I hope you guys are still enjoying this story! Please let me know what you think :)

Meredith couldn't sleep. Which was weird because she loved sleep. Sleep was amazing, and usually the only time she couldn't sleep was when Derek wasn't with her, which was actually pretty rare these days. But right now, even though Derek lay sound asleep beside her, his arm thrown over her stomach, there was no way she would be able to fall asleep.

Maybe it was the fact that she was in her old house, the house, she had spent so many nights sneaking out of to meet Addison instead of spending lonely evenings alone in her room. But she was pretty sure that it was because she had seen her father for the first time since she could really remember, and she wasn't sure what to do about it.

If she could work up the courage to see him, she knew it would be awkward and uncomfortable for everyone. Thatcher obviously had no interest in knowing her; if he did, he would have contacted her when he found out that Ellis was sick. And when, if, they did meet for real, she knew she could find out what he really thought of her and her mother, and she wasn't sure she could stomach hearing that, even if she could predict what he was going to say.

On the other hand, not meeting him would always cause her to wonder what would have happened. She wasn't someone who could let go of her demons easily, and she wouldn't be quick to forget the opportunity she had had to really meet her father and know more about who she was. Even if it was bad, she would at least know more about her past and her family.

She sighed as she slid out from under Derek's arm and reached for her robe to pull on over her sweatpants and T-shirt. If she couldn't sleep, maybe she should just pack some more stuff. The sooner they could get out of here and back to New York, the better it was for everyone.

When she flicked on the light to her mother's study, she was surprised to see that many of the boxes had already been cleared out. Michael and Emma must have done some work while she and Derek had lounged on the couch and watched a movie that afternoon. None of them were about to let her start packing after passing out earlier that morning.

She sank to the floor and opened a box, frowning when she saw piles of black notebooks staring up at her. She reached for the one on top and opened it, her eyes widening as she saw her mother's handwriting, capturing the emotions her mother felt right after Meredith had left for school. She quickly flipped to the back of the diary to see the last entry the day that her mother had checked herself into the assisted living facility.

With a gasp, Meredith looked through each of the diaries, looking at the dates on the top of the first page until she saw a familiar one.

March 23, 1972. The day Meredith was born.

My daughter is beautiful. At this point in time, I can't imagine anything more perfect than holding my daughter.

As Meredith read those lines, she felt herself relax, knowing that for at least a moment in time, her mother had been excited about her, had loved her.

"Meredith?"

Her head snapped up to see Michael standing in the doorway, a concerned expression on his face. "Michael," she gasped, quickly slamming the book closed and throwing it back into the box. "Um…what are you doing here?"

"I couldn't sleep so I was just going to make some tea," Michael said. "Care to join me?"

"Oh," Meredith nodded as she stood and walked towards the doorway. As much as she loved Derek's father, she'd never spent any time alone with him, but it might be nice to get perspective on the whole dad thing. "Sure."

Michael smiled warmly as he followed her into the kitchen. "So how's it feel to be back in your house?" he asked as he sat down at the counter, allowing her to boil the water.

"It's…weird," Meredith said as she set the kettle on the stove and moved to sit next to him. "I don't really consider this home anymore. If anything, home is with your family, in New York."

Michael smiled warmly. "I'm glad you feel that way, Meredith," he said softly. "Derek loves a lot, and Emma and I…we're just happy to give you a real home."

Meredith blushed and ducked her head, and Michael reached out to pat her shoulder. "Can I ask why you're not sleeping?" he asked.

Meredith sighed as she moved to pull the tea kettle off the stove before it could whistle and wake Derek and Emma. "I just…I can't stop thinking about my dad," she whispered. "I don't know what to do."

"Ah," Michael nodded. "I'm listening, Meredith."

She sighed as she handed him a mug of tea and sat down again, pulling one of her knees to her chest. "When I was a teenager," she said softly, playing with the string of her tea bag. "My friends were always complaining about their parents not letting them do anything and about how protective of them their fathers were. But the entire time, I just wished I had a dad who cared about me to even send a birthday card once in awhile. I was never really involved with boys before Derek, but still…I just wanted a father to look out for me if I wanted to go out on a date and take me out to breakfast every Saturday like Addison's dad did. And…I really wanted someone to punish me."

"Punish you?" Michael asked, eyebrows raised.

"Yeah," Meredith blushed. "I just…I thought if someone cared enough about me, they would punish me when I did something wrong. That's why I dyed my hair pink and started failing tests on purpose, but then I didn't get into Harvard and…I just wanted someone to care."

Michael smiled as he leaned forward to squeeze Meredith's hand. "Emma and I can punish you," he nodded. "And I know you're confused about what to do with your own father, but if you'd like…I can do all the fatherly stuff for you that you want."

Meredith smiled slightly. "You mean when Derek decides he's ready to propose he's going to have to come to you to ask for my hand?" she giggled.

