The walk to Cat's house wasn't a long one, but it felt like forever for the worried Tori. It wasn't even 10 in the morning and the day already seemed too much to handle for both her and her girlfriend. It had to be, since Jade stormed out of her house and drove off, leaving Tori there by herself.
As she approached Cat's house, she saw Cat sitting on the steps of the entrance, leaning her head on her hands. She looked devastated. Tori's pace quickened instantly, a thousand thoughts going through her mind searching for an explanation for her behavior. All were about Jade, and none of them were nice.
"Cat? She said when she was close enough. Cat looked towards her and lowered her head again, wiping her eyes with the lower part of his palm. "Cat, what's wrong? Did something happen?" Tori said, stopping in front of the crying redhead.
"Robbie...He broke up with me." Cat said, shaking her head in disbelief.
"What? When? Why?" Tori asked in the same breath. She was worried sick about Jade, but pushed that worry aside that moment. She knew Jade could take care of herself, and she owed Cat way too much to just leave her now.
"When Andre and Simon brought Helen to show her your locker... I saw some students look towards us in disgust. I don't even know who they are. I think they are younger than us. As Helen was walking away, Robbie oppened his locker and found a sheet of paper. Robbie read it... it took him maybe a minute... and he just looked at me... He looked so.. dissapointed? Angry? I don't know. When I asked him what was wrong he dropped the paper and said that...us getting together was a stupid idea. He just walked off." Cat explained.
"Oh my god." Tori said and sat down next to her friend. She hugged Cat, wondering who these students were. "Do you know what was written on that paper?" Tori asked.
"Names, Tori. Someone wrote down... wrote down the names of guys I've been with. I don't know how they knew, but... Robbie broke up with me because he thinks I'm a slut, Tori. He must have been disgusted when he saw the number and the names." Cat said.
Tori's fists clenched, knuckles white, from anger. Who were those idiots, and why did they have it in for Cat now? At first she wondered if the same students had anything to do with her and Jade's locker, but now she didn't care about that anymore. What she cared about now is that they hurt the one person who never had let her down. Tori could feel her pain, but she didn't need her ability to realize how Cat was feeling.
"Where's Jade?" Cat asked, looking up at her friend.
"We went to her house and told her father and future step mother about us. He took it well. He said everything we could have wished for him to say. Fuck, I wish my parents said just one of those things. But Jade stormed off. She started crying, stormed off and left without me. I hoped I would find her here." Tori explained.
"She didn't come here." Cat said, letting out a long sigh. "Just this morning everything was perfect, but now it's falling apart."
"No. No it's not." Tori said as she got up and took Cat's hands in hers. "Where is Robbie?"
"I don't know. Why?"
"I'll talk to him and get him back to his senses." Tori said.
"But...what about you and Jade?" Cat asked.
"Jade will be fine. She's a warrior, we both know that. But after everything you did for us; after all the hours of listening, mediating between us and then taking us into your home when we couldn't stand to be in our homes anymore, I know Jade would be furrios with me if I didn't help you. And I agree with that." Tori said as she pulled Cat up and into a hug. "Thank you for being the best friend I could have ever asked for; for being there for me and helping me every time I needed help. You are such a wonderful, beautiful human being Cat, and I can tell you without a doubt that I would not be standing here if it hadn't been for you." Tori said, tightening her grip around Cat's body. "Now let me help you." Tori said as she gently kissed the top of Cat's head and pulled away.
"Tori..." Cat barely uttered.
"Everything will be alright. I only need one more favor from you."
"What?"
"I need your car."
"Sure." Cat said as she reached into her pocket and pulled out the keys of her car.
"Thank you." Tori said as she took the keys. "Get in."
"Wait, where are we going?"
"You'll see." Tori said as she and Cat got into the vehicle.
It didn't take Cat long to realize what their destination was, and she felt a dull pain in her sternum when she saw Robbie's house.
"Why did you drive me here?" Cat asked.
"Because you two are perfect for each other." Tori said. "And I'm not going to let some dumbasses from school ruin the best relationship both of you ever had."
"Tori... I understand why he's feeling like that."
"No, don't give me that, Cat. So you slept with someone before you two were together. So what?" Tori asked.
"Tori, if you had seen his face, you would be thinking differently." Cat said, looking down at her hands.
"So you just want to give up on your relationship this easily? This early into it?"
"It's my fault however you put it. I knew he had a crush on me all this time and I never gave him a chance before. I didn't want to jeopardize our friendship, I really didn't. I didn't want to risk losing him. But now? Now I understand that all these years I had the perfect boyfriend so close to me. God, how he must have felt every time he saw me with someone else... Whenever I would tell him of how someone treated me... It's karma. I deserve this. I really do." Cat explained.
