The unusually cold LA night wind blew past Tori as she was walking aimlessly through the street. Tears ran down her cheeks without any resistance. She didn't care if she was crying. She didn't care if the whole world would see her do so. All that she could think about is how the worst thing that could have happened had happened two hours ago. She knew that Jade had a hard time trusting anyone, and yet she decided to tell Jade everything, including that she had seen her memories on purpose. She knew that she could have just kept silent on what was going on, but she couldn't keep it a secret from her anymore. Jade had helped her in every way possible ever since the camping trip. She had been there for her at all times. She couldn't have just kept silent after all that.
She could have lied about the last part. She could have said that she had no control over it. She could have said that she had never wanted to see those memories. She could have said that she didn't tell Jade before because she herself barely believed what was going on. Jade would have understood, or at least she wouldn't have reacted that way. But she couldn't lie to her. She wouldn't. Jade had been nothing but honest with Tori. Everything Jade decided to tell Tori was the truth. Tori had seen it clearly herself. How could she have repaid her honesty with lies? How was she supposed to lie and then look her in the eyes later?
Tori shook her head as she came to a stop. She took a deep breath that she releases in a shaky exhale. She hugged herself, hoping to calm her body down; to stop it from trembling. It wasn't the cold night that did that to her. It was the fact that she had lost someone she really cared about.
"No matter what I do, you would still care for me, huh." Tori mumbled to herself as she wiped her tears with the back of her hand. She actually believed that when she had heard it. "Looks like I found the exception."
She continued walking, not even nervous for walking through LA late at night by herself. She didn't care if anything was going to happen to her. At the moment, she would welcome it. Someone jumping in front of her, gun aimed, yelling at her to hand over her money. She imagined a chuckle leaving her at the treat. She imagined just walking towards him until he fires. It would all be over then. This nightmare that has been going on for so many weeks now would finally be over. Or maybe she would get stabbed. She would then be on the ground, in pain waiting for enough blood to leave her body until she would fall asleep. It would hurt more and take a while, but what would that be compared to what she had felt recently? And even if nothing happened to her as she was walking home, what was stopping her from taking the gun her father kept in the bedroom under his shirts and ending her misery?
She shook her head again, this time at her thoughts. If only her friends knew what was going through her head right now. They would be worried. She wondered what Jade would say. Last time Tori's mind went this far, Jade slapped some sense into her. But now, she might have been the straw that broke Tori's resistance. She wondered how everybody would react if her imagination became reality. Would they all cry? Would they all raise their fists towards the sky and curse the god they pray to? Would anyone even dare to think for a second that at least her struggle would be over? Did anyone ever think how she felt during all this?
"I'm going crazy." Tori sighed. She wondered where Jade was now. Maybe Jade was searching for her now. Tori turned around, but no car was in sight. Nothing. The streets were empty. Her shoulders began to tremble again. She was crying harder now. Her hisses turned into sobs. Her steps became longer and quicker. She was running now. She didn't know why she was running. She didn't know where she was running. She only knew that she needed to get it out of her system.
A few minutes later her steps slowed down. Her body calmed as she was catching her breath. She leaned on the nearby wall as she began to look around. She finally knew where she was again. She wasn't far from Hollywood Arts now, which means in an hour she should be at home.
She walked down the road and turned left. To her disappointment, the street was again empty. But as she made a few steps, she saw a silhouette that only became clearer as she got closer. It was a girl, wearing something Tori would never put on. The skirt was too short and the top was too tight. The high heeled leather boots that reached to the girl's knees weren't helping either. She wondered how anyone could stand like that outside without a jacket or anything to protect herself from the cold.
And yet as she came closer to the girl, her pace quickened. Her arms uncrossed as she came closer to the girl. She only heard a gasp from a few feet away as the girl turned her back to the half Latina. Tori stopped right in front of the girl, looking at her in disbelief.
"C-Courtney?" She said, hoping that she was wrong; hoping that her eyes were lying to her. Suddenly, everything else that had been a problem vanished. Everything that had bothered her went away that moment. All her mind could do right now is watch and hope that she was wrong. But as the girl turned around, Tori only found it harder to keep her tears back. The smaller blonde girl was standing in front of her, looking both frightened and ashamed.
