Episode 3: Access Denied

It's been a week since Selphie started her cult and I can think of ten better places to be at the moment then being in this stuffy club room. So far, Kairi has had to skip one of her own club meetings, but the redhead was very optimistic about Selphie's club. Sora was another person who saw that the glass was half full and fully supported being here. I'm the only one who thinks this is a horrible idea and that the glass is empty and going to fall off the edge of the table and shatter because that's how pessimistic I feel about the future of this club. I don't know what Fran thinks since she just sits there and knits and doesn't really say anything, which brings me to question if the bunny girl ever leaves the club room in the first place.

"Riku, pay attention!" Selphie snapped, slapping a ruler on the table to get my attention. I scowled at her like a child being chided by his mother.

"Anyway," she started, ignoring my sour face. "I'd like to introduce our club's newest equipment!" She went into her messenger bag and produced a laptop.

Everyone with the exception of Fran looked impressed and went to stand around her. I was the only one who looked at the computer with any ounce of suspicion as she set it up and turned it on.

"Selphie, why do we even need a laptop?" I asked, bringing my chair over to see.

"We obvious need this laptop to generate interest in our club Riku," she said, rolling her eyes, as if that were the most obvious answer in the world. "We need to spread the word of Selphie-ism online! So it's your job to make us a really cool website."

"Wait? Why me?" At this point, I shouldn't be surprised that I was giving the job of making our website since I've practically done everything necessary to get this club started.

"Because you're the only one who knows how." Okay, I can buy that. Sora and computers don't really mix since he'll just keyblade it to dust and as much of a nerd Kairi is, I doubt she has the patience to fool around with photoshop.

"So, where'd you get it?" Sora asked as I took control of the laptop. It seemed very advanced as it had the latest updates and programs. It must've cost a fortune.

"The computer club, obviously," Selphie replied, snorting.

I stopped fiddling with the latest version of photoshop to look at her.

"How?" I asked, suspiciously.

The brunette merely shook her head, "Don't worry about it. I got the laptop, that's what matters."

Which translates to 'I stole it' in Selphie's mother tongue. There was no sense in arguing with her since it'll result in another shouting match between us. It's been a week since this club has started and I'm the only one willing to bump heads with her on anything. Kairi just smiles and nods and Sora is basically on board with everything she says, which makes me question if the boy is seriously crushing on her or something. Fran just sits there and knits so I can't really call her an ally as she refuses to admit that she finds me attractive (She's gonna be all over me one of these days, I swear.)

"Okay, with you working on our website, the rest of us can see if we have any requests."

She snapped her fingers towards Sora who went and got the request box. What was he? Her puppy? I frowned and continued to explore what was on the laptop, completely uninterested in whatever else she had planned.

I heard the metal clank of the box's top against the surface of the desk as Sora looked inside of it. "There's nothing in it," he said, pouting.

"What!?" Selphie stood up, snatching the box from Sora. "What do you mean there's nothing there!" She turned the box upside down and shook it to make sure that its contents were spilled out. But her actions revealed what Sora only confirmed a few minutes ago, nothing.

"This is ridiculous!" She dropped the box and fell back into her seat. "And after Kairi and I worked so hard to advertise last week!"

I rolled my eyes.

"Um, I don't think the principal appreciated the two of you skipping around handing out pamphlets in bikinis."

Selphie glared at me. "Hey, it got us attention!"

I looked up from the computer to throw her a dirty look. "Of the wrong kind Selphie!"

Because having the principal himself run out of his office to chase down two bikini clad students is good attention. It didn't help that by the time Sora and I showed up to help, Selphie was being carried away by said principal, screaming at the top of her lungs that he was not her friend and that no, she does not want to go inside his office, no matter how much candy he had, helped give a good impression. Suffice to say, the principal is being investigated by the police on child molestation.

"Maybe we should try a different approach, like having a bake sale that has the club's logo on the cookies." Kairi said, trying to stop us from yet another shouting match.

"We can't do that! They'll just eat and never come," Selphie whined.

