5 July 3130
When the sunlight broke the horizon, it cast its warm rays upon the land.
When the warm rays reached us, our bodies stirred.
In the days that would come, This marked the beginning of something bigger than myself. Everything leading up to the two of us making love in the field under the full moon after having a merger of souls in the pursuit of dance prepared us for what was to come. Gone were my ambitions at this point of putting together a research paper. Compared to the previous night, nothing I ever did from then on would ever be able to measure up to the feelings that we communicated as our bodies, as one, crossed a line.
When my eyes opened, I saw her, sleeping serenely mere inches from me. My hand tightened against hers as I snuggled in to find comfort in her warmth.
I had done it.
By all means, our relationship crossed a line last night, and there was no longer any walking away. I had committed myself to her. I had mated with Aria.
Instead of feeling the weight of my decision, I felt myself wrapped in a sense of rapture. We had, after the chaotic events of the last few weeks, been on the verge of this. It took a beautiful moment of our perceptions joining for me to realize just how wrong I had been. It took yet another for me to realize that the woman I joined hands with that day, was a woman I entwined my fate to. I found "Fallen in love" to be too dull a word. I found "With all of my heart" lacking. Instead, I found bound to be closer.
Last night, during the dance that she taught me, I felt myself merge closer with her. During the dance, I was aware of our soulds comprising some great expanse, and the colors of emotions that we both bore, guided our moves. A rational part of me examined it in detail. What was the purpose of the dance? Was it to build these emotions from the feeling we had? Or was it to use emotion to tell the story through dance? I found it fascinating in its own right, and seemed a more intimate form of art than I had ever been aware of in my life.
A cooing noise came from her tiny lips. The light had fallen on her eyes, and I could feel her stirring in both body and mind. Like a fish rising from the depths, the pull of a peaceful emotion stirred something within me. I wanted to stay like this for a little bit longer. I wanted to bask in the afterglow of what it is we had done.
As her deep red eyes slowly opened, I felt her bliss feeding to me. It grew as if a blanket, then seemed to surround us. The balmy air of mid summer felt cool compared to the warmth that we were enveloped in. Her eyes finally focused as she registered my presence in front of her.
Beh sze... She whispered mentally as her hand lifted to brush my cheek.
Ses frau... I returned.
Words that seemed foreign in the past not rang with pleasant tones to my ears. The emotions contained within them did more to communicate our feelings in this moment than any words we could muster.
Last night was... She began.
I felt the urge not to spoil the moment so I simply nodded.
The happiest moment of my life... I responded.
I felt a wave of joy wash over me as she suddenly grabbed onto my arms, then bodily pulled me closer to her. I felt my chest gently impact her mic tem. Her chest shard. However, the feeling of it pressed against my skin did not feel uncomfortable in the least. Instead, I felt as if my own heart were pushing against my chest to experience the touch of it. I could feel soft heat radiating from it. A sign of the emotions she broadcast.
What we did, was a very symbolic and precious facet of our culture. In the eyes of the te ze, you and I are now fully adults. Ready to begin the task of raising our own ralts. She said.
Doubt washed over me as she said that Aria, I'm not entirely certain we will be able to have children. Not because I don't want them I added that in due to a sense that she wanted to interject But because I do not know if... well, our mating will yield eggs for you. I simply do not know. I've only heard little bits. If we do, then it will mean something very important. However, if you can never have children because of me, I want you to be aware of this. I deeply fear that this one most important aspect will be denied to us. That we will never know the roles of maternalism. That you will regret choosing me as your mate. Since the urge had arisen in me, I wanted to heavily emphasize this point to her. I will never, ever, regret our caim duc, but be aware, that no matter what, we walk an uncertain path. But I will never leave these hands empty.
I watched her for a reaction. Her eyes fell as she contemplated what it was I said, then she looked me in the eyes once more, then offered a small smile.
But you said it yourself, you don't know. Beh sze, you are afraid that we cannot, but your fear is based only on you not knowing. Do not believe that anything is set in stone. If we can, a week will tell. If we cannot, then so be it. I will be very sad by this, but I have you. I trust that you will keep me from falling.
Her words spoke with an unusual clarity. Like a knife, it gently sliced into my uncertainties. Though the way she said it left me confused.
What do you mean by a week? I found myself asking suspiciously.
