Thank you so much for your kind words on this fic! I am having so much fun writing it and can't wait to add more!
He looked around and saw nothing but empty chairs. The day had come and gone with most of the agents leaving during the afternoon hours when doctors brought word back that she had passed the critical stage of post-surgery and would most likely make it out of the ordeal with her life.
Crane remembered the deep, pitting feeling in his stomach after those words had been uttered. Up until that point, anxiety still had a death's grip over him. His mind still longing to speak to her before some unfortunate setback occurred and she was pulled from his world too soon.
Before long, all that was left was just himself, Ms. Jenny, Joe & Agent Reynolds waiting for further news. Each one with different thoughts, different feelings on why they needed Abbie to awaken and never leave their worlds so traumatized again.
Crane had watched Jenny and Joe sitting a few seats down from him, holding on to each other for dear life. He watched as they shared a brief, yet intimate kiss and silently wondered to himself when Joe had taken his advice and told Ms. Jenny his true feelings. He was caught staring and watched as Ms. Jenny's eyes grew warm and she walked over to sit beside him.
"How are you holding up?" She asked, placing a hand over his.
"Much like yourself, I imagine. Grateful that the Leftanent has proven once again how much of a fighter she is."
Jenny laughed and squeezed his hand. "Oh yes. If I know anything about my sister, I know she would not leave us fighting these battles if there was still work to be done."
Crane smiled and put his head down nodding slowly.
He heard the doors fly open and quickly rose as the doctor came bearing news once again.
"It appears your sister has made great progress within the last hour. We've taken out most of her breathing tubes to make her comfortable and I'll allow her to have a few visitors as long as she doesn't seem disturbed."
Jenny glanced over at Crane, who had yet to see her sister that day.
"Crane… why don't you go back now. We can give you a few minutes if you'd like before we go."
"No", he said ardently. "Please, Ms. Jenny. Go see your sister. I will bide my time out here until you all have had a chance to see her. My time with her can wait."
She smiled and kissed him on the cheek. "Thank you, Ichabod." She turned to look at Joe, who nodded that he would accompany her.
"If it's okay, Jenny, I'd like to come back as well." Reynolds said, taking everyone by surprise.
"Of course." She said as she looked towards the doctor. "Would that be okay?"
The doctor nodded. "Yes, as long as you make sure to keep the noise level down and the thoughts positive. Your sister is still in a very critical stage. She has not awakened yet."
They all nodded and headed back following behind the doctor.
Craned watched them disappear behind the doors and felt his hands twitching beside him. He scolded himself for not taking Ms. Jenny up on her offer to go see the Leftanent first. But he wasn't ready. Wasn't ready to see her hurt, lying helpless once again while he walked the Earth unscathed. And most of all, he wasn't ready to admit to the real reasons why he had left in the first place all those months ago.
Yes. In this very moment, Crane was an undeniable coward. And his self-inflicted punishment was to banish himself alone to the waiting room until he could muster up the courage to look his Leftanent in the eyes and speak his truth.
Almost two hours had passed when he saw Ms. Jenny approaching from the corridor halls.
"Crane, the doctors said that I could stay overnight with her since she still hasn't woken up. I'm gonna head home to grab a few things but she's alone now if you want to go see her."
Crane sighed heavily and smiled. "Thank you Ms. Jenny. I would like that very much."
His steps came slowly and carefully as he walked back into the recovery room corridor, stopping briefly to ask the nurses which room the Leftanent was occupying.
When he got to the door, he heard the voice before he saw him. Agent Reynolds was still in the room, sitting by her bedside and stroking her face as though he could will her eyes to open.
Crane knew he should've backed out of the room, but couldn't. His body wouldn't deny him this opportunity to hear exactly how the agent, who seemed to hold so much disdain for him, really thought of his fellow Witness.
"Abbie… I think back so often of the time we spent together." Crane heard Agent Reynold's voice cracking as he whispered to her.
"Is that where you are right now? Is that why you won't wake up to join us back here?" He laughed softly and Crane saw him place her hand in his. "Because if so, I don't blame you. Our time together was amazing, Abbs."