She stood up from her seat, her face dark. Now when Selphie gets that look on her face, the one where her eyes darken and her mouth twitches into something evil, something sinister is about to begin. I tensed in my seat since I'm usually the default victim for all of her abuse. "This is a state of emergency and I'm afraid we're going to have to break out the big guns," she said, placing her hands on her hips.

Sora looked at her with a confused pout on his face. "What guns?"

"Those guns," she said, pointing towards Kairi's chest.

My eyes widened when she tackled the redhead to the floor. I shot up from my seat to intervene. Selphie was trying to pry Kairi's fingers off the redhead's blouse.

"Selphie what do you think you're doing!" I growled, grabbing her by the shoulders, trying to get her off of Kairi, whose eyes were screwed shut as she held onto her own shirt of dear life.

"Seeing the goods!" she reasoned, trying again to pop some buttons off of Kairi's blouse. "We all know that Kairi has a bigger chest than me! Admit it, look at it!"

And as if seeing wasn't believing she shoved my face into the unfortunate girl's chest, which was finally exposed to reveal a lacy black bra with pink trimming. My face quickly heated up as it made contact with Kairi's soft supple breasts and the girl squealed, trying to push my head away. I mentally grunted. Fine, they were bigger than Selphie's, but that didn't mean the maniac had to make me intimate with them on a face to breast basis! I gathered what ever strength I could (because really, Kairi smelled really nice and her breasts were really soft) and stood up, holding my nose in the hopes that it wasn't bleeding.

"Why did you do that for?" I roared, my face flushed with heated embarrassment.

Selphie glared at me as she stood up to join me, abandoning a whimpering Kairi to cover herself.

"I was merely showing you how plentiful her bosoms were!" she shouted at me.

Sora stood up from his seat to meekly butt into our argument.

"Guys…"

"That was grossly inappropriate!" I yelled, ignoring Sora's lame attempt at trying to calm us down.

"Hey, guys—"

"No it wasn't!" Selphie roared, equally ignoring him. "We're amongst friends! It's not like we haven't seen each other naked before."

"That's because we haven't seen each other naked!"

Selphie stopped to think for a moment. "You know what, you're right." She giggled. "It's only me who likes to peek into the boy's locker-" I looked at her with my eyes wide and she cleared her throat once she noticed she went off on a tangent. "ANYWAYS!" She continued, "We can sell sexy pictures of Kairi and get awareness!"

"Hey guys!"

"We are not prostituting Kairi!"

Fran had already gotten up from her seat to give the redhead her light sweater to cover herself up.

"It's not prostitution!" Selphie shouted back trying to reason.

"Is too!" I yelled, stomping my foot to mean that I was pissed off and wasn't going to let her get away with embarrassing one of my best friends.

"Is not!" she stomped back.

"Is too!"

"Is not!"

"YOU GUYS! SHUT THE HELL UP!" Sora roared over us. Everyone went silent, turning their heads to look at the red faced brunet who looked angry enough to keyblade us to death. Even Fran, who seemed to have the complete emotional characteristics of a tic-tac, looked up in amazement from her position next to Kairi.

Sora calmed down, clearing his throat as he straightened up his tie. "Thank you," he said, more composed. "There's another alternative to get more members and requests. There's a club fair next week."'

Selphie cheered up at the statement and quickly went to Sora's side. "That's it! We'll get a booth at the club fair and get more people to join or request something!"

I snorted, going to help both Kairi and Fran up from the floor. Only my eyes seemed to wander straight towards Kairi's chest when I went to help her up. I diverted my eyes to look somewhere else, despite the slight blush on my cheeks. I went and stood by Fran, the obvious Mary Sue, since I felt nervous around Kairi.

"Sora, I could kiss you!" Selphie smiled, pinching the boy's cheek. "But I won't since I don't want to make you know who…" and she obviously pointed to me. "…feel left out," she whispered, winking. I rolled my eyes, because even if she were giving out kisses, I wouldn't want her poisonous lips on mine.

"We'll blow the other clubs away! Our booth is gonna rock!"