She gave a grin. Silly! We copulated as I began to feel receptive to you in a more intimate manner. When we reach a certain age, once every 4 months, we are able to copulate and produce an egg. If we have an egg, it will lay in one week. If we cannot have a child because of our differences, I will instead experience great sorrow. It will be then that I will need you with me the most.
She seemed...rather direct in her explanation. I began searching her eyes for an answer.
Aria, that is shockingly explicit. How do you know this so well?
Beh sze, just because we do not have...what do you call them? Where children sit and are taught by a matriarch all day?
School Aria. I said.
School... ha ha I like that word, school. It rolls so well! We do not have schools, but we do teach our young to know themselves. We are aware of our bodies in an intricate way, such as my mic tem. I know that there are blood vessels and a collection of neurons which are arranged in much the same way my emotion center is in my brain. I can feel my body directing blood to them when I need it. In the same way, I can feel and understand my body when it begins preparing. I can feel the egg a day before it is laid. Our awareness of our bodies is much that way.
Wow.
I took a moment there.
So, your psychic abilities lets you understand what your body is doing in a very intricate way? I asked her.
Of course! How else do you think we know so much about them? She laughed as she asked.
Well... humans cut open the dead to learn about what made us work in life. I volunteered.
A look of horror crossed her face.
Why would you desecrate them so?!
I felt panicked as her expression turned to gut wrenching horror.
W-well you see, to us, we understand that after we die, we can learn much about ourselves. So, some people elect to let others use their bodies to learn more about us. Their sacrifice after death allows us to track down the root causes of that death and gives us knowledge about how to prevent the same death from occurring again. If someone is sick, we can examine what was hurt most. What a virus attacks and what it avoids tells us how we can fight it. Using that method, in the past 100 years we have gone from living for only 39-45 years to 75-100 years at a time.
She took in what I said, but seemed confused about the entire concept.
However, she simply nodded as she absorbed the information.
We have reverence for our dead. But we also have a love for life. And if our knowledge means we live for a longer time, then it is worth pursuing. The longer we live, the more full our lives become because we get the chance to do much more with it.
Aria gave me a long look after I said that, then smiled softly. I guess there is much about humans I simply do not know. She said happily.
The same goes for me but... It's a process. I replied.
We Slowly began standing up at that point. Little differences in distance made it seem like even greater ones. instinctively, we held each other close as we quietly walked back to the te ze.
It was still around 7 am when we arrived, so nobody was awake yet. Asa was still sleeping peacefully with her parents the Matriarch and Aitsu. Aina and Aika were still curled up together, lost in dreams. As we walked into the communal area, I became aware that I was still wearing that Gardevoir gown.
Quickly, I felt my modesty catch back up with me. In no time at all, I ducked off into our sleeping area, then quickly got changed.
My jeans slid easily back on with the satisfying noise that such a strangely durable material makes. While I was happy to be rid of the odd garment, I couldn't help but regard it as I put my shirt on. I really thought until recently that their garment evolved with them. It wasn't until that day at the lake that Aria removed hers, showing that it was possible to remove them. This only deepened the mystery really.
I sat in our bed for a moment, then gently pulled out my field notes book. I turned to a clear page then began to write:
5 July 3130,
I made a discovery about the symbolism inherent in dancing. As has been related, the propensity for dance is present in almost all Gardevoir. Even males have a tendency towards it. Based upon observation of Aquamarine Gardevoir, I am now able to discern that it is their way of telling stories. Much like how we as humans have elaborate ceremonies to enact certain cultural customs, they too have shown the proclivity for the same. Their mythological structure though is strongly based in the assumption of emotions. Rational discourse in which only the examination of their symbolism is irrelevant without this understanding.
Concerning the reproductive cycle:
The female is able to spontaneously bring her body to ovulation once every 4 months. Thus, 3 times a year are considered primary breeding season for them. It would appear as though sex is also sometimes seen as recreational as in humans.
Further examination of their culture reveals customs that were previously not recognized as such.
I closed the notebook, then considered what I wrote.
So much was being left unsaid. So much detail... my detail, was omitted. It was as if what I felt was unable to be communicated. Objectivity had a major role in observational science. However, without the understanding of why we did what we did, it just felt hollow.
Beh sze, are you writing in your book again? Aria asked as she walked up to me.
I was, though I have been finding it hard of late to take more detailed notes. They want details that omit my very existence it seems. Like even being here, as a part of the te ze is irrelevant. Like I should be observing like a ghost rather than a member. I said. I confess I was exasperated about writing these observations down. The experience was so much more fulfilling.
