They were judgemental, sometimes rude and came across as not really caring about her. Initially, she had stayed long enough for them to become comfortable with her again but that didn't go according to plan. She realized just how awesome Beca, Aubrey, and Stacie truly were. Around two in the morning, they had left her at the bar and she had just drunk herself silly, talking to an uninterested bartender. It was an oddly low moment for her.

There was also a frustration. Most of them had girlfriends and boyfriends with them and some were even married. Chloe had no one. Jealousy reared its ugly head. Throughout the night, every time she looked at one of the other couples, all she could think about was her cute little brunette waiting for her at home. She wished she could have told them about her amazing girlfriend. Beca was certainly amazing, she just wished the girlfriend part was true.

Then she had come home to make matters worse. Frustrated with the night? What better way to improve it than shout at the person who cared about her the most. That had gone perfectly. Flashes of Beca's face began reappearing, the hurt look on her face. She hadn't even tried to fight back against the false accusations. Chloe knew that if anyone else had been screaming at Beca, they would not have gotten off so lightly.

Her words had been hurtful. They were also directed at the wrong person. Beca had never treated her as the damsel or questioned her ability and skill regarding any aspect of their lives. She was never too proud to ask for help. Beca never made her feel inadequate, their relationship was mutualistic, beneficial to both sides and most importantly, equal.

She knew Beca's motivations for her actions regarding the redhead. Yet, she had still gone and said something truly vile.

The headache would have to try harder if it was going to stop her from fixing this situation. Jolting out of bed was a bad idea though, momentarily disorienting her. She made her way to the bedroom door and opened it.

The first thing she noted was the smell, her vision still not great so soon after waking up. There was an aroma of bacon floating through the room. As her sight cleared, she could see Beca, in a red shirt and blue shorts, cooking. Her headphones were on so she was oblivious to Chloe's presence.

As she walked further into the room, a few other things could be seen. For one, the couch still had a blanket on it as well as a pillow. More guilt to be added onto the pile. She had gotten in much later than she had told Beca she would and the brunette had stayed awake the whole time waiting only to feel like she couldn't sleep on the bed that had been theirs for so long.

This headache should be so much worse, I deserve it.

In the kitchen area, she found two plates with eggs, toast and pancakes drizzled with honey. The bacon was frying on the pan and Beca was paying careful attention to it.

Chloe tapped her on the shoulder, causing the other girl to jump a little and turn around, her headphones dropping to her shoulders.

"Hey," she said, looking apprehensive and thereby making Chloe feel even worse.

"Hey," the redhead replied.

A few moments of silence where Beca looked like she was searching for something in her eyes while Chloe tried to formulate the correct response. She hadn't even expected the brunette to be here.

"Are you okay?" She was completely thrown by the question. Beca was concerned about her well-being right now?

"I'm fine, Becs."

"Good."

"I'm really sorry about yester-"

"It's okay, Chlo."

"No it isn't. I didn't mean any of the things I said. I was so angry yesterday after seeing my former friends that I was in a foul mood and I ended up drinking far more than I should have and talking to a bartender who doesn't give a damn about me for hours on end and then I get home and shout at you when you hadn't done anything wrong. In fact, you've been awake all night worrying about me and then I attack you the moment I walk into the room and I'm so sorry." Chloe gasped.

"It really is okay, Chloe," Beca said, smiling.

Chloe looked down. "I thought you had left," she whispered.

Beca walked up to her, taking her hand. "You said that if I make a mistake, you wouldn't run from me. That works both ways."

Chloe allowed herself to slump and put her weight against the smaller girl who hugged her. "I'm so sorry."

"Stop apologizing." Beca ran her hand against Chloe's back. The sensation was incredibly soothing. "I made breakfast, thought it might help with the hangover."

The brunette then kissed her on the cheek. Even though Beca had started giving her kisses, they were rare and so unflinchingly gentle and tender that it was all Chloe could do to not melt. She cherished each one.

The pair ate at the dinner table for once, the sound of the television would not have been pleasant. Chloe couldn't stop glancing at Beca and smiling. She was so incredibly lucky. Beca had stayed. She wasn't even angry.

Chloe knew she had to make up for any hurt she might have caused and it didn't feel like a fitting punishment because it just meant that she would be spending even more time with Beca. Punishments were supposed to be hard.

Beca insisted on clearing the plates. Chloe watched and waited for her to finish.

"Come on," she said once the other girl was finished.

"Where?" The brunette asked.

"I'm going back to sleep and I need you in my bed."

Beca blushed and followed her.

Sunday - September 25th

Chloe was alone on Sunday. Beca needed to be back home to work out some things with her apartment. She had repeatedly told the redhead that it had nothing to do with what happened and that she wasn't upset with Chloe.

It was only after demanding that she stay a little longer that Beca finally left around midday. Chloe decided to work on her novel. While she had the first half written in a draft form, she was struggling to continue. The outline of the plot had problems.

The ending. She had been sure that once she covered all aspects of their relationship, she could find a way to conclude in a satisfying way. Both characters evolved throughout the story, changing their outlook once the conclusion neared. The evolution didn't feel complete though.