She then took a bored looking Fran and a stunned Kairi and started talking a mile a minute about her ideas for our booth. I glared at Sora for giving her yet another idea and he just laughed uneasily, scratching the back of his head. I stood there with a brooding scowl because that's what I do most of the time Selphie manages to get her way.

"Riku! I don't see you working on that website!"

I sighed and went back to mess around with the computer. Why couldn't a stray lighting bolt strike me dead?

"I am devastated! Simply and utterly devastated!" Selphie dramatically whined, posing on top of table where Sora and I were having our lunch. No one on the cafeteria grounds seemed to notice or care about her elaborate performance.

I swallowed the bit of sandwich that I'd been chewing and pondered for a bit.

"So, let me get this straight," I started, putting my sandwich down. "You're…devastated?"

That earned me a fierce glare from her, which amused me a little. Selphie did not like my cock-sure smirk and resorted to stealing my sandwich and taking a huge bite out of it in revenge for mocking her. I frowned as she chewed.

"What's wrong?" Sora asked, touching her shoulder, looking genuinely concerned. I snorted and crossed my arms over my chest. Only Sora would be naïve enough to buy into Selphie's dramatics. Selphie, seeing that Sora had taken the bait, shoved me over to sit next to him. I scowled, growing more and more annoyed by her.

"We can't be in the club fair!" She cried, hysterically. Sora's features went from a sympathetic pout to an over protective scowl.

"What? Why?"

"Because we're not apparently an 'official' club yet. What does that mean?" She grabbed onto Sora, nuzzling into his neck as she continued to cry. "I thought club fairs were about getting people to join!" Sora patted the sobbing girls back affectionately.

"There, there, calm down," he said, in a soothing voice. He looked up to me for help and I just rolled my eyes. He obviously needed a reality check if he thought I was going to help. Instead of offering my own comforting words, I sat there watching her elaborate performance with a bored expression on my face. Sora actually glared at me when I choked down a laugh when Selphie started hiccupping.

"That doesn't make sense," Sora said, his voice sounding at bit more peeve because of my lack of sensitivity. "Maybe you should try again."

Selphie pulled back, sniffling back snot. Gross.

"Can't you do anything Sora since you're on student government?" She asked, rubbing her eyes. Sora chewed on his lip, as he thought and looked at me for support. I, again, didn't want to be involved and raised my hands up, absolving myself from the situation.

"I'm sorry, but I have no authority over whose club gets to be in the fair, that's up to the director of the student board of activities," he lamented.

Selphie frowned, sobering up and drying up her fake tears. "Then why the hell am I crying on you for!" She snorted, quickly standing up and walking away, angry that she probably wasted her time.

Sora blinked. Shocked by the complete one-eighty Selphie just pulled on him. I started chewing on the end of my straw, amused by his confusion.

"What just happened?" he asked, tilting his head to the side as if examining the situation.

"You just got used," I said, nonchalantly.

Sora shrugged. "Hn. It wasn't very exciting," he said, taking a bite out of his lunch.

I leaned on my elbows, my hands cupping my head.

"Just be happy she didn't use you and throw you out like some used Kleenex like she does me."

Sora laughed and I smirked, shaking my head as I went back to chewing on my straw. It was then that I realized this moment became one of those rare occasions where I actually felt happy. Where putting a smile on Sora's face was enough to make my day and the fact that he was the only person willing to try to understand me, made staying on this floating rock of an island more bearable. I felt at ease around him, which is not how I feel when I'm around Selphie. Little did I know that this sense of comfort and safety would soon morph into a foreboding sense of danger and fear later on in the day.

I was happily minding my own business, staring out the window watching the girls blitzball team practice when I sensed the air around me drop a couple of degrees. I saw the devil in carnet from my peripheral vision and decided that if I don't give her the attention she would eventually rape from me later, there would be hell to pay. My chair fell forward from the lazy reclined position I had it in earlier as I turned my neck to face her.

She leaned forward on the back of her chair and smiled. "I found out how we can get in the club fair," She said, without skipping a beat. I looked into her bright green eyes, and licked my lips gearing up to put my game face on. Only when I opened my mouth I didn't expect for my brain to come out with a question rather than a snarky comment.