She tilted her head as I confessed my frustrations. And what are those little words of yours really meant for anyways? She asked. It was surprisingly direct of her to ask. She new I was researching the Gardevoir, that their ways interested me, but she never asked why I cared so much.
If we understand why you do one thing, we can answer questions about origins. I told you once that it is believed that you and I have a rather recent common ancestor right? That about 15,000 years ago there is evidence that our lines split?
Sure, though it doesn't really mean very much. She replied airily.
I always was confused when she gave dismissive little answers, so I decided to corner her on this.
Why doesn't it? I felt myself asking.
Because, no matter how different we are, we can still find each others hearts! She answered then gave a quiet laugh, careful not to disturb the others. But more seriously, does it really matter? What if we are the same species but separated by a few little mutations? Or even let's say you and I are as different as a ralts is for a pidgey, the question is: Does it really matter? The feeling remains the same no matter what it is.
Sometimes I felt myself disarmed by her reasoning. She was essentially arguing that I was thinking too hard about the matter and that what was really important was the fact that we loved one another. However, I felt the tiniest bit stubborn on this point.
Aria, what if I said you were homo sapien angellus and not confucform angellus? I know you don't really know what those terms mean because unless if you read this stuff all the time, they wouldn't be familiar to you. However, one indicates the proximity genetically to humans, and the other indicated distance. Which would you rather have the world know? Closeness or distance?
She tilted her head abruptly. That's what this is about isn't it? You want the world to see us as close. You can't stand us being different? I picked up on a sense of confusion as she asked the second question. But more importantly, I realized how important to her that question was.
I can't stand that we assume we are so different that we forget to look at how similar we really are. In this world, we are alone. But if we understand how close we are with the other species that inhabit this planet, we feel that much more as a community. I reasoned.
A laugh like the chimes of bells came from her.
You have such weird logic sometimes Beh sze. You wonder why things are and never dream of why not. I've wondered though, have you ever stopped and looked at yourself since getting here? Have you looked in the water lately? So much about your inquisitiveness has changed, but you have not yet learned how to control your emotions. You try holding them back, you try suppressing them, but it comes off silly. You are like a young ralts with them.
Part of being a Human adult is controlling our emotions. The culture I come from values keeping a lid on our emotions. It is essential that we do not let our emotions swing about. I replied.
Somewhere, this had turned into a fight. Well.. it was a disagreement. I wasn't sure what it was precisely but I suddenly had the feeling like I had done wrong by her.
But that's just it! How can you say your culture when we share the same culture! You say part of being human, yet you live here with me and I am not human. Your culture is one of emotion. One you have had a hard time understanding. I see you sitting there with your little book sometimes, trying to puzzle out how what we do means what. But every time you miss the most important thing about our culture. It's not about thinking it all through! It's about feeling your way.
Aria, I'm a human! Pale skin, proclivity towards guns, carrier of pokemon capturing devices...Well ok not me, but of the same species as. But that is my origin. I come from a society which looks at emotions in mixed light. We like to praise them and exalt them, but the second they get in the way of what it is we need to do, then there's suddenly a problem. You can't just-
Would you just stop for a second and listen to yourself? She suddenly asked him. You are trying to rationalize your fear of feeling away. You are trying to justify it with hollow words that you know taste like ash in your mouth! You try holding up human culture, but let's face it: You don't like your own culture very much do you?
I was taken aback. I don't feel one way or another about it.
She suddenly snapped at me. How could you not like your own culture?! You danced with me last night! You partook in the highest cultural tradition with me! You did it eagerly and with a reverence for me that was beyond words! Your culture is my culture now!
Oh.
Oh!
Aria...I.. I started but was met with her sudden words.
Beh sze, before you say "you didn't know" just know that I know. But as long as you have such a muddied view of your world, you will not really understand what it is to be Gardevoir. She then flashed me a look that I couldn't quite understand. However, you really should begin trying to. You are part of that world now. You are, in the eyes of this te ze, gardevoir. Even if you are mostly physically human, you are not seen as human. In fact, the day Matriarch met you, you were not seen as one even then.
What? I suddenly found myself asking in confusion. My mental exclamation was louder than I meant it to be. The entire time we had been keeping our voices down due to the hour. However, as we continued this back and forth, now mostly her chastising me, I know that our voices had risen. In fact, this awareness suddenly caused me to raise my hand, then point to the field. Actually, come on, let's continue this outside near the water. I suddenly found myself saying.