She didn't believe that her novel needed explosions or a big twist to conclude it. However, while her characters had grown, they had yet to make an impact on the world or truly manifest in the narrative.

That was the true problem.

She took a look at Beverly and Clarissa. The most important and interesting aspect of their relationship was how dependent they become on each other. She attempted to paint dependency in a positive way. They were not weakened by their need for the other, it actually made them happier which improved other aspects of their lives. It was certainly true for her and Beca. The words she was typing were a testament to that.

Exploration.

She dug into the more hidden parts of her mind and began writing about more unsafe aspects of the relationship. If this was going to be about Beca and Chloe's relationship, then it would be unfair to not record what she was truly feeling right now. That was where the hiccup in the novel had occurred. Chloe had come to the point in where the line of friendship was blurring and while she could finish there, it would be ambiguous and with the way she had written so far, it would be incredibly unsatisfying.

She focussed on Clarissa, her character. More scenes were created, this time with intimacy. These new parts were not to display an aspect of their friendship, it was to convey an emotion through words. They contained no real plot. As the story progressed, these intimate moments would increase and begin to seem less like friendly interactions.

The first part of the novel had already covered some aspects of intimacy. Specifically the newly discovered feelings the two characters got from it. The second part would be understanding what it meant.

The third part.

Using her own experiences was more difficult than she imagined. For her to truly write the third part, she would need to come to terms with and understand what she was feeling completely. She wasn't totally oblivious but there was a fear to what she would discover if she focused on it for too long.

Her novel needed her to do it though. It was the only way it would be complete and the only way she would be satisfied with it.

She began reading through the few chapters she had written down as well as the detailed plot outline she had constructed so far. Clarissa's emotion and thought process were fully captured as it reflected her own.

Happiness. That was the primary emotion she felt as she read. All the scenes were reminders of her time with Beca. Each one also triggered memories she had yet to write down. Moments that were so strangely vivid in her mind despite their simple nature.

Every touch, she remembered.

Every smile, a calming ripple.

Every kiss, an imprint on her mind.

That was the answer to her question and the way she wanted to continue the novel.

Love.

She was in love with Beca.

Her story was about friendship and the aspects of that but she was beginning to realize that it was also coated with a thick layer of obliviousness.

It was interesting to look at the things her memory clung to. Things like her childhood memories and certain experiences were ingrained into her and were unlikely to be forgotten. It was the things that were missing from the recent years that surprised her the most. She couldn't remember much about her time at college for example and looking back, it didn't seem all that important to keep.

Her most important memories were spaced pretty evenly apart from each other. Nothing too significant happened close together. It was only when she reached closer to the present that a cluster of important memories presented themselves. They all involved Beca and her mind clung to them with the same vice grip that held onto her older memories. She could try to frame that as the memories being fresher. The problem with that is that there were memories that were very recent that were only a faint glimmer, memories that could be considered more important than a simple kiss she gave Beca before the pair of them went to sleep. Yet the kiss was the one that remained, vivid and colorful in her head despite being half asleep when the event occurred.

Taking that inspiration, she began completing the outline to the story. Clarissa would start to identify differences in her emotion when around Beverly. These new chapters would have mundane moments that would be significant to Clarissa. Chloe wanted to capture how important something as simple as holding Beca's hand was to her.

Eventually, Clarissa would fall in love with Beverly.

Where would she take it from there? There were two options.

The first would be for Clarissa to reveal her love for her friend. Beverly would be surprised, say she is flattered and that she wishes to remain friends despite the new revelation. Clarissa would continue to love Beverly but move onto someone else. Chloe thinks this is the most realistic scenario given the circumstances.

The other option was special. It would start the same way as before but Beverly would reveal that she loves Clarissa as well.

The redhead could already see all the ways the scenario could play out.

Beverly would kiss Clarissa while she was trying to roll pastry, causing the rolling pin to fall from her hand and the flour to be knocked from the table. The two of them would ignore their surroundings, overwhelmed by the kiss.

Or, the two of them go to a theatre and watch a heartbreaking movie. Clarissa would come home and be a little depressed. Beverly would kiss her to cheer her up and it would only register a few moments after contact that she was kissing her best friend only to become lost in the action.

Or, Beca kissing her in the rain, under her favorite tree in the park. Chloe telling the brunette that she loved her and Beca reciprocating. The two of them walking home holding hands and falling asleep on the couch, exhausted from a long day at work.

She had to stop herself from falling into the fantasy.

This was her book and if it was going to be somewhat fantastical, she was going to have the best possible ending for the two characters. By the time she completed the book, she will have told Beca how she feels. She can have the book as a reminder.

Her novel might end up being a depressing fantasy. One she could look at to see what could have been.

Or it could be a true reflection of their relationship. One that would be a reminder of the way their love evolved.

Regardless, Clarissa and Beverly would fall in love and live happily ever after.

Chloe had already fallen in love with Beca. She would have to wait for the outcome of this story to conclude.

Monday - September 26th

Stacie and Chloe had been meeting up for tea for a while now. At least once a week, Beca and Aubrey would be tied up with other things and it would give them time to talk. It became about perspective for the redhead. They shared a lot of things together and it was about giving the other advice about certain decisions. Most of the time though, it was just about voicing out your thoughts to someone who was willing to listen and actually care.