"How?"

"Well, there's a girl, Maria, who is in charge of deciding which clubs get to go on. I figure that if I talk to her, then our application won't get denied."

I crossed my arms over my chest, raising an eyebrow.

"And how pray tell are we going to talk to her? Wouldn't a person like that be busy since the fair is next week?"

"Well," Selphie chewed her bottom lip, "I was kind of hoping that you would play a part in it, like in seducing her."

My eyes widened. I'll admit that girls find me attractive enough to want to go out with me, but me seducing a girl? I could barely flirt my way out of paper bag, let alone flirt with a girl! I know a guy my age should have a healthy libido when it comes to the ladies and should be able to get a date no problem, but I've been pretty busy these last few years fighting heartless and the war against the organization. I mean, how can a guy adequately pick up a girl when his entire being is consumed by the darkness?

My face hardened as I gave her my reply. "I am not going to seduce her."

Selphie sighed rolling her eyes. "Fine then, how about strongly encouraging her with your lips?"

"Rephrasing it will not make it better!"

"Oh come on," She said, leaning forward, smiling. "I'm sure girls find you…" She thought for a second, looking up, "Oh what's the word," she chewed on her lip in concentration. "Hot! Yeah, that's it." I rolled my eyes and sighed, wanting to be anywhere or anyone for that matter.

"Girls find your dead personality…hot."

"I do not have a dead personality!"

"And that's what he said," Selphie said, giggling.

"That doesn't even apply to that phrase!"

The perky girl laughed. "I know, I just wanted to say it since it makes anything you say dirty."

I could feel a headache start to form inside the walls of my skull. "Selphie, is there a point to this conversation?" I asked, rubbing the bridge of my nose, wishing for a brain aneurism to render me deaf and blind.

"Oh yes." And before I could react, she had me by the tie. "We're going to meet Maria right now!" And like a true cave woman, she dragged me out of the classroom as if I were her mate.

By the time we got to the cafeteria ground, my face was a nice shade of purple. When she let me go, I managed to take off the offending choking device and put the tie in my pocket. Selphie then pulled me over to hide with her behind the wall parallel to the window.

"Okay, that's her over there," she whispered, as if the entire thing were a mission. I dusted myself off and peered outside the curve of the wall. At the farthest table in the back was a group of girls laughing and talking while eating their lunch. The girl all the others were surrounding, the one with the fair skin, the dark hair up in pigtails wearing red rim glasses was Maria.

Selphie pushed me forward from our hiding spot behind the wall.

"Now go over there and make me proud."

I turned around quickly. "Aren't you coming with me?" I asked, taking her wrist and pulling her forward.

She pulled her wrist back.

"Why?"

"Because it's your club," I seethed.

"It's our club" she corrected, placing her hands on her hips. "It would be awkward with you flirting with her and me standing there. I'll feel like your pimp or something."

I rolled my eyes because it was probably true.

"Plus, I don't want to give off the wrong impression that I'm making you do this."

"But you are!"

"Stop complaining and go!" she yelled, pushing me. I scowled and stomped my way through the grounds. When I got up to the table, Maria and her friends quickly stopped talking. They all looked at me, their eyes studying their prey. I felt my body tingle with nerves as I started to panic. I swallowed thickly and cleared my throat.

Maria twirled her black braid around her finger, studying me with an amused smirk on her face. "Um. Can I help you?" she asked.

I looked over my shoulder to see Selphie in the distance. She mouthed to me to smile and I craned my neck back, teeth clenched in an awkward smile. Maria's friends giggled.

"Well I was wondering…" The girls looked on, each sporting a mischievous grin as if hoping that I would ask their friend out. Maria only raised a curious eyebrow.

I sighed.

"Look, I'll be frank," I started, licking my lips. "My friend, Selphie, I'm sure you've heard of her since well…" I paused to think of something to say. I quickly looked to see if Selphie was still there and the brunette shot me a glare so heated it would've set my hair on fire. I looked at the group of girls, "… It's common knowledge that she's the devil in carnet. Anyway, we made this club and we'd really appreciate it if you'd give us the chance at participating in the club fair next week."