"If that's what you want," Michael said with a nod. "I'm going to have to do it four other times anyways."

"Thank you," Meredith whispered. "It…it means a lot to know that maybe I'm not such a horrible daughter. At least someone wants to be my father."

"The decision is yours, Meredith," Michael said softly. "No one can tell you whether it's for the best to meet Thatcher or not."

"I know," she said softly. "I just need some time."

"You have time," Michael nodded. "Get some sleep, Meredith. You'll be able to think more clearly in the morning."

"Okay," she nodded, moving to place her mug in the sink. "Thank you. For listening. And just…thank you."

Michael smiled as he reached out to pull her into his arms. "You're welcome, Meredith," he said. "I do think of you as one of my own daughters."

She blinked back tears as she pulled back and smiled slightly. "Good night."

"Good night," Michael echoed.

Meredith inhaled deeply as she slipped back into her bedroom, trying to control her tears. The last thing she needed right now was to deal with worried Derek.

"Mer?" she heard him shift under the covers and she slid into bed beside him, smiling when she felt his arm connect with her stomach. "Where were you?"

"Couldn't sleep," she replied. "I tried packing some more."

"You should have woken me," Derek murmured.

"It's okay," Meredith replied, her voice shaky.

"You okay?"

"I'm….no, not really."

"Oh, Mer," he breathed, pulling her fully into his arms. "Is it your dad?"

"Yeah," she whispered. "And I found a box full of my mother's diaries."

"Hmmm," Derek breathed. "Are you going to read them?"

Meredith inhaled sharply for a moment, remembering the one entry she had read about the day she had been born. "No," she whispered. "I don't want to know what she thought about me. This way…I can at least imagine that on some level she probably loved me."

Derek tightened his arms around her and pressed a kiss to the top of her head. "I love you, Mer."

"I know," she whispered. "And right now…that's all I really need."

"Good."

"Your dad offered to be my dad too," she admitted softly.

Derek laughed softly. "My parents are like that," he replied. "They take in people who need it. And you are apart of the family now, Mer, whether you want to be or not."

"I do," she nodded firmly. "I definitely do. But no one's ever really wanted me before, and I'm trying to deal with my own parents not wanting me and your parents that do want me. I'm kind of torn between emotions."

"It's okay to be confused," Derek whispered, squeezing her tightly. "And you can talk to me, you know that, right?"

"Yes," she nodded. "I love you for being so understanding. But some things I need to work out for myself."

"Okay," Derek answered, and she could practically feel him giving her his McDreamy look.

"Can we go to sleep now?" she whispered.

"We can," he said. "Good night, Mer."

"Night, Derek."

XXXXX

There were voices coming from downstairs, and they pulled Derek out of his sleep. He looked down at Meredith, who was finally sleeping soundly in his arms, and smiled slightly before he disentangled himself from her. He couldn't make out what his father was saying, but from the tone of his voice, he wasn't happy.

"Dad?" he asked with a frown as he descended the staircase. "Mom, what's wrong?"

Emma smiled slightly as she looked up from where she was sitting on the couch. "Derek," she said softly. "Good morning."

"Morning," he said distractedly, looking between his parents. "What's going on?"

"That pathetic excuse for a man was just here," Michael said, running a hand through his hair. "I can't believe they let people like that have children."

"Mom?" Derek asked, turning to his mother.

Emma sighed as she glanced towards the staircase, as if assuring herself that Meredith couldn't hear her. "He came to say good bye to Meredith," she said softly. "He said…he said that he's glad she turned out alright and is happy, but he thinks it would be best for his daughters if they didn't have any contact."

"Daughters?" Derek repeated with a frown.

"Apparently he's remarried, and has two daughters. He was heading to the airport to go home. He's settled everything with Ellis's lawyer."

"How can he just…leave her?" Derek breathed. "She's the most amazing girl in the world, and he's just going to leave her again? He'll never know how truly amazing his daughter is, despite his lack of presence in her life."

"I know," Emma nodded, reaching out to place her hand on Derek's arm. "But as I told your father, being angry about this is not going to help Ellis. Now, maybe you can be more of a man and understand that, since your father obviously can't get it through his thick skull."

"How am I supposed to tell her?" he breathed, collapsing onto the couch, next to Emma.

She reached out to gently stroke his hair. "I don't know," she said softly. "He left her a letter. Maybe you should let her read it before you say anything."

Derek nodded slowly. "Yeah," he nodded. "She's strong, she can handle it. I just hate this. I know this is what she had to deal with for her entire life before I met her, and I hate that she ever had to be this depressed and feel this bad about herself. How am I supposed to crush her like this?"

"Like what?"

The three of them turned to look in the doorway where Meredith was standing, a blanket wrapped around her shoulders as she looked at the expectantly. "Derek? What's going on?"