Apparently the same consideration had not crossed her mind. she looked at me with confusion, then narrowed her eyes. Why?
Aria, we are starting to get loud. I just don't want to wake the others with this actually very very very important conversation we are having and-
This isn't a conversation beh sze! You aren't acting very Gardevoir like and I think it's about time you stopped playing Kirlia games and accepted your responsibilities!
Look, I get that, I get that I've been looking at this wrong ok? I just don't want to wake the others. Come on, let's walk and talk. I want to know more after all. I don't even know what I'm doing wrong. So come on, we can talk more outside. I gently took her hand in mine as I said that.
Don't think you can make me forget the conversation by a show of affection or something... She suddenly said.
I felt exasperation build as she said that, but decided not to retort to it. That had a way of backfiring on me.
I won't. I want to know what you mean.
For your little book?
Of course not! This hasn't been about learning more about you for an academic purpose in quite some time! I still write in the book because in 10 days I have to go into santalune city and give a report about what I've learned, but the reason I want to know is because of what you said: I need to accept my responsibilities. I want to know what responsibilities I am missing.
We had since made our way outside and I instinctively made my way over to my now much favored sitting rock that was affectionately called the sitting stool.
At times you are more dedicated to the te ze. You worry too much about how the others are doing. Your responsibility is to me now. We have to be able to feed off one another for our own growths as gardevoir, otherwise our bond will stagnate. She suddenly said as she sat down next to me, perching on the edge of the same rock.
I thought we were supposed to be. I thought it was all about helping them so they can raise their ralts. I said.
It is but... You are neglecting to make sure I am taken care of first.
Aren't I?
Beh sze, when was the last time you fed me emotions?
A look of confusion crossed my face as she said that. Fed emotions? What did she even mean by that?
I know you don't know. So I'll explain. This thing we do... She took my hand, then danced our fingers together on our palms. Is more than just a way to communicate our emotions. It is also something deeper. I Whenever we do this, we feed each other our emotions and vice versa. This is important not just for our bond, but for our empathy towards each other.
I...guess a few days? I had not paid much attention to doing it since we were able to talk and whenever your emotions swelled, for some reason I could just feel them. And I know you cold feel mine, so I stopped asking why.
She gave a small smile. For such a smart beh sze, you can be quite dumb sometimes.
I teasingly dug my elbow gently into her side. This coming from the gardevoir who doesn't see why I was opposed to wearing a garment that women generally wear. Playful yes.
Hey! Men wear that too! She suddenly retorted with a cute angry expression.
Yeah, but then there isn't much difference in appearances save for two real things. I said.
Exactly! She said as she crossed her arms. The sooner you realize that the better too!
I missed something with that.
Yeah, something just went sailing past my head with that comment.
Erm...pardon? I suddenly asked.
Silly! That's what I'm talking about! You are so caught up in human preconceptions that it never occurred to you that maybe your way of looking at things was wrong! Men and women occupy the same roles and the only real difference in the two of us is in our chest and our waist as you so happily discovered last night.
My face blushed. I won't even deny that she had a point.
I'm still physically human though. There is a lot of difference between the males and females of our species.
So what? You are gardevoir now remember? You are one of us because you affirmed m affections and committed yourself to them with your own! No matter what others may say, you and I are bound together by our souls and our love.
It was my turn to be surprised to be honest.
So what if one day I sprung that on you? That in the eyes of society, since you and I had sex last night, you were now human. Would you be able to abandon your ways in an instant?
She gave a considering look.
ha! Got her!
I wouldn't even know how to act! I'd be begging you to teach me how to act human! She suddenly responded with a blissfully happy expression.
"Urk! So...goddamn cute..." I said aloud so that she didn't understand me.
So... shouldn't you teach me? You're the Gardevoir here, not me! I finally said.
That's what I've been trying to do! You always seem to get it a little, but then you just do the most...Human! Things! She exclaimed.
Like what? I suddenly asked her.
Last night you were so embarrassed to come out into the moonlight in that outfit! What does it matter? Who's going to see you? Who's going to even care for that matter? Why were you so worried about it?! You were thinking like a human. But you have to think like a Gardevoir, otherwise, everything that we do will seem strange.
Arg! I could feel the frustration building up in me. I swear, we've wandered around in a giant circle this entire time!
But that's just it! I don't know what thinking like a gardevoir really is yet! I'm asking you to show me!
