Another Chance – Chapter Five

Everybody loves the things you do
From the way you talk
To the way you move

Everybody here is watching you
Cause you feel like home
You're like a dream come true

You look like a movie
You sound like a song

It's hard to admit that
Everything just takes me back
To when you were there

And a part of me keeps holding on

Just in case it hasn't gone
I guess, I still care
Do you still care?

You still look like a movie

You still sound like a song...

It took another month before Holly and Gail were able to set a time to talk. Both were busy with cases and Holly being the Chief Medical Examiner in Toronto and her reputation as a great one and meticulous other divisions would request for her to work on their cases.

Gail told Holly that they can have dinner at her house and she will cook. And that if she wanted she could also bring Maya.

But Holly didn't think that with Maya there they won't be able to talk. And they had so much to talk about. Despite what happened in the past, she wanted Gail in her life because once, they were friends. She dropped off Maya at her sister's house and would pick her up the following morning.

Gail told her to not bring anything, just herself. She'll take care of the food and the wine.

Holly wasn't surprised that Gail now has a place of her own. She remembered a conversation they had before when Gail mentioned that once she makes detective, she will get her own place. The place was exactly how she pictured it. It was simple and there wasn't much decorations and she just had a few pictures on the wall.

"Wow, a place of your own, huh? No more smelly boys?" Holly jokes, to break the ice when Gail answered the door and Gail looked obviously nervous.

"I grew up, Lunchbox. Plus detective salary pays more." Gail countered.

They talked about work and Maya during dinner. Gail just listened to Holly as Holly talked about Maya and saw how her eyes lit up when she talked about Maya. It was obvious that Maya is Holly's world. Gail wondered if there would be a place in Holly's life now. But she couldn't think about this. They needed to talk. She needed to tell Holly about everything the past 5 years.

After putting away the dishes, Gail joined Holly in the living room.

"So I guess it is time that we talked?" Holly asked.

"Yes. Holly, tell me about Jen? I hope you don't mind."

"Not at all. I don't mind telling you about her. Jen, was beautiful and smart. And she really loved me. I don't think anybody has ever loved me the way Jen did." Gail could see Holly's eyes water.

"I met Holly in San Francisco about 6 months after I moved there from Toronto. I bumped into her in a café. She was a programming engineer at Google. We talked and it felt good to finally meet someone in San Francisco that I felt comfortable with. When I moved there I didn't know anybody and I felt lonely. At times I felt like I wanted to come back here but I just couldn't. We started out as friends and then we eventually started dating. After about a year, I got an offer in Seattle so we moved there, A year after we moved there, we decided to start a family. I wasn't getting any younger, so decided to get pregnant. Jen was so ecstatic when I told her I as pregnant. I have always wanted to be a mother, I just wasn't sure when it was going to happen. It was bitter sweet actually because a few months after that, Jen was diagnosed with cancer. It was stomach cancer, one of the worst and as a doctor, I knew Jen didn't have much time. So before she got worse, she wanted everything to be settled, and asked me to marry her so that everything, her money, stocks from Google, Apple and Amazon would be mine to sell if I wanted to after she dies. She also set up funds for Maya. We knew we were having a girl and I have talked about how much I love the name Maya. So we got married, it was her last wish. Jen was the most caring person I have ever met. She was so giving, unselfish and loved me unconditionally." Holly continued and this time she let the tears flow.

"It was obvious she loved you a lot, Holly." Gail said.

"Huh? What do you mean? How did you know?" Holly asked, wiping her tears when Gail handed her tissues.

"After you left I looked for you. Then when I saw you in the papers when you worked on that case in Seattle that crossed over to Vancouver. I called the Seattle PD and told them who I was. I was able to get your address and from across the street, I saw you and Jen, you guys were going to work that working. I saw how happy you were and I decided not to approach you. So I left and came back to Toronto. You looked so happy that day Holly and I didn't want to ruin your day and your life for that matter by reappearing in it."

"You were looking for me? Why?"

"I wanted to tell you the truth. I wanted to apologize and beg for your forgiveness."

"What did you lie about Gail?" Holly asked, looking confused.

"That I love you. And I lied when I said you were just an experiment and that I loved men. And that I wasn't gay. I was a coward and I lied. I am so sorry for hurting you."

"So you were in love with me?"

"Yes. But even then, after I realized how in love I was with you, I felt like I didn't deserve you. The Gail then wasn't ready for a relationship. I was self-destructive and a brat. I think I would have found a way to sabotage our relationship no matter what. I wasn't the person you deserved back then. Holly, you were and still are too good. I am so sorry that I caused you so much pain back then and that I drove you away from here. You are the most wonderful person I have ever met."

"It took me awhile to accept things and whatever anger I felt then for you, it was gone when I met Jen and had Maya. I realized that things do happen for a reason. If I had stayed here, I wouldn't have met Jen and I wouldn't have Maya. And I can't imagine a life without Maya. She is everything to me."

"She is beautiful and precious, Holly just like you. I know that I don't have the right to ask you this but I will because I am not that coward anymore. I am not that Gail anymore. I wanted to ask you if you would allow me to be a part of your life again. Yours and Maya's, in whatever capacity, I want to be in it. Because the truth is, I am a better person when you are in my life."

"Gail, I would really like for us to be friends again. But I want you stop thinking so small of yourself. You are a good person, You always have been but you just needed to figure things out and have and learn to accept the real you. And that being vulnerable is fine and that it doesn't mean you are weak. It just means, you are human. If you weren't a good person, I wouldn't let you in my life. And Maya's life. You can break my heart but you can't break Maya's. So if you want to be in our lives, you have to stay in it."

"I'd like that. I really want us to be friends again. And I promise I will stay. You can't get rid of me even if you wanted to." Gail said.

So now that we are friends again, I have been meaning to ask you, how come you are not married yet or in a relationship? Haven't met the perfect man yet? Or should I say perfect woman?" Holly teased.

"No man. I haven't been with a man since Nick. I am gay Holly, I know that for sure. I am a lesbian, I am not bi. After that night, there was no going back to men for me Holly."

Holly laughed.

"So no men but any women?"

"There was one, we were on and off for a year. But it was unfair to continue because I knew that she wanted more than what I could give her. I told her that before we ever got involved, that I gave my heart to someone a long time ago."

"Gail…"

"Holly, like I said, I am not expecting anything. If all we ever will be are friends, then I will take it."

"Let's just take it one day at a time, Gail. We'll see what happens."

"Okay." Gail said.

Holly noticed the time and it was getting late.

"Well, I better get going. It's late."

"Are you sure you are going to be okay going home?"

"I'll be fine Gail. By the way, I am going to pick up Maya at my parents tomorrow morning, do you want to come with me to pick her up and then we can grab breakfast, if you are not doing anything tomorrow?"

"I'd love that."

"Okay. I'll come pick you up tomorrow morning then. Goodnight Gail.

Holly took a step and pulled Gail into a hug.

"Thanks for coming Holly. And thank you for letting me into yours and Maya's life"

Holly smiled, "We all deserve a second chance. If I have learned anything from Jen, life is too short."

"Text me when you get home."

"I will. Bye Gail."

"See you tomorrow morning, Holly."

Autho'r Note: Some of you have commented that Holly let Gail back into her life too quickly. My explanation is that it has been five years and Holly is not the type to hold on to anger. And Holly is different now too since she lost Jen, a woman she deeply loved and having Maya.