A/N: Apparently people are more into pimp Cartman than I thought pft. Excellent because that element was actually going to be in a different story of mine, but I figured it worked here just as well.

Hurray for lazine-I mean efficiency! Yay!

Enjoy~

The three of them sat side by side, their eyes dully lit by the glowing light of Kenny's old laptop. Stan averted his gaze from the screen, fiddling with a pen he found strewn on the desk in front of him.

"We're going to lose all our royalties if we do this," Kyle muttered, watching Kenny slowly wading his way through various videos of theirs, working through the tedious task of deleting them off the numerous sites.

Ken's blue eyes flickered to the redhead beside him and he let out a heavy, tensed breath. "Yeah. But I personally would rather these things not be out and about anyway. The less people who know about this shit the better."

Kyle nodded a bit, his dimmed green eyes fixated lazily on the screen still. "I guess this is just the one time in my life I have to trust that fat bastard."

Stan leaned back in his chair, looking around Kenny's back over at the boy and he shook his head, "Dude, this is fucking crazy of you to be doing."

The redhead merely shrugged, pushing his bangs back off of his face tiredly. "Well, Stan, what he was offering was too good to pass up. And if he means it that I won't be hurt again, well, I'm just going to have to play with the cards he dealt me right now." He finally looked over at his best friend, his face sunken in embarrassment and exhaustion. His eyes scanned over Stan's face before his shoulders dropped and he sighed. "Stan, which video did you find?" he asked quietly.

The boy blinked and cleared his throat awkwardly, dropping his gaze to the floor. "The...the one with the guys who are after you."

"Oh fantastic," he scoffed, throwing his head back and staring up at his and Kenny's cracked plaster ceiling. "The one goddamn gangbang I'm thrown into and you find it," he rolled his eyes. "Of all the goddamn luck I swear to Christ," he placed his hand over his eyes and shook his head.

"I'm sorry," Stan whispered, turning his attention back to the pen being fiddled with in his fingers. It was true, visions of that video were definitely not doing what they had done to him in his room anymore. The whole ugly truth behind it was just way too much for him to even think about anything exciting and erotic within the whole disaster. It felt like he'd been paraded around a pet adoption center, playing with the puppies and feeling on cloud nine before going home and being informed every animal had been euthanized when he left. It was sickening and uncomfortable, it left a heavy, slick weight bearing down on his chest and heart. Now he knew that there was just no way to just back out of the whole mess; He was going to be in this for the long haul, but not nearly as roughly thrust into it as the two beside him were going to be.

Kyle's voice piqued him back into reality, "I'm not mad at you. You found something that we put on the internet. Not like it's exactly the plethora of secrecy," he mumbled. He sighed once more and leaned his head down on Kenny's shoulder, "We'll figure this out."

"I hope so," Kenny muttered, clicking through tabs on his browser, his eyes darting around the pages behind thick, narrowed brows. "Okay, that's all of 'em," he sighed, clicking out of the internet and looking down at the boy nestled against him. "Why the fuck is he so interested in getting you off the internet though?"

Kyle shrugged, "I couldn't even begin to imagine. But...unfortunately we all know Fatass well enough to know that he's thought this through. I'm sure he's got everything down to the smallest detail ready to fucking go," he shuddered a bit.

Stan threw the pen onto the desk, the three of them watching as it clattered against the wood before he directed his attention back over to the two of them. "Why you, though? Why the fuck would he want to start this whole bullshit with you?" he asked softly.

Kyle scoffed, leaning off of Ken and staring at him with the usual smart and alert beams of his eyes peaking back through. "You just answered it yourself, Stan," he drawled. "Because it's me. You know Cartman wouldn't pass up a chance to humiliate me and fuck knows that nothing can get more humiliating than this."

Kenny groaned softly, looping his arm over Kyle's shoulder and pulling him flush against his side. "You don't have to you know," he said softly. "We could..." he paused, biting his lip and looking over at Stan pleadingly, hoping that maybe one of them could have the answer to their problems waiting to be let out in that moment.