"W-what are you doing here?" Courntey stuttered, not looking at Tori.
"No. No, this can't be." Tori said, shaking her head. Courtney only looked at her. She tried to speak, but her voice was gone. She couldn't say anything to Tori; no excuse, no explanation. Nothing. She only stood there, looking down at her feat and avoiding the worried eyes of the half Latina who was never supposed to walk down this part of LA.
"Courtney, please tell me that I got the wrong idea." Tori said, still not moving from her spot. Then, a car stopped next to them as the driver rolled the window down.
"Hey, how much for the night?" The man asked. Tori's gaze shot right at him, all her emotions coming up right then.
"I-It's 20 dollars." Courtney said, her voice barely loud enough to be heard.
"Alright. Get in here." The man said as he reached for his wallet.
"What?" Tori gasped, looking at Courtney in disbelief before she turned to the man in the car. "No! You son of a bitch! Get away from her you bastard!" She yelled, walking to the car and leaning to the window.
"Hey, don't talk to me like that!" The old man yelled back, only enraging her more.
"I said get away from her! My dad is a cop! Do you want to meet him, you perverted son of a bitch?" Tori yelled. She saw his eyes widen as his foot pushed the gas pedal and he drove away.
Tori looked at him as the car sped off before looking back at Courtney. She walked towards the smaller blonde and put her hands on her shoulders. She pushed back the vision that wanted to come, not wanting to make the same mistake again.
"Courtney, please. Tell me I'm wrong." Tori pleaded, her voice ready to break. She felt Courtney's shoulders tremble under her grip. She saw tears drop down the smaller girls face as she was confronted.
"P-Please, don't tell anyone. Don't tell my brother. He doesn't know." Courtney pleaded in her shaky voice. Tori pulled her into a hug. Her suspicions came true. She didn't want to believe it, and yet she couldn't deny it, no matter how much she wished she could.
Without saying anything, Tori took off her jacket and wrapped in around the smaller girl. She took Courtney's hands in hers and gently rubbed them in order to warm her up.
"Come on. I know a place nearby." Tori said as she put an arm around the blonde. They walked for a few minutes before Tori lead them into a small place that served breakfast and worked 24/7. Courtney sat down in one of the seats before Tori sat down next to her, not removing the arm that was protectively wrapped around Courtney.
"Do you want something to eat?" Tori asked as she saw the waitress approach them. Tori swore she saw Courtney lips open before she closed them again, as if she was ashamed to say anything. Tori looked towards the waitress and decided to take the initiative.
"I'll have the bacon, eggs and two donuts please. Do you want the same?" She asked as she looked back at Courtney, who only nodded.
"Anything to drink?" The waitress asked.
"I'll have a green tea." Tori said.
"Same." Courtney added.
The waitress nodded and walked back before she returned with to the silent table a few minutes later with the orders. Tori immediately took care of the bill as she didn't want anything else interrupt her. Right now, she wanted her full attention to be at one point, and that was with the girl that was sitting next to her. She wanted to know what was going on. She turned her head to see Courtney leaned on the window, her hands tightly gripping Tori's jacket she had on and looking out of the window. Tori slowly reached and put her hand on Courtney's shoulder.
"Please, talk to me, Courtney. What is going on?" Tori asked. She saw Courtney turn her head and look at her.
"I-I don't have a choice, Tori." Courtney said, looking down at her hands. Tori saw that she was ashamed.
"A choice? What choice? I don't understand." Tori said.
"I have to earn money somehow. That is what I mean." Courtney said.
"Oh my god. Courtney…does anyone force you to do this?" Tori asked, awful ideas filling her mind about what was going on.
"No… No, nobody forces me, it's nothing like that." Courtney said. "I…I can't…" Courtney said, shaking her head as tears began forming in her eyes.
"Hey, I can help you. And if I can't, I'll find someone who can, I swear. But you need to tell me what is going on. Please." Tori pleaded. Courtney took a deep breath before she began talking.
