Chapter 12

Sweeney stared with regret at the baker, who was walking away from him quickly. He didn't know exactly what had just happened. He refused to fully believe that they had actually kissed, but he couldn't deny that, whatever they had shared, was special. Instead of what he had expected, the woman didn't make him feel disgusted with himself; she had made him feel calm and loved, as if there was still some humanity left in his being.

But now, she was leaving him, and for once, he absolutely didn't want her to.

"Nellie," he said to her, "don't go away. Let me..."

But she didn't listen; instead, she reached for the doorknob. If he didn't do anything, she would be gone within a few seconds and intuitively he felt that the moment she left the room, he would never experience again the unfamiliar feeling that he had felt when they had kissed. He wasn't sure yet if it was a good thing or not what she had done to him, but he was desperate to find out.

Without thinking about it twice, Sweeney got up from the bed and blocked her way out, placing himself between the door and the body of his landlady.

She looked up at him with those extremely expressive eyes. They were still clouded with love and hope; and the sight of that alone was enough to make him lose control again. He was awfully aware of the fact that the situation between them would become very awkward and possibly even more problematic if he didn't stop himself, but Mr. Todd simply couldn't resist taking again what she had given him before.

Part of him was still debating what to do or what not to do, but before he could come to a decision his primal instincts took over. Before realizing fully what he was doing, he threw her against the wall and kissed her once more. Not softly and carefully like he just had done, but roughly and hungrily.

Even as this was happening this way he tried to stop himself, not because he didn't want this to happen but because he didn't want to scare Mrs. Lovett. But once more, he found himself incapable of getting away from her.

The baker was caught off guard completely by the totally unexpected behavior of Mr. Todd. Her initial reaction was to push him away from her, but her body seemed to have a will of its own now. She found himself responding to his kiss eagerly and before his mind had even registered this fact, her hands found their way underneath his shirt on their own accord. All the fear disappeared, along with her rationality, and was replaced by the unstoppable urge to be with Mr. Todd in a way she had dreamed of for so long at last.

The barber himself didn't object at that very moment; he seemed to be too focused on the woman now to understand what he was actually doing. This time, Mrs. Lovett didn't mind this at all and instead of thinking what she should do next to make sure that Sweeney wouldn't come to his senses and leave her, she gave in to the urge to unbutton his shirt and kiss every inch of skin that she revealed that way.

As the barber didn't attempt to stop her and continued kissing her, it was clear that she wasn't the only one of them who was overwhelmed by the sudden passion. Feeling more confident because of this, she dared to brush the now unbuttoned shirt off Mr. Todd's shoulders and ran her fingers over his chest, exploring the skin that she had craved to feel for such a long time.

A reluctant moan escaped from the barber's throat, making it clear to her that for him too kissing was not enough anymore. Although he was still pushing her against the wall, he tried to move his landlady's dress out of the way of his eager hands.

While making sure they didn't break the kiss, Mrs. Lovett tugged together with him at the laces of her dress. As the things just wouldn't come lose and neither of them seemed to posses the ability to remain standing any longer, the two of them managed to make their way towards the bed. A little while later they collapsed on it, falling on the sheets as one piece of entwined limbs and messy hair.

They were both completely lost in the moment and because of the almost spontaneous passion they experienced, neither of them was aware of the boundaries that they were crossing. Only when the laces of his landlady's clothes refused to cooperate with his desperate fingers and Mr. Todd hiked up the woman's skirts, the barber realized what was about to happen.

In spite of the heat inside of him, the barber froze at the spot as he realized at last that he was taking advantage of Mrs. Lovett in the most horrible way. This way he wasn't helping her, only traumatizing and scaring her more.

Mrs. Lovett immediately noticed the change within him and with difficulty, they broke their kiss. Since they didn't manage to move away from each other, they remained lying on top of each other, both breathing heavily.

"What's wrong?" she asked quietly.

His eyes were closed and although he tried not to, he was still aware of the fact how much he enjoyed the feeling of her skin, her hair... everything that was her.

"This is wrong," he said. "All I wanted to do was make you unafraid of men, and what do I do? I treat you exactly the same as all them."

"No, you didn't," Mrs. Lovett whispered. "You didn't hurt me. It's not wrong, Mr. Todd."

"It is," he insisted. "I couldn't control myself, just like them. And besides, I shouldn't have touched you in the first place."

"It's because of Lucy, isn't it?" the baker asked for the second time that day, hoping to get an actual answer now.

"Yes," he said through clenched teeth, "or... no."

The barber just stared at her without giving an answer and Mrs. Lovett feared that she had angered him, that he hated her because he had kissed her and that he had liked it – the woman had felt that Mr. Todd enjoyed himself just as much as she had done. Even now he was still lying on top of her, he quivered every time a bit of skin or a tress of her hair accidentally brushed his body.

They remained silent for a while as they just stared into each others eyes and Mrs. Lovett wondered if one of them would find the courage to speak before the day was over, since both of them seemed to be embarrassed to say anything.

However, words weren't the things that broke the silence. The feeling of something wet on her skin brought her back from the trance-like state she was in. It took a few more little pools of salty water on her heated skin before she realized that Mr. Todd was crying.

Her eyes widened in shock as the demon barber finally surrendered himself to his grief. But she recovered immediately and quickly she wrapped her arms around the man. She pulled him closer to her again, so he could perhaps feel that he wasn't fighting his inner demons all by his own.

As the baker listened to Sweeney's quiet sobs, tears welled in her own eyes too as it became clear to her once more how this beautiful man was broken by the unfairness and cruelty of the world. Mrs. Lovett didn't speak any words of comfort to the barber, for they would be empty and useless anyway. Of course it would be appropriate to say that everything would be fine, but they both had found out the hard way that their endings wouldn't necessarily be happy ones.