"Live in the homeless shelter?" Kyle finished. "Kenny. Ken, look at me," he said firmly, waiting for his blonde head to swing back around and gaze down at him. "Look, we're doing this. I'm doing this. I don't want to but I also don't want us living in the gutter, all right? While Cartman's paying our goddamn rent, we can plot and plan all we want, okay?" Kenny nodded softly and Kyle leaned up, meeting his lips gently. "We're gonna get through this, I promise."

"Jesus Christ you two," Stan said softly in disbelief, shaking his head from his palm cupping his chin.

They pulled apart and looked at him confusedly, "What?" Ken blinked.

He chuckled softly to himself, letting his eyes drift back to Kenny's laptop. "You two are just...fucking crazy." He glanced at them and gave them a small smirk. "Never woulda thought that any couple could stand going through this shit. How the fuck are you two even managing it?"

Kyle raised his brow at him, "Uhhh because we've been together for like six years?"

"And we love each other?" Kenny added just as confusedly.

Stan recoiled back a bit, ignoring Kenny and staring at Kyle with wide eyes. "Six years?!" he repeated. "The fuck, you two have been together for two!"

Kyle's face fell into a deep rouge and he slapped his palm onto his face, "Whoops."

Kenny chuckled and winked at Stan teasingly, "Nah, I snagged this cute little bastard wayyyyy back in sophomore year. We tip-toed around everyone until high school ended and we wouldn't have to deal with our parents as much," he shrugged.

Stan looked over at the still blushing and rather guilty looking Kyle, feeling that wave of hurt starting all over again. "Why didn't you tell me?" he asked. "Jesus Christ, Kyle, what the fuck else have you been hiding from me all this time?!"

"Nothing else, I swear," he insisted, finally looking him in the eyes. "Stan, we just didn't want anyone breathing down our backs about how 'bad' of an idea the two of us being together was," he gestured between himself and Kenny. "I mean, fuck, you know how my parents were about Ken's family."

"And," Kenny added smartly, "If he told you, it would've gotten back to Sheila and Gerald and you damn well know it. You can't keep a secret to save your goddamn life."

"Pretty sure I'm going to be holding on to the secrets that I've learned over these last few days pretty well," he grumbled.

A few moments of silence passed before Kyle sighed and shook his head, "Stan..." the boy looked back up at him, the betrayal still etched on his tired face. "Stan, you know I hate hiding shit from you," he admitted guiltily. "Why the fuck do you think that Kenny and I told you we were going out graduation night?"

"He was practically exploding not telling you," Ken snorted. "In fact, that was the only fight we had in high school," he smirked. "All about you, Stanny boy. Pretty sure Ky has more love for you than he ever will for me." He smiled as Kyle smacked his arm and rolled his eyes at the blonde.

Stan forced out a chuckle and shook his head around subtly, "You two...are the weirdest goddamn couple I've ever had the displeasure of dealing with." He leaned back in his chair and smirked at the two of them before it slowly fell again into a straight line along his lips. "Look, I'm going to tell you something right now, and you both need to listen to me." the two of them glanced at each other worriedly before focusing back on him. "If I'm involved with...whatever the fuck is going on here," he gestured around aimlessly, "Then no more goddamn secrets, all right? If someone is going after you, you need to tell me. If someone hits you or some shit, you need to tell me. He paused, focusing on his best friend, "Kyle, if you get pregnant with a butt-baby, you need to tell me," he added with a small quirk of the lips.

Kyle couldn't help but laugh a bit, shaking his head and glancing down at the ground. "Gotcha, Stan wants to be Uncle Stan and nothing come Hell or high water is gonna stop him."

"Hey man, someone needs to teach the little bastard his sports, Lord knows you two can't," he rolled his eyes with a bemused smirk.

Kyle chuckled and met eyes with him again, nodding softly, "I promise. No more secrets. Though you know that you're more than welcome to just step out of this whole thing."

"In fact, it's preferred," Ken added dryly.

Stan looked up at him and quirked his brow, "Motherfucker, we have been over this already," he said firmly. "I can't just fucking go home and think all is well and good with you two and just catch up with you at the goddamn coffee shop every few days. Jesus Christ, Kenny, I'm just trying to help."

"I know, I know," he raised his hands defensively. "I'd just rather you didn't see Kyle getting fucked by strangers...again," he raised his brow and crossed his arms. "Just how much of that video did you see exactly, Marsh?"

