It was the following day and everyone was in shock after finding out about Mel.

Ruby had been so upset but had become extremely quiet which was worrying Rachel. Phil wasn't saying much either.

Rachel's three children had all been really close with their Auntie so were naturally incredibly upset as well.

Despite how much Rachel and Mel used to argue, she was still Rachel's sister so Rachel was also struggling to come to terms with the loss of her sister.

The whole thing didn't seem to have sunk in yet.

Rachel was stood in the utility room sorting out the washing. She'd washed her hair but done nothing with it so it was stuck out all over the place, she had no makeup on and she was just wearing a pair of tracksuit bottoms with a hoodie.

Rachel put a white load of washing on and stood there watching it spin for a minute or so.

She noticed a red tea towel in there amongst all the white washing and suddenly burst into tears.

Chris had just come in from taking the rubbish out to the garage so found his wife sat down on the floor with her back against the cupboards sobbing. Chris had taken the day off work knowing Rachel was going to need some support today.

He sat down next to his wife and held her for a few minutes while she cried. He wasn't used to this, he was so used to Rachel being the strong one but the whole Mel thing had seemed to affect her badly.

Rachel allowed herself to cry into the man she loved for a while but then she realised she needed to pull herself together. Not for her, but for the sake of those children who were all depending on her.

"I need to go to the supermarket and get something for tea"

"Let me go"

"No I'll go, I just need a bit of time to myself and then when I get back I'll be fine. Just keep an eye on the kids for me"

"I will"

Rachel put her raincoat on as the weather was terrible, it felt like a winter's day. Chris was shocked that his wife was going out the way she was, normally she wouldn't be seen dead looking like that.

Rachel was just opening up the front door when Ruby walked in.

"Auntie Rachel where are you going?"

"Can I go with you?"

"No I'm going on my own, you stay here with Uncle Chris"

"Okay" Ruby said with tears filling her eyes, but Rachel didn't notice this because she'd already walked out of the door

Ruby ran up to her bedroom and closed the door behind her.

It was all her fault that her Mum had died, and now not even her Auntie loved her anymore so she realised she couldn't be here anymore.

Everyone was going to blame her for Mel's death so it would just be easier if she left.

Ruby picked up her rucksack and put some stuff into it. She found her favourite teddy, the one Rachel had bought for her when she was born, and put it in,

She couldn't quite do up the zip so the teddy's head was sticking out the top of her rucksack.

Ruby put the bag on her back and then went downstairs.

All the children were in their rooms and Chris was too busy watching the football to hear her come down the stairs or leave the house.

Ruby hadn't even realised it was raining until she got outside but she couldn't risk going back inside to get a coat now in case she was seen.

Ruby started plodding along, walking through all of the puddles and not trying to avoid them.

It was a really misty day so when Ruby had been walking for about 5 minutes she turned around and had no idea where she was. So even if she wanted to go back now she couldn't. Not that there would ever be any point in going back, everyone was going to hate her.

Rachel was starting to feel guilty about not letting Ruby come with her. The girl obviously just wanted to be with her Auntie, the one woman who had always been there for her and who she looked up to, but Rachel had selfishly just wanted time to herself but now she felt bad about not letting her come.

Rachel rushed around the supermarket as quickly as she could. She wasn't thinking properly and by the time she was packing the car up she was sure she didn't buy anything to make a complete meal despite how much she'd bought.

Once she pulled onto the drive she didn't bother to bring the shopping in, but instead rushed straight into the house.

"Chris please can you bring the shopping in for me?"

"Yeah sure" Chris said coming out to the kitchen

"Where's Ruby?"

"Up in her room, all the kids are I haven't seen any of them since you left"

Rachel went straight up to Ruby's bedroom but she wasn't in there so she went onto the landing and started calling her name but there was no reply.

Rachel looked everywhere, in the bathroom, in her bedroom, and then in all of the rooms in the house but Ruby was nowhere to be seen.

She even checked the garden and the garage but Ruby had gone.

Tears started prickling Rachel's eyes. How could she possibly of lost her five year old, innocent little niece?

Everyone had heard Rachel frantically looking for Ruby so had come downstairs to see what was going on.

"Mum what's wrong?" Amy said when she saw her Mum was crying

"Ruby's gone, have- have you seen her?"