Then first you have to stop right there. Aria suddenly commanded, then pointed her tiny finger at me.
Then, she suddenly jumped from the rock, then took off running.
I watched her go for a moment then looked on in confusion as she all but frolicked around the field. Had I not been so confused by what it was she was doing, I probably would have joined her.
A few minutes later, she returned to me looking quite cross.
Fail! Try again! She suddenly exclaimed then began tapping me on the head repeatedly.
After a few seconds of this, I noticed my left cheek was beginning to twitch as she did that.
Gah! Stop it already that feels annoying! I suddenly exclaimed.
Pass! Beh Sze reacted emotionally!
Huh?
I.. I don't get it. I admitted.
Gardevoir feel their actions. Sometimes we don't just think about it. You have to be willing to embrace your feelings rather than just think about doing them.
But that's just impulsiveness. If we ran around doing every little thing we felt like doing, how would you and I even get the food picked? How would we collect water and get the food ready for the Ralts? We'd just be running around doing whatever we want.
That's just it! You see those actions as things we have to do! We collect the food and water because we want to! You have to feel that desire for it to really matter! Aria suddenly said exasperated.
I sat back in realization, well at least a partial realization. She didn't do those things because she felt like it was her duty to? She did them because she wanted to?
Little by little, I could feel the links in her logic connecting in my own mind. She loved the Te ze, so she wanted to help them. She loves them enough that it isn't even about obligation to her when it came to tending to the needed duties. It was done because she wanted to. She derived pleasure from helping them out. So, it became a thing she wanted to do rather than something she had to do.
Ses frau you never cease to amaze me... I suddenly said.
Whatever do you mean beh sze? She asked innocently then gave me a radiant smile.
Wanting to help the others because of love only. Is.. it really that simple? I asked her in perfect seriousness.
Of course it is! What, did you think I liked doing those things on their own? She asked. I used to do them because I felt like I had to!
Wait a tic...
I began thinking back to the first week I was here. A memory of recently to be certain, but it felt so far away now. The truth is I hadn't been thinking much of the past.
There was a sense of celebration in the air as she volunteered to collect food one day. Her desire to help out was seen as important somehow but the importance had completely eluded me at the time.
When the other Ralts were born, she began taking on more of a parental role as Aitsu and the Matriarch occupied themselves with tending to the newborn. The sense of celebration and joy was there as well.
I think I was starting to understand, just a little, what she meant.
I could feel a gentle surge in her emotions as I made this connection. Suddenly, she embraced me full on.
I reacted almost without thinking and wrapped my arms around her as she fell into my arms. Then she happily proceeded to exclaim to me
Beh sze is starting to get it finally! You big dummy! I thought you would never understand just what was going on! She released me then backed up with that same smile on her face.
That act of spontaneity, doing something only because you feel love for others, learning something because you love others enough to understand them. Running around the field, frolicking because you love them. Stopping them because you love them and don't want to be mad at them. The first lesson is love. Feel love without effort, and let it guide your desires.
Aria smiled at me as I made that connection.
I could tell without even having to speak what it was she was feeling at that moment.
So, ok, I do love unconditionally. And I do it without thinking about it. I love you. I love it here, I love Asa- Aria gave a slightly hurt look- Like a daughter. Ew... no... Anyways... I do those already though.
Well then let those guide your actions! Not the logic of doing something! She happily exclaimed.
Thank you master Yoda.
I looked at her for the longest moment, then took her hand in mind.
What else? Continue teaching me. Let our emotions be the motivation behind our actions, let it come forth, and let it be spontaneous. Let that be why I do things. Let my emotional connection be why I help raise the Ralts. Let my love for you be why we communicate. The way you put it just makes it seem so simple Aria Ses frau.
Our fingers danced in each others palms as our emotions freely traveled between one another.
Why do I love you? She suddenly asked.
Because we both feed each other. We share the same desires in the ways that matter, and we feel the most open towards each other.
She gave a slight pout, then answered me. You aren't wrong but... it's because I just do. I don't have to justify my love. It is free and it is your love and your love is my love and it resonates between our fec du. Asking why is useless because it simply is. The experience of being in love is enough of a reason for love! Just like how being alive and living your life how you want is itself a meaning for life! What's the purpose of anything? It simply is!
But isn't that just going back to spontaneity? I asked her. I mean, you aren't wrong in a way. But why state something twice?