"My brother and I never had it easy, Tori. Dad couldn't keep a job to save his life and our mother could not care enough to even try and find one. We never had much, you know. It's always been a struggle. Sinjin would wear old clothes we got from charities and once he grew out of them I would wear them. We would eat if there was any money for food. If not, we were free to try and get something by ourselves. Go beg or something like that, you know. Somehow, my brother and I both got scholarships for Hollywood Arts. If we hadn't, there's no way we could have afforded a school like that. But dad's drinking finally caught up to him. His liver is in bad shape, and he has to go to the hospital weekly." Courtney explained.
"And you don't have any insurance." Tori said. Courtney only nodded in response.
"We all took jobs to try and even this out. Mom is cleaning toilets in a few clubs in LA. Sinjin is delivering food for some Chinese restaurant. I…I told them that I was a waitress on the other side of town. I know they would never go there. So I… borrowed these clothes from a girl I know and began…working." Courtney said, swallowing her urge to cry in front of the half Latina.
"H-How long have you been doing this?" Tori asked.
"Four months maybe. You… you can't understand… it's a living. It pays the bills. It puts food on the table. What else could I do? I can only work on weekends, and I can't earn such money anywhere else." Courtney explained. Tori only looked at her, stunner at Courtney selflessness.
"And you?" Tori asked.
"Me what?"
"What about you? How much longer can you do this?" Tori asked.
"I can do this as much as I need to. I can do this as long as my father can be helped." Courtney said.
"And how is his therapy going?" Tori asked. Courtney resolve vanished from her face. Her words were stuck in her throat. Tori understood that the answer was not what she hoped it would be.
"It's… going on… He refuses to stop drinking, no matter how much we beg. But I'm…I'm sure he'll get to his senses soon. He has to." Courtney said.
A shaky breath escaped Tori as she heard the last part. The girl in front of her, the sister of one of her friends, was sacrificing herself, her mind, her soul and her sanity, to help a man who doesn't even try to help himself. She felt the urge to find him and grab him by his throat; to slap him until the sense isn't completely beaten into him. But she knew that even if she did that, nothing would change. So she decided to do something else.
"My parents split up a few weeks ago." Tori said.
"Oh. I didn't know." Courtney said, looking back at Tori.
"My mother was cheating on my father, and when she got caught, she just left with the guy. He was my dad's colleague. I think they worked together for almost two decades. I haven't seen her or talked to her for a while now." Tori said.
"I'm sorry to hear that."
"It's okay. She made her choice, and I can't do anything about that. But I can do something else. I'll talk to my dad. I'm sure he knows someone who can help you out." Tori said.
"What? No, you can't tell anyone about this!" Courtney cried, her eyes reading fear at the idea.
"Courtney, listen to me, please…" Tori said as she took Courtney's hands in hers. That moment, a vision rose and broke through Tori's resistance. Despite all her force, she couldn't prevent it as everything went bright in front of her.
"A loud moan was heard as the old, heavy man got off of the small blonde on the bed. She immediately grabbed the covers and put them over herself as he walked over to where his clothes are. Courtney wiped her tears away as he got dressed. He took out his wallet and threw two notes onto the bed.
"Here's ten extra. I'll see your ass next week." He said as a wide grin formed on the edge of his lips.
"Mhm. Thanks." She said as she took the money. He walked out of the room and shut the door behind him. She got up and reached for her clothes. As she put on her panties, she saw the blue mark he had left on her leg. Her lower lip kept trembling as she finished dressing herself and walked out of the apartment. She walked back to her usual spot and waited.
She felt her phone vibrate. She took it out of her pocket and saw that it was a message. The sender name read Eve3.
"Hey, are you okay? How is it going?" the message said.
"Tired. I'm okay. I can't wait to see you." She typed and sent. A few moments later, she got the answer.
"I can't wait either. Stay strong. I love you." She read.
"I love you too." Courtney typed and sent back. She exited the messages in her phone and went to the pictures, opening a picture with her and another girl kissing in front of a decorated Christmas tree."