"No I thought she was in her room"

"Well she's not anymore, I can't find her anywhere. We need to go and find her Chris, she must have left the house"

"Rachel you need to calm down" Chris said, it was so unusual for Rachel not to seem in control of a situation

"Calm down, how the hell am I supposed to calm down when Ruby is out on her own, it's pouring down with rain, it's misty, it's cold. I don't even know why I'm standing around here talking about it, I should be out looking for her"

"Rachel why don't you wait here in case she comes back, I'll go"

"Wait around here doing nothing while my niece freezes to death"

"I was only trying to help"

The kids can all wait here in case she comes back, we'll both take out cars and look for her Chris"

"I'm coming too Rach"

"No Phil, you wait here"

"You can't make me, she's my sister"

"Okay well you go with Chris then"

Rachel picked up her keys and ran out to the car desperate to find her niece.

Ruby was still walking, but she was freezing. She was shivering all over and she was tired and she just wanted to be in the warm.

She also wanted to be giving her Auntie a big cuddle but she knew she would never get the chance to do that again.

Ruby had been out for about an hour now but she couldn't walk any further so she sat down on a bench. She pulled her teddy out of her bag and sat there cuddling it.

She was sat there with tears rolling down her cheeks when a lady came and sat by her. She looked kind of familiar to Ruby but she couldn't think where she knew her from.

"Ruby is that you?" Steph asked but Ruby didn't say anything

"My name's Steph I think I work with your Auntie Rachel, do you remember me?" Steph said but again Ruby didn't say anything, she wasn't even acknowledging that Steph was speaking

Steph was sure that it was Rachel's niece so got her phone out of her bag to call Rachel.

Rachel had been driving around for ages, but it was so hard to look for her when it was so misty.

Suddenly Rachel heard her phone ringing, however when she looked at the screen she saw it was Steph who was calling, really not who she was hoping.

"Steph this really isn't a good time"

"Rachel I think I've found your niece sat on a bench, but I can't be sure it is her because she won't speak a word to me"

"Steph where are you?"

"I'm on the bench outside Rochdale station"

"Wait there Steph, I'm coming to you"

Rachel drove as quicly as she could and parked the car up.

She got out of the car and ran over to her niece.

When Ruby saw her Auntie coming she tried to rub away, but Rachel grabbed the little girl and held her against her chest.

Tears were falling down both of their faces.

"Ruby what were you thinking? Do you know how worried I've been?" Rachel said but she didn't have the slightest hint of anger in her voice

"Are you going to be OK Rachel? It's just I'm going to miss my train in a minute"

"You go Steph, thank you so much for finding her"

Rachel realised how much Ruby was shivering so took her straight back to the car.

Ruby had become quite lethargic by this point so wasn't trying to escape anymore.

Rachel had some all of their swimming stuff in the boot from yesterday still so quickly got some towels out before getting into the back of the car with Ruby.

She got Ruby out of all of her sodden clothes and wrapped the towels around her. Ruby was freezing so Rachel knew she really needed to get her warm.

Rachel stayed there for a good 10 minutes cuddling her niece, who had now fallen fast asleep but she knew she needed to get home with Ruby so she strapped her niece in and drove home, calling Chris on the way.

When they got there Rachel lifted Ruby in and carried her inside, by which point she'd woken up.

As soon as the others heard Rachel and Ruby come in they all rushed over and crowded them.

Ruby didn't want to see any of them though so buried her head in Rachel's chest and started crying.

Amy had run a bath ready for when they got back so Rachel took her straight up.

Amy, Chloe and Ellie all followed them up as they were worried about their cousin.

Rachel put Ruby down in the bathroom and then turned around to face her three daughters.

"Just give us a bit of space" Rachel said before closing the bathroom door

She then turned her attention back to Ruby

Rachel took the towels off her and helped her into the bath. She decided to wait until after her bath to bring up anything that had just happened.

Ruby laid in the bath silently. She'd stopped crying now but she couldn't understand why Rachel was being so nice to her.

She was so happy to be back here now, she felt so much more safe and secure.

Rachel let her have a soak before getting a jug and pouring water all over her hair making it wet.

Rachel then put the shampoo on and started massaging it into Ruby's hair.

She did this for five minutes, hoping it would relax and calm Ruby, before filling the jug up again to rinse the shampoo off.

Rachel put the conditioner on and then rinsed it off with the shower.

"Right let's get you out"

Rachel held up a fluffy white towel and wrapped it around Ruby before lifting her out.

Once Rachel had her sorted in pyjamas with dry hair she filled up a hot water bottle for her and then Rachel brought Ruby into her room.

"Ruby I think we need to have a little chat about why you ran away. Were you just upset about Mummy?"

Ruby nodded her head.

"I know you're missing her, but we all are, you should have just come and spoken to me about it and I would hope that I could've helped you to feel better"

"But you don't understand" Ruby mumbled

"What don't I understand love?"

"You're going to hate me"

"Hey what are you talking about? How could I ever hate you?"