Understanding the first part is essential to understanding the second part. She chided me. If we don't understand how to love, how can we then understand the importance of feeling it? These are two very important aspects of Gardevoir- Your, culture. You need to understand this if you are to understand just why we have such a reverence for emotions. Why they are so important to our myths.
I leaned in to listen better as she spoke.
Our myths celebrate emotion. They always speak of how important it is to be aware of your feelings and what they do to you. The importance of feeling is highlighted by the experiences of those who feel freely versus those who try to be like you. Those who try not to feel freely, their life is strife with struggle as they have to fight wars with themselves. One reminds me a little of you. There was a little ralts who was walking down a path one day. He came up to a branch where a golden fruit was hanging. Desire filled him as he wanted that fruit. However, he couldn't reach it. So, he decided he would try to get it down. He walked over to the tree trunk and looked at it with all his thoughts.
I know! He cried! I will climb the tree and I will climb to the branch and get it down!
So he dug his little paws into it, and soon enough, he was able to climb up to the bough. Unfortunately, whenever he would try to climb his way out to the branch, it would bend. He couldn't get it without breaking the branch! Undeterred, he decided to try getting it using a stick. So he waved and he waved, but he was unable to get it down that way.
Finally, a gardevoir walked by and saw all the commotion he was causing as he tried to get the fruit. In pity, she reached out and plucked it with psychic. She brought it to the Ralts, then watched him as he happily ate the fruit. However, the fruit did not taste very good suddenly. He looked at the Gardevoir who stood watching him, then broke the fruit in half. He held out his little hand and the piece of fruit for the Gardevoir to take. Happily, she ate the fruit with him. And it was the best food he had ever had.
I tilted my head as she finished the story. However, she suddenly asked me.
Why was the fruit so good?
Because he wanted the Gardevoir to enjoy the reward for getting the fruit?
In a way. She said He felt like she should share in what he got. It became better becaus he wanted her to enjoy it too.
Huh. That's more like a bedtime story really... I said. Myths to humans refer to the metaphorical story for how life is lived. A god gives a man a trial and he gains something from it. He learns a lesson and brings it back to the others. I said.
Well isn't that just saying the same thing? He experiences but wants to share it with others. It doesn't mean anything if it doesn't help others.
So human and Gardevoir mythology is alike? I suddenly asked her.
Yes and no at the same time! Different messages are communicated! Yours is about sharing life, ours starts from the awareness that we are alive. In the present, in the now, it is a given that we share life! We look at it from a place where we learn right and wrong, how to apply it, and how to question it. You simply teach right and wrong and how to live it in that respect. You never ask why and how it feels to you! She replied.
Notions that I previously thought were attributes of Aria which signified naiveté found themselves re-evaluated when she said those words. It wasn't her being naive this entire time. It wasn't her being stupid or anything like that. I was biased in my assumption. I assumed things from my own standpoint. I was biased in my assumptions. The entire time I looked at things from one viewpoint and thus missed the point entirely!
I felt myself begin to laugh.
Soon, the laughter grew out of control as I felt the hilarity of the situation truly come to my awareness. How stupid I was!
Aria could feel my amusement growing exponentially. It was, in a way, feeding off of itself. In a flash, I felt her grab my hand. From her, a calming sensation began to overwhelm me. Little by little, the laughter began to fade, to be replaced instead with a vague sense of euphoria.
What was that all about all of a sudden? Aria asked. Her confusion was evident and to be honest, my ses frau did deserve an explanation.
Aria ses frau, you are incredibly perceptive. I however, am only just now connecting the dots between how you act and how I originally perceived them. Where I thought you were being naive, you were just expressing things from...our cultural perspective. However, I was so wrapped up in how my culture saw things, that I lacked the understanding to see things from a different point of view. I just realized how stupid such things were.
She gave me a searching look as I finished.. then she grinned lightly.
When we first met, I thought a little bit like that. I saw you sitting there in your hide and thought you were just scared. When I saw the deep curiosity in you, and more importantly, the growing desire to understand. I realized that you didn't even know what compelled you yet. When our hearts mingled that day, and our caim duc began to grow, I knew that we could learn from each other and the two of us would learn to love more readily! We need that from each other.
The two of us let our words tail off into a sense of deepened attachment. I finally stood up, then held out my hand to her.
Let's go get food for the te ze together!