Why wasn't she doing this with Beca? There was a reason for that.

The discussion tended to be about the brunette and the blonde who weren't present. They had never talked explicitly about Chloe's attraction to Beca or Stacie's obvious infatuation with Aubrey. It was always just behind the surface though.

"So how are you and Beca?" Stacie asked. This was usually how the questions went, phrased as though the two of them were already together.

"We're fine."

"Good."

"How are things with Bree?"

"Fantastic."

Today's chat felt a little different, like they were both hesitating. Stacie couldn't seem to keep still. Chloe wasn't doing great either, she was the furthest thing from calm but she needed to get this out to someone.

"I think I'm in love with her," she finally said. "I'm in love with Beca."

Stacie took a moment to respond. "I'm in love with Aubrey."

The redhead let out the breath she was unaware she was even holding. "It's stupid."

"What is?"

"Being in love."

Stacie tilted her head in confusion. "How come?"

"Because as I've grown older, I've become more cynical. Whenever people say they're in love, I tend to think the feelings they are describing are exaggerated. The only people who have been constants in my life have been my family. Friends tend to come and go. So the idea that a new individual could come in and become so significant always seemed like such an insane idea. Being in love looked like a fantasy that only existed in fiction. Sure, it has a basis in reality but I didn't believe that you could find someone who you felt that strongly about."

"Why is it stupid?"

"Because I never thought I'd find someone like Beca. I have no idea how to go about this. I feel like a hormonal teenager again who can't figure out her feelings and is moping around trying to find 'answers'."

Stacie smiled at the description. "I don't think that's stupid. You want to tell her, you just don't know how?"

"It's not only that."

"You think she'll reject you?"

Chloe shook her head. "I can handle rejection," she said. "But I've never told one of my friends I'm in love with them. How will they take it? Beca is my best friend. She may accept it but it'll create an awkwardness between the two of us. I don't want our relationship to be damaged by telling her."

Stacie took a sip of her drink. "We both seem to have the same problem."

"Why haven't you told Aubrey? Are you afraid of rejection?"

Stacie sighed. "Yeah, for the first time in a long time. Bree isn't another person who I can have a little fun with without too much emotional attachment. I don't feel like I bring anything that she would want out of a relationship. I don't think anyone has seen me as girlfriend material and I have no idea how to get her to see me like that."

"You're worrying too much. She likes you because you're awesome. You're just a little too oblivious to see it."

They smiled at each other. Their talks didn't always end in answers but they came away a little happier.

"You should tell her," Stacie said.

"I will if you will."

Chloe didn't need to worry about Aubrey's response. She knew the blonde would return those feelings wholeheartedly. It didn't even seem like a fair deal but if she could get Stacie to confess to Aubrey, then the pain of getting rejected by Beca would be somewhat lessened.

"You know I wasn't talking about you when I said that friends come and go. I don't think you'll disappear," the redhead said.

Stacie nodded. "I know."

Even if all of this didn't work out, she could see that she had made some lifelong friends.

"Bree and I got called into HR the other week. Apparently they thought that we were a couple. They wanted us to fill in some paperwork so that it was noted in the company files."

"Same thing happened to us. How'd it go for you guys?"

"The most unexpected thing was how happy it made me feel when Harriet told us. I almost answered yes when she asked if we were in a relationship."

"I wrote 'Beca & Chloe Forever' on a cake we made together. Beca didn't complain."

Stacie grinned. "I forced myself to watch the scariest movie I could find so that I had an excuse to snuggle up with her."

"I managed to leave a love bite on her neck."

"I force her to eat breakfast, a meal she likes to miss constantly, by sitting on her lap and spoon feeding her cereal while we watch early morning cartoons."

"Beca's more into the Disney channel."

Stacie pulled out her phone and presented it to Chloe. Her wallpaper was a selfie of the two of them. Aubrey was holding the camera and blushing madly, the brunette kissing her on the cheek.

The redhead took out her phone and started scrolling through the address book. She selected one of the numbers and dialled it. She then turned the phone so Stacie could see it. The screen said 'Calling Honey'. Moments later, Beca's voice came through the phone.

The two of them continued to share stories back and forth and eventually lost track of time. This was the first time they had delved into this area of conversation. They might as well have been in their pyjamas at a sleepover with the way things were going. Beca would be the first person to read her book but Stacie and Aubrey would get the next copy.

Their time was coming to a close. Chloe got up and hugged her friend. They had to return to their respective partners, now feeling a little better knowing that there was someone else out there going through similar problems.

"Good luck," said Stacie.

"You too."

Thanks for reading!

Thanks to the Xwritr(sorry I missed you last week, I put you in but the period in your name automatically removed you), icy wolf, xXFreakyUnicorn7689Xx, bechlau, Joshifer4Everlark, BusinessGrad, Guest, until its gone, CapAmerica21, AWBlake(same with you) , UnicornBitch and CherryFlavouredPoison for their reviews.

Thanks to all those who favorited and followed the fic.

As always, the chapter specific cover images are up on my tumblr.