"Because it's my fault that Mummy died"

"Where on earth have you got that idea from?"

"My wish came true"

"What wish?"

"When I blew out my candles on my Birthday cake I wished that I could live with you instead of Mummy, and my wish has come true because Mummy died which means I'll have to live with you" Ruby said before bursting into tears

Rachel lifted the little girl onto her lap and rubbed her back while she cried.

"Don't you ever blame yourself my love, your Mum's death was just a very bad accident. Of course it's not your fault, you've done nothing wrong darling, absolutely nothing"

"I thought that everyone was going to blame me so I just thought it would be easier if I left"

Hearing Ruby saying all of these things was bringing tears to Rachel's eyes again.

"Of course it wouldn't be, do you have any idea how worried I was when I couldn't find you? Because I love you so much Ruby and nothing you ever do will make me hate you. There's nothing you could ever do that would make me want you to leave. This is your home now Ruby"

"So you really don't think it's my fault that Mummy died?"

"I really don't, no"

Rachel held Ruby while she cried.

"That's it darling, you have a good cry let it all out" Rachel said crying quite a bit herself now too

Ruby ended up crying so much that she cried herself to sleep.

Rachel put her under the quilt before quietly going out.

She went into the bathroom and closed the door behind her.

Her eyes were all red and puffy from crying so much, so she washed her face before going downstairs knowing everyone would be worrying about Ruby.

"Rach is Ruby okay?" Phil asked

"Yes she's fine now"

"Why did she run away?"

"She thought it was her fault your Mum died"

"How could she think it was her fault?"

"She made a wish on her Birthday that she could come and live with me, and she thought her wish had come true because of your Mum dying"

"How could she think that, it's obviously Mum's fault being so irresponsible as usual" Phil said getting angry

Phil left and went up to his bedroom so Rachel tried to go after him.

"Just leave him for a bit Rach" Chris said placing his hand on Rachel's arm reassuringly

Rachel sat down on the sofa, she knew how much everyone was hurting but she just didn't know what she could do to help them which she hated.

Chloe was sat on one of the chairs staring out of the window distantly.

Rachel had been so caught up in how Ruby and Phil must be feeling after loosing their Mum that she'd kind of forgotten about the fact her daughter's had lost an Auntie.

Chloe had always been really close to Mel, she probably had the best relationship with her Auntie out of the three girls.

After seeing tears forming in Chloe's eyes Rachel rushed over and sat down by her daughter and put her arm around her.

Chloe was trying really hard not to let the tears fall from her eyes.

"You can cry, it's okay" Rachel said causing Chloe to let all the tears spill down her cheeks

"It doesn't seem real Mum, if I'd have known Saturday was going to be the last time I'd see her then I would've at least given a proper hug. I barely even said goodbye, one minute she was there dropping Ruby and Phil off and the next minute she was gone"

"I know my love, I know. I didn't exactly end on great terms with Mel, so yes if I could I would do things differently as well. But we can't think like this, it will only make it harder. You've got some amazing memories with Mel, so just hold onto them"

"I know. Will Ruby even be able to remember Mel when she's get older?"

"Hopefully a bit, but I honestly don't know. The memories that she has will probably end up being extremely distant"

"I couldn't imagine having to grow up without a Mum, without you"

"Well I hope you never have to darling"

Rachel gave her daughter a big cuddle before going up to check on Phil.

She went up to his bedroom and knocked on the door.

"Yeah" Phil shouted so Rachel walked in

When she walked in Phil was lying on his bed looking up to the ceiling.

"Philip I know things must be difficult for you at the minute" Rachel said closing the door behind her "but just remember you've still got me, you've still got all of us"

"So we're staying here permanantly now are you?"

"That's what your Mum said she wanted if ever anything were to happen to her"

"I'm surprised she even thought about us" Philip said sounding quite bitter

"Oh Phil, your Mum loved you so much you know she did"

"Well maybe she could have tried to be there a bit more. After she started at Waterloo Road I thought she'd finally come to her senses and was actually starting to become a good Mum. Not that it mattered for me, but Ruby's only 5 she needed her Mum"

"So what changed?"

"She met Mark, a rich man comes along and yet again gets put before her own children"

"Oh Phil, why didn't you talk to me about any of this? You are one for bottling things up aren't you?"

"I didn't want to burden you anymore"

"You never have been a burden Phil, and you never will be for that matter"

Rachel did feel sorry for Philip, as much as Mel had always loved him she hadn't always been there for him.

As a little boy Phil had spent a lot of time around his Auntie's house, but as he got older when his Mum wasn't there he just learned to look after himself, and then Ruby too once she was born.