Tori's senses returned to her, but she couldn't utter a single word. Her eyes focused back to Courtney, who was looking at her, still waiting to hear what Tori wanted to say. Tori squeezed Courtney hands gently, as her lower lip began to tremble. She didn't even try to stop her tears from running. She didn't care that she was again crying. None of them seemed important now.
"You…you have a girlfriend?" Tori asked in a shaky voice. Courtney's eyes grew wide at the question. Her hands stiffened in Tori's as her breathing came to an abrupt halt.
"W-What? H-H-How do you know?" Courtney asked in disbelief.
"Oh my god." Tori said. She saw Courtney's gaze drop. She seemed to shrink right in front of Tori, as her shoulders lowered. She pulled her hands out of Tori's grip back towards her.
"Now you're going to judge me for that too. I can understand. Thank you for the food and for listening to me." Courtney said. To her surprise, she felt two arms grab her shoulders and the next moment she found herself in a hug.
"I won't judge you for anything. You are so selfless. You do all this to help your family and sacrifice so much. You don't think about yourself even once during all this… I'm going to help you. I'm going to do anything I can to help you, I swear to everything that is holy to me. You won't need to do this anymore, I promise you that." Tori said, feeling how Courtney's shoulders began to tremble.
"Nobody will know. Nobody in school will know. I won't tell Sinjin. I won't tell anyone else, I promise. But I need to tell my dad so he can help you. Listen to me. You will come to my place now. I'll give you all the clothes I don't wear anymore. I'll give you everything I don't need." Tori said.
"No. I can't take that." Courtney said.
"Yes, yes Courtney you can. It's time someone finally did something for you. I'm sorry we all made fun of you. I'm sorry we were blind to your and Sinjin's situation. But that changes now. I'm going to help you." Tori said. She took out her phone and called them a cab.
"Tori, I…" Courtney began, but Tori wouldn't let her even try to make her change her mind.
"I won't just sit here and let you continue with what you are doing. You don't deserve that." Tori said. After a few moments, Courtney nodded as she wrapped her hands around Tori.
"Thank you." Courtney said.
"Everything will be fine." Tori said.
The cab arrived and fifteen minutes later they arrived at the Vega residence. Tori paid the cab-driver and unlocked the door. Both walked inside and Courtney's eyes immediately stopped when she saw the piano.
"If you want to you can play something. I'll go get you something to drink." She said.
"Thanks." Courtney said as she walked towards the piano. Tori walked into the kitchen and opened a shelf out of which she took two glasses. She stopped when she heard what Courtney began playing. She recognized the melody from a while back. A smile formed on her lips as she remembered from where she had heard it. She took a bottle of juice out of her fridge and poured it into the glasses before she carried them towards the living room.
"I haven't heard the song for a long time." Tori said as she handed the glass to the small blonde.
"Thanks. You listen to Yann Tiersen?" Courtney asked before she began drinking.
"I do. Amelie is what made me want to learn how to play the piano. If you want to catch some sleep or anything, my room is upstairs. I'm going to call my dad to see where he is." Tori said.
"Thanks. I'll go lie down. I really am tired." Courtney admitted.
"Come. I'll show you where my room is." Tori said as she offered her hand. Courtney took it and Tori led her upstairs to the first room on the left.
"Here. Go and get some sleep. Tomorrow, things will already be better." Tori said.
"Thank you again for helping me." Courtney said.
"You don't have to thank me. I'll be right back." Tori said. She walked into her bathroom and shut the door behind her. She opened the tap and splashed some water on her face. She swore that today was one of the longest days in her life. In a single day, her car broke down, Cat and Robbie got together, she seemed to be on a date with Jade, had a big argument with her and then she found out that one of her colleagues from Hollywood Arts had hit rock bottom a long time ago. Right now, she just wanted to go and fall asleep. She removed her makeup and as she was ready to throw away the dirty remover as she opened the bin when her eyes landed on something. She leaned down to see what it was.
That moment, her eyes grew wide, her jaw dropped and her hands began trembling. She reached into the bin and took out the used pregnancy test as she saw the two red stripes on it.