"Check it out!" the Albino screeched, holding out his long arms and sticking out his long white tongue.
"How about we just stop all this?" Colonel Jack O'Neill groaned as he stood behind the white creature.
The Albino kept smiling as he drove the bus with all his hands and feet on the steering wheel.
"You're going to love this!" he screamed.
"That seems most unlikely," Teal'c said in his usual grim deep voice.
"I'm with you, Teal'c." Doctor Leonard McCoy spoke in a somewhat surly tone with a facial expression to match. He had his arms crossed over his blue uniform as he slouched in the back of the bus.
There were others in the back of the bus with him: Captain James T. Kirk, Major Samantha Carter and Doctor Daniel Jackson. All looked rather grumpy and surly. Actually, Daniel winced with a look that was more confused and concerned.
Sitting apart from the others, Spock looked mildly stern. Like the doctor, he sat with his arms crossed.
O'Neill moved toward the back of the bus.
"It's no good, Spock. He's got another one of those barriers up."
Spock formed his fingers into a kind of temple, though O'Neill might call it "spider-against-the-mirror."
"I anticipated as much, Colonel O-Neill. Nevertheless, I shall continue to observe."
"You do that, Spock. Observe. And keep me informed. Keep me apprised. Keep me in the loop." As he spoke, O'Neill glanced out the window where scenery was flying by rapidly. "Wherever he's taking us, he's in a really big hurry."
"Most likely he's just showing off his power," Captain Kirk said sullenly. Along with the others, the captain had been cooped up on the bus for hours.
As he drove, the Albino played with a cigarette lighter. "Ouch!" he grumbled at one point.
"Well, he's not invulnerable, we know that," McCoy said.
"But with those barriers and all he can do, how do we stand up to him?" Carter asked.
"An excellent question, Major Carter," Spock said, still doing the finger thing.
"Keep observing there, Spock," O'Neill said. "Captain Kirk and I will strategize."
Daniel leaned forward. "Uh, excuse me. Mister, uh, Albino? Sir?"
"Call me 'The Master,'" he said.
Daniel frowned. "All right. Mister Master."
"Just Master."
As he usually did, Daniel looked momentarily confused. "Listen. Can you tell me what you're trying to achieve?"
Briefly, The Master glanced back. "I believe I've been clear about that, Doctor Jackson. I want to create changes in the timeline and see what happens."
"Why?"
"Because it's fun," he giggled. "For example, what happens when I do this?"
The Albino/Master pointed a long gnarled crooked finger.
A man appeared on the bus. Tall, dark curly hair, sharp eyebrows, long black coat. Daniel thought he looked like the Sherlock Holmes from the British TV series where Sherlock operated in the modern day.
"Who are you people?" the man demanded.
Kirk rose. "Gary Seven," he whispered.
"Freeze!" The Master ordered.
Gary Seven froze, caught in a look of shock and confusion, eyes half-open.
"Gary Seven has been removed from the timeline," The Master said. "Let's see how that works out, shall we?"
"Must we?" O'Neill said then he leaned in toward Spock. "Who's this frozen guy Gary Seven?"
Briefly, Spockwore a slight frown, then: "He was instrumental in averting a missile that would have caused massive destruction."
"If that got changed, that's not good," O'Neill said.
"Here we go, pulling into our parking spot!" The Master shrieked.
It was an odd sight: a bus, covered with colorful psychedelic designs, pulling into Times Square. The bus stopped in the middle of an intersection where everything around, the cars and the crowds, stood in a frozen state. Just like Gary Seven, they were still, motionless. The sound of a ghostly howling wind added to the eeriness.
With his feet still on the steering wheel, The Master pointed to the largest screen in Times Square.
"Observe," he said.
"Do we have a choice?" O'Neill asked in a rather testy voice.
"Amen to that, Colonel O-Neill," McCoy said in a kind of muttering voice.
Images appeared on the giant screen, images that flew by rapidly. Images of Gary Seven, Kirk and Spock, and SG-1. The latter were dressed as hippies.
"Kirk and Spock beam down to Earth to track a rather unusual transporter beam. But before they even meet Gary Seven, he vanishes. I removed him from the timeline. How clever I am!" The Master laughed and clapped his hands.
"Yes, we're all marveling at your cleverness," Kirk said.
"Thank you, captain." The Master bowed his head. "Now to continue. As a result of not meeting Gary Seven, Kirk and Spock got caught up in the situation of S-G-One and their efforts to return to the future. Spock was very concerned about the timeline being polluted."
"Can't blame him for that," Carter said.
"Quite right, Major Carter. Who knows what nasty things can happen when a timeline is altered? Well, in this case, a missile heads for the Soviet Union, launching World War Three!" The Master covered his mouth as he giggled. "It's almost like the time, in an alternate universe, Doctor Jackson launched missiles at the Soviet Union."
"Doesn't sound like me," Daniel said with his frown-face. "Well, I guess I did do that once. But only in my mind."
The Master's dark eyes narrowed. "Let's have no more interruptions." Then a smile slowly spread across his skull-like face. "Now, getting back to that rather nasty missile." The Master held his arms out wide. "Observe! Behold! Voila!"
SG-1 and their "Enterprise" friends all felt a jolt as they found themselves outside the bus, surrounded not by skyscrapers but demolished buildings.
"All life on Earth destroyed!" The Master screeched triumphantly. "S-G-One went through the Stargate and Kirk and Spock got back to the 'Enterprise' just in time to vanish."
"A paradox," Carter said.
As he folded his arms, McCoy adoped a skeptical look. "If that's the case, how is it we're here right now?"
"Very simple, Doctor McCoy. I pulled a Gary Seven out of an alternate timeline. Merely a demonstration, you understand." The Master's smile grew. "And now I shall put him back."
A simple tap of The Master's finger, and Gary Seven was gone. Everyone was back aboard the bus, and Times Square was bustling once again.
The Master spoke in a bored voice. "I'm very tired from altering timelines and such. So, how about we do something just for fun?"
They were suddenly somewhere else. What looked like a stone temple in the middle of a desert.
"Where are we?" O'Neill asked.
"Vulcan," Spock and McCoy said together.
Loud fight music played as Kirk and O'Neill circled each other.
"This guy can control our actions?" O'Neill asked.
"Apparently," Kirk said.
As the others watched, helpless to move, the two fought each other using staff weapons in a kind of duel. This went on until both were down on the ground, unconscious.
The Master clapped his hands. "Well, that was fun. What shall we do next?" As he lit up, he raised a long finger. "I have a wonderful idea!"