"Screw karma, and screw the past. Look who I'm with now. Remember how she used to treat me?" Tori asked. Cat only nodded.
"Do you love him?" Tori asked.
"I do."
"Then fight for both of you. And if you feel guilty, make it up to him. Make him realize that you are worth waiting for, because you are." Tori said.
"It's not that easy." Cat said.
"Alright. I'm going to talk to him then. Maybe I can talk some sense into him then." Tori said and got out of the car while Cat neither moved nor tried to stop her.
Tori walked into the house and upstairs. She opened the door to Robbie's room and found him sitting at his desk, pencil in hand, hand on his board. He turned around to look at her. His expression changed from shock to neutral in a second as he returned to his animating.
Tori walked up next to him, grabbed a chair and sat down. She didn't take her eyes off of him while his eyes seemed to be trying to avoid her.
"You and Cat talked?" Robbie asked, still not looking away from his drawing.
"We did. Now I want to hear your side of it."
"If you talked to her, I have nothing to add." Robbie said.
"But why leave her for that? So what if she slept with guys? Is it such a bad thing? Are we still in the middle ages?" Tori asked. "If that's the case girls should be disgusted every time they saw Beck."
"Is that what she thinks?" Robbie asked.
"Well, yes. She saw the names on the paper. Then you just left, well, you said the two of you getting together was a bad idea and then left." Tori said. Robbie placed his pencil down and finally turned to face Tori.
"I'm not disgusted. I knew of her relationships and hook ups. She and I were friends for a long time after all." Robbie said.
"If you knew, what's the problem? Why would you just leave her then?"
"Because I saw the names and realized something. She can have anyone she wants. People love her, guys love her. She is funny, gentle, nice and the most beautiful girl I've ever seen. She has no reason to be with someone like me. I have nothing to offer to her. I... I don't deserve her." Robbie explained.
"Robbie, that's the dumbest thing I have ever heard in my life." Tori said, her expresion calm.
"What? Why?" Robbie asked.
"I won't yell at you. I won't insult you, no matter how much I want to now. I've done dumb things myself, so I have no right to do that. But what you just said is dumb." Tori said.
"Why is it dumb? Which of my reasons are not correct? Which of my assumptions are false?" Robbie asked.
"All of them but one; Cat can have anyone she wants. And guess what? She did, until you broke it up." Tori said.
"It's not like that..."
"It is. Sure, you made the first step; you approached her with it, and she not only gave you a chance, but chose you as her boyfriend. Despite what your insecurities tell you; despite what those doubts in the back of your head whisper to you; Cat wants you. Why? Because unlike any of those guys on the list, you care about her for all the reasons you named before, not just her looks. You were there after every breakup; you know what they all did to her. You heard it straight from her every time. They either cheated on her, dropped her after an one night stand, ran away the moment it got serious. Hell, one broke up with her because she wasn't blonde. How can you think yourself inferior to those type of guys? You are miles and leagues above them and Cat knows it. Everyone knows it but you, Robbie." Tori finished.
Robbie's knuckles whitened as he clenched his fists. His shoulders began shaking as he dropped his stare towards his lap.
"W-Where is she?" He barely got out.
"Outside, in the car. I brought her here. Now go down and fix what you fucked up." Tori said as she stood up.
Robbie got up and hugged his friend.
"Thank you, Tori. Thank you." Robbie said. She hugged him back.
"I'm always here for you, Robbie. Now go." She said.
Robbie let her go and walked out of his room. She followed him closely downstairs and out of the house. She saw Cat look up and towards her before Robbie opened the passenger side door and wrapped his arms around the girl he loved.
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm an idiot." Tori heard Robbie say.
"It's okay. I understand." Cat said.
"No. No you don't. I don't care how many guys you've been with before. It's nothing you did. It's not you, Cat. It's me." Robbie explained.
"I don't understand." Cat said.
"I'll explain it all to you, and if you can forgive me after that, I want you to take me back. I screwed up one chance, I just need another. Please." Robbie pleaded. Cat only leaned forward and kissed him before hugging him back.
"I forgave you the moment I saw you, Robbie." Cat said. "But I want you to explain to me why you did what you did. I don't want any secrets between us either."
"Good. I agree completely." Robbie said, a smile forming on his face.
"Let's go inside. Tori needs the car." Cat said as she let go of Robbie and got out of her car.
Tori saw it and walked towards the them, happy that at least one couple would get out of their crisis today.
"I'll go and find Jade." Tori said as she stopped in front of the two. Cat hugged her quickly; gratefully and let go.