"Stan, do not answer that," Kyle said firmly, looking up and smacking the back of Kenny's head. "I don't want to know that answer and neither should you, Ken."

He looked down at the redhead and shrugged, "Well, excuse me for being possessive of ya." He jerked his head over to the blushing noirette and shrugged again, "Stan is the only person who I know has seen that shit that I can actually confront. Kinda just wanted to take my chance."

Kyle shook his head, "No. Because knowing you, you'd turn it into an all-out brawl and I'd be dragging both of your asses to the hospital. And you don't have medical insurance so I'd have to do this bullshit even more," he rolled his eyes. Kenny's face fell guiltily and a flash of panic beamed over Kyle's face. "No, Kenny, not like that," he insisted, grabbing his hands. "You know I don't blame you, okay?...Okay?!"

Kenny nodded silently, staring at their intertwined hands. Stan cleared his throat quietly and leaned over, looking up at Ken's broken expression. "Ken, he's right," he said softly. "This isn't either of yours' fault. It's gonna get better."

"It better," he muttered before a sound broke through them, a webchat call indication appearing on his laptop screen. "It's Cartman," he muttered.

"Oh goody," Kyle sighed, relinquishing Kenny's hands. Kenny clicked on his answer button, all of them staring with raised brows at the microphone icon in place of his camera.

"Turn off your camera, you retard," Cartman's voice broke through. Kenny quickly did as instructed, staring blankly at the screen.

"Why do we need to?" he asked.

"I'd rather someone not see us by chance we have some asshole spying on us," he scoffed.

Kyle rolled his eyes, "Cartman you fucking retard. If they're spying on us, they already know the goddamn IP address, it's not like-"

"Remember that you work for me, Jew," Cartman cut him off sharply. "I expect my employees to treat me with respect."

Kyle seethed in his seat, his fists clenched tightly and his knuckles turning a ghastly white. Kenny quickly grabbed one of his hands, stroking it with his thumb and staring at the chat screen exhaustively. "What the fuck do you want, Fatass?" the blonde questioned.

He chuckled lowly, "We're gonna go meet your friends."

"Did you get the money?" Stan asked, leaning back and crossing his arms, glaring at the screen though he full and well knew that it wasn't like Cartman could exactly see his anger.

Another scoff, "Of course. You think getting $600 is hard for a guy like me? Please. Where the hell did you tell them to meet you, Po'Boy?"

Kenny sighed, "A warehouse down on 34th. Apparently they hang out there a lot," he rolled his eyes.

"All right. All three of you are to meet me there in ten minutes."

A beat of silence passed before Kyle yelped a bit, trying to wrestle Kenny's hand off of him which had tightened severely around the limp appendage. "Kyle. Isn't. Going," the blonde spat.

"Oh yes he is, Kinny," Cartman said angrily. "Look, you're going to want him there, trust me. Stop worrying, they won't hurt a hair on his little stupid Jew head with what I have."

Kyle's brow raised, "W-what do you have?"

"That's for your boss to know," he snorted. "Ten minutes. I'll meet you in the public lot down past the warehouses."

"Fine," Kyle growled, reaching forward and slamming Kenny's laptop shut. His hand remained on the screen, staring at it with furious eyes. "This fucker is going to get me killed," he shook his head slowly.

"You're not going," Ken said firmly. "Kyle, I don't give a fuck what he says, it's way too fucking dangerous for you to walk in-"

"Ken, stop," Kyle interjected. He raised his eyes to meet the boy's before getting to his feet and staring down at him. "I know your reservations and they are duly noted. The ugly fact of the matter is that we need the money and right now...he's my boss," he gestured tiredly at the laptop. "I agreed to be compliant with him and...that's just how it's going to have to work."

Stan and Kenny stood up, looking down at the shorter boy with heartbroken blue eyes. "Dude," Stan sighed. "You being compliant with Cartman is just-"

"Something that happens to just be the latest in a long line of my humiliation," he said softly. "Stan, can you drive us there?"

He nodded, grabbing his truck keys from his pocket and tossing them in the air a bit, listening to the jangling tune jumping around in the discorded harmony of their current situation. "I don't like this," Kenny said lowly. "I really don't like the idea of you being anywhere near those fucks."