"Maybe now Ruby can have a proper childhood, rather than the crap one Mum was giving her" Phil blurted out now crying

Rachel always found it hard to comfort Phil, he wasn't one for opening up but she put her arm around him and tried her best to calm him down.

She stayed with him for quite a while but in the end she figured he just wanted a bit of time to himself.

Rachel went into her bedroom to check on Ruby but when she got in there she saw Ruby wasn't in bed however then she saw the door to her en suite was closed so presumed she must be in there.

Rachel waited on the bed and a few minutes later she heard the flush and then Ruby walked out.

"Hey love did you have a good sleep?"

"Yes thank you but now I have a tummy ache"

"I reckon you need to have something to eat" Rachel said as Ruby had barely eaten a thing since finding out about her Mum, not that Rachel had either "I think we both do"

"But my tummy hurts"

"I know but it's probably because you're hungry. I was going to make a pasta bake, does that sound alright?"

Ruby nodded so Rachel quickly made her bed up before going downstairs with Ruby.

Oncce Rachel got Ruby settled watching a film on the sofa with Amy she went into the kitchen and made a start with tea.

She needed to get everyone back into a routine and she planned to start to do this by giving them proper meals.

Chris came out and gave her a hand with tea and once it was ready she called everyone through to the kitchen.

Everyone was quite quiet through tea but Rachel was pleased to see that Ruby managed to eat all of the pasta on her plate. Rachel hadn't given her a lot as she didn't want to overwhelm her but she was glad that she'd managed to eat it all.

After tea Chris said he would clear up so Rachel took Ruby back upstairs and got her to bed as she was still shattered, which was understandable because she'd hardly slept the night before.

"Auntie Rachel please can I sleep in with you tonight?" Ruby asked sweetly

"I think you'd be comfier in your own bed wouldn't you? Rather than in the middle of Uncle Chris" Rachel said, she knew there was room in their king size bed but she didn't really want Ruby to get into the habit of sleeping in with them

"But I don't want to sleep on my own" Ruby said with tears in her eyes

"You'll be fine, and I'm just next door, come on jump into bed"

Ruby bit her bottom lip to stop herself from crying and did as Rachel said and got into bed.

"If you want me don't be afraid to come and find me"

"Good night Auntie Rachel" Ruby said turning over so she wasn't facing her Auntie

"Good night my love, sleep well, I love you lots"

Rachel sat with her for a bit and then gave her a kiss before going out.

As soon as Rachel left Ruby burst into tears. She didn't like being in here on her own, she just wanted to cuddle up with her Auntie.

Rachel went downstairs ready to have a relaxing evening.

Ruby hated being upstairs all on her own. She couldn't stop thinking about her Mum. Even though Rachel had made her realise it wasn't her fault that her Mum had died, she was still really missing her and felt really sad that she was never going to see her again.

Ruby kept crying and ended up getting herself into a real state.

Ellie was just passing Ruby's bedroom when she heard her crying. She stuck her head around the door and saw how upset her cousin was but she didn't really know what to say to her to make her feel better so decided to just go down and tell Rachel.

"Mum Ruby's really upset"

Rachel went straight upstairs to see Ruby. Her heart melted when she saw her niece crying her eyes out.

Ruby was crying so much she could hardly breathe.

"Take some nice deep breaths for me sweetheart, in and out, in and out" Rachel said while rubbing Ruby's back

"Good girl" Rachel said as Ruby started taking deep breaths

Suddenly Ruby started to feel unwell and finished up being sick all over Rachel's top and her bed.

Ruby felt so embarrassed for doing this.

"I'm really sorry"

"It's fine darling, don't worry about it"

Ruby was really upset and clearly needed a cuddle so Rachel took her dirty top straight off and then pulled Ruby into her chest where she continued to cry.

Amy had been worried about Ruby too so came up to check on her.

"Mum is she okay?"

"She will be, can you jus strip this bed for me and put it in the wash love?"

"Yeah sure"

"Thank you"

Rachel picked Ruby up and carried her through to the bathroom.

She gave her a little wash and brushed her teeth but she was still crying loads so Rachel sat down on the toilet seat and rocked back and forth with Ruby in her arms.

"Don't cry my little love, everything's going to be okay in the end"

"I- I don't want to sleep on- on my own" Ruby cried struggling to get her words out

"Okay you can sleep in with me then just for tonight"

Eventually Rachel got Ruby to calm down so went and put her in her bed.

"I'm just going to put my pyjamas on"

Rachel got changed into her pyjamas and then climbed into bed beside Ruby and stayed with her until she drifted off to sleep.

For now she looked reasonably peaceful, but Rachel knew she was going to have a very upset girl on her hands over the next few weeks.

Please review xxxx