A/N: So I went back and took some more time to try and make it better and a more complete chapter, but in the end this is what it is. Filler (LoL). An emotional conversation amidst a beautiful backdrop in my mind. And a way for me to tie up some loose ends before moving forward. Don't judge me too harshly. -Mel
It takes nearly an hour for Beth and Daryl to reach the creek, and by the time they do they've already felled five walkers between them. The hunter yanks his bolt free from the bloody corpse and turns. "This 'S a bad idea. We should head back. 'S' not safe."
"And what's safe anymore Daryl," Beth urges softly. "We can't just stop living because somethin' bad might happen?"
"Might! Already has Beth! Look around!"
"What makes you think I'm not! I'm exactly where I want to be, with the person I want to be with. We're standing in a magnificent forest on a beautiful day at the end of the world, and you wanna turn back because you're suddenly afraid!"
"Best get one thing straight girl. I ain't afraid of nothin'! Got my reasons."
"Yah and I've got mine. Daryl, we're leaving tomorrow and today is all we have. I want to spend it with you, out here on our terms. You've taught me so much. You need to trust in that. I do." For emphasis, Beth pulls her knife from the head of the walker she's been holding upright and the creature slumps to the ground at her feet. "We've come this far. We're goin'."
Daryl narrows his eyes in last ditch effort to get her seein' things his way, and when Beth refuses to back down he growls. "Anyone tell yah before that yer damn stubborn, woman."
"Once or twice. Thought you liked that about me," she smiles back sweetly.
"Phefffff.."The problem is, he does like it, he likes it a lot. But no matter how hard he tries he can't seem to shake the image from his head. The helpless feeling in his gut that tells him he won't be able to protect her, and it's sufficating.
The lighter blue flecks in the hunter's eyes deepen and his tone is suddenly soft when he addresses her again. "You sure you're ok?"
Beth doesn't miss the hitch in his voice, and before she can even nod her reply the hunter is already standing beside her. Gently he skims calloused fingers along her arms, over her shoulders, across her back; Needing to check for himself that she hasn't been harmed.
"I'm fine Daryl, honest."
"Well let's get goin' then," he gruffs out. "We're burning daylight just standin' here."
Beth shakes her head but doesn't say a word as she matches stride with the hunter. The duo walking side by side along the creek-bed for nearly an hour more, following its meandering course upstream as it rambles through the forest on a gradual yet steady incline. Both Beth and Daryl keep to the path until a particularly rough patch of terrain leaves them little choice but to break away, forcing them to fork around and seek another way up the steep granite shelf that now lines both sides of the embankment.
It's only a twenty minute detour at most, but the extensive climb leaves Beth's calves burning; And the spot on her thigh where the bullet was lodged is starting to ache just a little. Daryl sure wasn't lying when he said 'this ain't no easy hike'.
Upon reaching the top, the hunter loops them back in the direction of the creek and at long last they meet up with it again, only now it's below them.
Daryl stands back a ways from the edge and nervously gauges Beth's reaction as she stares over the precipice with a look of wide-eyed wonder. She gazes down to where a set of small rapids have taken the place of the previously quiet stream. The slightly stronger current pushing the shallow water along, tumbling it about in short bursts of low dips and sharp turns. The motion causing small caps of white foam to bubble up and dance along the surface as it sprays against the jagged rocks that protrude up from beneath.
In the distance Beth hears a low thrumming echo through the trees, and wagering a guess as to what it might be she smiles. The joy on her features, reflects out through her eyes and she turns to look at the man behind her. "Daryl, is that...?"
Cutting her off quickly, the hunter clears his throat and reaches for her hand. "Come on, 's'not much further. Don't wanna blow the surprise now, do yah girl?" He gives her a playful wink then turns abruptly on his heel, pulling her back into the denser part of the forest on a different path. Together they traverse the downward slope at a snails pace, being ever so careful as they make their way around the steepest curve of the ravine.
Daryl is vigilant, his eyes constantly moving from the thick foliage of the forest floor to the trees that surround them, and then back to Beth... Checking... always checking.
Beth wonders if it will always be like this for them now. Daryl always checking, and her always wondering about the reason he does it. Worrying that he will never be able to forgive himself for events so totally out of his control. Daryl never asks her and Beth never says, but the missing time hangs like a curtain between them.
"Ready?"
The hunter's deep voice pulls Beth from her thoughts and without missing a beat she eagerly nods in reply. The thrumming sound is all around them now and it beats like a drum through the trees. Daryl moves in closer and covers Beth's eyes with the palm of his hand while he simultaneously pulls back the final branches that block their view. When he does, Beth gently places her hand over his, sliding it slowly down her face as she takes a step forward. The toe of her boot splashing the water while she stares at the space around them with majestic awe.
"This place... it's amazing! Thank you so much for bringing me here."
Glad that she likes it, a blushing Daryl lowers his head and shrugs. "Don't own it," he states shyly, attempting to hide his embarrassment behind his long dark fringe.
Beth turns around, noticing how uncomfortable her words have made him and so she stays silent, patiently waiting while he puts himself back together. A task that doesn't take him nearly as long with her now.
Daryl coughs, signaling to Beth that his discomfort has passed, then speaks in a low gravelly voice, "The Cherokee use to call this land we live, 'The land of a thousand waterfalls'. There's lots more where we're goin', but a better view of this one's out there. Wanna see?"
"Hell yah!," Beth replies.