Crane closed his eyes as he watched Reynolds place a kiss on the backside of her palm. "Do you understand how much I care for you? How much love I have for you, Abbie?"
Crane began to take a step back, suddenly aware of just how much of an intrusion this was. Not just of Agent Reynolds, but also of the Leftanent. He had been blissfully unaware of the depth of feelings between the two agents and now felt suddenly ill. How could she not have suitors beating down her door for her affection? For her commitment? Is that why Agent Reynolds had carried such disdain for him… because of his close relationship with the Leftanent and the ability to see through to what Crane really felt for her?
In backing up, Crane unknowingly ran into the nurse who had been about to enter the room, knocking her tray over and spilling it contents loudly on the floor.
"Oh my, please excuse my clumsiness", he said as he bent down to help her gather her things. He felt a presence behind him and looked up to see Agent Reynolds at his side, attempting to help as well.
"No worries love, I can come back a little while later with these. Just need to check her vitals quickly and you two gentlemen can have as much time with her as you need."
Agent Reynolds cleared his throat and looked over at Crane. "I was just leaving, anyway." he said, nodding over at Crane as he walked out of the room and down the hall.
Crane watched him go and stayed at the doorway while the nurse began to do her check of the Leftanent. He watched as she checked the monitors to make sure her vitals were correct. Lowering the neckline of her hospital gown to also check the gunshot wound for any signs of infection.
Crane looked away in horror at how close it had come to her heart. Just a few inches lower and he would be visiting his partner at the morgue, and not the hospital.
She smiled at him when she was done and closed the door slightly behind her, leaving Crane all alone with the Leftanent for the first time since their argument that morning.
He sat down in the seat farthest away from her, his eyes avoiding her face and instead, staring at the rise and fall of her chest as she lay there motionless.
Crane didn't utter a word. Instead, overcome by the monitor of her beating heart. Steady and strong, filling the room with her courage and undoubted bravery.
He closed his eyes, tears overcoming him and not able to be stopped. He had failed her. Miserably. And here as she lay helpless and hurting, he was never more aware of it in all of their time together.
She had almost left him that day, a bullet from a criminal nearly taking away the one thing in his life that he treasured most. And as much as he hated the thug for what he had done to her, he couldn't help but feel as though what he, himself, had done to her was far worse.
This criminal had not pledged his life to her and then walked out without so much as a goodbye. This criminal had not had his life saved time and time again by the Leftanent and cowardly left her side without telling her how much it was appreciated and cherished.
Crane felt his hands begin to shake at the true enormity of his actions. He opened his eyes to look upon his partner. His friend. And allowed himself to truly see her for what she was to him.
Crane needed her like air itself. Like the breath going through his lungs, allowing his body to function. And she couldn't know that. Not by his actions. All the Leftanent had known was that he was willing to part from her life with the ease and swiftness of a summer's breeze.
He got up and stood over her bed, his eyes looking at her peaceful, yet dormant face. He took his hand into hers softly, his thumb brushing over hers as a tear from his eyes fell onto her forearm.
"I do not know if you can hear me", he said, his voice portraying a strength that his body did not know.
"However, I wish for you to know how truly sorry I am for the hurt I have caused…" his voice stopped, being swallowed by tears. "And I will forever from this day work tirelessly to correct the wrongs I have committed against you."
He stopped, watching as her heart monitor sped up suddenly.
"There is a not a thing in this world, or my last, that I treasure more than you, Abigail Mills…"
"And even if the sentiment is not returned, I will spend the rest of my days proving to you just how deeply my love for you reaches."
He watched as her monitors continued to rise and his eyes rose to the door when the nurse came in suddenly, asking for Crane to leave and give the Leftanent her peace.
He slowly let go of her hand and walked to the door, his eyes still red from spilled tears. And he was almost out of the room when he heard it. A faint cry from behind him.
Turning his body, he looked upon the hospital bed to see the Leftanent, staring back at him, her eyes confused and fear-stricken.
She opened her mouth again to speak, her voice meek and unsure, as she took in her surroundings.
"Crane."