With that happy exclamation. Aria and I happily walked over to pick fruits for everyone. I picked Bananas that day due to my peculiar love for them. The two of us worked together, feeling the comfort of each others company as we worked. In a major way, this was a step for me. Starting on that day, I accepted that I was as much a Gardevoir by adoption. By being a part of their te ze, by being a member of this family, I was accepted as such. Even though I was human, that acceptance was not diminished. It was merely a detail that did not detract from my love for them and their love for me. Aria helped me to facilitate this change.
While I had been accepted as a part of the te ze, I realized that my acceptance was emotionally different between the two days. The love felt before and after tht day were completely different. Instead of it feeling as love for a friend, it became more familial. All of it went back to that oh so important discussion with Aria about human culture and Gardevoir culture. We could live in both worlds if we wanted. But to really experience those worlds, we had to understand one and be able to live in it just as readily as others do.
In order to observe one aspect. In order to understand one aspect, another aspect would have to change. In quantum theory, this is understood as the Heisenberg uncertainty principle. There is a limit that describes the precision between to observations. To observe the speed of an electron, you change its position. To observe its position, you change its speed. The day after I made love to Aria under a full moon, I began to change my cultural perspective to better understand her. In order to understand her culture, I allowed mine to change as well.
From that point, nothing I did was purely for the sake of my research. It was for her. It was for my te ze. The research then, was slowly changing not to explain what they did. But why they did it.
I wouldn't even be aware of the consequences until 1 week later.
Oh boy, this chapter... I have thoughts about it.
First off, let me just say that I am not a sexual story writer. So, I hope that people didn't mind too much that I left it out. I felt like it would be more of a distraction as it wasn't so much the act itself. Rather, I always felt that the act represented something. So I wanted to capture what it represented. Further, the discussion they had for the majority of the chapter also represents a major turning point in their relationship. Before this chapter...well, I think you all can see how they saw one another and what the problem was going to be. However, I like the notion of couples actually talking about whats wrong so that they can work together to come up with a solution.
Truth be told, as I built this chapter, I decided to begin addressing a major point in this story. See, all along there has been a metaphor at work. This is a metaphor which I have been slowly crafting, thinking about, and playing with. I started out this story in essence wanting to communicate a few things about gardevoir culture I have been having ideas about thanks in part to other works. However, there also was something I had been crafting as well. As much as this story is about one thing, it is also made equally important by the other things which have crept into this story. I've dropped hints throughout the story. I think I have been blunt on at least a few. However, I did want to take a moment to point out that this story is essentially the story of the metaphor. Each aspect can easily be representational about other things. However, it is more than just the metaphor. It also is meant to examine something. It will be made painfully clear in the next chapter. After chapter 13, I need to make some decisions about how I want to move into the final acts and what 13-20 will spell for any future.
Also, if you are still reading this, then I want to take a moment to acknowledge the encouraging reviews I have received to date. Since there are only 6 so far, it is easier to address a few of them.
Forgoten4now: Yours is best answered as such: I want to apologize to you. See, any action that happens in this plot is only used to drive the important elements of this story. It is sparse because the adventure is more subtle. This story has no antagonists because the conflict is really man vs self in a way. Rowans changes are the big mover of this plot. The effects are what make the plot have relevance. Since Rowan is not useful in any way to others except his new tribe, kidnapping him would not really lead to a major plot development that could be accomplished otherwise. That is to say, nothing in the plot requires a kidnapping. I'm sorry to say but the major conflict will be more...personal than that.
You've given me the germ of a possible potential sequel to this story. If I decide to indulge in it, then action would be a little more relevant to making the plot advance. Though I want to see where this story ends up before I commit to an idea I have no idea if I can really tell a story through.
Pokegamma54: I appreciate your feedback. I hope that you stay tuned as I move this story towards a finale. Originally, I thought this would maybe be a 10 chapter story. Then I wondered if 15 chapters would be enough. Now, as I sit here about to write the connecting elements to multiple messages I have been crafting. I find myself encouraged by your review. Thank you very much again.
Because I like calling you mr. Yolo in my mind:
If you've been able to divine the big plot, then I am happy. The 2 original were laid down with chapters 1-3 which were rather quickly written as I knew precisely how I wanted to set them up. However, the emergence of the other 3 elements which are very important, were more slowly written.
I hope that you tune in. This story has been very personal to me. And while I don't have illusions of it being a great story (It will never be big one as far as I'm concerned), it has been a therapeutic experience. Writing about emotions, and being able to feel those emotions as I write them has been a bit of a new thing. So Sometimes I find great pleasure in that experience.