Daryl smirks at her enthusiasm and carefully helps her up over the first set of rocks that run through the middle of the shallow rapids. "I gotcha," he says, helping to steady her balance on a slightly shaky boulder. "I think next we need to work on yer center of gravity, Greene."
Beth scowls at his joke, but none the less allows him to lead her forward one rock at a time until they reach the large flagstone that sits closer to the oppisite bank, and plop down.
Daryl places his crossbow beside him on the rock and attempts to look comfortable as the memories of a sadder time wash over him. This is where he went to be alone, to escape the feelings that scared him most. Now he's gone and brought the girl with him, essentially shattering what little he had left of his defences.
Leaning into the hunter, Beth rests her head on his shoulder. "It really is beautiful you know. Well worth the trip. How'd you every find this place?"
"Beth.. Do you remember what it was like before we found the prison?"
"Umhum"
"Well after Rick and Michonne found me, it was kinda like that. We were always movin', searchin'. Took shelter from the rain in a barn not to far from here. Pickin's were slim and the groups spirits were gettin' low. I just had to keep them motivated yah know... Keep 'em believing."
"Believing? That doesn't sound like you."
"Yah well, things change," he says, stroking her hair. "In the mornin' when I woke up I saw some tracks in the mud and followed 'em here. I was hoping maybe to bag us a buck for dinner. Came up over that ridge right there." Beth squints to the other side of the creek where Daryl is pointing. "Got there right in time to see the diseased fucks rippin' it's throat out."
"Nooooo! That must have been awful."
"Won't lie, it hurt a little. Could've been worse though."
"How do you mean?"
"Three days later we found the church... Then I found you."
"Glad yah did."
"Came up here a few times after that to clear my head. I'd sit here and stare at the falling water. Just thinking... yah know."
"So this is where you were all that time I was wonderin' why you wern't visiting me."
"I couldn't Beth, didn't know what to say. Still don't sometimes. What you went through. Beth I..." Choking on his words, Daryl feels her soft hand squeezing his thigh in silent support and it helps him to get through what he needs to say most. 'Cause if they're goin' back out there, then she needs to know. "When I saw you layin' there like that Beth, I swear I thought... I thought you were dead, and it felt like a part of me was dyin' too."
A lump grows in her thoat at the memory of it. She doesn't like to go back there, but maybe it's time. Letting out a troubled sigh, Beth closes her eyes and curls her legs into her chest, listening to the sound of the falling water as she prepares herself to relive it.
"I had a place like this too... at the hospital. It wasn't nearly as pretty as this though. There was a doctor there and he was nice, just wanted to help people, yah know. Anyway, I guess he could see that I was missing home and that I was struggling with it because one day he took me up to the roof. He said it was where he went to get away from things when they got hard and said that if I needed too, I could borrow it from time to time.
I went up there every chance I got after that. I would just sit alone and stare down at what was left of the Atlanta skyline, wondering if I would ever see you again. Daryl, I prayed so hard that you'd find Maggie and the others... I thought about my Dad..." Beth pauses, taking in a sharp breath of air as she fans the moisture away from her eyes. "That's where I went when I first started to plot my escape. Didn't quite go to plan though."
Daryl was almost to afraid to ask. "What happened Beth?"
"The hospital... it was like a system, a chain. People riding the backs of other people to survive. Each person was a link. The people on the top, with a lot more power then ones on the bottom. Dawn was their leader and she ran a tight ship. You couldn't move without her knowing about it. Then there were the higher ups. The ones that could pretty much do what they wanted, so long as it didn't effect Dawn. The doctor was below them. He didn't bother anybody and they needed him, so he was treated pretty well. Then there were the people like me. The ones they stole to do the grunt work and keep the higher ups happy.
Dawn claimed they were doing good work and that they were saving people, keeping them safe until a cure was found; But the reality of it was so much different. You work to earn credits. Then those credits are used to buy everything from food, to clothing, to a place to sleep. You can't leave until you earn enough credits to purchase your freedom, and you can never do that because they never give you enough to cover your basic needs. You're alway indebted to them.
Gorman was one of the higher ups, and Dawn's personal henchman. He was also one of the thugs that took me. I was Dawn's ward so she protected me to point, but Gorman made me real nervous. He cornered me a couple of times while I was going about my jobs... made comments, yah know. I can still hear the rattle of his handcuffs echo in my head when I close my eyes. The way he constantly twirled them between his fingers while he stood there watching... always watching. Staring me up and down like I was his next meal." Beth shivers, and Daryl's fists begin to clench.
"After that there came the shift of power. Gorman killed Dawn. He told me so himself. Told me like it was fun for him! Like it was foreplay or somethin'!" Beth's body begins to shake as she sobs into the hunter's chest, but the words she's been holding back for so long keep coming. "He put his hands on me Daryl... he tried to... he tried to..."
"Shhhhh, hush now, 'S'ok I gotch yah Beth. I gatch yah. Ain't nothin' gonna hurt you ever again. I'll kill him! I'll kill him for you Beth!"
She pulls out of their embrace and looks on Daryl with tortured eyes. "No need. Don't you see... I already did." Silence falls between them as the hunter puts together the pieces of what's she's trying to say, of what's really bothering her. "And I'm not sorry either. He was an awful man, who did awful things. Gorman deserved to die, and I'm glad I did it. What kind of monster does that make me now?"
"Yah ain't no monster Beth. You just did what needed doin'. You protected yourself. You're a survivor and the toughest girl I know."
"What do I do with that though. Now that I know I'm capable of feeling that. How do I live with it?
"We just do Beth... We just do."