"Do you know where she is?" Cat asked.
"I have a good idea where she might be." Tori said.
"Good luck." Cat said.
"Thank you. I'll see you guys tommorow." Tori said and got into the car, reversed out and drove off towards the one place she hoped to find her girlfriend.
Half an hour later, she parked her car on the near empty parking lot near the ocean. She felt relief when she saw Jade's car parked on it. She locked Cat's car and hurried down the concrete steps before her soles met the sand.
As she walked towards the beachhouse, she saw someone sit on the wooden steps of it's porch. Jade was gazing towards the horizon, past the ocean. Her eyes were red, her eyeliner had drawn dark lines on her cheek. Her jacket was lying on the sand next to the steps as her fingertips gently traced on her forearm.
Just as Tori was a few feet away, Jade noticed her. She seemed to snap back from whatever trance she seemed to be in. She opened her mouth to say something, but shut it a few moments later.
Tori sat down next to her on the steps and looked at the familiar scars on the Goth's forearms.
"My first impression of your dad was a complete miss, I'll admit." Tori said, looking at the ocean. "He was exactly the opposite of what I envisioned him to be. And my paretns where the opposite of what I thought them to be all this time." Tori said with a chuckle. "I wish they had said at least one of the things he said."
"I'm sorry I just ran off; I'm sorry I left you there. It was too much for me." Jade said, her voice small and filled with guilt.
"Don't be. I understand why you did what you did. You know I ran off the night my mother left us?" Tori said.
"Ran off where?" Jade asked.
"Nowhere really. I just climbed out of my window and ran off. I just walked somewhere all night. I didn't think, I didn't cry, nothing. It was an autopilot that was set to get out of the house and stay away from it. And I did for a few nights. Showered and changed clothes, maybe, but the rest I would just wander around." Tori explained.
"I guess we both know what it means to be shocked by someone we thought we knew." Jade said, looking down at her scars again. "I used to be proud of these, you know. But now, I'm not sure if they mean what I thought they mean anymore." Jade said.
"I don't understand."
"I thought I had everything figured out rather well. My parents, my relationships, my friends, myself... But in the last few weeks, I've ended up being wrong about all of them. My father is more understanding than I ever imagined, I'm dating a girl I so tried to hate at first, Cat isn't dating a Jerk and Robbie grew a spine, Andre beat Beck up, Beck has anger issues, Hollywood Arts is filled with homophobes... And don't get me started about you. You've broken down every resistance I tried to put up against you. Here I am, crying next to you without feeling ashamed, telling you that I love you and how much you mean to me without an ounce of a doubt... I was wrong about a lot of things. And now that I understand that, I regret these. What if I missunderstood something that happened; someone's intentions, words, actions... and did this instead of looking at it from all sides and perspectives? Now they just remind me of my own mistakes."
"We all make mistakes. It's okay to make them. But holding on to them does nothing for anyone." Tori said.
"I agree. But it's kinda difficult for me to let go when I now get reminded of them." Jade said with a sigh. "They don't show me that I endured worse, really. They show me how wrong I was at a moment and how I couldn't handle it. I made sure to remind miself of it for ever." Jade said.
Something happened inside of Tori's mind that moment. Like an instinct, she put her hands on Jade's forearms.
"What are you doing?" Jade asked, looking at her girlfriend, but the half Latina was too focused to answer.
Jade felt the warmth from Tori's palms increase. She could see a light, barely visible blue light emanate from under Tori's palms. And as quickly as it startet, it ended. Tori removed her hands. Jade looked at her arms.
"H-How did you do that?" Jade asked, searching for the scars she had just a moment ago before she looked at her girlfriend, who was breathing heavily. Tori fell into Jade's arms, sweat running down her forehead. "Tori? Tori, are you ok?" Jade asked, holding on to the other girl.
"Just...tired..." Tori said, closing her eyes.
Jade put her hand on the back of Tori's head to keep it up. She hugged her tightly, desperately trying to understand what just happened and what it did to her girlfriend.
"Tori, stay with me, please." Jade begged.
"Don't worry." Tori said, her breathing evening out slowly. "I'll be fine. I just need some rest."
"What did you do?"
"I don't know. It just felt right to do." Tori said as she took a deep breath in and raised her arm to hug Jade around the neck. "You can start over now. And I hope you start over with me." Tori said.
"You are fucking right it's going to be with you." Jade said, hugging her tightly as the ocean kept moving as always. "Let's go inside. You need some rest."
"Okay. Just...help me up." Tori said.
"I got you one better." Jade said as she picked up Tori.
"Thank you." Tori said as she rested her head on Jade's shoulder.
"No, Tori. Thank you."