"Cartman said they wouldn't hurt me and...and we're just going to have to trust him this time," he winced. He grabbed Kenny's hand and interwove their fingers. "Come on, let's just get this the fuck over with."

Kenny's hand tightened around his, letting him lead their way out the front door. Stan followed closely behind, watching the subtle tremors of Kenny's shoulders, the way that Kyle's free hand couldn't stop fiddling with his hair. It was a lot to take in, watching the two of them becoming absolutely terrified together. He couldn't say that he was feeling much better, however. He let out a long sigh as he closed their door behind him softly, making his way towards the parking lot with them in utter silence. Each footstep sounded like a countdown, one to which Stan nor anyone else had a clue what it would result in. But to the three boys heading through the concrete, it felt like the steps to the front of the firing squad.

"Okay, take a left here and it's right down the street," Kenny mumbled from the passenger seat, his hand still tightly clasped around Kyle's as he sat crouched down in the back, hidden beneath Stan's emergency winter blanket per Kenny's request. Kenny's hood was up, obscuring his hair and the majority of his face as he quietly gave Stan directions, his eyes darting around alertedly.

"Calm down," Stan said for about the fiftieth time in the short drive to the lot. "Kenny, it's going to be okay."

Sharp blue eyes shot into his own and a concealed brow narrowed in anger. "Good to know that you're fucking psychic, Stan," he spat.

Kyle tightened his hand around the blonde's, "Ken, don't get mad at him," he said softly. "Everything will be fine."

Ken paused before nodding, refusing to look back his way. His paranoia of the men possibly spying on them was racking through him, his nerves beginning to reach the boiling point. Giving away Kyle in the backseat was a complete non-option. If he had it his way, he'd stow the boy down in the bed of the truck, completely covered until he finished the deal himself. But he knew better, he knew that that wasn't how Cartman wanted it to go down. Stan turned into the public lot, his and Ken's eyes landing on Cartman standing against his mother's car, watching them with a smug smirk on his face. "I have a feeling I'm going to end up killing him at the end of all this," he growled.

"Not if I get the chance first," Kyle sighed tiredly. The truck came to a stop and Kenny put his hand up in front of Kyle, telling him not to move. Stan and Kenny stepped out of the truck, looking around suspiciously as Cartman came up towards them.

"Calm the fuck down, they're not here," the brunette rolled his eyes. "Kahl, get the fuck out of your little hiding spot."

The clear sound of Kyle growling softly entered the afternoon air before he emerged from the truck, throwing the blanket down onto the seat and glaring up at the heavyweight in front of him. "Why do I have to be here, Cartman?"

The boy smirked, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a wad of twenties, handing it to the Jew. "Because you will be the one making the transaction."

"Oh hell no!" Kenny screeched. "I'll do it, Cartman!"

A pudgy finger wagged in the air as Cartman clucked his tongue, "Now. We're going to do this my way. Because I'm about to show the three of you just what it is I can do to make sure that the little whore here is safe," he reached down and pinched Kyle's cheek. The redhead sneered and batted his hand away.

"Stop calling me a whore, Cartman!" he hissed.

He snorted, grabbing Kyle's arm and beginning to tote him out of the lot with Kenny and Stan following closely behind, a deep glare set on both of their faces. "I'll call you whatever the fuck I want, Kahl," he said simply before looking back into Kenny's furiously blazing eyes. "Just which warehouse is it?"

"16," he muttered, stepping up and yanking Kyle back out of his grip.

Cartman glared at him with a dark tone underlying his brown eyes. "You don't want me to touch him? Fine. But you better not either unless you two are at home, do you fucking understand me, Poor boy?"

"You're trying to tell me when I'm allowed to touch my fucking boyfriend?" he seethed.

He shook his head, "When we're out here in the open, he's not your little pansy-ass boyfriend. He's a fucking worker and having someone like you latching onto him isn't going to help us any."

Kyle growled, slowly pulling his arm out of Kenny's grip. "What does it matter if someone sees us together, Fatass?"

"All in due time, Jew," he chuckled, turning his attention back to the front of the line. "Did you delete all of your little pornos as I asked?"