Maria pondered for a bit, playing with her braid. I looked on, swallowing thickly, hoping that my ravishing good looks were enough to get the club on board. But when I heard her say, "Sorry, no can do," as she shook her head, I could feel my left eye twitch with annoyance.

I frowned. "Why?"

She snorted and rolled her eyes, crossing her arms over he chest as she leaned forward to rest her elbows on the lunch table. "Listen up pretty boy," she said, snidely, "Her club doesn't deserve to be placed on the school's map. A Selphie awareness club?" The raven hair girl scowled. "Please, fifth graders can come up with better club themes."

"But it's not just about Selphie awareness. Our club is about helping people out and finding them happiness."

I stopped myself before going any further. Why was I defending the club? Could be it be that deep down in the frozen depths of my heart I actually care about this obnoxious club? Or maybe it's the fact that Selphie is clearly only five feet away and can still, in that short distance, be on me in a split second to rip the flesh off my bones if I were to disobey her.

Yeah. That's it. I'll go with the latter and call it fear.

But it seemed that Maria wasn't buying into my good looks or my lame attempts at doing the club some sort of justice.

"That's what the community service club is for," she replied.

I nodded. Because it was a good point, a fine damn good point that I couldn't argue.

"Listen," I said, placing my hands in my pockets. "We just want a booth, is that too much to ask for?"

"Yes it is!" Maria untangled her arms to slam her hands onto the table to glare at me of all innocent victims. "Especially when that little tart…" she pointed over my shoulder in Selphie's general direction. I looked over to see Selphie's eyes widen, "…had the nerve to seduce my boyfriend to get his laptop!"

I raised an eyebrow. Well, it was good to know where the source of Maria's white hot rage was coming from. I rolled my eyes when Selphie mouthed the words 'she's clearly lying, now kiss her so that I can flee to safety!' and turned my attention back to a seething Maria.

"She kissed my boyfriend, the president of the computer club and managed to black mail him with that by making him give up their newest laptop!" she snapped in a shrill voice that made me wince.

I opened my mouth, but then closed it, trying to think of something comforting to say. But the throbbing vein on Maria's forehead was telling me that I would get my tongue ripped out if I tried. Instead, I resorting to fleeing like a coward, telling the angry girl that I understood and that I would tell Selphie. The girl merely snorted at my meek reply and I walked away, a scowl on my lips as I walked towards Selphie's hiding spot. I grabbed the perky brunette, snatching her out of her corner.

"Riku, I thought we discussed that you were going to play tonsil hockey with—"

"She doesn't want to give us a booth!" I snapped, letting her go.

"What! Why?!" she asked, sickly innocent of what Maria just accused her of earlier. I rolled my eyes and sighed.

"Selphie, you stuck your tongue down her boyfriend's throat and stole his laptop!"

She placed her hands on her hips. "Oh please, he wasn't even that good of a kisser," she snorted. "That loser," she muttered as an after thought.

"Selphie!"

"What!?"

"You can't go around kissing people's boyfriends, stealing, black mailing, and whatever else you do that's evil in order to get your way!" I chided.

Selphie sucked her teeth, annoyed that I was treating her like a child. In hindsight, she was acting like child, a very spoiled, obnoxious child that would throw a tantrum if she didn't get her way. And she was oblivious to this because of her ridiculous notion of being the center of the universe (as if that's not selfish and insane enough) but I'm getting a bit ahead of myself and the plot. The point was the girl was morphing into a monster and there was nothing I could do at the moment in time but to let her do what she wanted in the hopes that she would get bored and free me of her slavery.

"Whatever," she muttered. "If she's not going to let us in, then we're going to have to let ourselves in." she said, her eyes dark with determination.

I sighed and didn't bother to fight her as she pulled me by my collar and started dragging me to some unknown location.

note: next week's episode will be late since I'm starting school next week and have to figure out how to fit this in along with my course work and my job. thanks for reading!