"Yes," he snarled, the red striking along his cheekbones in full force. "And just why did we need to do that and lose our money?!"

"All in due time," he repeated in a soft murmur, leading them up to the warehouse with a large 16 printed on the side of the door. "Any specific way you're supposed to get in?" he asked Kenny.

The blonde took a deep, angry breath, stepping up and hitting the small side door in an oddly jaunty fashion: One long hit, two staccato in succession, and another three lengthy. He backed up, his hands automatically going to grasp at Kyle's shoulders before Cartman swatted them down. They all looked over as the large metal overhead door on the front began sliding open. They stepped back, watching as the five men popped into view and Stan's eyes quickly scanned around the room. His stomach dropped nauseatingly as he realized it was the same room that the video he found was taped in.

"Well well well, Pretty Boy is here," their 'leader' smiled, his teeth yellow and crooked in the bright daylight. "Was expecting to have to find you tonight," he chuckled darkly. "You have our money?"

"Yes," he said angrily. "All six hundred fucking dollars, you sick fuck."

"Kahl," Cartman said quietly. "Behave."

Kyle's entire body twitched as he let Cartman's order sink in. Taking command from him of all people...It never boded well within the poor kid and it never would. This whole deal was going to be much more difficult than he had imagined.

The man looked between the two of them and snorted, "Thought Blondie over there was your squeeze," he jerked his head over towards Kenny who was shaking in his place. Stan came over beside him and placed his hand on his shoulder, squeezing it lightly. "Didn't know you had such big tastes," he continued, smirking at Cartman. The brunette stayed silent, his face unmoving as he looked between the five in his analytical pattern that was just part of who he had always been. A small smirk broke over his lips before falling back into stone. The man redirected his attention back onto the small redhead and he paused, letting out a laugh. "Looks like you pissed someone else off there, didn't ya, Red?" he pointed at his own eye in mockery. "You were so good to me and the boys here," he gestured behind him. "Was there really someone that didn't appreciate what a good little whore you are?" he drawled tauntingly. Kyle's face was beaming, his eyes brimming with tears. His breath came out in furious wisps between his teeth before he felt Cartman's thick hand on his shoulder and he looked up at him confusedly.

"Do you want your money or not?" The brunette asked simply, his voice strangely calm and even.

The man nodded, "Yeah. I do. But I'm going to need all four of you to back the fuck up," he waved them back.

Cartman nodded, leading Kyle back and silently motioning for the others to do so as well. They got themselves a good ten feet away before the brunette squeezed Kyle's shoulder. "Go give him the money, Kahl," he pushed the boy forward a bit. Kyle gulped, taking the wad of cash out of his pocket and shakily stepping over towards the man. Kenny looked ready to leap over to get between him and the man and Cartman glared. "Marsh, hold him back," he said curtly. Stan looked between the two of them before slowly wrapping his hands around Kenny's arms, still leaving it plenty loose enough for the two of them to break free if need-be.

Kyle's trembling hand reached forward with the bills before the man's face broke into a vicious grin and he grabbed the boy's arm, wrenching him forward. Kyle let out a large yelp and Kenny broke forward, being snared by the collar by Cartman and tossed back onto the ground. "Stay there, Kinny," he hissed. "You, too," he nodded at Stan. They both looked at each other before back to Kyle who was struggling to get his arm out of the man's grip.

"Let go!" he shouted, kicking at him and digging his nails into the thick forearm. "You fuck I said let MMPH!" he screeched as another two men came up, one snaring his other arm and the other slamming his palm across his open mouth.

"He just talks too much," the leader chuckled sardonically. "I think we'll take payment in both forms today if you don't mind." Kyle's eyes widened, honing in on Kenny desperately as he ground his feet down, thrusting his chest around wildly as he tried to struggle free.

The blonde hopped to his feet to rush over and Cartman pushed him back a bit, smirking at the large man. "I do mind, in fact. You happen to be holding my property."

He scoffed, "Oh really? Well you need to learn to take better care of your toys. This one just seems to keep ending up in our laps," he grinned.

"Really?" he cocked his head. "Because I'd think the only toys you should be handling are those of your three daughters, isn't that right, Mr. Feldson?"

The man froze and stared at him, his brows narrowing. "What...what the fuck did you say, Tubby?"

He shrugged casually, looking at him with an almost bored expression, "I'm just saying, I'd think that you and your wife of 28 years would be more equipped to handling Barbie dolls than that kind of toy," he gestured to Kyle, who watched him with confused eyes. "But then again..." he stared at the man and his face broke into Cartman's trademark sadistic grin, "I highly doubt your lovely Anna knows anything about your fondness for boys half your age...does she, Rowan?"

The man's jaw dropped and all eyes focused on him, "How...how the fuck did-"

"Because you were fucking with my property," he said darkly, the smile melting off his face into a vicious scowl. "No one fucks with my things without me getting involved. So I suggest that you throw the whore back my way, take your money, and you stay the fuck away from him, lest I contact your lovely wife and tell her just what it is you've been up to."

"She'd never believe you," he scoffed.

He cocked his head and raised his brow, "Except...we have video evidence, remember? That's the only reason you're getting any money is because you were perfectly content with being filmed while fucking this slut," he jerked his head to Kyle. "I have more than enough information on all of you to make your lives a living fucking hell if you don't toss him back over here. Do we understand each other, Mr. Feldson?"

His dark eyes widened in realization, his lips curling into a snarl. "Fine," he spat, nodding at the two beside him. They slowly relinquished their grip on the stunned redhead. Rowan tightened his grip around Kyle's arm before throwing him forward out into the cement, letting him land in a curled heap on the ground. The boy scrambled up and ran back to the others, watching the group as he backed up between Cartman and Kenny. The man glared at Cartman before looking back at the redhead, beating the wad of cash against his hand. "Guess the party's over, Red. Too bad, coulda had a lot more fun with ya," he smirked before reaching up and grabbing the handle of the door, slamming it down onto the ground. The sound of crashing metal echoed around the street and they all stared at it before Stan, Kenny, and a still-shaking Kyle looked over at the brunette with wide eyes.

"H-how did..." Kyle started before raking his fingers through his hair anxiously. "Jesus fucking Christ they could've-"

"They wouldn't have," Cartman scoffed. "Not with the shit I had on them. You think it's that hard to figure people's faces out from your little video before you deleted it? Two of them are in my drug ring, it doesn't take long to find their connections. Hell, all I needed was fucking Facebook for that. Smooth sailing from there."

Kyle let his fingers fall loose from his hair and stared up at the glutton, his breathing deep and shaky. "Thanks," he whispered.

Cartman finally looked down at him with a crooked smirk, "Do you believe me now? I know how to keep you out of trouble. But you have to stop being a defiant little bitch and listen to me, do you fucking understand, Kahl?"

Kyle looked over at Kenny and Stan, who were still gaping at the brunette. His shoulders sunk and he stared at the ground. "Yeah. I-I understand."

"Good," he slapped his back a bit. "Then you have a week off," he smiled sweetly.

Kyle looked up at him suspiciously, "What? I figured you'd want to whore me out as soon as goddamn possible."

He chuckled lowly and shook his head, "Oh, Kahl. You know me so much better than that," his eyes sparkled and his white teeth beamed through a lecherous grin. "I have more showmanship than that..." he paused and smirked, looking past the boys towards downtown, "And I have a lot to do to get this town ready for your debut."

A/N: So jsyk, the first chapter of porn will not be the only one. Sorta seems like it but nah, we'll get into some juicy stuff later. I have a looootttt of ideas for potential Kyle customers. Taking a poll right now, anyone interested in BDSM stuff? Like, legit clubbing and a few chapters with that? Because I have a few ideas for that that'll be all drama-y and fun. In fact, any goddamn ideas you have would be nice. Trust me, I have plenty here to completely do the story on my own but I'm curious if anyone wants to see anything specific. Once again, emphasizing I don't NEED the ideas, but, it could be fun to incorporate any plans that you guys may or may not have if you'd like me to /shrug

Up to you.

Also, kinda loving how I'm role-reversaling Ken and Ky a bit here. Poor Kenny is just an emotional wreck and I'm kind of adoring the idea of him being so distraught over the situation and being extra-super protective of Kyle ;u;

hashtag otp4lyfeyoloswag

Thanks for R&Ring!